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anyway i need to finish editing scene three

its not even that bad but its still embarassing

ive managed to skirt around what i make on that side of things bc my mother lowkey dgaf but this is unfortunately different and my ego has damned me

fuck my gay life

#my mother and stepdad called and at one point my game was brought up #and she offhanded mentioned they would play it when it was done. which is fine like its a vn probably the most accessible to get into #but its also about some stupid gay shit bruhhhh

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finally reading chlorine and hm its not the worst but i do not like the writing

#i want to be nicer bc i want to like it but we shall see

did no work and i really got get back to it i canttttt slip at the last minute i was doing so well

#okay im getting up now no more music

wirovin

yesterday sucked so bad so now im cleaning up to hopefully feel better when i go back to working. admitted my defeat and shoved all the boxes back into the spare room ill go through them another time for now i just need clean space

#dont think im going to tidy the kitchen bc i do not care right now i just want my room nice #which is eighty percent done at this point tbh

i am also acquiring a cat

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wtf my stepdad just offered a car like yesss wth

just remembered at my old job we had a price matching policy and there was like this one family who came in and did that for literally every item the daughtwr shovinf the phone in my face literally just go there then why tf are in here

#on one hand i get the grind on the other hand deeply irritating behavior #probably just cause they were rude whenever they came in in general but whatevwr

hatie

anyway went out and everything but now i got work to do ... i cannot take a break until this game is DONE !!!! next scene to be edited ...

but anyway the only problem is a bit of overscaling but tbh it does not bother me much + ill just play the games windowed anyway. and it took forever to get the headphones to work but thats bc we didnt realize the jack was literally on the side smh

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okay i went out and had fun at the the thrift and got a small old tv to use as a game moniter bc i thought would be fun + most of my games are older / meant for older moniters ANYWAY i thought i was gonna be able to hook it up to the pc my brother left behind bc his moniter was fucked but apparently the pc also doesnt even work so thats great. idek what he even did to it because it was just fine before he left. maybe it was fueled by his evil energy and my pure heart isnt enough to work </3

kayla-denker

Hey, you, cis girl that's very (correctly) vocal about women being allowed to talk about their periods, do you include trans women in that?

I ask because every single time I've tried to talk about it to anyone that isn't a trans woman they get fucking angry. Which has caused me to have to just suffer in silence every single month. So I really relate to cis women when they talk about literally the exact same thing; being shamed by everyone around them their whole lives for talking about their periods, so they just suffer in silence every month as it negatively impacts their work and social lives. But I don't even feel like I can voice that I am literally dealing with the same exact thing because most of y'all react like you want to throw me in front of a bus for saying it, even those of you who act like your such big great transfem allies.

kayla-denker

I guess I'll take this opportunity to talk about trans women periods. The first thing any tme person thinks when they hear this is always "how can trans women have periods? They don't have uteruses!"

The answer is: the uterus isn't what causes your period, it is effected by your period. What causes your period and what causes trans women's periods is the same thing: the endocrine system.

HRT changes the sex of your endocrine system. Feminizing HRT makes it a female endocrine system, giving us a 28-day hormone cycle just like cis women. At the end of that cycle, the hypothalamus floods the body with prostaglandins. Those are what cause all but one of the period symptoms, because they make muscles inflame and contract. They are what make the uterus shed its lining, they are what cause intestinal cramps, they are what cause body aches, they are what cause headaches and migraines. The only period symptom not causes by the release of prostaglandins throughout the body is depression, and that is caused by your endocrine system simply not processing as much estrogen and from simply feeling like shit.

So, the only symptoms trans women don't get every 28 days is menstrual cramps, because yes we do not menstruate since we don't have uteruses. But migraines, depression, body aches, intestinal cramps, and the infamous "period shits" don't exactly add up to us having any better of a time. Except we have to pretend that we're fine and nothing is different because no one believes that we get periods, not even cis women.

"But you can't call it a period then because that refers to MENSTRUATION!" is another one I hear all the time. This is incorrect. You use the word "period" instead of just "menstruation" because it doesn't just refer to menstruation. It refers to a period at the end of the hormone cycle where we experience a host of symptoms. And not all cis women experience all of the symptoms that encompass the period. Not all cis women get migraines, or body aches, or have severe depression. If a cis woman gets a hysterectomy she doesn't menstruate either! In that instance she experiences an identical period to what trans women experience. Yet, I doubt you'd insist that cis women who've had hysterectomies don't have periods.

kayla-denker

Oh, another thing that I personally discovered after bottom surgery: vaginal odor changes for trans women during our periods too. I was not expecting that because I always thought it was just from menstruation. But nope, the ph levels of a trans woman's vagina are the same of as a cis woman's vagina, and it changes during our periods just the same.

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