thought i’d share SOME of the points:

• maintenance sex

• patriarchal sex and lack of orgasm

• constantly shaving their body hair

• disproportionate domestic/emotional/mental labour while claiming the relationship is “50/50”

• subsidising his lifestyle (i.e. splitting the groceries when he’s the one who eats way more, being the only reason his apartment is clean and there’s not pubes on the bathroom floor)

• dealing with his porn addiction (where he’s watching teens and rape and misogynistic acts)

• dealing with his secret porn addiction while he claims he doesn’t watch it

• high chance of him being a pedo, misogynist, abuser, narcissistic, manipulative, etc.

• male ego and general lack of personality and accountability

• constantly having your nervous system dysregulated

• lack of meaningful care and conversation in general, especially in comparison to an average female friendship

• women having to use intrusive birth control methods because the male would rather risk her health than wrap it up

• him bonding with other men over misogyny and not having pro-social behaviours where he pro-actively stands up for women, minorities, etc.

• having to accept him checking out other women in real life, on social media, etc. and being micro-cheated on constantly, while being told it’s not cheating and that you’re insecure and crazy and a controlling bitch actually

• spending hours and hundreds on beauty maintenance while he… looks like that

• being rushed while getting ready

• never being allowed to be ugly in her own space

• total loss of bodily autonomy (i.e. being groped while doing the dishes)

• doing his laundry and cooking for him

• sharing a bed with a man (especially one who snores and is unhygienic)

• skid marks and piss and hair left in YOUR bathroom

• dealing with someone else’s trauma, from a sex that is averse to therapy and developing emotional intelligence

• a male shit-talking their past female exes (what did he do to her?)

• most males being okay with casually lying to their partner

• most males only being as loyal as their options and cheating on her if another woman ever expressed interest in him

• playing the role of a mother and a wife to a manchild

• no empathy or meaningful additional support while on your period

• having to tip toe around mantrums

• constant yeast infections and UTIs

• constantly being belittled, gaslighted, psychologically micro-abused on a daily basis

• male insecurity and jealousy, especially if you’re accomplished and attractive

• manage all the logistics and mental load (grocery lists, doctors appointments, “oh, we should go on a date” and subsequently planning the date)

• having to overlook their problematic opinions on most things

• general lack of empathy

• most men aren’t cut out to be romantic partners or platonic friends so how could they possibly be cut out for fatherhood

• having to take interest in his hobbies (sport, video games, anime) while he don’t give a flying fuck about yours

• dealing with male body hair and fat men

• man sweat, armpit hair, asshole hair, balding

• constant objectification

• constantly being reminded that no matter how progressive he is, he is fundamentally a man

• heterosexual relationships being rooted entirely in chance (i.e. of him not being a pedo, misogynistic, abuser)

what strikes me is the fact that you could have the most “feminist” man on the planet yet most of the above still apply lmao

@lusi-1 right, so just to name a few things, i’m sure you’d bet your life on the fact that your hubby has never and will never watch porn while he’s in a relationship with you (100% of men fail right there), pays more for groceries since he presumably eats more, has a vasectomy so the burden of birth control isn’t on you, he does his own laundry and cooking 100% of the time, doesn’t snore in bed and isn’t unhygienic, you’ve somehow witnessed him time and time again stand up for women in front of men when you’re not there, he reads feminist literature…

tbh i can’t be bothered to continue this list because there’s simply no man on earth which passes all of the above, and het-partnered women are notorious for cope. i’ve been in relationships with males before where everything was abysmal yet i’d still feel the need to defend him, so i know how this game goes

if anything, a much more level-headed and believable approach to partnerships with men would be “yeah, he treats me well enough, even though i do disproportionately do the labour and sometimes he touches me when i’m doing the dishes, i hate how he snores, and i fully admit there’s a chance he watches porn/CSAM/rape behind my back”

anything else is just delusional, i’m sorry

—

actually, i’m sorry, but i took the liberty to stalk your tumblr for about 5 minutes.

it seems you and your hubby met online, are in a long distance relationship, haven’t meaningfully lived together beyond brief vacations, are asking for financial assistance from strangers so he can marry you (aka use you to move to the west), so how you can confidently comment on many on the points above when you’re not even in a cohabiting relationship is beyond me

it also seems like you and him frequently communicate via your reblogs anyway, which kinda proves my point about het-partnered women are not to be trusted anyway

Old conservative ladies know that men are violent rapists, so they promote finding The Good One and being an obedient wife so you don't trigger a violent outburst and stay protected from other violent men.

Libfems know that and they propagate legal prostitution so that men rape only one cast of women, and not all women. Besides, if you just say yes to all sex, you are unrapeable amirite.

Trans "men" know that and they choose to pretend to be men and blend in so that they are not targets of their violence.

Mothers know that and they dont let their teenage daughters go to shady parties. Fathers know that and they teach their teenage daughters that boys only want one thing.

Pickmes know it and they hope that they can doormat their way into men's loyalty and draw their attention to le ugly feminists instead.

Normie het women know it and they message the guy's license plate to their friend chat and invent elaborate ways to signal SOS when they go out on a date.

Boymoms know it as they are often the ones to cover their sons' horrifying crimes, obviously.

You are directly harming your own cause.

Refusing to acknowledge the existence of the State of Israel doesn’t materially change the reality that Israel is a sovereign nation with over ten million citizens. When leftists in the west chant “from the river to the sea” and “we don’t want no two states”, regardless of the intention, what do you think Israelis hear? What do you think a people that has faced genocide in living memory, from which our population still has not recovered, gets from that? We don’t hear it and consider your points, we hear it and remember all of the times Israel has been attacked with genocidal intent, and only survived through our own defense.

And what does this ultimately result it? It results in Israelis who no longer believe in the peace process. It results in Israelis who feel a visceral sense of fear which leads to doubling down on national security. It leads to diaspora Jews feeling unsafe in their communities and immigrating to Israel.

If someone were, as a random example, say hospitalized for over two weeks with no explanation, I think that should automatically trigger a special election to replace them.

If you're still able to do your job, then prove it. And if you're not, then you're actively obstructing democracy by not stepping down.

Which is to say, that if a public official were to pass away or into a coma, and their handlers choose to obfuscate that fact, this should be seen as intentionally obstructing democracy.

It's like wanting to have our cake and eat it too, which is somewhat possible when it comes to fiction, but systems of oppression like patriarchy don't care why you like male violence, or in what form you accept it, as long as you like and accept male violence. As long as women continue to feel desirable using patriarchal dynamics, in any and every form, the system lives on.