Pixels Apart

It’s finally time to review one of my all-time favourite games.

I first played Persona 5 around 3 years ago, and I’ve really grown since then in a few ways. A few thoughts before I begin: a) since my first playthrough, JRPGs have cemented themselves as one of my favourite types of games; b) I don’t hate all turn-based RPGs except Pokémon anymore!; c) after my first playthrough I went to Japan, and as Persona 5 is set in Tokyo, playing Royal was a lot of fun as I knew a lot of the locations, which meant I could dive into the setting deeper than the first time; and d) my 250 hours of playtime in total across both playthroughs can most likely be attributed to the incredible writing and masterful character development.

Warning: HEAVY story spoilers

I’m not trying to sell you a game. I want to give you an in-depth analysis of the story, characters, gameplay and all other aspects of this brilliant game, spoilers and all. I want a discussion. So, dive in and see what I really thought, no holds barred.

The Silence is Deafening

‘…’ – a direct quote from our protagonist, there. Our silent hero, codename Joker, is a victim of circumstance. Wrongfully accused of assault by a mysterious man who is angered that a kid prevented him from forcing a woman into his car et al., he must move away from his hometown to wait out his probation period and live a normal student life. Why must he live above a failing café under the guardianship of the cranky owner? Not to mention: why is he banished to Tokyo of all places, somewhere very likely much more exciting than wherever his hometown is?

Either way, Joker isn’t going to tell you. He’s quiet and lets the other many, many other characters do the talking for him—a usual trope of JRPGs, but it is still an issue as he is also put on a pedestal as an incredibly special, talented, empathetic and all-round great guy. He’s the only one capable of saving the world, as he has abilities no-one else has, for some reason.

But this isn’t as bad as I’m making it out to be. Sure, it doesn’t really make sense why you have such a huge following when you don’t have much of a personality, but that’s the beauty of the silent protagonist. You, the player, are the protagonist. The fact that you can even put your own name in as his name is telling. You make the decisions, you make the friends, and you carve out your own destiny from the choices you make. It’s always these kinds of games that, when I talk to my friends, I say ‘I messed up with Sojiro’ or ‘I went to the arcade today’—and it is me. Because even though I’m not a woefully silent Japanese male teenager with glasses, for the time I’m playing Persona 5, I am.

So, you are the protagonist. You learn that there are mental shutdowns all over Tokyo, making people go crazy and kill lots of people, such as a conductor crashing his train, or simply killing people on the spot. It’s weird, but what can you do? You’re just a student with his own problems: not only do many of the students avoid you because you are a delinquent, but the volleyball coach, Kamoshida, seems to be harassing students, from the ones on his team who seem terrified of him, to girls that are being hit on. When a strange app appears on your phone, you accidentally find yourself in the metaverse, along with Ryuji, who also has a good reason to get revenge on Kamoshida.

I Am Thou, Thou Art I

What teenager doesn’t have a rebellious self hidden deep within their subconscious? Well, these teens can utilise that hidden self past its usual constraints to overcome the crappy adults that suppress them and make detrimental decisions for them. Once Joker and Ryuji, and later many other young adults, realise this potential and recognise that these adults need to be stopped, they are awakened to their Personas. A Persona is a manifestation of a persona user’s personality, which the individual can use to face hardship and overcome injustice, even if just in the Metaverse, the collective unconscious world.

But, really, there’s no ‘just’ about it. Here in this world, which take the form of Palaces, the Phantom Thieves (you and your friends) can defeat the ruler of the Palace (the adult with a distorted desire) to convince them to change their heart. In this way, the ‘real’ them in the real world will atone for their actions and justice can be served. So, really, your actions are vital to solving crimes, dealing justice and, eventually, saving the world.

These Personas are like Pokémon for adults. You are special, as you can catch and wield multiple Personas, allowing you to have a whole array of powers, but your friends have one that they train and evolve throughout the course of the story. Catching them is a skill: you have to learn their weakness, and use a skill that takes advantage of it to ‘down’ the Persona. This gives you a chance to either: perform an ‘all out’ attack which sees all your allies fight them at once for increased damage; ask them for money or an item; or negotiate with them to convince them to become a part of you (and thus catch them for use later). This gets harder when there are multiple different Personas to battle at once, all with different weaknesses and strengths that means you must time your combat precisely to ‘down’ them at the same time.

Personas are one of the best parts of the game, as you can see.

Not happy with a persona’s moves, or you want to create stronger ones? Go to the Velvet Room, where Igor and the Twin Wardens Justine and Caroline will fuse two or more Personas together to create new ones.

This is where the Pokémon element is better and worse. You can get completely new and stronger Personas immediately, which is cool, but if you are particularly drawn to one it doesn’t make sense to keep using them as they will level up far quicker if you fuse them than if you keep them. I struggled with this at first, as Arsene is your first ‘official’ Persona, and I couldn’t quite believe you are only meant to have him for the first few hours. It’s like Ash giving up Pikachu after defeating Brock!

Also, have you seen how you have to fuse them? It’s so dark and unnecessarily vivid! You have to guillotine, electric chair or hang them in order to create these new Personas, which is so different to Persona 4 where the Personas are cards, making it less gruesome to get rid of your companions. It definitely made me feel bad for fusing them, but that didn’t stop me!

Essentially, the Persona franchise wouldn’t be the same without all the incredible Personas you fight and capture along the way. It really encapsulates what the games are like: stylized and deeply considered, exuding character and imagination throughout.

Take Over, It’s Time to Put You Down

Using these Personas are a lot of fun, too. The moves are elemental as well as physical, they can inflict ailments such as ‘sleep’ and ‘fear’, and evolve as you and your Personas level up. Personas all have strengths and weaknesses, and by fusing them, you can create Personas with stronger moves and resistances that, as you get towards the end of the game, means that you can fuse some incredibly powerful Personas that can fight any and all enemies, if you’re smart with the moves you inherit.

This all sounds very similar to Pokémon, right? Well, there are other more showy, fantastically fun elements that integrate beautifully with the stunning graphics to make every battle (which have the potential to become very repetitive) exciting and challenging. When a character manages to ‘down’ an enemy by using a move that is strong against it, they can either do another attack or choose to Baton Pass to an ally, chaining super-effective attacks to down multiple enemies in one round, which is useful if there are a lot of different enemies with different affinities and weaknesses. Then, once all enemies are downed, all allies can come together for an All Out Attack for an extra boost of damage.

As much as this is useful for the player, if the enemy downs one of your allies, they can also do a secondary attack, which means that they have the potential to wipe out your team very quickly. Plus, some moves are one hit kills, which may have low accuracy but is still extremely frustrating sometimes, particularly in regular 5 where I found the combat more challenging. The worst boss fight was Haru’s dad, where I actually had to change difficulty for the only time throughout the game—who decided it was a good idea to revive the robot shadows if you didn’t kill them in three moves?!

The Showtime moves, new for Royal, bring a fresh new element to the game. As you progress through the story, your allies start forming bonds, which will then be reflected in combat. At seemingly random times, they can join up with fantastic new animations (such as Yusuke cooking Ryuji some yummy food at a bar, who get interrupted by a shadow coming in the door, and they both take it out) and inflict massive damage. I was sad that Joker doesn’t get one, until the Royal section where baes Akechi and Sumire both team up with you respectively for new Showtimes. It made me wonder whether Joker just wasn’t as close to the rest of the team as he becomes to Akechi and Sumire, which actually also made me glad that I focused on both of them heavily in my playthrough!

Every song that plays throughout the game, including combat, is a banger, so even though my husband got annoyed hearing it coming out of my TV for 120 hours, this soundtrack will remain one of my favourites to date. Overall, the combat is great, and thankfully not too repetitive after so many hours of gameplay.

Adulting is Hard

The story of Persona 5 is deeply gripping, and keeps you invested and interested the whole way through. It didn’t absolutely destroy me like other JRPGs have done (see: Final Fantasy XV), but fun, emotive and has huge repercussions if you don’t succeed in your mission, including people dying and the world ending. No pressure, then.

Your actions, then, are crucial to making the world a better place: and the villains that you encounter are integral to succeeding. In true revolution fashion, it’s the kids that need to stand up to the adults to rid them of their distorted desires—but it’s not all random. The adults are truly abhorrent (the first one, Kamoshida, sexually assaults female students and physically abuses members of his volleyball team) and they continue a running thread from first to last—that is, the ones who you think aren’t connected at all seem to be connected to the final villain by the end. It’s very clever, and kept me gripped the whole way through—something that’s needed with 80+ hours of gameplay.

The writing is absolutely fantastic. All characters have their own distinct mannerisms, personalities and stories, which you get to explore with the Confidant mechanic (see below). The voice acting is great, and as I progressed through the Confidants, I really started to feel like they were becoming my friends, and that every time I turned on my PS4 I was hanging out with my pals again. It’s the way games should make you feel—like you actually care about what will happen to them.

This does make the game quite stressful (in a good way), as what you do has actual repercussions. It’s a bit frustrating sometimes that some of your dialogue doesn’t affect the game at large, as well as your romance choices. None of the characters acknowledge you have a girlfriend, and if you date Ann, for example, she won’t act any differently than if you decide to not even become her friend. While that’s disappointing, other dialogue choices can completely affect your game so that you always have to be very careful with your decisions. Will you get the ‘bad’ ending, where you fail to stop the final villain; the ‘good bad’ ending, where you accept his distorted view of the world; or the ‘true’ canon ending, where you revert the world to normal? A lot of choices throughout this lengthy game affect what ultimately happens, so you do feel like you’re affecting the story a lot more than, say, Pokémon. In fact, in Royal, you can even miss out on a whole section of the game…

Ascending to Royalty

As long as you max your Confidant links with Akechi (the renegade teen detective), Kasumi (the new gymnast freshman at your school) and Maruki (the school counsellor), you get to experience the 30+ hours that Royal adds to Persona 5. And—major spoilers here—once you’ve defeated the God of Control and exposed Akechi for the unhinged betrayer that he is, you should go to juvenile detention and your ability to use Personas should be gone for good, as Momentos has been destroyed.

However, in Royal, Maruki has figured out how to use cognitive psience—and you’re the reason why. His sessions with you has helped with his research, and so now he can make the world a better place by granting everyone’s desires in the collective unconsciousness.

As you can see by his actions, he’s not your typical antagonist. His heart is completely in the right place: he wants to make everyone happy by granting their desires for them, such as bringing back Futaba’s dead mother and helping Ryuji recover so he can get back on the track team. I resonated with that, and actually wondered whether it would be worse for certain characters, particularly Futaba and Haru who get to spend time with their respective dead parents, to reject the “blissful ignorance” reality that Maruki had created for them in favour of the truth.

By this point, I had grown rather fond of the deranged but entertaining firework that Akechi has revealed himself to be, and once I learned that Akechi would die (as he did in regular 5) if Maruki’s reality were to be revoked, I almost chose to accept it. But Akechi being adamant that he was going to stop Maruki no matter what as he didn’t want to live under anyone else’s rule helped make that choice for me. It was difficult, though. Akechi’s is a motive that is simultaneously selfish and noble: selfish as he doesn’t want anyone else to control him, even if that means other people are happy, but noble because he values the truth above all else. Plus, the fact that he was one of the main villains throughout the story up until this point made me question whether we should continue to trust him, even though he had decided to help us, even if it were primarily for his own gain. I think my fondness for him (perhaps because he is a fully-fledged Confidant in this game, unlike regular 5) and the wildcard elements he brought to the game made me feel a certain brand of loyalty towards him, and so I chose to honour his “dying wish”. And, of course, this path led to the ‘true’ ending!

This indecision is shown most clearly in Maruki’s palace, where you have to deduce what decisions in certain situations Maruki would think is the ‘right’ one. It really helps you understand where he’s coming from. For example, his question ‘if your friend is being attacked, and you don’t have much time before they get seriously hurt, would you a) run to get help but you might not make it back in time, or b) join the fight to help but you might get hurt yourself?’ Neither answer is necessarily wrong, but b) is correct as Maruki simply wants you to look out for yourself over others. The crux of his viewpoint is that you should endeavour to make yourself happy or safe, even if that means others may not be. It’s a very interesting conundrum, and one I enjoyed debating philosophically whilst playing.

The concept of right and wrong and mental health was also tackled in this game through Kasumi/Sumire. Ultimately, even though Maruki wanted to help her by allowing Sumire to pretend to be her dead sister, as she blames herself for her death, he ultimately did her more harm than good. With the support of Joker and the others Sumire was able to overcome her delusions and grow into a strong, confident young woman. This cemented for me how backwards Maruki was and that reality is the most important thing, even if it’s not always what we want, because that’s life. In this way, I feel that Royal added something to 5. Even though going into someone’s mind palace was about mental health, I never really considered it until Royal dealt with an innocent traumatised girl and a misguided man attempting to heal her. I applaud Atlas for tackling something so difficult pretty well.

Confident in my Confidants

It’s a good thing the player can really get into the story, because it’s heavily dependent on personal decisions and making friends.

In order to get stronger within the Metaverse, Igor, the man inside the Velvet Room, tells Joker that he needs to strengthen the relationship with his friends first. This is absolutely true—not just with your teammates, but with other individuals who live in Tokyo too, in the form of the Confidant mechanic. For example, while your teammates all get skills such as curing afflictions and taking fatal hits for Joker, others give just as much if not more valuable perks, such as Kawakami giving you more free time or Mishima allowing all teammates to gain experience even if they don’t contribute to the battle once you max them out.

The way you level them up is through socialising. This passes time, but is also incredibly interesting, as each Confidant has a gripping story (except Ohya!). You can’t downgrade a Confidant, but picking the right dialogue choices can make leveling them up much quicker in a game where time is everything. It’s also necessary to level up your stats, such as knowledge, kindness and charm, to allow you to progress with some Confidants and be empathetic or charming enough to deal with the situations thrown at you. I loved the dual play style of dungeon battles and social simulation—in a lengthy game, it broke up gameplay and kept it fresh.

As this was my second playthrough, I already knew that maxing certain Confidants would yield the best results, such as Kawakami and Yoshida who eventually allows you to negotiate with and catch shadows of a higher level than you. But in Royal, the new additions of Counselor, Faith & Justice—Maruki, Kasumi & Akechi—freshened things up. Technically, Justice isn’t new, but you can now hang out with him instead of his progress being facilitated purely by story.

Time to rate my friends from worst to best!

21: Ichiko Ohya Devil Arcana

I found this alcoholic journalist very annoying. Her story isn’t that interesting, she isn’t very nice, and the skills that she gives you to allow you to sneak around Palaces easier aren’t worth it either. I only maxed out her story near the end as I had time, but honestly, she shouldn’t be a priority.

20: Iwai Munehisa Hanged Man Arcana

Didn’t think anything of him until Royal, where I had more time to learn about his time in the Yakusa and his son. Useful for guns (which aren’t even an integral part of combat, really), but other than that I barely used his shop—plus you have to have high Guts in order to progress. Definitely better Confidants out there.

19: Tae Takemi Death Arcana

The fact that this doctor is a sexy goth is probably the best thing about her. You can level her up quite early on, so she is quite exciting at the beginning as she’s one of the only adults you can turn into a Confidant at that point, but after a while she stopped being interesting to me. In my Royal playthrough I found I didn’t need many healing items—SP was far more important!—and in the end I didn’t max her out. A fun outfit, but can leave her.

18: Shinya Oda Tower Arcana

Definitely annoying (but what little brother isn’t?) but there’s a sad reason for that—his mum is emotionally abusive, even if she doesn’t mean to be. In the end I wanted to max him out to save him from that life, but I never quite got that far. At least I managed to change his mum’s heart before I finished the game.

He’s also quite useful in buffing gun attacks and bonuses for downing and negotiating, so definitely useful for combat. I just ended up feeling bad for him, but he was also a bit of a shit, being a bully to his classmates; his big bro Joker helped with that!

17: Hifumi Togo Star Arcana

I never got to know her in my first playthrough, and I didn’t realise how useful she is for battles. She eventually allows you to swap players in combat, hastens escapes, improves money hauls, and allows back-up members to do follow up attacks. I’d definitely give her a shot for just those bonuses, even if you don’t want to romance her—but she is sweet, if very detached from the rest of the story.

16: Chihaya Mifune Fortune Arcana

I maxed her out pretty quickly so I could get the fortune readings; affinity was especially useful, as you can level up Confidants a tiny bit quicker, for a price. And, after she takes 100,000 from you near the beginning (!) and eventually gives it back, she’s lovely. Nothing special, and definitely not one to romance, but nice.

15: Twin Wardens Justine & Caroline Strength Arcana

Their Confidant path was slightly different: you have to show them Personas with specific moves, and they will level up. This was very interesting, and also put a natural brake on their relationship, as some Personas can’t be made until you are a certain level. They are also very useful as you eventually unlock group Persona fusions and can fuse Personas of a higher level than you, for a price. Always fun to get the ridiculous Personas a bit earlier on! Also, their story was super interesting, due to the mystery that surrounds their identities…

Also also, Royal gives a new element to your relationship with them. You can now take them out of the Velvet Room to show them ‘human things’, like aquariums and cinemas. I didn’t utilise this much as you only get skill cards, and no actual level progress, but I wish I had more time, as the dialogue in these sequences is hilarious as they try to understand why humans would do certain things. The fact that I’ve ranked them so low is telling—there are so many fun and useful Confidants that mean they rank this low. 

14: Yuuki Mishima Moon Arcana

I actually think you’re a bit mean to him—he’s definitely your friend, but every time you are asked to clarify this the dialogue choices make you seem like a dickhead when you say he’s only ‘sort of’ your friend! He’s helped you so much, stop being such a dick, player. Plus he helps increase EXP, as well as allows EXP to be given to back-up members so it’s definitely a good thing to max him earlier. Plus, he’s sweet, and gives you Momentos requests. Justice for Mishima!

13: Takuto Maruki Councillor Arcana

Lovely. What a gent. Shame he turned out to be distorted by deciding to change people’s realities by interpreting their vague wants instead of actually asking people if they’d WANT their realities changed or not. Sounds a bit like Thanos to me, but with a better reason to be evil.

The bonuses of Maruki though are: he’s interesting; he’s lovely; and his bonuses are mainly SP based, which is always hard to recover in Persona, especially in the early stages of the games. He raises your SP, gives you a chance to instantly recover ailments, gives you a chance to become focused and therefore raises your attack, and gives you a chance to recover your SP when low. Very useful, and you can’t play the Royal storyline without maxing him out before November 18th anyway.

12: Haru Okumura Empress Arcana

Again, I wasn’t too much of a fan of Haru on my first playthrough (perhaps because she’s quite a late addition to the team), but this time round, I had more time to get to know her. I really wanted to save her from her awful fiancé, and hoped I’d be able to say ‘don’t marry him, marry me!’ if I chose to romance her, but alas. I was also quite surprised with how business-orientated she is, which was a surprise. However, she was just too prim and proper for me, and even after her story showed her to be evolving into a confident woman, she didn’t evolve quite enough for me to be interested.

She’s useful, though, as all the Confidants are who are your team members, so leveling her up is a must, for help in combat and to evolve her Persona.

11: Morgana Magician Arcana

Morgana was the most useful as the support hero—I always wanted him in my party, particularly in hard battles, just to keep me and my allies alive. Plus, who doesn’t love a talking cat? Though, at one point, he does get moody and very annoying. While Morgana as a character was never that exciting past being the initial reason they can become Phantom Thieves and the mystery surrounding where he comes from, Royal switched that up by turning him into a dreamboat with piercing blue eyes when Maruki made his dream of being a human come true. They kept saying throughout this sequence how beautiful he was, which was amusing. A nice twist on the original game.

10: Toranosuke Yoshida Sun Arcana

I learnt to level this fallen-from-grace politician up quickly from my first playthrough as, once you max him out, you can negotiate easier with shadows of your own level, and negotiate with higher level shadows and add them to the compendium—absolutely necessary. Also, he’s basically a massive socialist leftie, so he rocks.

9: Yusuke Kitagawa Emperor Arcana

I didn’t like him much in my first playthrough, but now I appreciate him far more—he’s flamboyant, artistic and, best of all, happy to be in his own mind and be himself, no matter what people think of him. He’s a bit stuck up sometimes, but all in all he’s an outsider who fits in better than he really should. And he provides funny dialogue, particularly when interacting with Futaba. I also love his Showtime moves with Ryuji and Ann.

8: Ann Takamaki Lovers Arcana

I’m quite surprised she’s this low down for me, but even though she’s the first girl you befriend and she’s hopelessly beautiful to everyone who meets her, she doesn’t quite push past the ‘ditzy girl’ trope. The story does try to make her more nuanced, and to an extent it works—she’s also fun, thoughtful and empathetic—but there’s just too many misogynistic and ditsy jokes that even only a few years later don’t land anymore. Saying that, she literally uses her sexuality to break free of the misogyny that surrounds her body and the sexual abuse and prejudice she experiences, at the most from the volleyball teacher, and at the least from everyone around her. It’s a steep hill to climb, but she’s doing it.

I drew the picture below!

7: Sadayo Kawakami Temperance Arcana

Kawakami’s your teacher—what could possibly go wrong? Well, she’s also a sexy maid who comes over to clean up, though she won’t go any further as you’re her high school student. Yet. It’s a bit dodgy, especially as she acts like your mum, but even so, the forbidden fruit angle is fun. Her story is also compelling. Not only is she an interesting Confidant, but one of the most useful ones for the amount of extra time she gives you when you level her up. Why on both my playthroughs did I not level her up immediately?

6: Sojiro Sakura Hierophant Arcana

He’s your guardian who takes you in when you have to move from your hometown after your alleged assault to live out your probation. He starts out cranky, but has an absolute heart of gold. He ended up being one of my favourite Confidants—plus, he’s one of the most useful, as he is one of the only ways to get SP in the early game by making coffee and curry. You need to understand the pride I got from making coffee that met his expectations!

5: Futaba Sakura Hermit Arcana

Sojiro’s adopted daughter is so much fun that I romanced her in the first game. While some may think she’s more like a little sister, she’s just a bit more immature because of her hermit lifestyle and Arcana. She’s funny, loves games, and has great references; she is one of the only instances of a game that has a young girl who doesn’t sound like 40-year-olds trying to sound like teenagers. She has a heartbreaking story, but her personality keeps it light. She says it how it is, no matter what anyone else thinks. She’s great.

4: Kasumi/Sumire Yoshizawa Faith Arcana

I chose to romance the gymnast honour student in Royal, because how can you not romance the new girl? Though I wasn’t sure at first, as I found her quite twee at the beginning. However, she became a lot more nuance when she became Sumire, which is to be expected. Plus, she is really well integrated into the story and really makes you feel she cares about you. She has an amazing costume when she is Codename: Violet, and gives you some truly useful abilities, such as ambushing from a distance and avoiding being surrounded by shadows. She’s a great addition to an already great game.

3: Makoto Niijima Priestess Confidant

She’s bestgirl in terms of smarts, badassery, and simple relatability. She is Student Council President, an honour student, and has been manipulated by evil adults for their own distorted desires. Her parents have died, which instils her with deep guilt for being a burden on her sister. She’s also the only one whose Confidant story doesn’t actively revolve around herself: she changes, but it’s through helping her friend who may be a victim of trafficking rather than her own self-interests. She’s sharp, poised and even more badass when she awakens to her Persona, Johanna—it’s a freaking motorcycle!

2: Ryuji Sakamoto Chariot Confidant

Your best buddy. I’m always drawn towards these ones, who are treated a bit dumb but are loyal to the end. He’s also hilarious, like when he complains the Phantom Thieves are in the shadows and not getting any credit, and I chose the option ‘I like the shade’, he says ‘what are you, moss?!’ I really do wish I could romance him, because I can see a lovely storyline where he’s unsure at first but the fact that they’re soulmates transcends gender.

1: Goro Akechi Justice Confidant

I’m almost hesitant to admit I find him the most fascinating and fun. Not only is he dangerous, exciting and unhinged, he's at the centre of an incredible twist. He’s one of the most interesting characters, and you never know what he’s going to do next. I would definitely date him if Japanese games let gay relationships happen; he has all the best attributes for a crazy romantic relationship. Not IRL, but in a game, why not?

I love that he didn’t die and teams up with you in Royal, and that . He’s also the first character that Joker gets a Showtime move with, which made it quite special. When it is revealed just how evil and crazy he is, his whole character changes, including his Persona, his Phantom Thieves outfit, and his demeanor—it’s scary how excited he is by killing, but at the same time, he is absolutely certain of his viewpoints and won’t compromise for anyone. Many of these points would be a reason why he shouldn’t be my number one, but I can’t help it.

