Just a humble writer

Sun was already behind trees and illuminated world in beautiful warm gold colour. Nilah saw Miho playing near forest and she thought about her conversation with Bon Hwa.

“Miho is outside. I will go talk with him.” She called inside to let Yeong shin know. She gets used to let him know where she is, or where she is going since he can’t see her. But she noticed he was getting better in paying attention to noises she made and he knows where she is before she speaks. Like his hearing skills were stronger than before.

“I will be good” came response, and rustle of clothes.

Nilah made her way outside and smile, when young boy noticed her presence. He was different. His eyes were sad and scared.

“Hey Miho. How are you? It’s been a while since I saw you.”

He just shrugged and play with stick like it was a sword.

“You have nice pendant.” She points on fang hanging around his neck.

“Yeong shin gave it to me. I should return it to him.” He mumbled and stopped chopping tall grass.

“And why is that?”  she sat to the grass and patted the ground next to her. Miho sat down and wipe his nose. Single tear slipped down his face.

“He gave it to me because I was brave. But I’m not. I’m coward.” He started to cry, his little shoulders shaking with sobs.

“Miho, no! Don’t say that.” She hugged him tight and tried to comfort him. But she knows she must tell him the truth. “It’s not a shame to be scared. I will tell you my and Yeong shin’s story. Part of it.”

She took a deep breath and rolled up her sleeves, revealing her scarred arms. “I was soldier. I served in Lord Ahn Hyun army...”

Miho was watching her with awe, his cheeks red with excitement.

“A soldier? I thought that you were princess...”

Nilah laughed “No, I was just a common soldier. Lord Ahn gave me order. To protect one man. No matter what. That man was former chakho who came to Sangju with prince Lee Chang.”

“With crown Prince? Yeong shin knows Crown Prince?” Miho gasped. He held his pendant in trembling fingers like it was made of gold.

“Yes, he knows him well. Prince Chang and Yeongshin was fighting side by side with terrible plague. Me and several soldiers were with them.”

Miho’s eyes were big with excitement and she almost heard his little heart hammering in his chest.

“We fight in Hanyang. I was following my order and protecting Yeong shin. And there was accident. I fall through the burning roof, broke my leg and almost died. And I was scared. I was facing the flames and enemy. And I cry because I didn’t want to die. Not yet. Flames burned me, but I survived...”

“I’m not scared of fire.” Miho furrowed his brow and raised his head, his scar more visible. “I kind of like that scar. I look like warrior.”

Nilah was confused. She thought that Miho is ashamed, because of his scars.

“Then what you are afraid of?”

“It’s because of that body my father and Yeong shin found.” Miho throw his hands in the air with desperation. “I heard my father talk with aunt Bon Hwa first night we move to her house. They talk about dead man that my father found in woods and asked Yeong shin for help.”

Nilah felt sick. She knew exactly when it was. And that Yeong shin must lied to her that night.

He lied...

She was shaking and her world starts to spinning.

He lied to her, after all her fears that Sang-Ho is somewhere out there. She even started to believe that she made it up in her mind.

Maybe it was Sang-Ho who murder that man. To scared her more.

“My father didn’t know I was listening and he keeps talking. And I can’t sleep since then. He says that man was headless. And how his insides hang around him from the tree...”

“What?” Nilah though that she heard him wrong.

This cannot be...

“Someone tortures him.”

Nilah wants to scream, but pure terror froze her on spot.

“Miho, I need you to run home. And don’t come back here! Run and don’t look back!”

“But Nilah...” boy whine and his face were confused. He looked like he will be crying again.

“I said run!” she shouts at him harshly.

And Miho run. She heard his sobs when he disappeared from her sight.

Nilah was scared she almost can’t breathe. Her head was spinning.

Someone tortured him...

.... his insides hang around him from the tree...

“No!” she sobbed to her palm. “Yeong shin, you fool” She whispered just for herself.

And she run. She run towards the house, her only real home. She run and watch dark consuming her only happy place. Yeong shin was sitting on his bench, probably waiting for her. His smile froze, when he heard her quick footsteps and frantic breath.

She grabbed him by the collar and shook with him.

“Why didn’t you tell me about that dead man you found?”

He held her shaking wrist and tried to understand what she said. She was crying, screaming at him and he was surprised. “Yeong shin! It was blood eagle! You should tell me that! It was... Ahhhh!”

She let out painful cry. It was hard blown to her back that made her fall right into Yeong shin’s arms. He caught her and call her name with confusion.

At first, she thought that someone throw a rock and hit her in the shoulder blade. But the pain was still stronger and stronger and burning through her body.

And than she noticed metal tip that was poking from her skin just under the collar bone. In that moment she knows, that she has arrow in her back.

