it’s okay guys I’m literally as normal as a person in my situation can be

So scary to like a mutual's post because what if they remember they hate me and then shoot me with a gun

subject shows painful degree of self awareness paired with a complete inability to act on it

(smiling serenely) i’m going to attack you now

“Why don’t you use ai” idk man beyond the obvious environmental and “this machine causes psychosis and encourages people to kill themselves” thing I think asking the equivalent of a solid D student who is also a pathological liar if they can answer my question/do the work for me seems pretty fucking stupid

Imagine I was calm and normal about things

your corpse wouldn't even be worth looting in a post apocalyptic wasteland

ohh my god but what if there is still time. what if there is still time. hey. there is still time? there is still time. have you heard. there is still time. hi. there is still time. did you know. there is still time.

"sorry for spam liking" sorry for redirecting the asteroid from planet earth thats what you sound like. thats literally what you sound like

Most horror films show your teenage years as this powerful time where all those possibilities enable you to fight against a threat from outside. I saw the TV glow does the exact opposite. It shows the emptiness, the endless existence of adolescents. Knowing that something is wrong, the need to change while being absolutely terrified of change. Growing up queer, autistic, depressed, trans and/or with strict parents, realising that you do not belong but a part of you tries to conform so fucking bad. This movie was able to show the horror of surviving instead of living.

Oddly enough one of the most meaningful/painful parts of I Saw the TV Glow was when Owen is sitting there, watching the old tapes, someone with a family and an adulthood (or so she tells us), however small and sad that life is, and she tells us how abjectly humiliated she is rewatching them. The cheesiness of the show, its stilted and childish plots, the bad acting and bad visuals and whatever else— Owen is humiliated to have been saved by this bad TV show. And regardless of the fact that I don’t think the Pink Opaque she watches is the actual Pink Opaque that saved her, it tunes into this fascinating and essential part of living dissociated from your actual life and restored/saved/rescued by media, which is the shame of living like this. Yes, this was the thing that helped me survive; it was awful and childish and embarrassing and I can’t believe I survived it, I can’t believe I got through this period with the help of this. It’s so easy, when your life is so small, to be ashamed of your lifelines: it’s so easy to survive and look back and be horrified at how pathetic (however untrue it may be) and pitiable you were, and then, in reaction to that blinding embarrassment, lash out at your former self, try to say how much you’ve moved on (because you’re better now, of course you’re better, you don’t need to be saved by anything, right?). You loved this? The reason you’re alive is because of this? How embarrassing. How sad.

what i love about both I Saw the TV Glow and We're All Going to the World's Fair is that both movies really understand the tv/computer screen as a space of negotiation between one's sense of identity and the world. it's not so much that tv shows and the internet are used as escapism but that the screen itself functions as a sort of portal or mirror that creates this place of identification, but also of annihilation, where people can construct new images of themselves, reimagining themselves as something more real.

i’ve gone back into my cage cuz i was doing much better in my cage actually

after being mutuals for a certain time tumblr should give you a coupon for a free trip to hang out with them