Honourable Mentions: Igor (Fool Arcana), Sae Niijima (Judgement Arcana) & Jose

Igor is the ruler of the Velvet Room, and the person who facilitates your rehabilitation in changing peoples’ hearts. However, ‘person’ isn’t quite right for Igor: he’s the God of Control, born from the desires of the collective masses who want to be controlled and be told what to do rather than make difficult decisions. It was a cool twist to realise that the God of Control had been impersonating the real Igor; I don’t know if Igor was lovely in the previous games, but he certainly is once you restore him at the end of 5. Despite him being interesting, I never felt like I had a connection with him, as you level up his Arcana automatically throughout the story, and he never tried to have a personal relationship with Joker.

Sae has her own palace and Arcana, but she’s not quite the same as the others. Like Igor, you level up automatically throughout the game when you confess to her the whole Phantom Thieves story, and while she does have a Palace, she doesn’t through any huge transformation other than realising that learning the truth is better than trying to win at any cost. She’s cool, and her outfit in her Palace is sexy, but you can’t romance her and can’t change much of what you say to her. I wish in Royal she could have been a fully fledged Confidant instead.

Jose counts even less. A new addition to Royal, he helps you change the cognition of Momentos by collecting stamps as you go further down, and he gives you items in exchange for flowers, so he definitely makes Momentos better. However, his addition is nothing world-shaking, and he only shows up randomly, which makes him quite annoying. I could have done without him, but at least he made Momentos more interesting than in the base game, which, compared to Palaces, was quite boring.

All in all, my main issue with the Confidant system as that you still can’t date boys. We’ve been saying for years ‘that’s just the Japanese way’, but considering the crazy hentai they bring out (still with only very little amounts of yaoi/gay hentai) it may be time to stop excusing them for not being with the times. Catherine: Full Body aimed to dispel that somewhat—perhaps Persona should too.

A Momentous Game

Overall, this is one of my favourite games of all time. The gameplay keeps me entertained for 100+ hours (though, to be fair, I do love long games) and the characters and writing makes me emotionally connect with the story they are telling. I’d suggest playing for at least 8 hours, as it’s a slow burn, but once that hurdle is jumped the real obsession begins.

Time to go and play Persona 4 Golden, as I’m not quite ready for the fun to be over yet.

Warning: HEAVY story spoilers

I’m not trying to sell you a game. I want to give you an in-depth review and analysis of the story, characters, gameplay and all other aspects of this brilliant game, spoilers and all. I want a discussion. So, dive in and see what I really thought, no holds barred.

 King of the Norse

‘I don’t want it’, says the Jon Snow of the God of War franchise, Kratos. He doesn’t want to be a god, he doesn’t want to interfere or help in others’ lives, he doesn’t want his son to know his past—or to remember it himself, for that matter. But this fish-out-of-water story of a Greek god living in a Norse world forces him to accept his past, present and future.

The story is blissfully and tragically simple. A man sets out to spread the ashes of his recently deceased wife and mother of his son, Atreus, and to honour her by doing so on the tallest peak in all the realms, as was her request. This aim seems completely achievable: you can even see the peak of the mountain in the distance as you set off. But if I know anything about journeys, it’s that they are never that simple. A mysterious man who can’t be hurt attacks Kratos, for reasons unknown. The mountain may not be their final destination after all. And a man and his son set out on a journey that is as much about their relationship as much as it is about fulfilling their loved one’s final wishes.

 A (Reluctant) Man of the People

If you’ve read enough of my reviews by now, you’ll know that open world is one of my favourite video game tropes. GOW isn’t quite open world but still enough to sink your teeth into. In fact, the open world elements adopted by the game makes finishing it a lot more doable than traditional giant open world games, like Skyrim or The Witcher 3 with their hundreds of side quests all over the map. There are side quests in GOW, sure, but they are called ‘Favors’ (which melds well with the overarching theme of gods and sacrifice in the narrative) and fall into five sub-categories for a total of only sixteen favors: dwarfs, wayward spirits, dragons, realms, and Valkyries.

However, even though they aren’t technically counted as favors, there’s a multitude of other tasks to complete, such as closing Realm Tears by fighting elite monsters, collecting artifacts and lore about the world, and killing Odin’s spiritual raven spies. I’m not going to 100% the game or anything, but I love searching every corner of the map to complete that satisfying checklist of things to find.

However, I did find my anxiety spiking a few times with the fact that you don’t have all your powers at once. Sure, it’s useful when the lack of powers blocks you out of places the story doesn’t want you to get to yet, and it’s quite nice to go to old familiar places and uncover new areas and collectibles, but I was always wondering whether I was missing something, and whether I should just wait to go back to exploration areas when I actually have all the powers I need. Obviously there needs to be room for progression, but some puzzles couldn’t be solved without specific powers. Sometimes I wondered whether I was simply not doing the puzzle properly. It all became clear as the game progressed, but even so, I’m sure I spent more time than I should have done in some areas attempting to complete an area that couldn’t be completed. It often made me less willing to comb the area as I could never be sure if I had more to find than first apparent. This also made finding high level enemies another trigger to my must-complete-everything-while-I’m-here mentality. Thankfully, the map always logged where Realm Tears were if I couldn’t quite beat them yet. I only wish the map would do the same for Winds of Hel or other power puzzles that I would pass mournfully on my way to defeat a dark elf or two.

The actual favors encapsulate the very best of what GOW 4 has to offer: fetch-quests for your friends in the form of wisecracking dwarfs; helping the innocent such as allowing lost souls to find peace and freeing giant dragons (though you’d have thought they’d stop trying to attack you long enough to realise you are trying to HELP them); and incredibly challenging battles that help the realms and prove your worthiness simultaneously.

Sure, half the time Atreus instigates helping the innocent: Kratos, true to form, insists that helping others is experience for his son, or useful in gathering resources for their journey. Though, perhaps sometimes he doth protests too much, particularly when pushing back against helping the mysterious Witch of the Woods and the dwarfs. He claims that they are useful, and thus performing tasks for and not making enemies of them is helpful in achieving their goal, but we see his heart thawing the more time he spends with Atreus. We see you, Kratos, learning to love again even as it scares you. And it’s endearing, if not often very frustrating. Which leads us on to…

 Atreus and the Struggles of Parenthood

Atreus’ empathy is also often his fatal flaw. He wants to help everyone, while Kratos wants to stay out of many conflicts, stating that one rarely knows the full story and thus cannot take sides—a definitive sum of the lessons he learned in his regretful past. As an ancient being—hey, James, how old is Kratos? You don’t know? Two thousand or something? Fine I’ll Google it. It’s uncertain but probably around 1050. Damn—he obviously has much more wisdom than a young boy. He is right when he advises Atreus to keep out of the war between the light and dark elves in Alfheim, though he’s not opposed strongly enough to not kill them as they get in his way. It’s less of a moral dilemma for Kratos, and more of a ‘we don’t know enough to make a judgement’. Atreus, we can tell at the beginning of the game, is going to eventually make Kratos more sympathetic, more caring towards other beings. Perhaps even more benevolent than any of the Aesir Norse gods, save Tyr. Though, that isn’t exactly hard.

And, then, you get further in the game. At first, you understand: Kratos is a dick to Atreus. He didn’t care to spend time with him while his mother was alive, and it shows. He refuses to tell Atreus he is a god, and that he is a god in turn, and the conflict of his body and mind being conflicted in what he truly is ends up being the reason for Atreus’ ongoing illness. It’s Kratos’ fault, and sure, he doesn’t know this until it’s nearly too late and he fixes it, but even so. All Atreus wants is to be loved and to make his father proud.

Until later, when he finds out he is a god and goes full diva. The game made me feel about Atreus the same way as I’m sure many parents feel about their children—though, full disclaimer, I’m not a parent, so don’t @ me. My friend says you always love them, and you want what’s best for them and make allowances for them, but oh my god sometimes you really don’t like them. This definitely happened with Atreus. From telling Sindri, one of our dwarf friends, that he is sick of dealing with ‘little people problems’ and making him sad, to saying to Kratos that they are gods and so can do whatever they like, dash the consequences to anyone, to killing a son of Thor against Kratos’ wishes for pure vengeance, made me question my role as a father. Even the little mutterings of ‘whatever’ whenever Kratos wants him to shoot an arrow at a target and one point in the game had me breathing out some mutterings of my own: ‘little shit’ and ‘goddamn I hate you’ were frequent curses.

And yet, by the end of the game I liked him again. Why? It wasn’t his fault. It was his conflicting body and mind; perhaps even the ‘trickery’ side of Loki was finally coming out. Maybe he was going a little mad with all the voices in his head. Plus, he saved my arse so many times in battle with his crazy shock arrows that I needed him. What? I didn’t say I was a perfect parent.

You know what’s really impressive? How this game makes Kratos a likeable character. In previous games (which, full disclosure, I never played) he seemed to be a vengeful man with no thought to anything but his own rage. Now, he has something more to live for—his son, and to honour the memory of his beloved wife. You really understand why he does the things he does. You believe he is trying to be a better person. You know the one thing he really wants to do is scatter his wife’s ashes, and will stop at nothing to fulfil her wishes. You may say he’s stupid for not wanting to tell Atreus the truth, but not only is he ashamed, but he also knows that Atreus may mirror his actions. This brings a duality to the secret that is so interesting that at times I wondered whether Kratos should tell Atreus, considering they don’t have the best relationship in the first place. The dichotomy between Kratos and Atreus is brilliant, and serves not just to humanise Kratos, but also fully makes me believe in their rocky bond as father and son. They are real, and honest, and the perfect grounding to such a profound adventure.

The rollercoaster of a narrative journey GOW took me through was nothing short of outstanding. And that’s even before we get into the Norse lore.

 A Norse’s Life for Me

The conflict between Atreus and Kratos mirrors a theme that runs throughout the entire game throughout the franchise: that of a son killing his father, god against god. And this extends to the version of the Norse lore GOW has created. Favors and story quests alike see the struggle between children and their parents, and it is incredibly satisfying to see Kratos and Atreus overcome that and start to become ‘better’.

As lore that I wasn’t very familiar with, save the depictions of Thor, Odin and Loki from the Marvel universe, it was fascinating to hear the stories from Mimir, the hilarious disembodied head, and to glean them from the lore markers dotted around the realms. It was a great idea to do this from the point of view of Kratos, who does not know the lore and cannot read the language, and Atreus, who has an affinity of language and has been told many stories by his native mother. It’s a natural means of storytelling without it turning into a boring exposition dump. And who doesn’t love story time while rowing around the Lakes of Nine? Apart from Atreus at the beginning, I guess, when his only storyteller was straight-talking Kratos. Spoiler alert: his stories aren’t great.

 Monster Visuals

Rowing across the Lake of Nine is when the story really opens up, bad stories or no. It’s here where you see the true beauty of the story through the stunning appearance of the World Serpent, who is as colossal as the name suggests, though not as scary. From there, using Tyr’s Temple (probably the best Aesir god out there), Kratos and Atreus slowly unlock the various realms, from the fiery homeland of the fire giants, Muspelheim, to the green-tinged Norse underworld, Helheim. Each realm has their own aesthetic, their own monsters, and their own story. While Midgard is bound to be most players’ favourite, due to how much bigger it is and its role as the central point of all the realms, my second favourite is Alfheim, land of the light and dark elves. As the first one to visit after Midgard, its purple hues, sparkling waters and chirping critters make it seem like a mystical world of potential. The fact that the elves are in constant war, doomed to continue for as long as both races live, is both desolate and a fact of life. Even an apparent paradise is rife with issues, and yet beauty can still be found in the worst of situations. 

The realms are very cool, though if I were still in massive open world/RPG mindset, as I so often were, I’d wish that Niflheim and Muspelheim were more than just extra challenges. It would be cool if there were story-led reasons to go there, rather than leaving it to chance if the player gets there in the first place by finding their language cyphers.

The way the camera works doesn’t just give the incredible graphics the time they deserve, but also artfully serves the emotional highs and lows the story wants to hit. It gently guides you to some of the most awe-inspiring events, such as when a giant shows up or when you are fighting a being twice your size, to reflect the intensity as well as making sure you don’t miss them. But the best use of it is at some of the most tense and poignant moments of the game, such as when Kratos is reflecting on his mistakes and travelling to save his son. The camera doesn’t leave his face for lengthy periods, and this, along with the haunting crescendo of siren-like voices singing in accompaniment, really makes you understand what he is feeling, even though no words are said. You are forced to sit with him in silence and in relief. In pain and in quiet. It’s profound. I love it.

The visuals also shine in true GOW fashion: in battle. The place in which this really stands out is in the battle with Baldur at the end, when Freya is trying her utmost to intervene by animating the colossal corpse of a dead giant. While I thought this battle wasn’t as hard as I thought it would be, it didn’t actually matter to me in the end as much as it did in other games such as Final Fantasy XV. The battleground kept changing, Baldur’s powers shifting between ice and fire was really interesting as it meant Kratos having to change his own weapons as needed, Baldur’s increasing insanity and glee at the fight, and—best of all—the giant was always in the background, being impressive and foreboding. Awesome.

 The Art of War

The combat in GOW is some of the best I’ve ever experienced. I’m quite used to the hack and slash of RPGs, where the name of the game is simply to hold down R1 and wait for the cool combo moves to bloom out of the angsty protagonist. Okay, fine, it’s never that simple. But in God of War, almost every move counts, especially in the boss battles. Learning to trip monsters, discovering which ones will fall and which ones will not, where their weak points are, and navigating flying or digging enemies means that a lot of the battles mix it up every time. The skill trees that branch off as you upgrade your Leviathan Axe and Atreus’ Talon Bow makes that combat even more visually impressive with chained combos and other ways to fight. This system doesn’t give you as much freedom as many other games, though. Eventually, you’ll get enough experience to unlock every skill, and you’ll want to. Each one will help you in a fight. This is great in a way as I truly felt powerful by the end, and wasn’t worried about neglecting a skill for another, but means the combat is more linear than it could be. Maybe this is necessary as you have to think about combat in other, potentially smarter ways anyway.

Later in the game, you don’t just have to think of the attacks, but you also have to think of the elements of the monsters you are fighting. Do I want to use the ice-imbued axe that spins perfectly in the air and comes back like Mjolnir comes back to Thor? Not in Helheim I don’t, where the monsters are hardcore Ice Queen Elsa stans. Damn, I’m used to using that thing. Alright, time to break out the fiery Blades of Chaos, which you only get halfway through the game but old players will definitely get excited over like a member-berry in heat. Unless you are fighting volcanic draugrs, that is.

The fighting is made even more exciting with the brutality of pressing R3 once an enemy is stunned enough to be grabbed. The animations have Mortal Kombat-esque levels of gore, and as Kratos is an absolute beast, it’s believable as well as disgustingly fun. Want some extra stunnage? Then remember to use Atreus’ arrows, which can interrupt and stun even the biggest of beasts. He saved me more times than I can count. It’s one of the best uses of a sidekick character I’ve ever seen. Why? It’s not just the very useful skills he has, but crucially, HE CAN’T DIE. With memories of a well-intentioned but suicidal Lydia running in front of my sword and taking a fatal wound in the middle of an overpopulated dungeon, this is brilliant. Thanks, Skyrim. Plus, can you imagine having to be Kratos mourning over his dead son every time they lose in battle? Bit morbid, even for a game with this much gore and emotional impact.

Brok and Sindri aren’t just there to crack jokes and bring life into the world. They are also master blacksmiths who work on your Axe, Blades, and armour. The levelling up system is quite different from other traditional games—EXP doesn’t level you up as soon as you get it, but you can use the EXP to buy or upgrade armour, enchantments and talisman that, when worn altogether, give you an overall level. The simple act of replacing a level 7 chest plate with one that’s level 3 can lower your overall level from a 6 to a 5, making you less able to deal with those pesky high-level enemies. As such, it’s a massive variable, and one that players need to consider seriously not just as the game progresses, but also from battle to battle. Runes that you can slot in your armour can increase your frost or burn damage, increase your resistance to ailments, improve your runic attacks, give you extra burst of skills on hits or kills, or even more specific advantages. Some that I found most helpful were 5% less damage from Valkyries which, if you’ve fought one, you know how much of a game changer it can be!

This necessitation for learning the combat and doing it well means that the satisfaction level of defeating a big old boss who you’ve been dying to for the last hour is at well over 9000 (I’m looking at you, Valkyries screaming Valhalla! at me every three seconds). And, now I’m confident enough with it, that means I’ll be continuing with the post-game combat challenges for just a little while longer. This, combined with the beautiful graphics, gripping story, anti-hero and loveable side characters, the revolution of Kratos to multi-dimensional character, and a world brimming with lore and knowledge, makes this game one to remember. 

WARNING: (not full) spoilers below.

‘We did it darliiiings!’

That’s what I cried, a-la the Great Sylvando, once I finished this game. 112 hours in, and all the way through it showed no signs of slowing. Which, for a shameless JRPG-lover like myself, is exactly what I want in a game. Hours and hours of combat, exploration through stunning scenery, empathetic and deep characters and, most importantly, a completely immersive and entertaining story that I can’t wait to see the climax—but, crucially, I can.

The Chosen One

The story begins in Erdrea, where monsters have invaded the fantastical world—why, we’re not quite sure. All we know, as the infant protagonist, is that we are found washed up on the riverbank by a kindly old man named Chalky, who takes us to his village and gives us to our adoptive mother, Amber.

And, guess what? He’s the Chosen One—the Luminary. You’d have thought our hero would have realised something was different about him with the presence of a very specific birthmark tattooed on the back of his hand, but he and his childhood friend Gemma do come from a sheltered town with very little knowledge of the outside world, after all. True to form for a lot of adventure games, he’s the only one who can save the world. After finding this out in a coming-of-age ceremony a few years later, Amber tells him to go to King Carnelian of Heliodor, who is sure to help him understand what all this means. Right?

If our silent protagonist could talk, this is where he would be screaming, ‘I’m not the Darkspawn!’ as King Carnelian throws him in the dungeon. But thank Yggdrasil he did, or we wouldn’t meet our first companion in our band of loveable misfits.

The Power of Friendship

I’m still unsure why, after so many hours of gameplay, why Erik endears himself the most to me, but he does. Sure, he’s the first one you meet, and you team up to escape the dungeon (running from a giant dragon along the way!), but he’s also a dishonest thief. Throughout the game, you never quite know if he’s in it for himself or to help you save the world. I’ve concluded that he’s actually doing it for you, and your budding bromance…or, at least, that’s my own head cannon. He’s misunderstood. His cutting sarcasm is welcome in a story of overly keen optimists (see: Sylvando). And he’s who the hero seems to look at whenever there’s a sweet, sentimental moment in the story, cementing their true friendship.

Or, maybe it’s because Akira Toriyama drew these characters, and his colourful hair and spunky attitude remind me of my childhood DBZ crush, Trunks. Either way, I’m Team Erik, with his knife-wielding, quick-thinking style of fighting, all the way. My only gripe is that his damage wasn’t that great for me until endgame, unfortunately.

Even though we don’t meet Sylvando until later, it seems that my mind demands he be the next to discuss—much like Sylvando demands much of the attention within the game. We first meet him at the circus, where he is a beloved performer. His quest is to make the people of the world smile—a noble endeavour in a world where the Dark One is coming to rid the world of happiness for good. He is the absolute epitome of flamboyance: he calls your band of companions ‘darlings’; he has a half-naked ship captain with bulging muscles and a pink face mask called Dave, of all things; and he even leads a peacock-feathered parade at a certain point in the game, which the hero must cheerily join in, feathers and sassy sway absolutely necessary.

And yet, he doesn’t simply function as comic relief. He is brave, charming, sympathetic, and quite often the heart of the group. He is always the one to ask if a character is okay, or if they need help, and has conviction that only Henrik, our resident knight in shining armour, would rival. Plus, he’s fantastic with a whip (because of course he is) and has some fabulous healing moves that have saved me more than once in a tough fight. The group would be nothing without Sylvando—and he absolutely knows it!

Veronica & Serena serve as our other characters who are bound by destiny. They are Keepers, born to protect aid the Luminary on his quest. As twins, you’d expect them to look the same…but, after an encounter with monsters, Veronica was turned into a child, and is stuck that way. As an offensive mage who hates being treated like a child, she serves as the brash one of the group, quick to anger, much like her fiery spells.

Serena, on the other hand, serves as the yin to Veronica’s yang. She is temperate and always willing to help, if somewhat hapless. The primary healer of the group, she excels in restorative and defensive magic, and has a harp to while away the less hopeful days. As a pair, these two are steadfast, loyal, and…to be honest, aren’t much more interesting than that, unless Veronica is being goaded into an argument.

Until the later game, anyway. I won’t spoil that here, but will just say I underestimated both their spell casting abilities and their importance in the story. 

You know how the hero is the Chosen One, the Luminary and the absolute saviour of the world? Well, he also happens to be a Prince of Dundrasil. Had the fates been kinder, he might have been brought up in a huge castle, with loving royal family around to raise and guide him.

Rab, a fierce, playful and wise old man (with a banging Scottish accent) is ready to heal, attack with offensive magic, and guide our hero around the expansive world. And, as we find out after defeating him and his sexy companion in a battle competition in Octagonia (see: Jade), he is also grandfather to our hero, and thus a Lord of Dundrasil himself. He may seem old, but not only does he have royal blood, but he is a capable spell-caster and martial artist, making it apparent that he is one of the most capable companions in the game. If I were to ask anyone for advice, knowing that he would neither mince his words nor omit anything important, I would go to Rab.

You know what any game directed at kids needs? That’s right, a sexy warrior princess that you can stick in a bunny costume for most of the game. Even if you choose not to do that, her combat outfit doesn’t leave much to the imagination.

Thankfully, Jade isn’t just eye-candy. She has far more going for her. She’s a Princess of Heliodor, the hero’s childhood companion who lost him as a baby. She just wants to find him, her younger brother figure (sadly), and help him fulfil his destiny. Plus, as a battle and spear fighter, she has some of the strongest moves in the game—albeit mostly from her sexy, love-based moves such as ‘Hip Thrust’ and ‘Sexy Beam’, only comparable with Sylvando’s equally as sexy and flamboyant ‘Lashings of Love’ and ‘That’s Amore’ moves. She’s a badass bitch who takes no crap from lovestruck men or monsters.

Though, she has her very own Princess Leia moment, where she is captured by a horrific, giant, evil and ugly monster and made to wear a sexy outfit (hey, there’s that bunny girl outfit again). It is heavily implied she has been under his mind control, and that he’s been having his ‘wicked way’ with her. Good thing she comes out of it with sexy vampire powers, isn’t it?

HEAVY SPOILERS NOW. I warn you, don’t go any further if you care about that kind of thing.

Our final companion is one who doesn’t show up until late game. Sir Henrik, a Knight of Heliodor, is the hero we all need. He defends his ruler to the last (which, spoiler alert, nearly ended up being his fatal flaw), is willing to sacrifice himself for the good of all, and defends the weak: a true knight, with chivalry, bravery, and total care for all others. It’s a shame he hated the hero for the first half of the game, really.

But do I care about that? No, I care that his greatsword abilities make him an absolute tank. On a one-on-one fight, I needed him front and centre of every battle just for his incredible damage output. Against multiple enemies, he is less useful, but with his supplementary healing and defence skills, he isn’t just an attacker, but a true defender of the people to the last.  

Calm it with the Combat

My god, this game has a lot of battles. While that’s expected for a turn-based JRPG, and there were a lot, unlike others such as Pokémon, you can choose which battles to avoid as the figures traverse the overworld. This is useful in such a slow-burning game, and also helps you find the monsters you want—again, a definite improvement on the way Pokémon works, as it saves you having to fight hundreds of creatures you don’t want to find the ones with the best EXP.

A notable exception to this is when you have to find and defeat a rare monster for a quest, which don’t traverse the overworld. This means you have to fight potentially hundreds of more common monsters to find the one you want, which can be frustrating, especially as it is all done on chance and not on how many you have defeated. While you can increase your chances with various items or equipment, it still adds a frustrating amount of time to an already long game.

Another vague annoyance is how much harder the game gets post-game. I actually did not have an issue with this, as a friend told me how to farm the elusive and high-EXP metal slimes using a particular Hero-Erik-Jade Pep Power and so I could use this ability throughout post-game. However, for those not in the know, the potentially grinding at the end of the game may put some people off finishing an already saturated game.

What I loved about the combat was how it kept getting harder and harder. I never worried about over-levelling (as said above, I was more worried about being under levelled) and that meant I could do what I do best: do all side-quests before the end of the main story. In other JRPGs, the completionist in me has always made me want to do all side-quests, but this has meant the final boss has been underwhelming and easier than it should be.

The variation of powers and attacks was also really interesting. You can spec into different forms of fighting for each character—I went for Swords with the hero, Whips for Sylvando, Boomerangs with Erik (after using Daggers for most of the game), Heavy Wands for Rab and Veronica, Wands for Serena, Spears for Jade, and Greatswords for Henrik—and this makes all the combinations of them in the party very cool. I normally just controlled the hero during the fights and let the others fight wisely, unless there was a specific quest to fulfil or a particularly hard boss. Not only did this speed up combat, but it also helped me to learn which of their moves were the most effective against which monsters automatically and quickly, which was easier than picking moves and trying them out myself. It’s easy, with enough gold, to respec if you like, and this I’m sure could make the game fee different every time if you wanted to play with different specs.

