darkness eternal

Seriously Tumblr they're just fucking nipples they're not sexual stop being such fucking circlejerks, enjoy your user base dropping by 50% because I've been on Tumblr for 6 years and I'm definitely not staying now with sexist shit like this

the other night i tried to make a curry and i got chilli burns all over my face, so i thought to myself ‘hang on, doesn’t milk soothe chilli burns? it does’ and i couldn’t google because i couldn’t see so i just had to blindly feel my way to the fridge and pour out a bowl of milk, and then plant my face in the bowl of milk, anyway at that point the rice cooker went off and triggered a power surge which turned my electricity off, which i didn’t notice at first because i had my face in a bowl of milk and when i did emerge from the dairy prison i thought i had gone blind with chilli burns. so no i don’t really cook much.

Me, in tears: whatever tho I guess it doesn’t matter haha

When YouTube recommends you something from a hyperfixation that ended 3 months ago.. Like oh no honey I’m watching this thing now catch up old man