fern

gender not gendering the way i want it to

As a child I had this idea , that I wanted to be the type of person a mermaid would fall in love with....like I thought that if I was someone who loved the moon, smiled at strangers, liked cloud gazing and star gazing, really connected with nature, was friends with all animals, knew a lot about oceanography and aquatic biology, was kind and compassionate, knew poems at the tip of my tongue, always sang while doing my chores, loved spending time alone, was someone who loved hoarding on knowledge and was a nostalgic person who loved to relish the moment and then remember it as a memory forever, then a mermaid would look at me and like me and maybe wanna be friends with me and then we'd talk for hours and I would make her listen to all my favorite songs and she'd sing for me and we'd make flowed crowns for each other and swim in the ocean after sunset

the skyline falls as I try to make sense of it all.....