Pep powers were also a lot of fun. While it was sometimes annoying waiting for some or all of the characters to pep up and therefore use these moves that combine different characters’ moves for ‘Ultimate’ attacks, they provided fun cutscenes and made the battles more interesting. Plus, they reminded me a lot of DBZ moves, especially the epic ones with the hero and Rab!

Top tip: you can swap out characters and they will keep their pepped-up status. I wish I’d known about that a lot earlier!

The monster designs are great, as per usual Akira Toriyama style. There are lots of different kinds, from slimes, to mechs, to really weird ones like the kissy lip monster and the Bongo Drongos. The bosses are also amazing. Just all the character designs, from human to monster, to anything else. I see a lot of DBZ in all of them, which is fantastic.

You know what? Here’s some pictures. You’re welcome.

Mini Games & Challenges: Hey, I actually want to do these!

I often have issues with mini games, as sometimes they are so different from the main game that I just don’t want to spend time playing them. Gwent in another of my favourite games, The Witcher 3 is a good example: I never really learnt the rules, which I’m sure would have helped, but it was so detached from the main game I just didn’t care. Plus, it had no effect on the story or game at large, so what was the point?

In DQ11, sure, you don’t need to rack up 500,000 casino tokens in poker or the slots to buy better gear. You don’t have to finish first in all five Gallopolis horse races. Forging items isn’t totally needed to advance the game. It’s not necessary to win all five rounds of the Wheel of Harma in a certain number of moves (though this is much more like the rest of the game than the other mini games). But I did all of these, and it was great fun. It’s what’s helped make the game such a time suck (especially the casino) but I never felt like they were a chore.

Apart from the crossbow bullseyes. I did none of them as apparently I only noticed about three out of however many there are. They can suck my Sword of Light.  

 What’s a good JRPG without me questioning the point of life after it’s over?

JRPGs do it best—fight me.

The story of DQ11 is immersive, interesting, intricate and, at times, incredibly heart-breaking. Following the hero and his friends for over 100 hours really means you get to dive into their adventure, and more so, their relationships. You truly believe why they have chosen to follow each other into danger, to protect each other as well as the world. Sure, he’s the Luminary, so Serena & Veronica, the Luminary’s guides, at least have a reason to follow him to the end. The fact he’s the Luminary at may mean the characters have more faith in him than they would anyone else without lightning powers. But, even without that, you get the impression that they trust him for his innocent and yet resolute determination to do the right thing, whatever the cost.

The NPCs in the game also provide variety and are a lot of fun. There’s a lovesick mermaid, a brilliantly incompetent prince, two brothers in Laguna di Gondolia who are trying to sell the same things to you for different prices, and Silvando’s Smile Brigade, to name just a few. Their backstories, personalities and current stories all bring life to a game already chock full of it, and makes even simple fetch quests interesting and well worth doing, if you value a good story like I do. These little touches explain why the game clocks in at well over 100+ hours, but at the same time gives true justification to why that is. It’s the difference between a boring game, and one I loved to turn on and just relax of an evening. I might not have done all that much in three hours, but I still enjoyed every minute.

With everything considered, I will remember DQ11 fondly as one of my favourite JRPGs to date. The storyline, characters, combat and score are all fantastic and makes me wish I played the older games. Thank you, Dragon Quest, for giving me 112 hours of fun. 

Having never played a Final Fantasy game before, it was interesting starting up the game to read: “A Final Fantasy for fans and first-timers.” With the franchise’s first game released in 1987, I was interested in picking it up so late in its lengthy history, and in all honesty the fact that the Japanese video game developer Square Enix developed the game was a large part of the reason I picked it up, as I’ve admired their beautiful graphics and vastly superior character realism ever since Life is Strange and their take over of the Tomb Raider franchise. And I’m so glad I did: it was phenomenal.

Characters

The strength of the game lies in the incredible bond that is established over the course of the game between the four main protagonists. You are Noctis Lucis Caelum (‘Noct’), a Lucian Prince and heir apparent to the Lucian throne, who must travel across the realm to reunite with and marry your childhood friend Lady Lunafreya, the Oracle, to forge an alliance between Lucis and Niflhiem of Eos.

On your journey to Altissia, you are accompanied by your three closest friends who never leave your side. Gladiolus (‘Gladio’) is your lifelong friend and bodyguard who has sworn to protect the kind at all costs, the typical tough guy quick to anger but who can be surprisingly sweet; this is particularly apparent when they are around his little sister, Iris, and to Ignis, particularly in the later game (I will explain this later – massive spoiler). He calls Ignis ‘Iggy’ most of the time, which is a really cute nickname to come from such a tough man and to give to someone as respectable as Ignis.

Ignis is the brains of the group who looks after his friends, driving the Regalia and cooking them nutritious meals, having looked after a young Noct in their childhood. He is also now Noct’s Royal Advisor, which makes sense once I realised that but during the game I just thought Noct was referring questions back to Ignis merely because he was the smartest rather than someone actually employed to help in such a way. I particularly like the exchange between Ignis and Gladio at regular intervals when you discover a new ingredient:

“That’s it!” “What’s up, Iggy?” “I’ve come up with a new recipe.” (pronounced “recipehh”) “I can taste test for ya.”

Very sweet.

Lastly, Prompto is the hilarious jokester of the group, always trying to make light of a situation and have a good time. He is also quite insecure, and so quite a few times he asks Noct pretty heartbreaking questions like “Were you worried about me?” and talks about having no friends in his childhood. At all times like this I made sure to support him, where the conversation options meant that the moody Noct could have brushed him off or been downright mean to him. Considering Prompto is his only school friend, a commoner rather than one of his royal entourage, I think their relationship is particularly special.

In fact, the whole of FFXV is incredibly sentimental, mostly driven through the banter of the four boys throughout the game, even when just exploring the open world, as if they are going on a road trip with their best friends rather than undertaking life threatening missions to save the world. This includes sitting around the campfire together every night where you can see them chatting and hanging out by the firelight, and little optional cutscenes and quests where Gladio asks Noct to train with him, Ignis wants him to help prepare breakfast, or when Prompto needs a bit of a boost to feel needed in their little group. Every moment of FFVX takes a moment to the 4 friends’ personalities. I feel like I know so much about these boys and care about them all. I am more familiar with them and empathise with them more than I think I ever have with any other video game characters, and this is because every time they travel together, be that in a side quest or a road trip, little things come out about their lives and you can really tell how much they rely on and protect each other. This is amplified with Prompto’s photography skills, which allows him to take around 10 photos that can be viewed every time you rest at camp or in lodgings, allowing you to capture the most epic moments in their journey and which became more and more valuable to me the further into the story I got and the more attached I got to the characters. This deep friendship made the ending, for me, so much more heartbreaking (spoilers later on when I chat about the ending).

Saying all this, the characters outside of the immediate friendship group don’t get as much of a look in at all – even Lunafreya, the Oracle and Noct’s bride to be, or Iris, Gladio’s sister, or Aldyn, another crucial character (spoilers – see below!). Other than the fact that they spent time together as children, I feel like I know nothing about Luna’s backstory – I don’t know why she and Noct were separated, how she became the Oracle, or literally anything about her other than she loves Noct (though even this is debatable!) and that she can talk to the gods. And that’s by the end of the game! Watching Kingsglaive: Final Fantasy XV helped with this, but really I shouldn’t need to watch a film in order to understand the plot of a separate game, even if it is in the same franchise. In regards to Aldyn, I had to actually look up his backstory to know the motivations behind his actions, and all I know about Iris is that she is fond of Noct and has a good relationship with her brother. There’s also a crucial (apparently) character called Cor Leonis, who is the King’s Lord Commander and helps you along the way, but I had completely forgotten about him halfway through the game and was confused when he returns just before you board the boat to Altissia. I really appreciate that the bromance of the four comes before the romance between Noct and Luna – a welcome change from most storylines where the love story takes precedence – but even so, I feel like more cutscenes are needed to properly explain the background of all of these characters in order to get a more in-depth story throughout.

Combat

Many other RPGs, and really all types of games, have loosely related characters to stand by the side of the protagonist, but are never really developed as much as the main character; you feel like the protagonist could hold his or her own if these support characters went off for a bit. But there are several times in the story where one or more of the characters have to go on their own missions or are separated from the rest of the group, and I really felt that I wasn’t as powerful or supported than when the whole gang were together. All four are crucial to the story, and all four bring their own necessary aspects to a battle. Ignis can heal, Gladio is strong with a load of HP to stay alive long enough to help bring down those particularly difficult enemies, and Prompto can shoot accurately from any range and it only depletes one section of the tech bar, giving Noct time to get out of a tough spot at frequent points in the battle.

In fact, having your allies with you means that you can perform other Link Strikes as well as character techniques in battle, all of which will bring your Finesse score up at the end of each encounter. These are performed by having a member of your party near you, either by parrying or by attacking an enemy from behind, called a Blindside Link Attack.  These are really useful, as not only can it get you out of being completely overwhelmed by a bunch of creatures using your buddy to outmanoeuvre them, but they are also more powerful than your standard moves, meaning that you are more likely to get out of the fray unscathed.

While many believe that the combat is quite simple, as attacking and blocking are as simple as holding down buttons, Noct’s own abilities make battle a lot more exciting. He can warp (teleport), either to high-up vantage points to get out of the immediate battle and restore MP (Magic Points), to improve speed and agility in the battlefield, or to Warp-Strike enemies, which increases damage done (more so the further you are from the enemy) and uses MP. The weapons are great, and Noct can have 4 equipped at any one time for easy weapon changes. It’s great that you can give powerful weapons to your team, and they fight and change their moves and weapons very intelligently, and seem like they’re often your equals in battle with their abilities to take down enemies and bring each other back from the brink of death.

However, the Royal Arms, or Armiger Weapons, which Noct collects through quests and various locations throughout Eos, while powerful are a real hindrance in my opinion. They’re a cool addition as Noct has to seek out ancient tombs of past kings from his lineage to collect them, but they drain your HP steadily and so should be handled with care. Personally, I don’t use them as I have found that other weapons are just as powerful, and the reduced HP is annoying, especially when fighting the tougher beasts that can take you down in one hit.  

Spells are also well worth having in one of your weapon slots. While they seem limited as: you can only cast in the realms of Fire, Ice and Thunder; there is a cool down, limiting the amount of times you can use your spells; and in order to craft the spells in Elemancy you need to find elemental deposits or take down specific enemies to absorb the energy to use. However, they are definitely worth it as they can do mass amounts of damage to several opponents, and you can also mix and match the spells when you craft them to be a mixture of two or of all three, and you can add items to give extra perks such as allowing the user to heal or to poison the target. The only issue with the spells are that, when you cast them, chances are your buddies will also be in range. While this put them out of action for five seconds or so whilst they twitch on the ground from electrocution or shiver after being blasted by your Blizzard attack, they still seem to hold their own and get back into the fray in a jiffy. In order to avoid this completely, try to get Ignis to Regroup and heal everyone so that they are out of the way when you then cast a spell afterwards.

The weapons and spells are used in conjunction with an interesting feature I’ve never seen before, which they dub ‘Wait Mode’. When an enemy has spotted you, as long as you have Wait Mode on, the game freezes and the Wait Timer starts to go down, where you can focus on one enemy and learn what their weaknesses are. For bigger monsters this can take quite a long time, but it’s worth the payoff of knowing what spells or types of weapon are effective or weak against particular enemies – for the more powerful ones, having an effective weapon really cuts down the time you are spent fighting the enemy, especially as the really big enemies take ages to take down with or without an advantage. This makes some of the weapons’ secondary effects, such as Thunder or Fire damage, particularly hard to navigate, as a creature with a weakness to greatswords but an advantage against fire would have a neutral weakness to the weapon, which means you might have to change your Blade of Brennaere to something else. I only had one problem with Wait Mode, and only had to turn it off once in my play through of the game – I had to warp up to a specific ladder in a dungeon and make sure to stay up there until the battle had ended, as the warp spots only appear in combat (a poor design choice, IMO). The problem was, staying stationary to make sure I didn’t fall off the scaffolding meant that Wait Mode kept cropping up and pausing the combat as I wasn’t actively fighting the daemons present. It was a rare moment, but brought up a couple of issues particularly with warping – without warping to this ladder in combat, there was no way I could get to this spot without allowing the daemons to respawn by leaving the dungeon and calling the enemies back with my whistle.

Lastly, I found that items were invaluable in battle, especially as you can encounter some very high level creatures very early on (I had to run away from a Level 54 Midgardsormr when I was below level 20!), or even some that are a lower level than you but can still take out with one hit. I always made sure I had Hi-Potions, which restore your HP, Elixirs, which restore not only your MP and HP but also allowed you to regain your Max HP, which could deplete and not return until after the dungeon or encounter had finished, and Phoenix Downs, which restore you to life with full health once knocked out of the battle. This depletion of Max HP was very annoying, and I still don’t know why it goes down in some battles and not others, so if anyone could shed light on this that would be amazing.

The Experience

As with most Square Enix games I’ve played, the scenery and animation is absolutely stunning. The people are beautiful – as a heterosexual girl, I found all of the boys gorgeous, as well as many of the secondary characters, especially as they’re anime and thus naturally good-looking – and, as I’ve said before, I’ve found that Square Enix have always done the most realistic character animations. I also didn’t mind driving around in the Regalia on lengthy trips, even though others complained that this essentially created unnecessarily long loading screens as you don’t need any skill to drive the car. The horizon and the beautiful sunsets and the incredible beasts and stretches of countryside to explore made me want to go on the long drives (although after a while, the fast travel did become useful when I wanted to get somewhere quickly).

This brings me onto travel: in general, this is quite tricky at the beginning as it is dangerous at night, and I had to make sure I knew I was near a campsite (haven) or outpost so that I wasn’t caught out in the middle of the night by daemons ready to attack you. After night falls, Ignis refuses to drive, and even if Noct takes over, quite often you are pulled over by a level 30 Iron Giant or the like in the middle of the road, creaking out of the floor, and so when you’re first starting out the only option is to take to foot and go in the other direction. Not helpful if you want to get anywhere at all, as even off road daemons are likely to find you. After you reach level 30, Ignis is willing to drive, but the dangers still stand.

Furthermore, once you reach the Chocobo outpost, you get an adorable bird creature, sort of like a fluffy ostrich, which you can rent by the day and ride over the rough terrain that doesn’t allow your Regalia to encroach. They’re great (and adorable), as they’re much faster than travelling by foot, and after levelling it up a bit, it starts to have increased stamina, higher jumping capabilities, and even learns techniques to use in battle, such as giving the team a stat boost or kicking a monster in the face for you. You can also race them for medals against the three other boys, and it’s adorable at camp when Noct sleeps on his Chocobo in front of the fire. However, you have to make sure that your Chocobo rental period lasts if you’re planning to go out into the open world far away from roads and your Regalia. It is so frustrating to embark on a quest and then have to run across the never ending plains, Noct’s stamina running out every 10 seconds unless you hit the L3 at just the right time. Be prepared.

The music is also brilliant, and aims to (and succeeds at!) really affecting you emotionally. You can tell that the soundtrack is trying to make something exciting, scary, action-packed, or devastating when necessary, and the music gets particularly exciting when you fight a creature that is particularly big, powerful, and downright epic. This most often occurs in the ‘boss’ battles in dungeons, but I was also recently fighting a giant buffalo-like creature called a Kujata, for example, and the epic music came into play, which really makes it feel like you’re defeating something special. Although, it was funny in Gladio’s random sidequest where he wants the perfect cup of noodles, and so you have to fight a giant lobster for its meat – such epic music seemed a bit out of place in such an unimportant sidequest (though I’m sure Gladio would disagree) but I found it amusing.  

When you stay at havens, you get to sample Ignis’ very appetising-looking meals, the recipes of which he makes out of gathering ingredients and putting them together to make something delicious, or by viewing or trying food other cooks have made. These are great, as they give various boosts to Noct and his friends for their adventures the next day, and can often make a difference between spending hours fighting foes and using up your whole stock of potions and elixirs, and defeating them easier with increased attack, HP, magic, resistance to poison, or a whole other manner of effects that come from eating that delicious grilled trout that Noct caught the other day.

There are a lot of similarities with another game that I have reviewed in the past: The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. This mostly comes from both games being an open-world RPG of course, and the fact that I loved Skyrim was always going to be an important step into also loving FFXV, but honestly I loved this game even more than Skyrim due to the sentimentality and the characters, despite the rushed linearity of the story after chapter 8. I agree with critics that it finished far too quickly, but the storyline was so epic, so heartbreaking, that I loved it… more about that later (spoilers below). Another factor that both games share was their technique levelling system. While Skyrim simply calls theirs Skills and Perks, FFXV calls it Ascendance, which I feel is fitting for the game as the whole journey centres around Noct ascending to his rightful place as King. By gaining AP points from resting at camp, travelling for long periods of time, having successful conversations, and by defeating enemies, you can use these points to improve certain skills, such as Techniques, Combat, Exploration, Teamwork, and Recovery, which affect all four of the boys. While this is useful depending on how you want to play the game, giving you a sense of autonomy, it can also be stressful if you aren’t sure which skills would be best to improve and thus how to use your points wisely.

Creatures

I’ve already talked about the adorable Chocobos which you can rent to ride around the landscape, but there are hundreds of other creatures that roam the world in the wild, which are all fascinating and beautifully designed. All across the world you have a different assortment of creatures of various levels, from cat-like creatures, to rhinos, to giraffe-deer hybrids, to creatures you can barely describe, such as the giant Catoblepas, which tower above you in a lovely lake near Alstor Slough and sport pig-like faces and giant necks like diplodocuses.

You can explore the world engaging these ‘enemies’ as you please, or go to tipsters (normally these are the ones also willing to give you food at restaurants, cafes etc) to get Bounty Hunts. These are a variety of levels which can range from the lowest to level 110 (being level 64 currently, I haven’t tried these yet!) and require you to seek out certain creatures and kill them for whatever reason, and to get a reward in return. They are similar to a side quest, but are also classified by rank. Noct starts at rank 1, and the more bounties he undertakes, the more he can undertake – you cannot do a certain bounty hunt by the tipster at Hammerhead until you are rank 4, for example. These are fun, and allow you to find creatures all over Lucis that you may have overlooked, to explore some of the areas you may have also missed, and also results in opening up some creatures to combat that wouldn’t have engaged you before (such as the Catoblepas).

The other creatures that roam Eos can also be fought in Bounty Hunts, but only come out at night. These are daemons – the creatures of the dark that Noct and his friends must defeat in order to save the realm and keep the light in the world. As you go through the game, the nights get longer as the daemons get more powerful, and they are particularly active in dungeons (where, annoyingly, you cannot save!). They are particularly annoying creatures, and some are very powerful, knocking you out with one hit.  

There are also the MTs – Magitek Troopers – and soldiers that fight for the Imperials. The Imperials are Niflhiem’s army that seek to take over Lucis and the whole realm of Eos. They follow you around in giant airships and try to attack you throughout the game, which can get really annoying if you’re trying to do some sidequests and they keep getting in the way. Thankfully, you can simply sprint as fast as you can away and normally you can get away from them, but they’re also useful to get EXP out of, and aren’t too tough to take down, until you get further into the game that is and level 45 assassins and MA-Xs (big robots) come to destroy you.

  The Storyline (WARNING: spoilers ahead!)

Now to what I really wanted to talk about: the storyline, and in particular, the ending.

I spent a lot of time in the first few chapters doing the sidequests, as that’s what I like doing in an open world game – I hate leaving quests, and so I took my sweet time, exploring and having a great time around Eos. But as the game progresses, things start going down. And I really mean down!

The characters become more developed, for a start. What began as a journey for four closer-than-close friends (that’s not an innuendo…but very well could be with how close they are!) starts to sour, particularly after the massive battle with the Leviathan, and the death of Lunafreya.

After this point, Noct becomes even more moody and angsty than normal (quite understandable really, considering his father and beloved had both died recently) but Gladio isn’t having that, telling Noct to stop moping around and to take his place as King to restore the light to the world. I thought this was quite harsh from Gladio, but of course, this is the stereotypical ‘tough guy’ way of dealing with pain – get angry, and get even. This was where I first started to really get emotionally invested in the game, when the threads that keep this lovely quartet together begin to unravel. Especially when you learn another reason why Gladio’s so pissed off with Noct – for caring more about himself than caring Ignis, who was blinded during the fight with the Leviathan. All of this, as well as Prompto being more subdued from then on, trying half-heartedly to raise all of their spirits with jokes but failing miserably, is so sad. Blind Ignis actually turns out to be very annoying, as there’s one bit where you can choose to leave Ignis behind when you go into the mine at Tenebrae (which I didn’t do) and Gladio makes you walk at a really slow pace to wait for Ignis. Fine, that makes sense, but it was really frustrating in game.

And who had killed Luna, to start all of this angst and infighting off? We had seen Ardyn throughout the game, as a weird shady character on the side of the Imperials but, strangely, seemingly dedicated to helping Noct out. For example, he saves the boys from one of the massive gods, Titan, and only shows his true colours when he kills Noct’s beloved. I did like the uncertainty of who the main antagonist was, although others who had actually seen the trailer beforehand said it was obvious as he was in the trailer acting like the primarily antagonist anyway. He really did play the part brilliantly, with his powers allowing him to taunt Noct in his head and to use a rift in time to cause Prompto and Ardyn to swap forms, tricking Noct into throwing Prompto off the train they are riding across Eos. This was very clever, as I didn’t see it coming – and again, threw me into greater despair at the fate of all of the boys, particularly as Prompto is the delicate one always vying for Noct’s affections and approval. It really made me want to kill Ardyn, and so along with the unnecessary death of Luna, Square Enix really succeeded in creating an effective and hateful baddie.

In regards to the linearity of the storyline, it was certainly rushed after chapter 8, but to me that made sense. People are starting to die (most importantly, the Oracle Lunafreya) and the nights are getting longer, with the daemons becoming more powerful. Ardyn is starting to show his true colours, and the gods are beginning to intervene in human affairs, at the pleas of Noct and Lunafreya. With all of these exciting and action-packed events, and with time running out to save the world, it’s not surprising that the story progresses quite rapidly. However, it is a shame you don’t get to see beautiful-looking cities such as Altissia for very long, and some not at all, in the case of Tenebrae. Some extra side quests and just some more willingness to put time into the game would have made this a whole lot better, given us some more character development in the case of Luna in Altissia, and allowed us to truly appreciate the incredible design – for Altissia truly is stunning, with canals where you can take boats across the city and stunning architecture to admire.

Furthermore, you can use Umbra, the dog that Luna and Noct have been using to communicate in a little book he takes back and forth between the two, to go back to past Lucis and complete some of the sidequests. However, at this point in time I was so into the story and I didn’t want to interrupt the flow of the events by going back in time. It felt insincere doing so, going back just to kill a few beasts or run a few errands, when so much was at stake. Besides, I’d already spent hours upon hours doing more side quests than I really should have been, levelling up quite fast, and so it would have been unwise to gain more experience lest the main story quests turn out to be too easy. While I was slightly disappointed the game’s chapters flicked through faster and faster as I wanted the game to last forever, in a way that made it exciting. The climax was coming, and I was racing towards it, hopefully getting rid of the darkness quickly to restore the former might of Lucis.

But then chapter 14 hits, and ten years have suddenly past and Noct has been in some sort of stasis being absorbed by the crystal for all this time, after being told by Bahamut that he must die in order for the darkness to be destroyed for good. He left his friends to a world overrun with daemons, millions have died and there is a perpetual darkness, leaving all to head to Hammerhead or Lestalium for refuge. This really shook me up in the game, more so than anything else. Knowing that the boys had such an intense friendship throughout the game, and then Noct had left them for so long without a trace, broke my heart. I have always hated stories that include lost time, like people being in comas or getting amnesia, and this is exactly what has happened here. Noct travels back by sea to Goldin Quay, and here he finds that everywhere is abandoned. It was a sickly feeling having to go through the restaurant and beach, one of the earliest points in the game, and finding that it was overrun with (incredibly difficult!) monsters, with everyone dead or seeking refuge elsewhere. While obviously this was very effective as it affected me so deeply, I think it would have been better to draw this bit out more and to have Noct have to go to all the corners of Lucis in order to reunite his friends who had decided to fight daemons all over the realm – ten years is a very long time, and they could have been anywhere, doing anything when Noct just happens to return. As it happens, they are around Hammerhead together, and while they don’t always fight together, they are still close. To be honest, this was better than having them grow apart, as I would have found it very sad if they had fallen out or had forgotten each other in that time. Still, it made me really look back on the more innocent times in FFXV before chapter 8 with sadness and nostalgia, as so much has gone wrong with the boys, making me grow up emotionally with them. [NB: how can a game of all things affect me so much, you ask? I’m not sure, as it’s never happened to me before, but having put over 60 hours of my life into this story it’s safe to say I grew attached!]

