Life Goes On...

it's crucial that you untie "special interest" from "expertise". "it's true just trust me bro" doesn't have any extra weight when you add "I know because it's my special interest". you are not immune from falling for misinformation, and you are not immune from sharing misinformation. not to mention the fact that "amount of knowledge" isn't even a requirement for something being classified as a special interest lol!

(person who learned from childhood to make themself as small and unimportant as possible to avoid being a burden) yeah its okay we dont have to do my thing if you dont want i dont mind

You’ve grown into someone who would have protected you as a child. And that is the most powerful move you made.

death is so beautiful. to lie in the soft brown earth, with grass in your hair, listening to only the stillness of the world. to have no yesterday to mourn and no tomorrow to dread. to forget time, to forget life, to be at peace.

I find it very offensive that the more unwell you are, the more things you have to do to maintain your health. Things like following special diets, going to medical appointments, making big and important decisions about what treatments to use. At the same time, the more unwell you are the less energy you have to do all of these extra things. It seems grossly unfair.

On top of all that: Depression ! You just feel empty, drained and everything. But you can't simply rot in bed, because your body demands treatment or help, which you mentally can't provide, but you must. This constant state of dysfunction is the cherry on top, because you literally don't have time to be depressed. I I miss one day of medication, hell breaks loose for several weeks. It's a full time job and no one sees it or cares. Then people ask why you are angry, sad or everything at once. "But others have it worse than you do." I know, but this is also not the life I envisioned, so please excuse me for mourning a life I never could have had.

To be loved without performing is impossible.

I just love tumblr I feel so much better knowing that I’m not the only one on the edge of dying and suiciding

every year i reach new lows and wish i killed myself earlier

Best thing you can do is have a routine; take care of yourself.

there are doors into your life, and there are doors out of your life. people will ultimately leave, but that doesn’t mean that the door into your life is locked. remember that people grow and change and often times need to leave the room and never walk back in. you cannot force them to stay, and neither door can ever be locked. this is for the best

a previous version of yourself would thank you a million times over for getting you to your current self