“Nilah!” Yeong shin was shaking with her calling her name until his trembling hands found arrow sticking out of her back. “No... Nilah...talk to me. I can’t...”

She felt her own heartbeat pulsing in her fresh wound, and blood dripping from her fingers. “It’s nothing...I’m fine. But you must hide. Somewhere. Run to the village!”

“Nilah, you are hurt.” He was desperately trying to stop bleeding, to help her, but he was again just helpless blind man.

“Please Yeong shin! You must save yourself. He is coming!” she cried and kissed his lips maybe for the last time.

“Who...?”

When she heard that voice, firm and tempting, her insides cramped and hair on her neck stood up.

“What a sight for a sore eye!”

There was standing tall man. His broad shoulders covered in leather and fur. Long dark hair was falling into very handsome face with green eyes. Same as hers.

“My dearest sister. It’s been a while...” he smiled, showing teeth in wild dangerous grin.

“Harlan...” Nilah whispered facing her brother and shielding Yeong shin with her body. She was so scared; terrified that her legs were not listening. Even if she wanted to run away, she can’t.

Yeong shin held her hand and in his other hand gripes long knife. She didn’t even saw him pulling it out from underneath the bench.

“I was looking for you really long time.” He made few steps closer and Nilah noticed he was carrying dirty leather bag.

“Why?”  she tried to sound brave, but she was scared of her brother. Harlan’s worst trait was his unpredictable nature. She never knew what to expect.

“Why?”  he looked like he couldn’t believe what she was asking. “Because you are my sister and I was worried. You disappeared like a ghost. Father came back home without you and furious. He told me that you run away.”

Nilah swallowed bitter tears and lifts her chin up.

“Yes, I run. That man was awful.”

“I was waiting for you sister. I was waiting for message that you are alive and safe. But I got nothing.”

“I’m sorry Harlan, I was...”

“Save your apologies. I came to this land because of father business and found out that war and plague almost devastated this kingdom. I almost lost last drop of faith and suddenly I was in Sangju and overheard two soldiers talking about Nilah. So, I start asking...”

Nilah was cold. Blood was soaking through her shirt and night air was still little chilli. But It was mainly fear of her brother what made her shiver.

“I brought you present from Sangju.” He lifts that leather bag and throw it to her feet.

“Nilah, what is it?” Yeong shin whispered when she carefully kneels down and open the bag.

At first it was terrible stench. She almost vomit when it filled her nostrils.

And Yeong shin felt that too. Realization hit him like a hammer right to chest.  It was heavy stench of rotten flesh. He wanted to stop her, but it was too late.

Nilah turned bag, bottom up and on the ground rolled round thing.

Nilah screamed.

She falls backwards, but Yeongshin caught her under her arms, trying not to hurt her more, because she sill had arrow in her shoulder.

On the ground was laying head of a man. It was probably long time since he was alive. His eyes already gone, skin grey, dark hair dirty and tangled. Even his blood wasn’t red anymore.

She wants to look away, but her curiosity was stronger and she can’t help it. Why he was giving her head of some man.

And than she noticed it. His dark hair long to chin. Little scar under his lip.

It was head of captain of Sangju guards.

On the ground before her lays head of Sang-Ho.

She covered her mouth and muffled another scream.

“You killed Sang-Ho!”

Harlan was suddenly deadly serious. His eyes sparks with anger. She knows this look and it was pure danger.

“This man, locked you in dirty cell. Ashamed you! Humiliate you and rape you. He deserves to die.” He hissed between his teeth. “And this man...” he points to Yeong shin “He claims that he loves you, but he leaves that pig alive!”

“I must!” Yeong shin barked towards Harlan. His anger taking control. “I can’t kill him. They would kill us both.”

Nilah was sitting on the ground, facing Sang-Ho’s head. His skin was grey and lifeless, eyes empty and mouth loosely agape. He didn’t even look like himself. There wasn’t his arrogant smile and too smart eyes. It was just a pile of rotten flesh.

She raised her eyes to Harlan with disgust. “It was you, the whole time. You were haunting me” she was sick when she realised what scared her in the past few weeks. “I thought that Sang-Ho found me. But it was you with his head.”

Harlan smiled again and something dark and twisted glow in his eyes.

“I dragged him here from Sangju. He was alive and he saw how you two love birds live. And then I killed him. He was really sorry that he laid a finger on you, sister. He cried and begged for your forgiveness when I was cutting off his balls.” Harlan spoke like it was nothing.

Nilah turned away and trying hard not to throw up. She never thought, she will ever be sorry for Sang-Ho. He was cruel to her, but she never, not in her wildest dreams want for him death like this. Humiliated, scared and alone.

Yeong shin grabbed her hand and his lips were on her ear.