So after reuniting, Noct, Gladio, Ignis and Prompto prepare to confront Ardyn in Insomnia, the Crown City, where he has taken over. This is where you really appreciate the photos that Prompto has been taken throughout the game. They were becoming more lovely and sentimental anyway, as I was becoming more attached to the characters, but it is particularly appreciated when Noct chooses a particular photo to take into the final battle with him. I’m sure I’m not the only one who took in the first group photo of the boys with me, when they had fixed the Regalia right at the start. The game really makes you want to take in a photo that means something to you, and it’s lovely that a game can make you that sentimental. I’ve read some funny accounts of others who took in pictures of Chocobos or even Cup Noodles in with them, which is hilarious, especially as Luna and Noct (at the end, when they are presumably happy together in the afterlife) have the photo with them, and so having them staring lovingly at a picture of Cup Noodles is brilliant!

The final battle was somewhat easy, I think, if quite interesting as Ardyn can use your warping ability and the Armiger, as he is of the royal Lucian bloodline from years before. Honestly, this isn’t what I remember from the end game. It’s the flashback to the boys’ final night together, where they make camp and eat together just like old times. This was very emotional. Noct can barely get the words out, and after what seems like an age, eventually gets out: “You guys are the best”. I felt complete and utter devastation at this ending. Actually, I can’t believe how empty I felt when the game had finally finished. It was like I didn’t know what to do with myself, as the character I had been playing with for 60+ hours had just died, and so he couldn’t even see the world he had saved recover. In fact, we don’t even get to see the aftermath of his actions, of Lucis being restored and of the light returning, other than a sunrise. I suppose this is poetic, as Noct obviously doesn’t get to see this either as he is dead, and so the gamer shouldn’t be able to either, but it still would have been great to see the few characters that did survive and how they recover after 10 years of perpetual darkness and the horrors they have seen.

What was really disappointing was the lack of backstory and explanation of the lore throughout. Some have said that it was ‘subtly explained’ in the game, but I just got confused. What are Ardyn’s motivations for his evil actions? Why does Noct need 10 years and then wakes up in a prison? What was the backstory behind Prompto being an MT? I ended up having to look all of this up, and while it’s very interesting, it would have been good to have some cutscene flashbacks, to satisfy my curiosity – particularly in Ardyn’s case, as it would have been good to know that he was betrayed by the king thousands of years ago in order to be essentially a container for the darkness and then thrown aside, causing him to want to take out the Lucis royal bloodline in revenge. I think that’s what it all boils down to – I wanted more from this game, to make a more rounded story.

The ending was also incredibly confusing. There seems to be two viable interpretations, the first being that Gladio, Ignis and Prompto die fending off the massive army of daemons just before Noct goes to confront Ardyn in the final battle, and thus are there in the afterlife to help Noct destroy Ardyn once and for all. I choose not to believe this ending, for two reasons: firstly, that they are with Noct just before he calls on the past kings to kill him to take on Ardyn in the afterlife, and so why would they have been there, unless Noct was just imagining them there?; and secondly, I don’t want everyone to die, dammit! The other interpretation is that, when Noct parts with them, they simply live on, knowing that their friend has made the ultimate sacrifice, and that their appearance in Noct’s afterlife is simply an ethereal representation. Considering how close Noct is to all three of them, this makes sense, and dulls the emotional blow somewhat, despite Noct having to sacrifice himself. I wish they’d made it clearer – and I’d like to know what happens to the boys, if only to get closure.

If Final Fantasy XV really is a final fantasy for fans and first timers, then it definitely has become my fantasy, but not necessarily my final one. They are doing a remake of Final Fantasy VII, apparently the most loved of all the games, and so I know I’ll be one of the ones buying that as soon as it comes out. I’ve since watched the movie Kingsglaive: Final Fantasy XV, which explains some of what happened to Noct’s father and how Luna got to Altissia (but has barely any of Noct and his friends in it, sadly), and I’m very eager to watch the anime Brotherhood: Final Fantasy XV to indulge in more.

As a lifetime Pokémon fanatic, I couldn’t wait to walk into the local Game once again to pick up my very own copy of Pokémon Moon, even at 24 years old. After the explosion that was Pokémon Go causing a bigger stir than Team Rocket “blasting off again”, the shop was decked out with Poké merchandise, including hats, shirts, keyrings, and cards, and Pokémon was proved more popular than ever. And the icing on the cake? It came out on my 7 year anniversary, so my boyfriend and I could be geeky together (we would have been anyway, but hey, Poké-versary it is).

The concept is very much the same as the first Generations Red and Blue: you are given a pocketable creature from the local Pokémon Professor, and set off on an exciting adventure [with little more than a phone and backpack] from your mum. The aim, of course, is to train your cute little lizard into a mighty dragon of destruction to defeat eight gym leaders and become Pokémon Master, all whilst thwarting your rival and Teams of evil trainers along the way.

Even the basic concept of Pokémon games as outlined here is challenged right from the outset. In Sun and Moon, you move from Kanto, where Red and Blue are set, to Alola, the new Hawaii-esque region. Here you experience a whole new culture in the Pokémon universe, where instead of Gym Leaders and the Pokémon League challenge there are Trial Captains, Island Kahunas, and the Island Challenge, where trainers have to undergo all of the islands’ trials and battle Totem Pokémon, the guardians of the respective islands. Indeed, the region has a very tropical feel to it, with palm trees, warm and friendly people, and rituals that one feels would emanate typical Hawaiian practices if the world of Pokémon existed, such as worshipping the great Pokémon spirits called Tapu which protect each island and serve as deities for the islanders. This brings a fresh new feel to a franchise that could very easily become dull after over 20 years, and makes the game really stand out from its predecessors.  

The starters are what everyone gets excited about when new Pokémon game is announced – how they look, their evolutions, and their types (although they’ll always be some variety of water, fire and grass, of course). While the first few games’ starters hold a special place in my heart, probably due to the originality that the first generations could have as the franchise was so new (eh, who am I kidding, it’s nostalgia through and through), there are a couple of gems in Sun and Moon. It was a toss up between the grass/flying Rowlet and fire-based Litten, but I eventually gave into my kitten-loving self and chose the latter. Though a grass/ghost final evolution was a tough one to ignore, as that match-up is so rare and original. On a replay, that would be my pick.

But oh my Arceus, what was the water starter? It starts off cute, fine, has potential, though it looks a lot like Pokémon X and Y’s Oshawott, which also looked like some sort of clown for some reason. Then its second evolution really does look like a clown with a skirt and pompoms on its ears, and then its final evolution, while slightly better, is just a weird sensual mermaid water/fairy type. Not a fan, and once I traded it over to my game just to ensure a water Pokémon made it into my party, it’s also not that exciting to battle with either.

All in all, the starters were okay, but nothing can ever beat my lovely fave Cyndaquil. Or, you know, freaking Charizard.

The main difference between Sun and Moon is as their names suggest: while Sun is a ‘normal’ Pokémon game, insofar that during the day according to your DS it is also daytime in the game, Moon is set 12 hours behind. Having got Moon, I have to say that the time difference didn’t make as much difference as I thought it might. In Pokémon Crystal, my favourite Pokémon game of all time, playing at night meant you could catch a wide variety of Pokémon that you couldn’t during the day. In this new generation, however, the time of day didn’t seem that much different – useful if you only tend to play at a certain time during the day. So, while I was worried about getting Moon in the first place, don’t worry – though if you want an Alola Vulpix, like I did, you may want to consider getting Sun instead!

This brings me to one of the biggest pulls of the games: Alola Pokémon!

Pokémon Sun and Moon, much like Pokémon Go, obviously wanted to draw in old fans as well as new. Alola forms are Generation One Pokémon, but like we’ve never seen them before – Alolan Vulpix is now an ice type, while Alolan Marowak is a ghost/fire type, while Alolan Meowth looks slightly seductive with his dark upgrade. All-in-all, it’s a clever way to engage the older generation in the new game, although it was quite difficult predicting the type advantage if a rival trainer threatens to bring one out, as both the old and the new Alola types exist in this game, and so you’re never quite sure if you’re going to be facing the old favourite or the new Alolan Dugtrio with its luscious head of locks.

Ever since Generation VI (X and Y) the item Exp Share has reverted back to its original Generation I function, which means that if you turn it on, all of your Pokémon receive experience points (EXP) regardless of which Pokémon you are actually using to fight. While for some this feature may be very useful as it means you only need to use one Pokémon in theory to level all of them, it really messes with my OCD. I want to use all of my Pokémon, regardless of strength or type, and Exp Share negates that purpose. Also, Exp Share seems to make all of your Pokémon level at a very fast rate, meaning that towards the end of Moon I was finding that the big battles such as the Pokémon League, rival and Island Kahuna battles seemed incredibly easy compared to early games. However, this may be less a problem with the games and more the fact that I am a 24 year old adult playing a game intended for children…  

There are many more incredible and exciting new features in this game, including the Rotom Pokédex which is a Pokémon database with a Pokémon trapped inside it (a bit horrendous when you put it like that), which talks to you and also guides you around the map of the region, which is big enough to definitely get hopelessly lost in. Not only this, but there is a market in the map now so you can see where you’re meant to be going, which if you’re awful with directions like me (even in games), this is a massive advantage. The updated Pokégear, your display, also introduces new interesting features not seen before in past games. Festival Plaza, for example, lets you interact with friends or players around you, allowing you to chat and battle over Wifi or direct link. Pokémon Polago is a bit redundant after you have enough beans, but they allow you to gather enough said beans in order to feed your team in Pokémon Refresh, which is by far the most useful aspect of your Pokégear (obviously other than your actual Pokémon, and the items, and the map… shhhh). I recently had a battle with James, and learnt its incredible advantages – he had never touched Pokémon Refresh, while I consistently made sure to go in periodically to feed, stroke and ‘love’ my little guys, increasing their happiness, satiety and enjoyment. In battle, this means that your Pokémon really feel a strong connection with you, and every so often they will dodge a move in time with my shout, refrain from fainting to stop me worrying, and perform critical hits to be praised. Not only did this give me a really annoying edge over James (and I WON!), but it also encompasses all that the Pokémon franchise has been rabbiting on about throughout all past and present games: love your Pokémon, rather than use them simply as tools for fighting, and you will become ‘the very best, like no-one ever was!’. Plus I now get to gloat, muahaha.

Ride Pokémon are also a fantastic new feature in the game. Throughout the game, you can get a (SPOILERS) Tauros for charging, Lapras for surfing, Machoke for, uh, carrying you and pushing things, and a Charizard for flying, amongst others. While this is a great idea, I did actually miss the level of strategy that came with HM moves. The Hidden Machines that you couldn’t remove from your Pokémons’ movesets meant that you had to ensure you had a diversity of different types of Pokémon or ‘HM slaves’ that could learn a few of the moves that were necessary to navigate the whole game, such as Whirlpool to get rid of whirlpools in your way and Strength to move obstructive boulders. The graphics are cool with the new Pokémon though, which have definitely graduated from the default Lapras sprite you got with ANY surfing Pokémon.

God knows what Pokémon this was...probably a Feraligator.

The gameplay actually divides me as a seasoned Pokémon player. The animation, while of course utilising far better graphics than games gone past, actually takes ages in comparison, meaning that battles that shouldn’t take very long take ages watching the Pokémon charge up their moves, shake their tail, or . This is particularly apparent with Z-Moves, another new feature in this game. The Z-Moves are extremely powerful all-out moves you can only use once per battle, mediated by Z-Crystals which you can find or earn throughout the region by doing the Island Challenge. These moves, while graphically impressive, take ages to complete – for example, Litten’s final evolution’s Z-Move involves the Pokémon taking their rival to a boxing ring and charging at them with all its power. It’s useful in those tough battles, but hard to decide when the best time would be to use your only Z-Move, especially when you don’t know whether the Pokémon to come out next is stronger or weaker than the last.

Finally, I must talk about the one thing that really affects my opinion of any game: the story. The story is kind of a mind-screw at this point, with (SPOILERS) a fashionable woman, Lusamine, with an overly fanatical love of beauty unleashing Ultra Beasts, Pokémon from an alternate dimensions, into Alola and wanting to enter Ultra Space, said dimension, herself and stay there with the only things she’s attached to. Throughout the game, we learn that she has abused her two children, Gladion and Lillie, by abandoning them and neglecting them throughout their lives. This brings a very interesting dynamic to a Pokémon game that we haven’t seen before – many children and even adults playing this game may find this storyline particularly harrowing due to their own neglected childhood, and so could prove to split opinion with how Lusamine is treated by her children at the end of the story. All in all, it’s interesting, and her motivations are understandable but not so much that they are devoid of mystery.

As a veteran Pokémon player, I’ll always be biased. But this game is a lot of fun, and benefits from all of the interesting new features such as Z-Moves, Pokémon Ride and Alolan Pokémon. The new Pokémon themselves are interesting, without the ‘running out of ideas’ feel of some of the new Pokémon from other generations, such as Trubbish and Klefki (wow, a pile of garbage or a set of keys as your animal friend, who wouldn’t want that?).

The only massive thing I would change is the Exp Share function. I hate having to use it to be powerful enough, but when I do, I’m completely OP and don’t get to use some of my ‘weaker’ Pokémon as much – and for some reason, I feel bad if I don’t use all of them at least sometimes. This may be put down to how I also play games such as Skyrim and Final Fantasy XV – I must complete all of the side quests as well as the storyline, no matter how many I get. Maybe I’m just a perfectionist like that.

Having realised I posted so little last year, it’s time to get back into it with a lovely little memory post - my year in pictures, once more!

So in January we had just got back from travelling and had Christmas back in England, so really very little happened as we were very tired and broke and searching for jobs. But we saw our lovely friends who we’d missed loads over the last four months - I will always be grateful for those who stick around for us to come back to. 

Gacy? Storge?

In February, we did what we do every year - make sure we don’t go out on Valentine’s Day because of the ridiculous prices and busy-ness, and went out for dinner for an anti-Valentine’s instead. 2 for 1 cocktails are fun when one of you has to drive ;) 

George, Stacey, James and I (AKA Universally Challenged) lost at the pub quiz in the Comrades Club, though we really won as coming dead last means you get FOOD.

Tash, Beth and I also met up for Beth’s birthday, when we went to Soton for the ultimate student night in Jester’s - that student club where you have to wear old shoes because God knows what crap you’re going to get from the sticky floors in there. 

In March, I took THE PLUNGE. One I had been wanting to take for years. I got a tattoo!! My little Mantine is on my left thigh, happily swimming around like the manta rays we swim with in Fiji on our round-the-world trip (though he is a little smaller than the ones we met). It was sore but not as bad as I thought… though doing it on your ribs like I thought I wanted originally might be a different story. This is a photo of it on the day: 

And how could George, Stacey, James and I pass up a Misugo’s and Creams? 

God knows what we did in April, other than watching Eurovision with Alec… where a face swap meant that a celebrity turned up out of the blue!

In fact, April (or really March 30th) saw me start my new job with the Haulfryn Group as a Marketing Executive, where I still am today. 

In May, Beth came up to see me, and we took a lovely summery walk around Virginia Water Lake. 

Then James and I made sure we went to Comicon in London, where we finally got to meet our idols, the Yogscast & Hat Films! They really were lovely, especially their man man Lewis, who made sure to talk to us for ages despite the hours-long queue behind us! 

In June, Stef and I showed our mutual love/obsession with sushi by having a sushi-making session (though I may have got a bit tipsy and got impatient with all the fiddly rolling!). 

For those of you who remember (or care) the Queen turned 90 in June, so at work we had a ‘dress like a royal’ day. I won and my fellow Marketer/graphic designer Hannah (AKA Kate Middleton) came second! 

July marks the second half of the year, and also when my year started to pick up. That always seems to be the case with me - I do so much more exciting things in the second half! Though nothing could top my 4 months travelling, I’m sure. 

James and I took advantage of my company being the owner of holiday parks throughout the UK and took a trip down to Paignton, Devon, to stay in a luxury lodge, relax, and see his lovely cousins who live down there. We even had a hot tub!! 

We also finally met his cousins’ hairless kitties, who are actually gorgeous and not weird like so many people think about hairless cats. They were so friendly, though it is a bit weird stroking something without any fur! The female with a little bit of fur is named Lumi, and the completely bald male is Kuro (photo credit to Elise Preston for the latter). 

Those eyes though.

James and I also took advantage of the lovely scenery around us and the hot Summery days to play Pokemon Go, as it had only just come out then! 

I was also reunited with my uni girls again in Shoredich (2 out of 3 of them) and we had a lovely time, eating delicious street food and catching up (dat oversized bag wow)!

My nephew also turned 1 on the 16th of July, so my sister had a birthday party for him. 

In August I saw the girls (and Freddy!) again at a Hong Kong Drinking Team gig in London; perfect location for all of us to meet up! 

I also took time off work to spend time with my little sister Harriet at the beach…

…had more sushi and plum wine with Stef at Mikado’s…

…and saw the girls (all of them this time) again in London!)

Also in August, James and I took a day trip into London to take advantage of Harriet’s Merlin pass! 

We had crocodile and ostrich burgers at Shaka Zulu (a cocktail, burger and chips for £10 in the middle of London, whaaaat?) and then went onto Maddam Toussards - somewhere I’d never been, but had wanted to ever since seeing loads of them dotted around countries you’d never even think they’d have them on our travelling adventures. 

We met loads of celebrities there too #blessed.

With that chaotic month over, September didn’t slow down that much, with our friends Rosie and Josh having a leaving party before they jetted off to South America to do some travelling. 

See my Facebook timeline for an amazing video of Josh’s dancing!

My sisters and I also took my dad out for a late Father’s Day trip into London to again take advantage of Harriet’s Merlin passes - we went to the London Dungeons and the Aquarium! The Dungeons were brilliant, having not been there for ages, - of course my dad pointed out every inaccuracy, and Amelia being pregnant meant she couldn’t go on the little rides they had in there, haha!

Beth also came down to go to one of James’ gigs…

…and I was sad to have to move offices in September, as my commute would be slightly longer and I’d miss reading by the beautiful Thames on my lunch breaks. 

October saw Stef turn 23, and we had a big house party over her’s, which was great fun! Sam debated heavily with her mum, we took some great photos, and I saw Laura again for the first time in nearly 2 years. ^-^ 

We also went back down to Devon to see James’ cousins again…

…went to MCM again and met Tomska, another of our Youtube heroes…

…and finally I went down to Soton to go with the girls to Oceana for Halloween! We had such a good time at predrinks together in our posh little hotel rooms.  

Sadly, James’ gran passed away at the end of September. However, she very lovingly left her home to James, and so we had spent the whole of October and November doing it up, so that we could finally live together after 7 whole years of being together. It took weeks of painting and sorting and carpets and quite a bit of our savings, but it was totally, completely worth it, just to be finally living together after so long.

In November, our lovely neighbour, Joe, installed our shower for us and put up the beautiful splashboards that we picked in a stunning slate colour. 

November marked our 7 year anniversary - can you believe it?! 

So, at the end of the month we went to the Ice Bar and Winter Wonderland, both of which we’d never been to before, so it was lovely and a completely new experience, going around one of the biggest Christmas markets in the UK. 

And what anniversary would be complete without sushi…

Weirdly, PM Theresa May came to our work on Friday to open our new Maidenhead offices, being the constituent for Maidenhead. She had her funky shoes on and looks suitably confused. This may be when one of our managers asked “Is Brexit actually going to happen?” 

December was SUCH a busy month. Not least because James and I FINALLY MOVED IN TOGETHER!! My cats tried to sabotage our efforts however by camping in my last pile of dirty laundry…

We moved in on the 2nd of December, and due to our efforts of the previous couple of months, it very quickly felt homely and cosy. We bought 2 sofas from the charity shop, put up the Christmas decorations, and - most importantly - made sure both our computers fit in the living room for optimal gaming time!

Despite being pretty ill the first week, it was great.

Our good friend Lynne even made us this lovely moving in present!

After all that excitement, I had a very early birthday party on the 10th of December, seeing all my friends in the local pub, The Squirrels. 

I also made sure to see the girls from uni one last time this year in London for dinner and drinks.

In the middle of December, Haulfryn had a Christmas party, which I could take James along to. It was really fun - it was a masquerade mall in Reading, with a three-course meal and wine, as well as acrobats and other acts to keep as all entertained, and a casino for James to try his luck! Having been at Haulfryn for almost a year now, it’s nice to be able to go to a big event like this. 

For my birthday this year, James really went all out. I had no idea what he had planned - only that we were going to London, and I had to wear my Pokemon dress! So I donned it and off we went.

First he took me to Sticks ‘n’ Sushi in Covent Garden for a late lunch - and as all I seem to eat is sushi you’ll know how incredible that must have been!

Mmmm big decanter of sake.

Then afterwards we got on the tube to Hammersmith, where the London Philharmonic Orchestra were playing… and what were they playing? Pokemon!

It was incredible - they played music from all of the games, telling the stories of the games throughout, and showing a lot of the game footage on their screen. It was incredibly nostalgic, amazingly well done, and even if you aren’t a fan of Pokemon, the Philharmonic are obviously incredible, and so the music was flawless. 

I couldn’t have asked for a better (or geekier) birthday. Thank you James. 

On the 23rd, Hong Kong Drinking Team had been asked to headline the ‘best of the year’ show in the Facebar, and so I went along - and they didn’t disappoint. While most of the acts were heavy, James and his band dressed up as Christmas characters (James: Santa; Jack: Jesus; Dave: sexy Christmas pudding,#; Luke: Bongle the Bear from Rainbow (he thought it was a reindeer in the fancy dress shop); and Charlie: sexy elf). And boy, was Charlie a sexy elf. They did Santa Baby and Charlie was especially camp. My favourite gig of theirs for the whole year!

Christmas was incredibly special this year, as for the first time James and I didn’t have to balance our days - we were just together. As cheesy as it sounds, it was magical! 

For Christmas Eve, we went to a onesie party up a the Squirrels to see in the big day.

Christmas Day saw us opening our stockings together, and then going to the Squirrels for Christmas drinks. 

Afterwards we had a lovely Christmas dinner with the Skinners and a chilled out evening.

On Boxing Day, after seeing my Mum and Amelia, James and I had my dad and Harriet over, as my dad hasn’t had a family Christmas in a few years. It was great - we played Cards Against Humanity (which my dad loved!), I cooked, and James’ parents came over late afternoon.

The last few days of the year were just as exciting. On the 30th, it was the Squirrels’ landlady’s birthday, and so we had an 80s night up the pub!

James also met Jess’ South African boyfriend Adrian, and now I’m worried about us staying together… they have a proper bromance going on!

Seeing in the New Year was just as great, with karaoke, dancing, and lots of booze. 

And lastly, as I put on a bit of weight travelling and got out of my fitness regime, I took up running this year rather than paying for the gym. It’s amazing how much more you want to exercise when you don’t have to travel as well! I smashed my distance goal for the year, and running has now become part of my lifestyle as well as an easy way to keep healthy. 

Overwatch has taken the gaming world by storm ever since its release on 24th May 2016, and for good reason. Blizzard have managed to create a game with as much addictiveness as Team Fortress 2 had in its day, but with far better weapons and maps, and much more fun. Here’s a review from a girl who normally stays away from first person shooters due to her lack of lightning-fast reflexes.

The game takes place 60 years in the future of fictionalised Earth, 30 years after the Omnic Crisis, where omnics, robots with artificial intelligence designed to create worldwide economic equality, had been developed by facilities called omniums. A war between humans and omnics began when the omniums developed lethal and hostile omnics that turned against their human creators. Overwatch was thus created by the UN, an international task force designed to combat this threat and restore order. For decades this organisation kept the peace, successfully quelling the omnic uprising. However, Overwatch was disbanded when allegations of wrongdoings and failures were brought to public attention and lead to in-fighting between its members. An explosion that destroyed Overwatch headquarters lead the UN to dismantle the organisation and forbid any Overwatch-type activity.

Our game is set some years after this where, without Overwatch, corporations have started to take over, terrorism has broken out in some parts of the world, and there are signs of a second Omnic Crisis originating in Russia. So, some of the former members of Overwatch decide to reform the organisation, despite the UN’s decision. This is where we come in, playing as these members and battling to maintain the peace, or to sabotage it.

The objective of Overwatch is simple: take out the other team. This could be from an attacking or defensive point of view, where your team of 6 could be:

1.      Attacking a point controlled by the opposing team or to stop the opposing team from capturing it first

2.      Defending a point from being taken by the opposing team

3.      Defending a ‘payload’ that the opposing team must escort a certain distance

4.      Escorting a ‘payload’, attempting to foil the opposing team’s attempts to stop you reaching the checkpoints

All of these tasks must be completed within a limited amount of time.

There are also several play modes to choose from:

1.      Practice: where you can hone your skills against the NPCs, trying out lesser-played characters and perfecting their very different and wonderful skills in any of the maps.

