Lardybum

It's not something you're supposed to drink yet you can't help yourself.

But not because you like the taste...

No, a pint of heavy cream means something different to you.

Every time you drink it, you know as it fills your stomach that there's no turning back.

You're going to wake up fatter tomorrow and all it took was one drink.

Because the truth is heavy cream is not just a drink...

It's a fat potion.

And simply realizing that you're drinking fat potion just makes you want to drink it faster.

And it makes it addictive, knowing you can so easily drink yourself fat.

So you do it.

You start drinking heavy cream every day, slowly pushing your limits with how much you can hold.

The speed at which you gain always surprises you.

Blowing past 20lbs a month like it's nothing.

In almost no time at all you've gone from being average to very chubby.

Nobody says anything but you know they notice it.

How could they not?

You have a belly now, your face is fat and you're chubby all over.

But the pace of your gains never seems to falter.

And you know that you're just a few months away from becoming the morbidly obese person you've always wanted to be.

Heavy cream will transform you.

I’ve been asked a few times how I managed to get so fat and although I’m not the fattest guy out there, I’m pretty fucking fat… So in case it helps…

Portions

I’m very much a fan of eating tons of McDonalds and feeling incredible massive after and of course you’re gonna gain weight but… the key to consistent weight gain and/ or maintaining your weight is finishing everything on your plate. Don’t leave a thing. Eventually you’ll start to crave more and your portion sizes will increase.

Snacking

Always have some snacks laying about. Doesn’t have to be huge just the odd chocolate bar/ crisps, whatever. And like the portion sizes the more the snack the more you’ll crave and the more your appetite will increase. 

Exercise

Preferably… Don’t. Take the elevator whenever you can and do as little as possible. If you’re one of those healthy fat boys or muscle/ fat gainers who likes the gym always make sure you’re having extra calories to support your workout. 

Upgrading your Kitchen

Again I love anything unhealthy but changing small details in your diet will help with weight gain. Make sure your milk is the highest percentage of fat, use real butter and not margarine. And some ‘healthy’ stuff can be incredibly fattening too. Try nutty granola for breakfast (that stuff is calorific); drink tons of fruit juice. You can actually be a healthy gainer pretty easily…  Or/ and just add a multipack of donuts to your daily routine.

And Your Wardrobe…

Obviously keep your old clothes to try on; to see how much fatter you’ve grown but when I wear clothes that are loose fitting I have a tendency to put on more weight than usual. Whether this is because subconsciously I realise I’m gaining weight and my body slows down or not… Consider buying the next size up or more adjustable clothes. Buy jeans with an elastic waist or a more stretchy kinda of jacket (weather depending); it’s not a bad investment either because you’ll soon fill them out…

The FEEDISM MAP

As requested, with the descriptions from issue #01 of HORNGRY.

There’s a place for everyone and it’s an amazing spectrum. We all have different aspects we gravitate towards and other we don’t. Don’t expect just because you’re into humiliation, that everyone else will be. Or that because weight measurements do it for you, everyone else feels the same way. Respect all combinations of these aspects and take your time to find out what your chat partner is into. ♡

FEEDING - for all you, who love to be fed by a feeder. Whether it’s a second dessert as hot foreplay in bed, or an entire meal. It’s a pretty common aspect that has different ways of how it is used:

SOFT FEEDING - for all of you who love to be spoiled, who love to have sweet encouraging words being whispered into your ear with every bite you take.

HARD FEEDING - for all of you who love it rough. When you’re so full you can’t eat another bite… or can you? Let’s test your limits, let’s see how you do when you truly lose control…

FOODISM - for all the foodies out there that love quality just as much as quantity. Restaurants or home cooked haute cuisine are your favorite weapon of choice. After all, taste buds are just another sex organ…

COOKING - for all of you who love to cook, or have someone cook for you! The sizzling of a frying pan, the smell of hot lasagne right out of the oven, followed by a fresh batch of cupcakes…

STUFFING - for all of you who love the feeling of a belly being filled up by the sheer amounts of food you can fit into it. The more, the better! The tightness, the pressure, after all, stuffing is more than just a means to an end.

BLOATING - for all of you who love the feeling of a delicious liquid streaming down your throat, stretching your belly to new limits. Whether it’s just a temporary expansion or part of your daily bellybuilding routine. 

TIGHT CLOTHES - for all of you who love the straining of buttons, the feeling of a belt digging into your lovehandles and your shirt riding up with each move, revealing your beautiful size to everyone around…

BUTTON POPPING - for all of you who consider the sound of a surrendering button a most exciting surprise. The near orgasmic pop when a sturdy jeans button bids goodbye or the next shirt is destroyed by your girth.

MEASURING - for all of you who consider a scale and a measuring tape just another sex toy. How exciting it is to see the numbers climb with every bite of food you take. 

WORSHIPPING - for all of you that know the belly is something that deserves to be worshiped and respected. You want to see the pride in your feeders eyes, hear them mutter words of adoration…

BELLY PLAY - for all of you who can’t keep your hands away from your belly. You love the feeling of how it jiggles when you lift it up, the warmth of your admirers hands on your soft fat and the soothing pressure of a belly massage.

