TW ED SHIT you deserve recovery

anorexia? more like anorizzia

when i’m back in my mandarin orange phase 🫶🫶

dawg i kept blacking out during my variation and basically collapsing cuz i hadn’t eaten and i had 4 hours of straight rehearsal, and my teacher just went “it’s cause you weren’t spotting 🧐” like miss ma’am 😐

flashback to that one dream i had freshman year where i stepped on a scale and weighed 100 pounds, and then woke up lowkey horrified bc i thought it was so high and was glad i didn’t weigh that much 😐 wish i had that problem now

once my braces come off i’m shoving a shotgun down my throat

y’all ever binge and purge 3. times within the same night..yeah me too

just got invited to yagp by my dance teacher. starving myself until then

the debate between not eating before a ballet audition to look skinny in my leo or eating so i have energy to dance well

anybody else gotta stop themselves from constantly apologizing to their friends for things that you think are really big problems but apparently no one else fucking noticed them or like asking your best friends boyfriend if she hates you and then apologizing for asking him because you’re so paranoid and just unwell. yeah.

i hate knowing that if i tried to kms again that nobody would even find me in time to save me bc nobody gives a shit and i’m not gonna put people through the trauma of calling them or texting them n shit

my obsessional shit has been getting bad recently because i’ve been obsessed with being clean recently so i’ll like wash my hands with cleaning supplies because i don’t feel like the soap is clean enough and i just feel so dirty and anxious all the time and i literally hate it

bro lowkey hyped bc today a girl on my team was lifting me for a stunt but i’m normally a backspot so like , anyway then like afterwards she went “you’re like really light for how tall you are” and like WOOO