2.      Quick Play: this is the main gameplay mode, where you play against a team of 6 in a best of three scenario and get experience. You receive more experience the better you play, which is indicated by the medals you achieve: you can get gold, silver, bronze or nothing for things like eliminations, damage dealt, health, and various other Hero specific achievements, such as “Souls Consumed” for Reaper or “Transcendence Healing” for Zenyatta. After enough experience has been gained, you go up levels, which the game’s algorithm then calculates the levels of the other random players you are pitted against. You can also play with friends in this mode by entering it as a pre-made group.

3.      Competitive: this is a very new mode, and Blizzard are still working to make the experience better for everyone, but at the moment it feels a lot more serious than Quick Play does. You firstly play 10 preliminary matches to determine your starting ranking, and then after that you go up and down rankings with each win or loss. Instead of playing best of three, you play best of five, making the game a lot longer, with ‘sudden deaths’ if a draw occurs. These are frustrating, because of course on certain maps defending is easier than attacking and vice versa, so if the coin flips and you are put on the disadvantageous side, you are likely to lose. I’ve found that people get a lot angrier on this game mode too, which is actually more hilarious than actually disheartening when people rage over chat. Blizzard definitely need to update the sudden death occurrences, and also make it more obvious how you get rewarded for good play – it doesn’t seem you get any extra points or experience for lots of gold medals or the like.

4.      Custom Game: a mode where you can adjust the conditions for matches: you can change which maps or characters are played, randomise the characters that the players respawn as every time, and even just play one-on-one matches with friends. This gameplay is a lot of fun, and good to utilise to try out all of the characters to hone your skills with each of them individually.

5.      Weekly Brawl: as the name suggests, this changes every week, and has different conditions. This could be something like only being allowed to play as one hero, or one type of hero such as tank or defence. I played it the other day with my other half, and we had a lot of fun with the random character spawn rule, especially when I got a mean tank and he had to try and fight me with a squishy support character.

The characters that are available to play have their own fascinating backstories and play styles, some of which definitely appeal to me more than others. There are 16 ‘heroes’ with only 5 ‘villains’, although this is irrelevant in gameplay. These are split into 4 types: Offense, Defence, Tank and Support.

I’ll start with the character that attracted me to this multiplayer FPS: Hanzo.

A Japanese assassin and mercenary, Hanzo Shimada carries a bow which fires normal arrows, sonic arrows which detect enemies, and scatter arrows which shoot off multiple arrows at once to hit several targets. Having played and loved Skyrim, in which I mainly used melee weapons and bows (see http://laureviewer.tumblr.com/post/120640477104/the-elder-scrolls-v-skyrim-a-review for my full review!), it seemed like a good character to ease myself into the game. I may not have been able to aim with a gun, but bows are no problem, particularly as with a sniper character, you can take a breather and stay back from the fray – something an inexperienced player like me needs in order to get used to the game and be effective. His ability to climb up walls is also great, as he can get to high vantage points quickly and easily.

His ultimate attack, Dragonstrike, is a lot of fun. These ultimate attacks ‘charge’ over time, and the more damage you do the faster it charges. He yells in Japanese while firing off an arrow, which travels a short distance before bursting into two spectral dragons that overlap and curl around each other, devastating anyone in its path. I’ve found this is particularly useful when defending a point or the payload, as shooting towards it makes the opposite team scatter. So, even if a kill is not obtained using his ultimate, Hanzo can still clear an area, giving relief to his team and disrupting the enemy’s manoeuvres. Enemy Bastions, the Kings of static defence, need to be wary of Dragonstrike.

Type of Character: Defence/Sniper Time Played: 9 hours Average Eliminations: 8.56 Official Overwatch July 2016 Ranking: Tier 4 Interesting Fact: Hanzo killed his brother, Genji, after he refused to train to help take over the family business, leading Hanzo, distraught, to quit the business and roam the world, seeking to regain his lost honour.  

Reaper

I have only recently got into playing as Reaper, as my ability to use guns effectively has really improved since playing Overwatch and I didn’t enjoy playing as anyone with a gun at the beginning. But I soon grew to like him due to three main reasons: the vast amount of damage he does at close range; he absorbs the souls of the dead, healing himself; and his ability to wraith away out of a fight – that is, he can turn invincible in his wraith form, allowing him to rush away before taking too much damage. All of this means that, even if I’m faced with someone with better skills than me, I can escape easily or take them out quickly before their experience as a CoD player becomes too much of an advantage.  I don’t use his teleport skill quite as much, but it is useful to get behind an unsuspecting Bastion to take them out before they’ve noticed me. His ultimate attack, Death Blossom, is devastating but it is easy to be killed while using it. Essentially Reaper yells “Die, die, die!” while spinning with his twin Hellfire shotguns, firing in all directions.

I reckon I enjoy him so much because, even though he is an offensive character, his main job is to detract himself from the team and go sneak up behind unsuspecting enemies, killing them with stealth and brutality. Again, like a sniper, I always enjoyed the stealth missions, as it meant I wouldn’t have to deal with more skilled players or NPCs too often. Reaper really is a fun character, and it’s always great rushing around a game looking like a heavily armed Grim Reaper.

Type of Character: Offense Time Played: 7 hours Average Eliminations: 12.14 Official Overwatch July 2016 Ranking: Tier 2 Interesting Fact: many theorise that Reaper is really Gabriel Reyes, a veteran soldier who was tasked with leading Blackwatch, Overwatch’s black ops division, when it was first established. He supposedly died after a battle with Overwatch’s commander and Reyes’ former friend, Jack Morrison, after a rift was formed between them.

Mei

Mei is one of those characters arguably not played as much, as her style is very different. She uses an Endothermic Blaster which freezes her enemies and shoots icicles, and she has the ability to form ice walls for defence and can cryogenically freeze herself in order to block damage from opponents and regain health at the same time. This appealed to me early on as it rarely needed good aim to deal damage; like Pyro in TF2, just spray haphazardly with Mei and you’re bound to freeze up an enemy in a short time. Her ultimate is pretty great too – it summons a blizzard with a cute weather modification drone, freezing any enemies in the radius, allowing easy kills for either Mei or her teammates. It’s really useful particularly when several members of the opposing team are on a point.

As long as you can get close enough to an opponent before they can shoot you down with more powerful weapons, Mei is pretty unstoppable. Unless you’re faced with a tank with lots of health, that is, and then you must be careful, as freezing them may not take off enough damage to finish them off with a quick icicle to the face when they defrost again.

Type of Character: Defence Time Played: 5 hours Average Eliminations: 10.82 Official Overwatch July 2016 Ranking: Tier 4 Interesting Fact: Mei travelled to Antarctica under the employ of Overwatch to find the cause for the planet’s changing climate. She and her team were trapped by a polar storm, and lacking resources to wait for a rescue, they entered cryostasis. Mei was the only survivor to be found years later.

Lucio

One of my favourite support characters, Lucio uses music to combat his opponents. He uses a sonic amplifier gun to damage and knock back enemies, and his music can either heal his teammates over time or increase their movement speed. His ultimate (“Let’s break it down!”) uses soundwaves to give him and his teammates shields. I really do like Lucio for a few reasons: a) he heals over time, so for newer characters it’s more likely they’ll stay alive longer and get more out of the match; b) he is fast, particularly with the boost from his gun, allowing the player to get in and out of combat quickly; c) and he is quite easy to get ‘on fire’ with, as he is constantly racking up points healing and sticking with teammates on the point or payload, allowing him to accumulate points easily. Also, with his long-ranged weapon, Lucio is great to hang back behind the bigger heroes, staying out of damage’s way and shooting at opponents from a distance. He’s a great support character, as he heals all teammates if in range, rather than just one like the other supports.

Type of Character: Support Time Played: 5 hours Average Eliminations: 7.76 Official Overwatch July 2016 Ranking: Tier 1 Interesting Fact: Lucio grew up in the midst of the financial upheaval in Rio de Janeiro following the Omnic crisis. He played in clubs and on the streets in order to lift the citizens’ spirits. However, when the Vishkar Corporation moved in to redevelop the city, they implemented curfews on the citizens and exploited them as cheap labour, causing Lucio to steal a Vishkar sonic weapon and use it against them. He rallied the people to rise up and drive the company out of their neighbourhoods, making him a global political figure and popstar.

D.Va

Again, I’ve only just started playing as D.Va recently, as I decided I should get good at a Tank character – due to their purpose of getting in the middle of a fight to cause massive damage and disrupt enemy ranks, Tanks were a class I avoided at first, as I would die very easily. D.Va’s high mobility has meant that I have started to use her to learn this overly offensive class.

D.Va is a South-Korean ex-gamer, who pilots a combat mech with twin fusion cannons as her main weapon and rocket boosters to launch herself into the air. While her weapons are very effective at close range, from a distance they are not as effective, meaning that her defensive system to shoot projectiles out of the air is very useful. Yelling “Nerf this!”, D.Va ejects herself out of her mech as it self-destructs, damaging all enemies in its radius as her ultimate attack. If her mech is destroyed in this way, or in combat, she can use a blaster herself until she can resummons it. The ultimate therefore poses a problem to D.Va: while she is out of the mech, she is very vulnerable, waiting until she can resummon it to get her high health back. However, with  her recent buff by the Battlenet overloards, I’m finding her a lot more playable as she does not get destroyed by her own exploding mech when she uses her ultimate anymore, and so the player doesn’t have to have an escape route before ejecting.

Type of Character: Tank Time Played: 2 hours Average Eliminations: 11.34 Official Overwatch July 2016 Ranking: Tier 4 Interesting Fact: Real name Hana Song, D.Va was the reigning Starcraft II champion at the time that a massive omnic rose from the East China Sea. The South Korean army developed battle mechs to combat it, but the omnic learned from the forthcoming battles, eventually disrupting the mechs’ drone-control abilities. The army therefore had to turn to human pilots, and decided to turn to professional gamers, as they were deemed to have the necessary skills and reflexes to pilot the mechs. D.Va has since gained worldwide fame, streaming footage of her combat missions.

Soldier: 76

76 is definitely one of the easiest characters to get into if you’re used to FPS games, due to his gun that wouldn’t be too out of place in CoD – he uses an experimental pulse rifle that also launches rockets, and his ultimate ability activates the visor in his mask (“Tactical visor activated!”), allowing him to always hit his targets for a brief period. He can also put down a device that heals himself and all allies in the small radius. His gun is actually pretty easy to use, despite the FPS similarities, and helped me at the beginning of my Overwatch adventure to learn how to aim and shoot far more accurately. Standard, maybe a bit on the boring side, but definitely effective.

Type of Character: Offense Time Played: 1 hour Average Eliminations: 14.32 Official Overwatch July 2016 Ranking: Tier 2 Interesting Fact: Real name Jack Morrison, he was one of the founders of Overwatch, and supposedly died in the explosion that followed the rift between himself and Reyes (Reaper). He re-emerged under the name "Soldier: 76” and has dedicated himself to discover the truth behind the events that lead to the fall of Overwatch, stealing weapons and advanced technologies from former Overwatch facilities.

Widowmaker

Another sniper, Widowmaker is a good choice for anyone who wants to step out of the fight and cause devastation from a hiding place. She has a versatile gun that can be used as an automatic rifle at close range, as well as a sniper rifle that allows her to zoom in and pick off opponents from a great distance. She has good mobility too, with a grappling hook to get her to high and out of reach places, and poison mines that she drops to disable enemies and to warn her when one may be approaching. Her ultimate activates her recon visor, which allows her and her teammates to see enemies through walls (“No-one can hide from my sight!”).

Widowmaker’s a tough Hero to use in my opinion, as not only do you need very quick reflexes and great aim to snipe an opponent who is running around all over the place, but due to poor visibility around herself when using the sniper rifle, if an opponent figures out where she is hiding, she can be taken out from behind very easily. However, a well-placed poison mine can save her, if the opponent triggers it when sneaking up behind her. I think I need to have a bit more practice with her, as I’d love to be an effective ‘real’ sniper – Hanzo’s fun, but doesn’t quite cut it.

Type of Character: Defence/Sniper Time Played: 1 hour Average Eliminations: 8.91 Official Overwatch July 2016 Ranking: Tier 3 Interesting Fact: Real name Amélie, Widowmaker was the wife of Gérard Lacroix, an Overwatch agent heading operations against Talon, the terrorist group. When the group’s assassins could not get close to him, they kidnapped Amélie and reprogrammed her as a sleeper agent. She killed her husband in her sleep 2 weeks after Overwatch rescued her. Talon also altered her physiology to slow her heart, turning her skin blue and numbing her emotional responses.

Zenyatta

In order to really excel with Zenyatta, you have to make sure you are changing up his attacks – left shift (on a PC) gives a teammate a healing Harmony Orb, while E gives an opponent a Discord Orb, which causes them to take more damage than normal. Another advantage of his Discord Orb is that it allows Zenyatta to see the opponent it is attached to, even through walls. He’s a great character – he is an omnic monk, and so these orbs float around him like cybernetic prayer beads, and he floats in a meditative pose rather than runs around the map. His ultimate ability, Transcendence (“Pass into the iris!”), makes him temporarily invulnerable and heals both himself and any teammates in his radius.

Zenyatta is a great hero, not just because it will prevent the opponents wiping out the whole team on a push to the point or payment, but because that Discord Orb means that he can probably cause more damage to enemies than the other Support Heroes. The downside is that he is very invulnerable – he only has 200 health, one of the lowest in the game, and has very low mobility, so if an enemy gets close to him, it is unlikely Zenyatta will get out alive.

Type of Character: Support Time Played: 2 hours Average Eliminations: 8.86 Official Overwatch July 2016 Ranking: Tier 5 Interesting Fact: Zenyatta belonged to the Shambali, an order of omnic monks who experienced a “spiritual awakening” that lead them to believe that, like humans, omnics have souls. He disagrees with the order’s approach of only spreading their message in public rallies, believing that only direct engagement with humans will bridge the divide between man and machine. He left the monastery and travels the world in order to help those he meets find inner peace and to connect personally with humans.

Reinhardt

The ultimate tank, Reinhardt is good for a new player to start with due to his defences. He is an obvious choice on maps with a payload or a point, as he has a hard-light shield that can block a vast amount of damage from the opposing team. He wears a heavy suit of powered armour which incorporates rocket boosters that allow him to smash into his enemies and crush them against the wall, and carries a rocket-powered warhammer. His ultimate ability is "Earthshatter", where he slams his hammer onto the ground to knock over and damage all enemies in front of him; this also stuns the enemies.

Personally I have found Reinhardt useful with his shield, but can’t quite get a grip on his charge attack, often missing and then leaving the payload and my team open. The melee attack with his hammer is also difficult, as other Heroes are mostly much smaller and faster than Reinhardt, making visibility to actually hit someone quite limited. He’s definitely a crucial Tank to have about, but due to his lack of any long-ranged attack other than his burst he can fire from his warhammer, I’ll have to have some more practice before I can be effective with him.

Type of Character: Tank Time Played: 40 mins Average Eliminations: 2.91 Official Overwatch July 2016 Ranking: Tier 1 Interesting Fact: Reinhardt was one of the founding Overwatch members, and lives under a knightly code of chivalry. He remained in service well into his 50s, but was forced into mandatory retirement when Overwatch collapsed. He has refused to abandon his ideals and happily rejoined the ‘unofficial’ Overwatch team of the present.  

Pharah

Pharah was a character very similar to the soldier in TF2, insofar that she fires rockets at her opponents, meaning that her aim does not need to be entirely accurate. However, she also wears a combat suit called the Raptora Mark VI which includes a jetpack, allowing herself to be launched into the air and fly around above the heads of the other Heroes. She also has a Wedjet (Eye of Horus) tattoo around her right eye, and her ultimate ability is rocket barrage (“Justice rains from above!”), an explosive area-of-effect attack. As I say, I like her as her rockets are powerful do not need incredible accuracy, but if you hit a wall near to you, it can damage you as well. Also, her jetpack is useful in certain situations, giving access to hard-to-reach areas and giving Pharah a means of escape, but are also a bit fiddly to use and accurately land.

Type of Character: Offense Time Played: 2 hours Average Eliminations: 10.96 Official Overwatch July 2016 Ranking: Tier 3 Interesting Fact: She is the daughter of Ana Amari, one of the founding members of Overwatch. Looking to follow in her mother’s footsteps and join Overwatch, she served as an officer in the Egyptian Army but Overwatch was disbanded before she could join its ranks.

Bastion

One thing that always springs to mind when Bastion comes into play: ragequit! Having a Bastion on the opposing team can really frustrate your game. Bastions are robots, originally used for peacekeeping purposes but turned against their human makers in the Omnic Crisis – and they were especially effective, as not only does it have a submachine gun in its mobile recon configuration, but it also has the ability to transform into a much more powerful stationary turret equipped with a Gatling gun. This is the form that annoys everyone facing Bastion, and recently opposing teams have realised the necessity of sending in an assassin to take out Bastion from behind to stop him sitting on a point and taking out everything in his path – attacking from behind while he’s in turret mode, too, means he takes double the damage. He can also heal himself, and his ultimate attack turns him into a full-blown tank that can move around and fire high-explosive rounds. Conclusion: Bastion is fun if you can get into a good position to fire from all sides, but not if you’re facing him.  

Type of Character: Defence Time Played: 7 mins Average Eliminations: 20.00 Official Overwatch July 2016 Ranking: Tier 5 Interesting Fact: After the Omnic Crisis, Bastion was severely damaged in the field during the final days of the war, and was left dormant and exposed to the elements. It stayed there for more than a decade and became overgrown with plant life and animals until it one day mysteriously reactivated. For more than a decade, it became overgrown with plant life and the nests of small animals, until it mysteriously reactivated. Due to conflicts with fearful humans, Bastion largely avoids populated areas in favour of exploring the wild. The little bird that accompanies him is called Ganymede.

Symmetra

Symmetra is an interesting support character, as she doesn’t heal her teammates, only herself. Her main asset is in fact her building skills – she can create turrets, armour and portals (her ultimate ability, used to teleport team members from the spawn closer to the action) out of light, and the former can be stuck onto any surface, giving her a very sneaky and effective way of dealing damage. She also has a photon projector that fires a short-ranged beam at enemies, doing more damage the longer the beam is connected, and can also fire photon projection orbs for longer-ranged attacks. She’s a very new character to me, and so I’m still learning with her, but it is fun getting eliminations by not really doing anything. She is very fragile, however, and when faced with an enemy, unless she has turrets to defend her, her photon projector doesn’t do enough damage to gain an elimination before she dies.

Type of Character: Support Time Played: 14 mins Average Eliminations: 6.50 Official Overwatch July 2016 Ranking: Tier 4 Interesting Fact: Satya Vaswani’s potential as an architect, her ability to bend hard light into any shape needed for her purpose, was discovered at a young age, and she was taken from a life of poverty to train at Vishkar’s architect academy – the company who created hard light technology. She was one of the top students in her class and combined the light-bending technology with the traditional dances of her homeland.  

Roadhog

Roadhog’s a lot of fun. With his huge amount of health (and his ability to heal) and his chain that he can hook opponents with, stunning them and bringing them close to him for a quick blast in the face with his scrap gun, he’s a great tank to play around with, getting into the fight with a massive amount of damage.  His ultimate ability allows him to put a top loader into his scrap gun, turning it into a machine gun. The downsides to Roadhog are that he’s so big he’s easy to hit, he’s slow, and his scrap gun is also very slow and needs reloading after only 4 rounds.

Type of Character: Tank Time Played: 51 mins Average Eliminations: 6.97 Official Overwatch July 2016 Ranking: Tier 2 Interesting Fact: Mako Rutledge lived in the Australian Outback after the Omnic Crisis, when the country’s government allowed the omnics to take possession of the omnium and the territory around it, displacing the human residents, in a bid to make peace. The angry humans, including Mako, formed the Australian Liberation Front to fight back, and overloaded the fusion core in the omnium, destroying it and turning the Outback into a radioactive wasteland. Roadhog is now a bodyguard for Junkrat.  

Genji

I wish I could get a hang of this character! His incredible mobility means not only is fighting this character difficult, but playing as him too, as Genji always has to know what he’s about to do next – there’s no pausing to take stock or consider your next move with him. He is a Japanese cyborg ninja, who throws shuriken at a distance and has his katana which he uses when charging rapidly forward to slice at his opponents. He also uses this sword to deflect projectiles to deal damage back at his opponents; very useful against something like a Bastion whose bullets are rapid and deal lots of damage, and very frustrating for a Hero facing Genji. His ultimate attack allows him to make killing strikes with his Ōdachi.

Type of Character: Offense Time Played: 27 mins Average Eliminations: 8.07 Official Overwatch July 2016 Ranking: Tier 3 Interesting Fact: Genji was the youngest son of the master of the Shimada clan, who were a guild of assassins in Hanamura (which, incidentally, is a map in the game). He took little interest in the family crime trade despite excelling in his combat training, and after his father died, his elder brother Hanzo demanded he take a more active role. When Genji refused, they duelled, and Hanzo left believing he had killed Genji. This was not the case, and Genji was found and remade into a cyborg warrior by Overwatch. He dismantled his family’s criminal empire, and afterwards abandoned Overwatch and wandered the world in search of meaning, as he was disgusted by his mechanisation. He met Zenyatta, who became his mentor and taught him to accept his dual existence as man and machine.

Junkrat

One of the most annoying characters in the game, you can get killed by a Junkrat without even knowing they were there. His frag grenade launcher has a long range and can kill easily when spammed into a Hero, especially in close spaces, and his remote-detonated concussion mines can be thrown at an opponent for a lot of damage. He also uses spike traps to stop opponents moving so he and his team can finish them off, and when he is killed, he releases grenades to hurt anyone in range. His ultimate ability (“Ladies and gentlemen, start your engines!”), the RIP-Tire, is a spiked tire filled with explosives that the player controls, leading it into an opponent or many opponents to then explode and kill them all.

Type of Character: Defence Time Played: 13 mins Average Eliminations: 6.00 Official Overwatch July 2016 Ranking: Tier 3 Interesting Fact: Jamison Fawkes was in the Outback when the omnium that Roadhog and the ALF attacked exploded, turning the Outback into a radioactive wasteland. Living in the ruins are the Junkers, a group of scavengers and mercenaries, such as Junkrat. The radiation caused madness in the Junkers, which soon developed into pyromania. In the bones of the destroyed omnium, Junkrat found a valuable secret (which Blizzard has not yet detailed), making him the target of bounty hunters and rival gangs. So, he made a deal with Roadhog, who is now his personal bodyguard in return for a 50-50 share of the profits from their scavenging.  

Winston

A genetically engineered gorilla scientist and adventurer, Winston wears eyeglasses and armour that has a jet pack, allowing him to leap forward short distances, and carries a Tesla cannon. This doesn’t require accuracy, as it shoots electricity that stays on an opponent as long as you hold it, though it has relatively low damage for a tank despite getting more powerful the longer it charges. He can activate a temporary shield bubble to protect him and his teammates, and his ultimate ability, “Primal Rage”, not only restores him to full health but also allows him to tap into his inner beast and go on a rampage. In this he is all but invulnerable and it increases his melee damage. I haven’t played as Winston much, but in general, even though he can cause real mayhem on the field with his mobility and in particular his ultimate attack, it seems that the other tanks are more powerful. Saying this, he is ranked in the second tier in Overwatch’s official July 2016 ranking, so maybe I should go back and see what I’m missing.

Type of Character: Tank Time Played: N/A Average Eliminations: 0.00 Official Overwatch July 2016 Ranking: Tier 2 Interesting Fact: Winston was one of the genetically enhanced gorillas living at the Horizon Lunar Colony, a research base on the moon, being used to test the effects of living in space for an extended period of time. The other gorillas rose up, killed the human scientists and took over the colonies, and Winston escaped to Earth in a rocket he built himself, taking his mentor and caretaker’s name, Dr Harold Winston, who was also the colony’s chief scientist, along with his eyeglasses. He joined the original Overwatch team, giving his scientific expertise to the team such as building Tracer’s chronal accelerator (see Tracer).

Mercy

As Mercy cannot heal herself and doesn’t have much damage output, she has never been one of my favourite characters, particularly as she works very much like the medic in TF2 – she has a Caduceus staff that allows her to either heal her teammates or boost their damage, and a little blaster just in case she gets separated from her team. She wears a Valkyrie suit with wings, making her look like an angel, which allows her to fly towards allies and slows her fall from high places. Unless you are playing with someone you know and are synergising, she is a difficult character to play with a random team. Saying this, her ultimate ability is very powerful if used at the right time: she can resurrect fallen teammates within a 15 metre radius and within 10 seconds of their deaths (otherwise they will respawn before she can bring them back to life), so if a team is all but wiped out, a Mercy can be the difference between a win or a loss.