BEARS - for all of you who identify as big, furry bears. Whether you’re gay, bi or straight, the beard’s all yours and compliments the belly just as much as your thick chest rug.

LIFTING - for all of you who enjoy muscle growth just as much as belly growth. After all, a bit gut is impressive already… but combine that with big beefy arms and you have yourself an amazing beefy built that will certainly turn heads.

BONDAGE - for all of you who love to be tied up. Goes best with a nice feeding. Whether it’s ropes, or hand cuffs… or maybe a blind fold? 

ROLE PLAY - for all of you who love to creative. Whether you like to imagine yourself way bigger than you are (for now!), or go in a completely different direction. The possibilities are literally endless…

INSTANT GAINING - for all of you impatient folks who love the idea of gaining all the weight in just a matter of minutes. Whether it’s magical or scientific. Just lay back and imagine yourself grow…

PADDING - for all you who love the feeling of a soft pillow under your clothes to imitate a bigger size. The softness, that feels like fat and the feeling of walking around in a new and bigger size… do you dare going out like that?

HUMILIATION - for all of you who love the naughty teasing, or even the harsher, adrenaline rush inducing insult from your feeder. The exciting mixture of shame and pleasure when they call you out on how fat you’ve gotten…

FUNNEL FEEDING - for all of you who just can’t get enough! A mash up of bloating and force feeding… The especially greedy ones can even do it by themselves.

MEGALOMANIA - for all of you know that size does matter… Whether it’s tallness, big beefy muscles or a big fat belly. You just can’t get big enough, strong enough, fat enough…

CRUSHING - for all of you who love to see what your impressive weight is capable of.

CRUSHING OBJECTS - for all of you that love to break everything in sight with your size! The sound of a bed squeaking under your weight, a chair breaking because it just can’t handle your growing body…

CRUSHING PEOPLE - for all of you that literally take our breath away! You love to make your feeder feel what all that added weight really feels like. You make them squirm with pleasure, especially if you’re getting too big to handle…

MACROPHILIA - for all you guys that love the idea of being bigger than humanly possible. Why just be big, when you can imagine crushing a whole city with your size?

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I've been making these brownies for a solid year now, and they always turn out amazing. I pretty much know the recipe by heart.

Disclaimer: I'm from the UK, so the measurements will be in grams, sorry. I've tried to convert them but please let me know if they're incorrect.

Ingredients

125g (half a cup) softened butter (not melted, just squishy enough that you can mix it up easy) I prefer to use salted butter for an extra flavour boost.

225g (1 cup) sugar (brown sugar is best, but honestly any works.)

3 eggs (free range!! Protect the chickens!!)

200g (7 ounces) dark chocolate bar

100g (3.5 ounces) white chocolate bar

100g (3.5 ounces) milk chocolate bar

175g (1 1/3 cups) PLAIN flour. It has to be plain, not self rising.

OPTIONAL: flavourings. I like to use vanilla and orange extracts. These just make the flavour a little more complex. Add as much as you see fit, but keep it within a dessert spoonful.

OPTIONAL: other fillings. Ya like m&ms? Throw a bunch of those into the mix too! Go crazy aaaaaa go stupid aaaaaaaaaa

Equipment

I use a stand mixer but you can mix this recipe by hand, i promise you. You can pretty easily make it in one bowl.

Something to melt chocolate in, either a microwave + microwaveable bowl or a glass bowl and a saucepan of hot water.

A knife for chopping chocolate and maybe other toppings

I don't know the measurements of the pan i use to cook it in, but a standard square-shaped pan should be fine. For reference this recipe makes 16 brownies about the size of what you see in the gif above.

Hopefully, an oven. You can probably use an air fryer but make sure to adjust the cooking time and temperature accordingly.

Method

Preheat the oven to 160°c/140°c for a fan oven

Mix the sugar and butter thoroughly. The mixture should be dense but light.

Add in any flavourings you want like vanilla or orange.

Mix in the eggs 1 at a time, very thoroughly.

Melt the dark chocolate. I melt mine in the microwave but that can be risky. If you decide to use the microwave, do it in 30 second intervals and mix each time until liquid. The other way you can melt it is in a glass bowl over a pot of boiling water. This is more tedious but much safer.

Stir the dark chocolate into the mixture thoroughly.

Add the flour and mix in very carefully and slowly. I mean, stop the moment you don't see any more white specks. You really dont wanna overmix this or it'll ruin the texture.

Get the white and milk chocolate bars, and chop them into strips. Don't break the bars into squares. It's kind of hard for me to describe it, but just chop the bars along the width, about a centremeter between each slice. They should look like little sticks of chocolate.

Pour HALF of the brownie batter into the baking tray

Lay all your toppings out in the tray, making sure it's all spread out evenly. The reason we cut the chocolate the way we did is because it gets super melty and almost like the brownie is stuffed with chocolate filling, instead of having chocolate chips dotted around.

Cover with the rest of the brownie batter.

Put in the oven for exactly 20 minutes.

Take out of the oven, leave to cool (either completely or until just warm) and enjoy!!