Type of Character: Support Time Played: 14 mins Average Eliminations: 0.00 Official Overwatch July 2016 Ranking: Tier 2 Interesting Fact: Angela Ziegler was head of surgery at a Swiss hospital, where she developed specialised nanotechnology to heal injuries and later her Valkyrie suit. Overwatch recognised her talents and recruited her as their chief medical researcher. When Overwatch disbanded, she dedicated herself to helping those who were affected by the decades-long Omnic Crisis.

Tracer

Tracer’s another tricky one. Much like Genji, she is wicked fast and requires more of a reflexive player to be able to control her effectively. She can manipulate time by teleporting ahead or rewinding time backwards, making her extremely difficult to aim at and the latter also takes her back to before any conflict, such as regaining her health. She also has two rapid-fire pistols, and her ultimate ability is pulse bomb that can attach to its targets and explode them. I need to play her more, as in the right hands she is very annoying and effective.

Type of Character: Offence Time Played: <1 min Average Eliminations: 0.00 Official Overwatch July 2016 Ranking: Tier 3 Interesting Fact: Lena Oxton, from London, was the youngest test pilot in Overwatch’s experimental flight programme and was testing the “Slipstream”, a plane that used teleportation technology, when a malfunction caused the craft to vanish and she was believed to be dead. She reappeared months later suffering from “chronal dissociation”. Her molecules had become desynchronised from the normal flow of time and she could not maintain a physical form in the present, often disappearing for days at a time. Winston developed a “chronal accelerator”, seen on her chest, to anchor her in the present, and grants her control over her time travelling powers.

Torbjörn

Your typical builder character, Torbjörn does what it says on the box: he builds turrets from the mobile forge built into his armour, which deal damage to any opponent who crosses its path and can be upgraded. He also carries a rivet gun and a forge hammer for upgrading and repairing his turret, and he can also make armour upgrades for his teammates. His ultimate ability, “Molton Core”, overheats his personal forge and grants a speed bonus to turret construction and repair as well as a damage and defence bonus. He’s good fun as getting eliminations while away from the action is satisfying, but I find that once killed, Torbjorn has a hard time getting back into the action and building a turret quick enough to stem the opposing team’s subsequent attacks.

Type of Character: Defence Time Played: 10 mins Average Eliminations: 5.76 Official Overwatch July 2016 Ranking: Tier 4 Interesting Fact: Torbjörn believes that technology should serve a better vision for humanity, disagreeing with his employers, who wanted to control the weapons they created with artificial intelligence – the omnics. During the Omnic Crisis, his fear of sentient machines, dismissed previously as paranoia, was proven, and he was recruited by Overwatch due to his engineering knowledge, which proved invaluable in ending the Omnic Crisis. Once Overwatch was disbanded, his weapons were stashed away or stolen, and his aim is to make sure they are not used to harm the innocent.

Zarya

Zarya is another tank I’ve barely played – although after this review is out, I really want to get on it, as I’ve noticed recently how much damage a good Zarya player than deal. She carries a particle cannon that increases in damage when her shields absorb the damage dealt by opponents – this shield is personal, and she can also project it onto one other teammate. These shields are only up for a limited time, but add a significant amount of power to her cannon. She can also fire a projectile that explodes on the target and then does a little amount of splash damage. Her ultimate ability is a gravity bomb that immobilises and damages opponents in its range, making opponents caught in it vulnerable to you and your teammates as you fire into the vicinity. She’s tough, and fiddly with making sure her shields are up effectively enough so that they can absorb as much damage as possible.

Type of Character: Tank Time Played: N/A Average Eliminations: 0.00 Official Overwatch July 2016 Ranking: Tier 2 Interesting Fact: The Omnic Crisis devastated Zarya’s village in Siberia, which was where the Crisis first began. As she grew older, she swore to gain the strength to protect her homeland and her people, becoming a bodybuilder and weightlifter. She was expected to break records in the world championships, but on the eve of the tournament, the dormant omnium in Siberia awakened and she withdrew from the competition to join the local defence forces.

McCree

The last character that I haven’t got along with, McCree uses a Peacekeeper six-shooter – the main issue here is the recoil on the gun, which makes my already dodgy (but getting much better!) aim even dodgier. He also has rolling mobility manoeuvre to get out of tight spots and reload quickly, and flashbang grenades, which make being an opponent of his very difficult; he stuns you, meaning you are a sitting duck, waiting for McCree to finish you off. His ultimate ability, ‘Deadeye’ (“It’s high noon!”) allows him to hit every enemy in his line of sight. He’s a tricky one, with no healing or shield abilities, and I really need to improve my aim before I can excel at this character.

Type of Character: Offence Time Played: 10 mins Average Eliminations: 10.15 Official Overwatch July 2016 Ranking: Tier 3 Interesting Fact: Jesse McCree is a former member of the Deadlock gang, who trafficked military hardware in the American Southwest before being captured by Overwatch. He was given a choice to either go to prison or serve in Blackwatch with Reaper. He chose the latter, wanting to make amends for his past crimes, and he enjoyed the lack of bureaucratic oversight. When Overwatch collapsed and Blackwatch sought to take over, McCree disappeared, coming back years later as a gunslinger for hire.

Ana

Now here’s an interesting one: Ana was only announced on the 12th of July, and only entered the game on the 19th, but an introductory video has told us a lot about her. One of the founding members of Overwatch, she is a sniper, using her Biotic Rifle to fire specialised darts to damage enemies and prevent them from healing, or to heal allies. She also carries a sidearm to fire sleeping darts to incapacitate foes, and Biotic Grenades that damage enemies and heal allies in its radius. Her ultimate ability, Nano Boost, seems to grant allies additional speed and damage and gives them reduced damage from enemies. I’m interested to see how her support will work, but I truly think a sniper-healer is a very intuitive and exciting idea! I’ll let you know how I get on with her in the future.

Type of Character: Support Time Played: N/A Average Eliminations: 0.00 Official Overwatch July 2016 Ranking: N/A Interesting Fact: Considered the best sniper in the world, she supported the unprepared Egyptian defence forced during the Omnic Crisis. She was one of the founding members of Overwatch after the organisation recognised her talents, and she was Soldier: 76’s second-in-command during the war. She was believed to have been killed by Widowmaker during a hostage rescue, who shot her through her rifle’s lens, destroying her right eye. Initially choosing to remain out of combat, she soon realised she could not remain on the sidelines and has since rejoined the battle. She is also Pharah’s mother.

 Well, there you have it! I wanted to bring forward descriptions of the characters as well as my own thoughts on them, particularly if there are any people out there who do not know about Overwatch; hopefully now I’ve convinced you with how incredible this game is. I am well and truly hooked.

Jake Epping, a recently divorced high school teacher, leads a relatively insignificant life. Until he receives a call from normally chipper Al from the local dirt cheap diner and finds him dying of an impossibly accelerated bout of cancer, and discovers that Al has been getting his incredibly cheap meat for his food not from the black market but the 1950s. Passing through the portal in the diner’s pantry that leads to 1958, Jake learns that Al’s goal isn’t exactly modest: to stop the assassination of JFK. Can a man from 2011 live in the past for 4 years to make it to 22nd November 1963?

First impressions:  

At first I thought I wouldn’t like this book when I saw it at Penguin, and just picked it up due to Stephen King’s famous name – the Kennedy assassination has been done to death, with movies like Xmen claiming that Magneto curved the bullet to kill or save Kennedy, and as much as I find American history interesting, I felt like I knew the ins and outs of the Kennedy assassination. Boy, was I wrong. From the outset it is obvious that King has done his research, changing facts here and there to suit his narrative, but nevertheless making it seem like we had really gone back in time. This is not only due to the historical and geographical accuracy King determinedly weaves into his story, but the voices of characters that effortlessly come to life, with accents, tones and dialogue that seems flowing, natural and resonates with what we can imagine the historical USA sounded like. Even the littlest of characters have depth and are memorable, even if they are just plot devices – something I admire King about wholeheartedly. Not just this, but when I learnt that this novel was about time travel, I knew I had to read it, as it’s one of my favourite sci-fi genres. What I didn’t expect was the novel to grab my attention right from the outset, even before time travel was introduced.

“Oswald had wrapped his gun in a blanket and hidden it…But when I walked out of Machen’s with mine in my briefcase, I thought I knew how he must have felt: like a man with a powerful secret. A man who owned his own private tornado.”

Thoughts:

In my opinion, King’s theory of time travel is bloody genius. He makes part of his theory almost like a mantra: all through the novel Jake learns, to his frustration and utter detriment, that “the past is obdurate”. Essentially, the past personified, knowing that something is threatening the current future, does all it can to stop the time traveller from making any changes, becoming more dangerous to Jake the bigger a change he attempts to make. A near-miss car crash where the driver is staring blankly ahead, as if in a trance, would seem more of a coincidence or ex machina that the writer has included just to selfishly steer his story in the direction he wants it and to add tension; the obdurate past therefore gives the story real tension, as something is acting against Jake, rather than obstacles getting in the way just because the writer has a plot to follow, making the whole story more believable as a result. This also solves the problem of needing an antagonist to attempt to stop Jake. As he is from the future, he is the only person who knows that Kennedy will be assassinated, and so King’s idea that the past does not want to change and is almost consciously stopping him from completing his task is genius.

Another interesting aspect about his time travel theory is the other half of the mantra, “the past resonates” – so Jake starts to make decisions based on whether he has seen it before in the 4-5 years he has spent in the past, such as the type of guns he buys and decides to use. Also, the ‘rules’ of the portal are also very interesting, as it means he does not simply have free rein over the past, like a regretful God. The portal always leads to the same date and the same time, and once the time traveller has returned through it, they cannot go back without resetting any changes he made on his previous journey. This makes going back into the past a complete reset, so there are no real consequences of changing the past – or so Al thinks. The Yellow Card Man, who is sitting by the portal in the past, changes for Jake, bringing intrigue and mystery into the story right from the outset – Al isn’t completely right in this, so what else isn’t he right about? I just love how King ties all of these time travel elementes together to make a story that is intriguing, exciting, and ultimately overwhelmingly emotional.

Conclusion:

This is my favourite Stephen King book to date, and that’s saying something – The Long Walk, his 1979 dystopian novel written under his pseudonym Richard Bachman, is now a close second in my estimations. Perhaps I loved it so much because of King’s experience, and as he wrote 11.23.1963 in 2011, maybe his writing style has evolved and improved. Perhaps it is the subject matter of time travel, one that has always appealed to me. Whatever the reason, I only wish I had read this novel while doing my dissertation. It would have made me discussion of time travel in my story far more intelligent and compelling. Truly, I am inspired.

I did this last year, and was so happy when it came on my TimeHop and reminded me to do another for 2015. I’ve had such a manic year (as those who read my blog regularly will know!) but I can barely remember the beginning of it! This will be a great way to remind myself of it all. 

So in January James and I cat sat for one of his neighbours, and I had another couple of weeks working at Penguin Random House. 

But definitely the most exciting thing of the month was going with Harriet for the second time to Harry Potter Studios in Watford!!

It was just as good - if not better - than the first time, and as we came around Christmas the Great Hall was decorated so nicely, with trees and flaming Christmas puddings!

Then the month was rounded off by a great night out in Southampton with some of my favourite people.

Thanks guys for nicking my phone ;)

And how can I forget going to one of James’ gigs?

In February, having very little money due to the saving up for our trip, we stayed in, and I was the best housewife ever and made James a Valentine’s meal. Steak with mushroom and red wine sauce and loads of parsnips!

This was around the time George, James and I started going to the gym. I had to include this picture of us being super eager and fit.

At the beginning of March, James, Harriet and I went to the theatre.

And of course, I had to go down and see Beth for her 21st birthday! 

It was around this time that I started my temporary job at Catalina Marketing in Reading. I was on the Operations team, and basically had to help the employees at Sainsbury’s and Morrison’s fix their coupon printers over the phone. I met some really lovely people, and we still keep in touch and go out for sushi (particularly as I helped a couple of them with their Yo! Sushi virginity!). 

Here I am with Abbie and Zoe (or a hobbit and Dorothy) for World Book Day! I’m Katniss if you can’t obviously tell.

This is Tyler, another one of my work mates, holding up a cut out of Helen Small - what have you done today to make you feeeel proud?!

Apparently nothing interesting happened to me in April. Yay. So here’s a couple of pictures of my grown up cats!

In May I had a BBQ with the Catalina lot, as I had to finish my time with them - wahh!

And I traveled down to Soton again for Frankie’s 21st birthday. 

I had a tooth operation this month too, so I spent quite a lot of time walking in the sunny weather and whining because I couldn’t eat any nice food. 

In June, James and I celebrated with a meal when we had finally paid off all of our flights and other expenses for travelling! Yay!

I also worked Royal Ascot again, which was looong but I got great tips. :D

And another of James’ gigs! (Circadian)

Mum and I also took Harriet to see Mamma Mia! in the West End for her 18th birthday.

In July Stacey and I went walking in the summer heat...

...James, Stacey, George and I went for 1/3 off Chiquitos, as I was working there at the time...

...and I went to see Beth for the last time before I could see her again in December!

(the Roulette Doritos!)

And, very importantly, my nephew, Lucas, was born on the 14th of July. 

In August, it was time to round things up, get ready for travelling, and say goodbye to people. :(

James and I went to Windsor Races, with the free ticket he got from the raffle at the Squirrels:

Harriet got her A Level results and got into Warwick University to study history!!

She looks SO HAPPY. 

We had a going away party, which was honestly one of my most fun times of the year. We played beer pong, and Damian made the most incredible trick shot off the ceiling to win the game! I’m not sure why I didn’t take any pictures, but here’s one of George and Rosie!

On the 20th of August, we embarked on our 4 month trip.

Of course, I’ve already done numerous blogs on our trip, so I’ll just limit it to a photo an area!

In August we were in Iceland and New York.

In September, we were in New York, Chicago, LA, Las Vegas, and of course Disneyland!

In October, we had already been in Fiji for a couple of days, and we were also in New Zealand, the Gold Coast and Brisbane.

In November we were in Sydney, Kuala Lumpur, Bangkok and Chiang Mai. 

This elephant day we had in Chiang Mai was for our 6th Anniversary as well. ^-^

In December we were in Hong Kong and Dubai.

And then, of course, on the 14th of December we came home! We had a lovely homecoming by George and Stacey ^-^ 

Since being back, I’ve had a lovely time seeing everyone again. We had a coming home/birthday party:

I also had a nice and quiet 23rd birthday, hanging out with George, Stacey, James and Harriet, and going for drinks. 

And I had a lovely Christmas at James’ and with my new nephew of course! Who now actually looks human now he’s over 5 months old ;)

So that’s my year! It’s been so interesting, and I finally got to fulfil my dream of travelling the world. 

What’s for this year? HOUSE.

Hello everybody, for the last time - at least in this series! Our last around-the-world adventure. We’ve been back for two weeks now, and it’s been manic leading up to Christmas, but I have to finish what we started!

After the miserable weather of Hong Kong, I was delighted to be back in the sun. But first, we had to get there! We got up at 3.15am to grab the bus to the airport (killer!) and we got a McDonald’s breakfast while there. Not all bad though, as we got some Snoopy pillows for James’ mum, as they were being sold as Happy Meal toys there!

We had a nine hour flight with two lovely meals, and got to Dubai with a four hour time difference. Everywhere we looked there was impressive architecture, showing the wealth of the country of course. 

However, it wasn’t as easy as just getting to our AirBnB - our host hadn’t contacted us for a couple of months, and we thought we’d just get to Dubai and hope for the best. Nope! We ended up sitting in the mall, sipping milkshakes, ringing AirBnB to get a refund so that we could book a new room for that night. Thankfully, within a couple of hours it was all straightened out, we got our money back, and the woman who we had contacted about our new location was very efficient and said we could go to hers as early as 6pm that night! 

So, we got on a train (back the way we just came, haha...) and dropped our bags at the apartment before heading off for dinner so that our host could finish preparing the room. And I’m so glad we did!

We found the nicest restaurant, where the manager himself took us around and introduced all of the sweet pastries they had and talked us through the menu. We ended up eating here every day after this!

While I had a margarita pizza, James had shawarma - this is an Arab dish: basically kebab meat in a wrap, to put it simply, but really it’s nothing like kebab. It’s delicious! No idea what meat exactly we were eating, but we got a bit addicted. 

Our room was just lovely as well. It was really big, and we even had our own bathroom just off the hallway. 

On our first full day, we went into Dubai (our AirBnB is technically not in Dubai, but in Ajman, one of the other United Arab Emirates). 

We tried to go up the Burj Kalifa, the tallest building in the world which stands at 830 metres to the tip, but it would have cost us 500 Dirham! That’s £100 each! So we decided to skip it, and just admire it from afar, especially as we had been up loads of sky towers during our trip.

We then went to the Dubai Mall, which was definitely the most impressive mall that we saw around the world. It was massive and really posh, but still very interesting - so many malls we saw had loads of designer shops in and not much else, but there was so much to see in this one.

They had a giant aquarium right in the middle of it, with sharks and sting rays and all sorts!

We visited loads of the shops, including an incredible French biscuit shop, where we fell in love with the caramel biscuits and had to get pick ‘n’ mix biscuits to take away, and a brilliant candy shop where they were actually making the candy. 

There was just so much to see - they even had one of the most complete diplodocus skeletons right in the middle of their cultural part of the mall!

We then went to the Cheesecake Factory, which of course we first sampled in LA. We got the ‘dinner’ rather than the ‘lunch’ portions, which I really don’t think we needed! We didn’t even have room for cheesecake!

It was definitely a very pretty restaurant too!

James in particular was very excited about the SEGA Republic area of the mall - Sonic was even there to greet him! And of course, once we saw that there was a mssive toy store in the mall, we just had to go - though James doesn’t look that enamoured to be attacked by bubbles. 

The only bad thing about this day (other than the expensive Kalifa, of course) was that we tried to get the bus, but the bus driver wouldn’t let us on before the men, so we didn’t get on as there wasn’t enough room! Bloody mysogeny! 

We really wanted to go into the desert at some point, so our lovely host booked it for us, and we were to be picked up from outside the hotel opposite the apartment at 3.30pm. So we went for a big breakfast at the restaurant!

It was so massive! We got the Palestinian breakfast for two, and we had so much food, like bread, falafel, olives, chick peas, savoury pastries, oils, spices and tea. It was so scrummy, but we couldn’t finish it all - we had to take some of it back to the apartment afterwards! 

Then it got to the afternoon, and we were picked up by a guy in a jeep and taken out about 45 minutes away. We pulled up on the side of the road, next to the desert, and it was all very odd that we were on our own - we weren’t sure what to expect! But soon we were paired up with a couple with their three kids, bundled into another jeep with another man in traditional Arabic dress, and we were off into the desert.

Oh my God, I nearly died. He was going up and down the sand dunes at speed, waves of sand pouring over us, and more than once I thought we were going to flip over. The kids were loving it, but I was just glad I took sickness tablets - I was probably very pale by the end of it!

When we got to this campsite, though, it was great. We rode a camel and got our photo taken, I got some henna, and just wandered around having a look. It was actually really chilly out there at night too! 

We were then fed, and treated to a bunch of performances on the massive stage. There was a man on stilts, a panto horse, a fire dancer, a spinner (who was incredible), and a belly dancer. It was all very interactive, and they put on a great show. 

We then headed back, thankfully without another sand dune rollercoaster ride!

On our final full day in Dubai (and travelling, ahhhh!) we went to one of the posh hotels across the road from us to have a lovely relaxing day in the sun. 

We had to pay for the privilege, but it was lovely having such a calm last day - especially knowing we had to go back to 9 degree weather! 

We then had dinner at the restaurant, and went home and chilled out for the evening.

Our last day. Sob! We got breakfast at the restaurant, and was actually given free bread, which was lovely! The most hilarious thing was that, on our very last day, the taxi driver asked James, “Are you a Muslim, my friend?” because of his massive travelling beard!!

We got on the plane at 2.30pm, got fed scones (that’s how you know you’re going home!) and got into Heathrow at 6.30pm - though to us it was 10.30. And our amazing friends, George and Stacey, picked us up. It really was lovely to be home.

So that’s it! We saw whales in Iceland, travelled across the USA (and went to Disneyland!!), swum with manta rays in Fiji, hung out with hobbits in New Zealand, fed kangaroos in Australia, went into the rainforest in Malaysia, played with elephants in Thailand, and went into the desert in Dubai. I am just so glad that we’ve documented all that we’ve done on this blog, not only for the memories, but because otherwise I’d struggle to remember all the incredible things we’ve done! It was an inspiring, incredible, exciting experience, and we’ll never forget it. It’s hard to put into words how amazing it was, but this blog does it for us. 

Merry Christmas!

The best and cheapest way to get to the North (Chiang Mai) from the South (Bangkok) seemed to be to get the overnight train for only £18. So that’s exactly what we did!

We shared this four bed compartment with a very nice American couple and took advantage of the dining carriage for Thai soups and curries with rice and fruit. The whole experience was much nicer than we thought it would be! The trip was bumpy  and noisy, but we still managed to get some sleep. Any trip would seem okay now anyway, after our 26 and 42 hour trips across America on Amtrak without any beds.

When we arrived in Chiang Mai, we soon learnt how much cheaper, less humid, and less crowded it was in comparison to Bangkok. It is very much a relaxing holiday destination, unlike Bangkok, but there’s still plenty to do.

We got one of their red taxis to our hotel at 8.40am – in Thailand, we had learnt not to get into a ‘normal’ taxi as the drivers refuse to use their meters and try to charge you an extortionate amount. Plus, tuk-tuks are great fun!

When we got to the hotel and could eventually check in at midday, we saw how lovely it was! It’s amazing what you can get for your money in Thailand.

We got lunch at the hotel, and in the evening made our way to the night market, which is one of the highlights of Chiang Mai. We went the wrong way at first, and for the first time ever, got pooed on by a bird. The woman we found at a smoothie café who gave me baby wipes to clean myself up told me it was good luck. Sigh. Travelling is full of new experiences.

The night market was brilliant. There are loads of stalls, just like at the weekend market in Bangkok, and the food bit of the market was one of my favourite places in Chiang Mai. There are lots of stalls selling Thai food, sushi, pizza, burgers, and cocktails, and there’s always live music playing in the centre.

We got cocktails and satay from the Cowboy Satay stand, which has been hailed on the internet as one of the best places to eat in Chiang Mai – and we weren’t disappointed!

We then got a tuk-tuk ride home. Tuk-tuks are basically motorbikes with a roof and a seat in the back for two people, and it’s great, zooming along the roads with the wind whipping at you, weaving in and out of all the cars with the mopeds.

On our first full day in Chiang Mai, we decided to just have a look around where we were staying. We got breakfast in a café of scrambled eggs and toast and pancakes and smoothies, and then found a bookshop where, if you buy a book and then give it back when you’ve finished, you get half your money back to spend on a new book.

This day was the first day we went into a bar called John’s Place. It was very cheap, sold lovely cocktails, and had the best wifi we’d seen in a long time! Every time we went I’d have a couple of Chiang Mai Paradises, which were cocktails with Baileys, Kahlua, Cointreau and milk, and James would either join me or have beer. We went back to that bar nearly every day after that!

On Friday the 20th we took a cooking course at one of the earliest cooking schools in Chiang Mai (although, most of them claimed to be the ‘earliest’). It was a brilliant day. We paid 1000B (£20) each, which included pick up from and drop off to the hotel, a trip to the market to learn about the ingredients the Thai use in their cooking and help buy them, and we got to cook six dishes each.

We met a couple from England in the bus who were lovely, and a guy from Washington DC, and we sat with them around the tables that had been laid out for us in the eating room. In this room we had to take off our shoes and sit at low tables on pillows to eat our creations.

Here’s the itinerary of the day:

1. Soup – James made coconut chicken soup; I made Thai herb soup. 2. Curry sauce and curry (which counted as two different dishes) – James made Chiang Mai noodles; I made green curry. 3. Noodles – James made pad thai; I made chicken and cashew nut.

Here the others who were only there for a half day course went home (like our new friends).

4. Appetisers – James made chicken satay; I made spring rolls (which are actually brilliant and pretty easy to make!). 5. Dessert – James made sticky rice and mango; I made black rice pudding.

Whoever chose what dish had a different teacher, and it was very fast paced! We really had to keep up with the teacher. We actually learnt you cook the dishes for a lot less time than you think, other than the curry, which has to be left to simmer, and the rice.

At the end of the day we got certificates and official cooking books with all the recipes in it. James’ certificate actually called him ‘Jame Skinner’ ha! Apparently we can now open Thai restaurants back home. ;)

The next couple of days were very chilled out, as James felt ill and the Temples are occupied for worship on Sundays, so we went out for breakfast and then spent the majority of the two days in John’s Place again.

However, Thai law states they cannot serve beer or whiskey between 2 and 5pm (but it’s okay to serve it from 11am-2pm? What??), so we didn’t spend all of our time drinking…

I had seen a beautiful-looking restaurant on our journeys around town in our tuk-tuks, with red lanterns hanging from the ceiling, so I had made it my mission to look for it. When we eventually found it, I was apprehensive as it was actually called Hot Chilli – spicy food is definitely not my strong suit! But we went, and as long as I requested it to be mai pet (not spicy), it was fine! In fact it was delicious. We had stuffed squid, noodles, marinated chicken, and pork skewers.

^ this isn’t the exact squid/cuttlefishI had, but I needed to take a picture of it. It would never be served this way in England! But the tentacles are actually the best bit.

The next day, on Monday the 23rd of November, was our sixth anniversary.

We were up at 7am to go and see the elephants. We had chosen our elephant sanctuary carefully, as we had heard horrible stories about elephants being abused when humans train them to be ridden. We chose Hug Elephants.

The bus ride was very bumpy, maybe because we had to ride sideways for two hours, but it was worth it when we got there.

The first thing we saw was a monkey chained up, which I had to question as soon as I could. Apparently it attacks women, and so has to be chained up when visitors are there, but can run around at other times. We still didn’t like it very much!

We were then told by our guides some facts about the elephants: how riding them is very bad for them, if they push you away with their trunks it’s time to back off, don’t tease them with the food, and don’t just feed the baby ones. Apparently Big Mama gets offended if you just feed her baby, as she needs to eat a lot more than it – 300 kilograms a day!

We then went up the hill to meet the elephants with bags of sugar cane. The first thing that hit me was just how big they are. We kept having to get out of their way if they decided to move!

We then came down for some lunch consisting of fried chicken, spaghetti, soup and fruit. It seemed like we were wasting a lot of time not with the elephants, but of course they needed to rest and keep to themselves a bit too.

We then went on a trek with the elephants. They kept stopping along the way to grab massive leaves from the trees and to drink from the stream! It sounds silly but I loved the noise of the elephants crunching away.

We went with them to the mud pit, where they rolled around and slapped it onto themselves with their trunks (as makeshift suncream) – getting all of us in the process! We were so messy by that point, and James and I were some of the first in the nearby river to clean off, after throwing mud onto the elephants ourselves.

When they fancied it, the elephants gallomphed into the river and here they looked truly happy, splashing and rolling around. They even started trumpeting! James has a lot of footage on his underwater camera – we can’t wait to see what we recorded!

We then trekked to the waterfall, drying off very quickly in the hot sun.

James was having issues trying to get away from this very friendly dog, who obviously had fleas!

We then went back to the hotel via bus, and after we showered, we headed out for our anniversary dinner. Sadly, the place we wanted to go was shut, so we just went for a cheap meal in town and had drinks at John’s Place, and promised to have our proper anniversary meal another day.

We had such an amazing day. Who else can say they’ve played with elephants on their anniversary? We’ve been having brilliant adventures for the last three months, but to have one of the best days on our anniversary was very special.

The 24th-26th were the festival days in Chiang Mai, celebrating Yee Pong and Loy Krathong – the festival of lights.

We went to the opening ceremony by Tha Pae Gate, which was a huge procession with hundreds of Thai people in traditional clothing. Admittedly, we didn’t stay to watch it for long, and went to the night market to get food instead. But even when we’d finished and started to go home, two hours later, the parade had only just reached the night market!

The next day we went on a self-guided tour around Chiang Mai’s most notable landscapes. We started at number 8 and went backwards, as the Suan Prung Gate was the closest to our hotel. Apparently this gate was built in the 15th century, way later than the other gates, by a King of Chiang Mai so that his mother could not enter the city directly! There’s a tradition of carrying dead people for cremation through this gate.

7. Suan Buak Haad

This was a beautiful park, with many joggers and people doing yoga, and a lot of pigeons roosting all around. It’s the site of the annual Flower Festival Parade in February.

6. Wat Phuak Hong – a temple that is translated to the Monastery of the Flight of Swans.

5. Wat Phra Singh – Chiang Mai’s most important and sacred image of the Buddha, the Phra Buddha Singh, is housed in the assembly hall of this temple. It was constructed by King Pha Yu to contain the ashes of his father in the 14th century.

We spent ages trying to figure out if this guy was real! (He's not.)

Here we accidentally found 2. Wat Chedi Luang and went in because we thought it looked beautiful. It was the nicest Temple we had seen so far! It’s a ruin of a Temple, and its construction was completed by 1475.

There were also lots of hot air balloons being let off, which would release little airplanes that would spin in the air and trail smoke! 

We managed to miss 4. Central Police Station Monument somehow, but instead we went to 3. Three Kings Monument.

It is dedicated to the three Northen Lao Kings who founded Chiang Mai, and it is the venue of the King’s birthday celebrations in December.

We then took a detour to a Temple that wasn’t on the list, Wat Chiang Man, which I wanted to go to because it is the oldest Temple in Chiang Mai. It was built by the Lanna King Mengrai who laid the foundations of the city in 1296.

Our last stop was Tha Pae Gate, but of course we had visited this landmark many times. It was built in 1296 too.

We finished our tour at 12.30pm and went for drinks, before heading back to the hotel for a little siesta.

We went to Casa Diverso for dinner, which was the restaurant we wanted to go to on our anniversary. It was absolutely lovely! We had garlic shrimp, chicken liver pate, duck in plum sauce with fries, chicken cashew with rice, two brownies, and an alcoholic drink each, all for under £20!

At the end, the waiter actually gave us two lanterns for the Yee Pang festival for free!

We then took a tuk-tuk to Tha Pae Gate and saw the lanterns being let off in the sky.

We of course had to do the same, so we let off the lanterns in the shadow of a Temple.

On our way home, we saw a woman selling tiny whicker cages. Sadly, they had little birds in them, to be set free for good luck. We had to buy at least one to let them go.

The next day we moved from Chana Place, our first hotel, to Raming Hotel, which is right by Tha Pae Gate! We spent a little more, £30 a night, and managed to get much better service, breakfast included, and a pool!

That evening we went out into town and saw the Loy Krathong closing ceremony procession, and then had to run home to get out of the torrential rain that had started!

The next couple of days was full of sunbathing by the pool, drinking at John’s Place, and getting dinner in various places that were tried and tested, like the night market and Hot Chilli.

The 29th was the day we had to leave Chiang Mai. So of course we checked out and went for a last drink at John’s Place, and we also had a late lunch to tide us over for the long journey on the train. The train was different to last time, and we didn’t have a private carriage. It turned out we needed one – the snoring in this one was so loud!

When we arrived in Bangkok, it turned out we were in the bit of Bangkok that waas near the Grand Palace, and as we were running out of Baht by this point, we decided to stay in the area rather than spend money to get to the station every day. 

We went to see the Hunger Games in the cinema on the 30th, and maybe it was a good choice - as you could either see it in Thai or in English with Thai subtitles, there weren’t that many people in the English showing. There was a man snoring a couple of people own though!

The department store we were in was massive, and we also got all you can eat sushi for £13 all together! My favourite! 

The only things we did here was visit Khao San Road, the busy market street, for cocktails, and try some of the local food.  We nearly got made to ive money away though for some crappy palm reading and some slight of hand by some Indian men. 

The next two days we had two massages each - Thai and oil for James, and oil and aroma for me. I don’t know how James manages to fall asleep during them though - they beat you up quite a lot! 

So were off to Hong Kong tomorrow, and I’m really excited to go somewhere new! But I can’t help but keep realising how close we are to home - less than two weeks left! What?!

We now headed into what I refer to as the ‘last third’ of our trip: Asia. We had got a bit bored of Western culture, and we were looking forward to experiencing something different, like we did in Fiji.

Even our flight from Sydney to Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, was great, and made me more excited for Asian food – the airplane meals were the best we’d ever had, with noodles and rice and seafood and two types of pudding!

We got in at about 11pm, and to us it was the early hours of the morning due to the time difference, so we fell asleep pretty much immediately. But not before we noticed how nice our AirBnB was – we were sharing a condo with two other couples, with our own bathroom and television with a database of movies, right in the middle of Kuala Lumpur.

The view from our condo:

The next morning we hit the ground running, as we didn’t have long to explore the city. The first few things we noticed: there are a LOT of Western shopping malls in big Asian cities; the restaurants and stalls, for the most part, are much healthier; every time you cross the road is a gamble with your life, as even pedestrian crossings aren’t seen as a safe place to cross; and unless otherwise told, it is not the norm to queue (but this might not be an Asian thing – us Brits just love to queue!).

But to find all this out, we first had to get into the centre, and we decided to walk. Much like when we went to Paris, we realised that just because we could see the Patronus Twin Towers at the centre of the city, it didn’t mean it was anywhere near us. We walked in over 90% humidity for an hour, getting lost and sweaty (and I ripped my lovely trousers, RIP), but eventually we found the bustling part of the city and started to enjoy ourselves!

So most of the city seems to be set in giant shopping malls. We found one and found that the Deepawali celebrations were underway, with lovely coloured rice pictures on the floors.

We got smoothies for breakfast, as we had to start taking our malaria tablets – stuff’s getting real now!

And what’s one of the first things we do on arrival in an Eastern country? Go and see the new British film that’s just come out – Spectre! For the upgraded seats, it cost us 14 Ringet Malaysian (RM) each, which is about £2.10! It was a great film, but it was a really odd environment – everyone kept talking throughout the film, and the film itself is REALLY loud, probably to make up for it.

We then wandered around the grounds outside of the shopping malls, and found the park. Here was a massive fountain and a swimming pool for children – it was very beautiful.

We headed over to ‘KL’s Time Square’ after that, and were surprised to see the very pretty Christmas decorations, coupled quite nicely with a lovely ramen bowl fountain!

The decorations were at the entrance to a shopping centre, and there we found a 1 Michelin star Chinese restaurant, where we got a six course meal for 55 RM/£8.30 each! After trying such amazing food, like the ramen with lots of unusual ingredients and the Chinese pork buns, I’m sure getting a Chinese in England will never be the same again!

Afterwards, we went back to the Petronus Twin Towers, where we had booked our time for 5pm to go up to the skywalk and the summit, so that we could see the whole of Kuala Lumpur.

We went up to the 42nd floor first to the walkway between the two towers…

They then took us up to the 82nd floor, 320 metres above ground, and they definitely made it more of an experience than we had up any of the other towers we’d been up around the world. We had interactive tickets that we could use in a camera to find out about the history of the towers…

…and they had models of their landmarks throughout the city.

After looking around the shopping mall near Times Square, we went back via the monorail.

The Malaysians definitely know how to make the use of room, and squeeze into the trains as much as they can! At least the stations had fans all around, to save us from the 34 degree humidity.

The next day we went to the Times Square building, rather than the area – confusing eh? – and it was the biggest shopping mall in the whole of KL. There are ten floors of shops, so big that they were labelled East, West and Centre.

The theme was great, with a ‘Central Park’ area…

…and there was even a theme park with working roller coasters!

Obviously we didn’t want to spend our whole visit in shopping centres, so we then went to find the KL National Park, where a ‘city rainforest’ was located. We did the trek through the rainforest, where it was even more humid, and we got bitten to pieces by mosquitos haha! For some reason, James got bitten a lot more than I did, and got one so big it bruised. Or so I thought – my bites came up a couple of days later! I’m glad we went though, as we’ve been through a real rainforest!

We ended up at the KL sky tower, but didn’t bother going up, as we’ve been up so many! We got the shuttle back into town though, and went to the Tokyo section of a mall, where we found out what shabu-shabu is.

It’s definitely one of my new favourite things. It’s thinly sliced raw meat with vegetables and sushi and other meats like pork balls and crab claws, and you cook the meat slices in broth that’s set in front of you on a hot plate. It was so delicious, and I loved seasoning the broth with whatever I wanted. Plus, the one we went to was all you can eat! I’m so glad I’ve learnt how to use chop sticks now, but this particular meal was still pretty messy.

We had only got out £60 each for the whole three days, and we were getting to the end of it, so we went back to the AirBnB. And good thing, too, as a huge thunderstorm erupted soon after we got back!

So what’s the logical thing you do in a thunderstorm? Go out into the building swimming pool, of course! It was pretty surreal, swimming in a storm, and James has some pretty cool footage on his Go Pro for when we get back.

The next day, the 12th, was our last in Malaysia, and after we went back to the Times Square mall for breakfast, we went to the airport and got a Malaysian lunch. We had a two and a half hour flight to Bangkok, and after taking an Uber to the centre (500 Baht (B) for over an hour – that’s only £10!), we arrived at our hotel in Sukhumvit, MHC Guest House.

It was a lovely, tiny guest house, owned by an ex British pilot – hence its name, the Mile High Guest House. We met him the next day, and he gave us some ideas on what to do and where to go in Bangkok. As it was already 9pm, we went to a restaurant down the road, which was great because it was cheap, tasty, and best of all, called ‘Thai Food Very Good And Cheap’!

The main differences between Malaysia and Thailand: the street vendors that line all roads in Bangkok with coconuts and fish balls on a stick and noodles; Thailand is a Buddhist country, and so while the women have to cover up their shoulders and legs in sacred places, they don’t need to wear head scarves like the predominantly Islamic Malaysians; you have to walk single file along the pavements in Bangkok, or you risk getting run over by the motorbikes riding on the pavements as well as the roads; and lastly, a lot less people speak English in Thailand than Malaysia.

After our full English-y breakfast that we had in the Guest House, we walked the three Sois (roads) to Terminal 21, which both Trip Advisor and our host had said was the best shopping centre in Bangkok. It was themed like an airport, with gates instead of entrances and the different floors were based on different cities – Rome, Paris, Tokyo, even London!

Random picture of a bidet - they're in a lot of the public toilets! This is one of the posher ones: some are just little hoses.

We’ve seen Thai massage businesses everywhere, even in England, and we’ve never had any massages before. So we thought, when in Rome – or when in Thailand – right? So we got two traditional Thai massages at the massage school just around the corner. It was 200B for an hour, and we got completely beaten up, it was great!

We then got dinner at a very cheap Chinese and Thai place, and the next day, we went to the infamous weekend market, where it seems most of Bangkok go. Before we went, we were told that no-one knows what they’re going for, but they come away with a lot of stuff they didn’t expect to get. And we certainly did!

There were more than 8000 stalls, split up into 27 sections, with everything you could possibly want.

Needless to say, we bought some funky Thai trousers. James split his almost as soon as he tried them on and so we needed to buy more - ‘free size’ ' in Thailand is definitely too small for a 6′2 man! We needed them to cover up to get into the more sacred places in Thailand, the temples, and I also got shorts and a couple of geeky shirts (as per usual). We also got some other little trinkets, and we barely spent a thing! As we read online before we went, you don't go to the market with anything in mind, but you end up leaving with random things you never expected to buy! 

Here’s us with coconut ice cream, served in half a coconut with peanuts and coloured sticky rice (which is actually, weirdly, a great combination!).

We then went back to Terminal 21 and got some food from the food court, as a meal is around 40B (73p) a time – a lot cheaper than the main restaurants. We actually had two meals each, as it was so nice! Being in Asia is really reaffirming my belief that Asian food is brilliant. We really need to start using some of their recipes in England and stop Westernising them so much, as the spices give the soups amazing flavour.

We got back to the room, and our air conditioning was broken. Definitely not okay in such a humid place! But the Guest House couldn’t do enough to help us, and got a man out within an hour of our complaints. Bet you couldn’t get that in England!

On the 15th, the Sunday, we had more of a chilled out day and just went window shopping in the massive shopping malls. On the way there we passed the little lake we have to go past every day to get to the station, and we actually saw turtles on the rocks!

We also went to a very posh shopping centre very close to our hotel for dinner. There are three parts to the centre, and the Hexagon is where the restaurants are, going up in a non-stop Helix shape from floor 6 to 9. We had a delicious Thai meal of noodles for James and soup for me, with dumplings and pork balls, and then afterwards we got ice cream and went back to the fifth floor.

There’s a whole Chinese botanical garden on this floor, and we sat in the bamboo loveseats to eat, and took in the view.

On the Monday we put on our ‘respectable clothes’ covering our legs and shoulders and set out to see the temples.

We had to get the train to Siam, then change to go to the Chao Phraya river. We got on the river boat for 150B each for the whole day, and got off at the eighth pier for Wat Po temple – also known as the Temple of the Reclining Buddha.

[river boat]

The buildings and the statues were massive, and intricate. I think photos will speak much clearer than what I can say, so here’s what we saw at Wat Po:

Mr Reclining Buddha himself! His body ran the length of the enormous temple.

Whenever entering a holy place, the visitor has to take off their shoes, and if they don’t have the right attire, they were either denied access or made to put on sarongs to cover up. One middle aged Thai woman in shorts got hit and yelled at by an angry security guard with an umbrella, even when she was trying to put her sarong on!

We then went to the Grand Palace, which was even more impressive!

These great ladies all have some fine shoes and trousers!

We paid 500B (£10) each to get in and the statues and murals on the walls reminded me of The King and I – a film I love.

As it was raining, we headed back along the river via the riverside market, and stopped off in Siam on the way back to get some Vietnamese food.

When we got back, our air conditioner was still not working despite another engineer coming in to fix it, so the manager very kindly washed all of our clothes for free!

Asia, so far, has been great. It's really not like we think - it's modern, fast-paced, and despite the humidity, a great place for a holiday! Of course there are some older traditions we couldn't understand but, apart from some of the backwards views regarding women, they all add to the charm of Asia. We’re in Chiang Mai now, and despite its quieter atmosphere, it's still up-to-date.

Hoping to have a good relax here after the massive cities of Kuala Lumpur and Bangkok! Speak to you all soon! 

Finally, here we are in one of the most iconic places in the world: Sydney!

We were so happy to be leaving our crazy Brisbane host behind that we left earlier than check out and played Magic: The Gathering in a cute little café until it was time for us to go to the airport.

When we got to Sydney after a very jerky flight (no wonder the babies around us were screaming so much!) we met our lovely host who immediately restored our faith in AirBnB. We were so close to the train station in her place as well – it was practically on her doorstep!

It was late when we checked in, so we went out for dinner that night to an Irish pub ($12/£6 steak and guinness pie with mash!) where they were holding a pub quiz, and got our food for the week.

The next day we ventured out into the city and I was completely in awe with the double decker trains and the moveable seats, so that you could face whatever way you want. Yes, I am impressed easily.

We stopped off at Town Square, as we wanted to go and visit a geek shop, and I’m so glad we did – the station was so big and beautiful! It would have been impressive anyway due to the big clock in the middle telling not only the time but the history of Australia…

…but there was also lovely Christmas decorations everywhere. It’s certainly getting us into the Christmas spirit, despite the fact we’re all the way on the other side of the world!

We then went to Circular Quay to visit the Sydney Opera House. However, it was raining heavily, and the pictures we got didn’t show off its magnificence!

It was the day of the greatly celebrated Melbourne Cup (horse racing) and, despite the rain, so many people were dressed up in full Ascot clothing just to watch the race in pubs across Sydney! Bear in mind Melbourne is in the South and Sydney in the East, a 9 hour drive away! The security guard for the Opera House even called them stupid haha! We thought we’d join the hoard in our not so fancy travelling gear and get a drink in a pub with them.

On the Wednesday we thought we’d do the standard city thing and we went to the aquarium and the museum.

The aquarium was so busy, with loads of kids running around (probably because of the horrible weather) but we did see some awesome dugongs. I must admit, I felt bad such large animals were kept there, though.

The museum was great too, telling us all about Australia’s animals and the dinosaurs that used to roam there.

Using my incredible chocolate radar, we found a Lindt café and their pick ‘n’ mix was on sale - $14.99 (£7) for $52 (£24) worth of chocolate! Needless to say we bought a whole box!

We got caught in a storm after that, but we did fight our way through to the Opera house to book some tickets. We wanted to see something cultural, and so we opted for the ballet. Luckily, our internet at the AirBnB wasn’t good enough to let us book our tickets over the web, so we talked to one of the box office men and he told us that the ‘best seats in the house’ for the following night were available as someone had just dropped out! Why not eh?

The next day we visited the Rocks, which is a cute little area with cobblestones and quaint cafés near the docks, and the Sydney harbour bridge, which we walked along. There were some really good views, even though it was overcast!

After we walked around a few shops and had sushi in Newtown, we went home to change into some smarter clothes and went back to the Opera House to see the ballet.

It was brilliant! We were so close to the stage so we could see everything, and the couple sitting beside us knew us as the ‘backpackers’ (obviously word had got around about our luck!). As you can imagine, it was very posh, and even the announcements to go back into the theatre after the two intervals were preceded by a fanfare!  

Our first sunny day was Friday, and so we went to Bondi Beach.

It was so busy – the queues for the many buses snaked all the way around the terminal! Though the beach was absolutely beautiful.

They had a exhibition of ‘sculptures on the beach’, which is exactly as it sounds: you could look at the modern art dotted along the cliff/beach walk all the way up to the picnic area. I have no idea why there was a pub from Middle Earth up there though!

Again, probably due to the weather, it was so busy, and so we went along the Bondi strip to look at the shops.

I’m sure you’ve seen the amazing cloud shelf that we saw on Bondi Beach in Sydney – and here’s the picture James took of it! Can’t believe we happened to be there on that date!

We managed to leave Bondi just in time before the sky opened up, and went home for a lazy evening.

One of the things we knew we had to do when visiting Sydney was find the famous Nutella doughnut milkshakes, and that’s what we sought on the 7th. They were incredible, but very sickly!

We then went to Darling Harbour and Cockle Bay, which in my opinion was the prettiest place in Sydney.

James is a swan! 

The Japanese culture festival was being held, and so we looked around at the Japanese in cosplay and got some traditional street food, such as chocolate covered bananas and squid and vegetable kebabs.

We got a cocktail at happy hour, and then went to go and see The Martian for $35 (£16) each in their IMAX theatre.

It’s the biggest IMAX screen in the whole world, so we took that as a good excuse to go to the cinema! Weirdly, M15 (Mature 15) here means like 12A does back in England – parents can take their young children into a 15 rated film if they deem it suitable.

We then got dinner in an Italian on the wharf – 3 courses and an alcoholic drink for $30 (£14) each!

At 8.30pm, we stayed to see the beautiful fireworks in the harbour.

The 8th and 9th saw us trying to find where Captain Cook first found fresh water when he arrived in Australia. We were going to go to Botany Bay, but according to the locals, it isn’t really a tourist spot, while the Tank Stream is. It was a Sunday on the 8th, so it was closed, but we went back the next day, where it is hidden away in the GPO building in a restaurant.

So on the 9th we set off to escape Western culture and go and experience Asia! We’ll update you with our Asian antics soon – it really is so different from the West.

We’ve finally made it to Australia - the place pretty much every person we’ve ever met who is doing a year working and travelling has gone to. And we can see why - it’s exciting and the wages aren’t bad at all! 

The first thing we noticed when we arrived at Brisbane airport, took the train and arrived at the Gold oast, was the brilliant animals everywhere. In the middle of the treet you’re walking past big birds like the Australian Ibis, and you’re constantly making sure not to step on massive lizards (we think they’re either bearded dragons or - let us know if any of you have an idea!).

We arrived at our host’s home, and it and she were just lovely - she had loads of information about the area, and as we learnt over the next five days, Surfer’s Paradise is definitely the most exciting bit of the Gold Coast!

We were completely knackered after our flight so got food and had a lazy day, but the next day, we went for a walk along the beach at Surfer’s Paradise and got drinks and a $10 lunch at a little restaurant in the main shopping stretch. 

On Wednesday, the weather took a turn for the worst. We decided to go to Broadbeach, another area of the Gold Coast, but halfway there it started raining so heavily our waterproof Gortex shoes were completely sodden! We took refuge in a shopping centre in the middle of town, and got a couple of drinks while waiting for our socks to dry out a little bit.

The Gold Coast is well known for its theme parks, and so with my motion sickness, we decided to go to a water park rather than a proper theme park, called Wet ‘N’ Wild. It was pretty cold with the overcast sky, but due to this it wasn’t very busy at all, and we didn’t have to wait for any queues!

I went on all the tame rides, being boring, while James went on a massive banana boat ride that he said was the scariest ride he’d ever been on! I also went down a slide backwards in a giant rubber ring and felt sick for a good hour after that. Oops.

It was pretty great though! There were massive Australian crows everywhere, making our own look feeble in comparison, and we liked the slow-moving rapids where you could sit and relax in one of the hundreds of colourful rubber rings. 

Our favourite ride (collectively) was the racing slide, where James won 2-1. Boooo.

It was pretty chilly, so we went in the wave pool and then went back to Surfer’s for drinks. 

Surfer’s Paradise is in the middle of the Gold Coast, so while we went to Broadbeach to the south previously, on Friday we went north towards Main Beach. It was disappointing – there was only a few posh cafes and shops and not much to do there. So we went back to Surfer’s to an Irish pub, where all the waitresses were actually Irish! The steak and chips for $12.50 (£5.80) weren’t bad either! 

At the weekend we headed towards Brisbane, where we met the most insane and bipolar woman ever – and not in a funny way. Our Air BnB host drunk a good couple of bottles of wine a night and as a result was constantly pissed, and one minute she’d be angrily telling us off for not putting the toilet seat down and the next chatting to us for over an hour about our day and the travelling she used to do when she was younger. She was also a 71-year-old tarot reader and kept telling us what our star signs meant. We were so glad we only had to stay with her for a couple of days! 

So we got to Brisbane, after arguing with our host about the fact that we couldn’t determine exactly when we were going to arrive because we were coming via public transport, and immediately headed out to see the sights. We went to the Brisbane museum, where we learned all about the indigenous species in the country, like their big birds, snakes and mammals, and also about the dinosaurs that lived in Australia millions of years ago.

We had $10 (£4.70) pizza and a drink in a little café, and then headed over to the art gallery, which again was full of Australian art. The modern art gallery was closed for renovations however, thank God!

We then went into town – we had to cross the bridge to get there, and we sat in the town plaza, watching all of the people in Halloween costumes wander towards the city centre. 

We went to a Chinese for dinner, where I was determined to eat entirely with chopsticks – I’ve always been awful at it, and so I definitely need to get some practice in before Thailand!! I might starve to death otherwise. 

Back at the Air BnB we watched an incredible Asian version of Take Me Out where the man was grilled mainly on his financial situation and his views on pretty women being mothers – perfect for Halloween night, haha! 

On our second and last day in Brisbane, we got up early to get on a bus to the Australian Zoo, which is owned by Steve Irwin’s family. It was amazing! 

The tour guide in a cork hat gave us tips on the way to the zoo, and we arrived just before 10am. We headed immediately towards the Africa exhibit, as it was the furthest away, and apparently the animals would be more active before the midday heat. To get there, we had to go through other exhibits, such as the massive aviary, and the kuala walkthrough where you could stroke the sleepy animals!

…and one of the kangaroo walkthroughs, where you could feed and stroke them without any supervision from the park workers!

We couldn’t believe you could do this, and we were hesitant to go up to the powerful animals at first, but as long as you didn’t touch their pouches, they were absolutely fine. We bought $2 roo food from one of the shops, and as we were here early, we got lots of attention! 

Walking around, I was getting just as excited at the wild big lizards just casually bathing in the sun throughout the zoo - I'm sure the Ozzies thought I was mad to be looking at them rather than the big animals! We had to constantly watch to make sure we didn't step on any of them.

There were also some gorgeous dingo pups running around, only thirteen weeks old, learning how to obey the trainers so that they could start joining in the ‘experiences’. At this zoo, you can pay extra to have a personal experience with some of the animals, like the tigers, wombats and crocodiles, though there were so many hands-on activities anyway (like the kangaroos) we didn’t bother.

Here's a wombat being taken for a walk!

In Africa there were giraffes, zebras and, James’ favourite, rhinos. 

We also learned next door on Bindi’s Island, where the free-roaming lemurs were, that Bindi was Steve’s child, and her wildlife books and films are very popular in Australia. 

As well as red pandas and snakes, there were lovely Sumatran tigers in the Asian bit, and at 2pm we watched a show, where one of the female tigers stood on its hind legs and climbed a tree all the way to the top for milk!

But back at midday, we made our way towards the middle of the zoo where the main show was to take place – the crocs!

Here we realised how true the statement is that Australia is the USA of Oceania – they put on such a show, with trained birds (including a huge condor) flying around and the main trainer falling into the water and breaking his microphone trying to get away from a huge seawater crocodile. If it was an act, it was a very good one!

He premised the crocodile show by saying that one day many years ago, he had been trying to get debris of the crocodile fence before it fell over during a huge storm, when the croc in the enclosure bit him on the backside and tried to drag him in! Luckily, Steve Irwin was there and wrestled the croc away from the trainer. What a person to have with you in that situation! 

Incidentally, the croc the trainer was demonstrating with the day we went to the zoo was that same crocodile. He baited the crocodile with meat hanging from high above, to show the croc’s ability to launch itself out of the water, and showed that crocodiles only really respond to prey when it’s splashing around in the water, rather than lurking out of reach on land. 

The videos shown on the big screen really showed how brilliant Steve Irwin was – I didn’t realise he used to catch ‘problem’ crocs that used to go up to fishing boats out of curiosity and when hunting for food, for example, and re-situate them so that the humans near them wouldn’t kill them. He was also really crazy, wrestling crocs and getting way too close to dangerous creatures!

Here's James wrestling a crocodile himself - he could give Steve a run for his money!

After the croc show we went to Kangaroo Heaven, which was the bigger enclosure. By now it was a lot more crowded, and so they weren’t quite so bothered by our food!

We then went to the wetlands, where there were more birds, and then through the venomous snakes…

…and we saw emus and condors running around.

Other highlights included crocodiles, alligators, tortoises, Komodo dragons, and one macaw that kept yelling ‘hello!’ whenever we tried to walk away!

We headed back to the coach at 3.45, and got back to Brisbane at 5pm, where we then headed into down for a Dominos and a milkshake (we’re healthy), and watched ‘David Atten-bro’ (oh, you Ozzies). 

Our first week in Australia certainly was interesting; I just wish we had some of that Ozzie sun we’ve heard so much about. Now we’re in Sydney, the weather has got steadily worse, with thunderstorms nearly every day!! Thank God for our raincoats.

The next couple of weeks saw us exploring the North Island a lot more, and taking a bit of down time, as we didn’t have enough money to get to the South Island at all. Saying that, we’ve loved it here in one of the most beautiful places on Earth!

Of course, being a tourist you have to ascend the tallest tower and have a look around, right? So we went up the Sky Tower, which was only a couple of minutes’ walk from our host’s home, and paid an extra $4 to go up twice within 24 hours. So, we went up in the afternoon when the sun was shining and the sky was relatively clear, and again when the sun had set.

We could see for miles around!, and even got a video of someone doing a sky  jump from the top of the tower!

The next day we hired a car so that we could do the one thing we knew we wanted to do in New Zealand - visit Hobbiton!

The Satnav managed to take us to the information centre, not the actual Shire set, and so we had an extra 20 minute drive than we thought - good thing we left Auckland so early! We stopped for breakfast at the Cheese Cafe, and then made our way over.

We got the tour bus with our tour guide, Sonny, up to the set. He kept reminding us of scenes from the films as we went around (we’re such geeks), and we saw loads of Hobbit holes, some full size, and some smaller so that the other characters like Gandalf would look big in comparison. We were also showed Bag End, where Bilbo lives, and Samwise’s house!

There were beautiful rolling hills, and at the end, we got to go to the Green Dragon pub for free cider and ale, hobbit style!

We then drove for an hour and a quarter to Waitomo, where the glow worm caves are located. James said this was one of his favourite places that we’ve been to while travelling, and for good reason. We had a lovely tour guide who had seemed to have been there for fifty years, and she took us through the very dimly lit caves. We saw silk hanging from the ceiling, spun by the glow worms to catch prey, and were told that at Christmas choirs would sing in the massive echoing chamber.

It was just magical, especially when our small group got to go in a little boat and float underneath all of the glow worms on the ceiling. There were so many, and the cave was completely dark, that it looked just like a starry night sky. We couldn’t take any pictures due to ‘tradition’, but we won’t forget it any time soon!

We took advantage of our hire for another day and drove to the black sand peach at Bethells. It was freezing and the waves were massive, but we’d never seen anything like it!

On the way home, we stopped at Fairy Falls. To get down to the falls, we had to trek for 40 minutes each way (the way back up was much harder!) but it was worth it. When we got to the bottom, it was totally secluded, and very beautiful.

We also stopped off at Mount Eden, and parked in the village at its base before realising we could drive up to the summit... which we did. Sheer laziness.

On Saturday, we saw Legend in the cinema, which was brilliant with Tom Hardy playing twins, and got sushi at the food court.

On Sunday we were more active, and got the ferry to Devonport. It only took fifteen minutes, and it was a lovely little place, separated from the bustle of Auckland. We went to their infamous Chocolate Factory and got little posh chocolates, walked along the beaches, bought cheap books from the shops, and climbed up Mountain Victoria.

We also climbed up North Head - one of New Zealand’s old outposts. There were cannons, we watched a film about Devonport from 1840 and the present, and we went through dark tunnels underneath the battlements.

In the evening we saw Pippa and Connor again for drinks, and we visited the Dewali festival taking place in the streets outside of their apartment. We ate Indian food, saw dancers on the main stage, and fireworks at the end. It was so crowded, but really exciting!

The next couple of days saw us moving to another Air BnB on the other side of Auckland, and we went to the fish market to pick up some blue moki. It was delicious, and lasted us four dinners and two lunches!

We also found Auckland’s famous gelato shop, where they don’t let you see the ice cream, but make you taste all of the flavours to decide which one you want to buy. They then dunk it into the topping that their chefs decide compliment their gelato perfectly.

Having missed our opportunity to go to the bird sanctuary down in Waitomo, as it was too late to enter, we felt like we should go and see a real-life kiwi. So, we went to the Auckland zoo!

There were some great exhibits there, and we were really impressed that most of the animals were in open-air enclosures, even the birds, who only had subtle nets to keep them in. We loved the elephants, which we saw being played with at midday by the trainers...

...the giraffes running around together, especially the 8-week old baby...

...the ostriches who, when they ran, lifted up their wings as if running away from something, and the tigers, hippos, rhinos, meerkats, orang-utans, and red pandas.

The cheetahs were also being taken for a walk by their handlers, which was surreal! some of you may have seen the video on Facebook that James uploaded - it was great! 

We were also really happy that we saw a kiwi in its enclosure, running around in the dark, as they are nocturnal and so are rarely seen by humans.

The next day James got a haircut, we got sushi at the Sushi Train, and we had more of that scrummy gelato.

We’d seen advertisements for the Auckland Armageddon a couple of weeks ago, and immediately bought tickets. It’s just like EGX, the gaming convention back at home, and so the geek in us meant we had to go.

We got a lift with our host and his girlfriend, as they went too, which was useful in the pouring rain! Unfortunately, when we got there we had to get into a queue to pick up our tickets as international customers, so we didn’t get in until 10.15am. But we immediately got into the queue for the Playstation VR (Virtual Reality) and got slots to come back at 1pm to try it out.

After a little wander, we got into the line for Star Wars Battlefront, and played a two-player campaign, where we had to defeat six waves of enemies. Only a couple of people had won before us, apparently, and we completed it together! 

We had a bit of lunch, and then went back to the VR station. It was so cool, like actually being inside the game! I was attacked by a shark, and James flew a spaceship.

We went over to the Fallout 4 booth after that, and managed to get a poster and a mask, as they were throwing them out to the crowd! We also played on the new Assassin’s Creed game.

There was an area just for people wanting to learn how to play Magic: The Gathering, a nerdy card game! We decided to get in line, as we play Hearthstone quite a lot (an online card game) and thought we might like it. We ended up getting a half pack for free from the Magic people, then a discounted pack each for $20, and then another free booster pack for coming back and playing a couple of games together. We also went into a few lucky dips - by the end, we had a significant amount of cards! It’ll be useful while travelling, to play on long journeys.

There were some really great costumes about too, unlike us with our half-arsed Goku and Draco “Quidditch Star” Malfoy. 

Yes, this is actually a costume! 

We then went to the main stage where the Auckland Hearthstone final was taking place. Here we watched some good players play against each other; we could even battle others if we wanted to. We didn’t, and went back into the main area, where I bought an Eevee hat!

We got the bus home, and when we got back, I opened up some of my Magic cards. Incredibly, I managed to pull a shiny card that’s worth quite a bit of money, according to the internet, but I didn’t want to get my hopes up until we’d got a second opinion.

(Why is this so sought after?!)

On our last day in New Zealand, we went to a local card shop, so that I could get my rare card priced. As soon as I brought out the card to show the shopkeeper, the Magic enthusiasts in the shop all gasped! It was pretty surreal! And we were told that, even though we were leaving New Zealand the next day, we’d have no problem selling it that day. So we got an offer from a guy playing Magic in the back (massive geeks, but who am I to judge??) and he gave us $250 (about £110) straight away! Woo! I immediately converted it to Australian dollars for the next leg of our journey.

That evening we saw Pippa and Connor again, and played a load of Wii sport games. It was hilarious! But we had to leave early as we had to get up at 3.45am for the plane, eww.

So, now we’re in Australia! It looks like it’ll rain here quite a lot (sigh), but we’ll keep you posted. G’day mates!

Oh heeeeey! We’re in New Zealand for 3 weeks, and with my recent brilliant purchase of a travel keyboard, I thought more regular blog posts means more pictures of this beautiful country! 

We flew with a couple of our friends from Fiji, who were heading to New Zealand and Australia, so that was nice, having som fresh faces to wile away the early hours at the airport with!

One of the first things we bought from STA Travel, before we learnt about AirBnB, was the Auckland arrival package which included two nights at the hostel, the transfer to it, and a ticket to Waiheki Island. So, on the other side, we took the free airport transfer bus to the Nomads Backpacker Hostel in Auckland. We had a couple of drinks at the bar, and here we realised just how much more expensive it is here compared to Fiji - we spent $25 (£10) on two pints! With this in mind, we panicked and ran to the nearest Burger King for a very cheap meal, haha! 

The next day we utilised our free Island ticket, and took the ferry from the Quay (which is only a twenty minute walk from where we’re staying in our AirBnB now!) for about half an hour. 

We also paid extra for a driving tour once we got there, and got a hilarious German guide telling us all about the North and South parts of the island, and how much the various holiday homes cost. In comparison to England, it’s really not that bad!

We also saw a variety and some beautiful beaches - although it was a shock going from the heat of the USA and Fiji to 15 degrees. I may be wearing my thermals!!

We asked to be dropped in the main town on the way back to the harbour, and we stopped for what I genuinely thought was the best Pad Thai I’ve ever had. 

We then decided to go on one of the self-guided walking tours around the island, which I’m still in two minds about ;) it was absolutely beautiful, but half way around we realised the tide had come in, and so we had to scale a few mountains to get back to the harbour! We also accidentally went via the ‘advanced trampers only’ route...

My legs killed after our three hour tramp!! 

Along the route were a few old World War Two bunkers too - it was really eerie imagining the soldiers that used to live there when they had to, and I can’t quite believe the war reached all the way to NZ. 

Eventually we got back to the ferry, and pretty much collapsed for the rest of the day. 

Before we checked out of the hostel the next morning, we made sure to vandalise our bed (as you do):

Before we checked into our AirBnB, we wandered around Queen Street (the main street in the city) and took in the sights. We were so happy with our room when we got there - it’s massive, has a TV and bathroom, and its own fridge and toaster and kettle! It’s definitely one of our favourite AirBnBs so far. In fact, due to the expensive drinks in Auckland, the fridge has been so useful, allowing us to store various bottles of liquor. As George has said, we’re basically drinking our way around the world!

Here’s the grand Auckland Museum, also known as the Imperial War Museum of Auckland. Unlike most of the museums we’ve visited around the world, the main emphasis was national, so we learnt about the animals, history, and Maori (indigenous people) of New Zealand. 

There was also a floor dedicated to memoirs from World War Two...

...and even a room with a Minecraft-made version of Gallipoli, a big battle in NZ in WW2, with oculus to allow you to play the game as if you’re actually in it. 

James had recently learnt that Pippa, his friend from uni, was in Auckland with her boyfriend Connor, and so we met up with them on Queen Street the next morning. They took us to the French Market that only runs on Sundays, which was amazing! We bought loads of scrumpsious food, including a chocolate and hazelnut cronut (a doughnut made with croissant dough!) and Munster cheese, which is really stinking out our fridge even now. 

We then went across down to look around the fish market, after stopping for pitchers of Pimms and Tiger beer, and that evening, we went to their apartment they are sharing with another couple for wine.

The Aquarium was really great - it may have only taken an hour and a half to go around it, but it’s a specialised one, full of creatures indigenous to New Zealand. Plus, we got a free shuttle in the shark bus!

In the afternoon we went to the Art Museum, again mainly full of Kiwi art. Though we did have a bit of a laugh at the modern art (again... not ashamed) and the ‘film art’ that made no sense. 

The restaurant I was desperate to try is called the Crab Shack, a lovely seafood restaurant in the harbour. I may have looked slightly special with the giant bib they gave me for my crab.

Well, that’s all for now! We’re planning on going on some brilliant excursions outside of Auckland this week, to see some more of the beauty of New Zealand. And we’ll leave you with me, as beautiful as a piece of art. 

Hi everyone! It’s been a while since I’ve popped up a post, but that’s mainly due to the abysmal wifi in Fiji - though we can’t complain too much, as we weren’t sure whether we were going to get any at all! So we’ve just arrived in New Zealand, safe and sound, and now it’s time to finally update you all on what we’ve been up to.

The reason this post is starting on the 25th is due to two things: the fact that our flight was at night, and the 19 hour time difference when we crossed the International Date Line: we left Los Angeles at 11.30pm on the 23rd, and arrived in Nadi, Fiji, on the 25th at 5am! Needless to say, we were knackered, especially as it was 10am in Los Angeles at that point. 

The hostel which we booked through AirBnB had cancelled on us due to reservations, so we booked a private room in Bluewater Lodge, a lovely hostel within a group of hostels under Bamboo Lodge. We couldn’t check in until 10am, however, so we wandered down the beach. And my God, it was beautiful. 

It was weird how much like volcanic Iceland it was, in terms of natural beauty, but had so much more greenery and life when you just turned a corner after the beach. James said it was like stepping into a scene from Jurassic Park!

James was burnt immediately... and this burn was particularly funny when he fell asleep with his head in his arms!!

We got breakfast in the lodge cafe while waiting for our room, and here we discovered how cheap Fiji is. It’s $10 per £3, and most dinners were $15, so we were eating a load of food for not much! The drinks were also incredible at $6 for a banana rum and pineapple! I think we actually managed to nearly half our budget for this fortnight. 

We quickly became friends with Jerry, the hostel entertainment/handyman, and he convinced us to get over our jetlag and go on a day excursion with him. For $80 we got lunch, snorkel hire, and return transfers - and it was great! We went to Natadola Bay, which is known as one of the top ten beaches in the entire world. Here we met Rob and Jenny, two Brits who are travelling on their own respectfully. This trip actually started a friendship - we have them both on Facebook now, and I’m sure we’ll see them later on in our trip, as they’re going to similar countries as us!

We were immediately in the sea when we got there, jumping the waves and waiting for the Fijians who were accompanying us to cook us food. And we weren’t disappointed, even if the Australians who had come with us were apprehensive - they had cooked us fresh toffee and coconut as a snap, then bread fruit (which was an amazing savoury fruit I’ve never even heard of!) and then chicken and rice! They had made a fire and were cooking the food over the flames, so all of the meal tasted incredibly smokey. Afterwards, we handpicked our own crabs off of the beach and set them off along a makeshift racecourse that Jerry had carved out of the sand - are you surprised that James won? Yelling at the tiny crabs was really funny though, despite the crabs trying to pinch us to release them, and I actually came third! 

Then we went off to the other side of the beach to snorkel, where there was an incredible amount of coral, but as James and I have never snorkelled properly before (and James was struggling to see without his glasses!) we couldn’t enjoy it as much as we would have done, as we were still trying to learn how to breathe properly and keep water out of our masks.

(By the way - we both didn’t want to take our phones to the beach, so I’m currently waiting for Jenny to send me the pictures she took. Hopefully there will be some great photos of the winning crab!)

After getting back to the hostels in a bouncy bus, cold and wet, we were planning to go down for drinks and to socialise, but we ended up falling asleep at 7pm! We woke up dozily at 11.15pm and staggered down to the bar, but the jetlag must have hit us hard! 

Some bits of our hostel: 

Here’s our hostel restaurant (with Rob on the right hand side!):

Some things we noticed on our first day: how lovely and smokey the island smells; how happy the native Fijians are, singing songs all the time and exclaiming Bula (Hello) at us (there were even Fijians greeting us with ukuleles at the airport!); and that, in the hostels, Brits are just about everywhere. If we were starting to miss home, it was immediately remedied by the shouts of “wheyyyy!” when a waitress dropped her plates. 

The next day we met some other great people and decided to go into Nadi town centre on the local bus, as it was raining. We got lured into the native market and immediately regretted it. They said they wanted to perform the ‘traditional welcome ceremony’ on us, and at that point, we had no idea what the dirty dish water in a massive wooden bowl was. We genuinely thought we were going to be drugged!! But, as we found out later in our hostel, it was the local very weak narcotic called kava, which only really makes your tongue go all tingly. Still, we bought some bracelets and rushed out of there as fast as we could, and went back to the comfort of our hostel! 

Yummy fooooood.

This all cost us $43.50 (£13) by the way, including the drinks!

For the next couple of days we got into a routine of relaxing and drinking with our new friends, which suited us very well, particularly as it was raining. 

On Monday the 28th we went to Port Denarau for our transfer to Manta Ray Island, located north of Fiji in the Yasawa Islands. We took the Yasawa Flyer over to the island (thank God it was relatively calm - I didn’t want a repeat of whale watching in Iceland!) and the view was spectacular. 

Here we were paying for a compulsory meal plan of $87 a day - a more expensive way to eat, but as the islands are obviously cut off from anywhere else, they have a monopoly on the amenities. Saying that, we got an all-you-can-eat breakfast, a big lunch, and a four course dinner every day! The showers had only cold water, though, and to go to the toilet at night I’d have to go on a mini adventure outside, half asleep, hoping not to fall in the sand! 

While I sunbathed in our first bit of sun the whole time we’d been in Fiji, James went for a snorkel in the coral just outside our Treehouse Bure. And when I eventually experienced it the next day, wow, the fish are beautiful and colourful. It’s a shame I couldn’t get any photos, but James has loads of footage on his GoPro video camera, so we’ll have to post them on Facebook when we get back!

Our little Treehouse Bure:

...and some photos around the tiny island - so tiny, in fact, it would only take you about half an hour to walk around it. 

The next day we met two New Zealanders, Dave and Catherine, and from here on out started to have most meals with them. They really were lovely, just in Fiji for a little holiday on the school holidays, as Catherine is an English teacher - we had loads to talk about! Most nights we’d come down for happy hour as well and sample the lovely cocktails. They were more expensive here than in Bamboo, but still lovely. 

Dave and I with the horrible rice pudding that wasn’t rice pudding...

In the evening we decided to go along to the dancing show, where the Fijian workers on the island put on a performance for us. It was quite fun actually, ending with us participating in a very enthusiastic conga line! 

The next day, we responded to the call of the drums. They rang at 7am, and were the sole reason we chose this island: the drums meant that they had spotted manta rays, and that they were going to take out the few that rushed over to the water’s edge to snorkel with them. It was just incredible. The manta rays can grow up to 23 feet, apparently, though I’m sure the ones we saw weren’t quite that big - though probably still about 18 feet long! We got in a speedboat at the top end of the very fast current, jumped in with our gear and drifted along so that the manta rays would pass underneath us while they were feeding. A massive one came towards me at one point with its massive mouth gaping open, and I admit I panicked!! Sadly, we couldn’t get any photos either, but hopefully James has some incredible videos on his GoPro! 

The next few days was filled with more snorkelling in the beautiful coral, more drinking, and more hanging out with Catherine and David. On the 4th, however, it was time to leave the island. 

Fun fact: today was the day we discovered that James’ coral bracelet that we bought from the native market was home to some kind of green growth. Ew. At least it’s definitely real coral!

The boat ride was so choppy that it was a miracle I didn’t feel too sick (though I did keep my eyes closed the whole three hours). There was a beautiful sunset though, and a Chinese family who had, bizarrely, brought with them their Tupperware box of rice and kettle.

We got back to the mainland to discover that Jetset Accommodation were still under renovations, but hadn’t bothered to contact us to let us know - in fact, that whole building looked deserted! We weren’t too upset though, as we got our money back and we were actually very pleased to go back to Bamboo. And for the first time in Fiji, we got our own private toilet and shower!

After dinner and drinks, we joined the kava circle lead by the natives, which James had actually been a part of quite a few times at Bamboo because he loved playing guitar with them. It is a really lovely experience, listening to music played by them and drinking kava with them and clapping - though, quite often, I’d just let James do his thing, as they absolutely loved him and his guitar! 

There’s a brilliant video of James jamming with a really cool Fijian who liked to play the Blues - I’m sure I’ll put that on facebook at some point. 

The next few days we chilled out with our friends - it’s a country where you can’t really do much, but you don’t really mind at all! In fact, after traipsing around America, we were very happy to just relax. 

Puppy, along with cool Blues guy (right)!! And Mary with him too: 

James and I really loved Fiji. The people are fun and always up for a laugh, and the atmosphere is so relaxed - their mantra is “Fiji Time”, which essentially means, don’t stress out, and don’t rush! We’d love to come back at some point, and honestly, it’s probably our favourite country we’ve visited so far. 

Time to go experience New Zealand! I’m sure it’ll be just as beautiful as Fiji is.