“Nilah stay with me. What weapons did he have?”

She heard his voice like from distance. Loud buzzing in her ears and painful pulsing in her wound distracted her from reality, where her beloved man who was blind wanted to fight her brother who was one of the best fighters she ever met.

“You can’t fight him Yeong shin. I’m not worth it.”

His arms carefully wrapped around her and shield her from her brother’s sight. But over his shoulder, Nilah saw Harlan’s dark jealous eyes.

“You are worth everything.”

Nilah wanted to be in his arms forever, to feel his comforting warmth, his lips touching her ear when he was whispering secrets to her. She gently held his face in her palms trying to remember his face, to burn it into her memory forever. But the picture of him wasn’t whole without his eyes, that was hidden under dark scarf. She carefully hooks her fingers under soft fabric and pull it down. His eyes were deep and full of emotions she was feeling too. Love fear and pain.

“I love you so much.” She whispered and pressed her lips against his. She was scared that she will not have a chance to say it again. But still those words were not enough.

“That’s enough Nilah! Time to leave.” Harlan grabs her by backside of her shirt and jerk with her pulling her out of their fragile world. Her arms desperately tried to hold Yeong shin, but she was quickly losing strength because of the wound in her shoulder. She cried out loud when sharp head of the arrow twists in her flesh.

“No! Nilah!” Yeong shin scream and tries to find her. His hands searching for her without success.

Harlan raised her from the ground with victorious smirk. “This is not place for you.”

“Let me go!” she tried to fight him, but his hands held her in iron grip. Dark was getting deeper and swallowing her whole world.

“You should be a queen of this damn kingdom. Not to live with some dirty blind chakho.”

And with that words her fist collides with Harlan’s jaw, his head jerked backward. With surprised laughter he spat blood on the ground. Nilah’s hand was throbbing with pain but that satisfying feeling ease it.

“He is much better man than anyone” she hisses into his face with all the pride she had in her heart.

But Harlan just laughs. It was false cruel laughter when he made few steps towards Yeong shin.

“We can try, if your dog just barks or he can bite.”

He wanted to punch Yeong shin right into face but he was prepared for it and made quick step back and cut through the air with his knife.

“That is adorable. You wanted to fight me cripple?” Harlan raised his fist but his arm was suddenly in tight grip.

Nilah held him with all of her strength.

“Don’t you dare to hurt him!”

Yeong shin took a chance a stab Harlan, but his knife slip on armour from thick leather and made just shallow cut on Harlan’s side. But Nilah’s brother hissed with pain and anger.

His patience with sister’s stubbornness came to an end. He turns around and hit her with the back of his hand right across the face. Nilah cried and fell to the ground.

“Nilah!” Yeong shin scream and tried to calm his nerves to sense his opponent without his sight. To hear him move, to feel his presence. But all he can focus on was wounded Nilah somewhere in the darkness. Somewhere that he can’t reach her and protect her.

Hard blown to his face light up his world. It was like lightning strikes right inside his head and the pain was overwhelming. Harlan’s fists were like hammers, crushing his flesh and probably bones too. His nose gave up and cracked. Blood was filling his mouth and for a moment he thought, if it is possible to drown in his own blood.

“She is mine! Do you understand” Harlan shouts somewhere close to his face. Yeong shin tried to punch him, but his fist just flies through the air.

He was just helpless blind man. He swore to Nilah that he will protect her. He swore that nothing and no one will ever hurt her.

And he failed.

“...I killed tiger that slaughter hundred of men...I was at war and I killed Samurai with my bare hands. I fought with dead, with bravest woman by my side.” He held her hand and laid it on his chest over his heart. She must know how serious he was. “Your father can come and try to take you away from me. He will fail.”

That memory crushed his will to live. He deserves to die, because he failed her.

He lied to her.

Fist collide with his chin and crush him to the cold ground. He lay on his back breathing heavily and trying not to lose consciousness. He heard Harlan’s furious breath and heavy footsteps stomping around him in half circle. Like wolf and his pray.

“No...” he tried to stand up but Harlan kicked him in to the ribs “She is not yours!” he coughs and spat blood in the cold grass.

“She will never leave me again.” His sanity was slipping between his fingers like sand.

Yeong shin stood up and tried to straighten up himself as best as he can.

... He killed a lot of wolfs and tigers....

“She is not yours and never was.” Hot blood was dripping from his lips but he didn’t care. He wanted to spit in the face of that bastard. “You are shameful brother. You let your father sell her like a thing. You are her brother! You are the one who should protect her!”

His legs were trembling and he felt tears slipping down his face. Brothers should protect their siblings no matter what.

“I will protect her. From life with scum!”

And here it was. Yeong shin heard creak of a sword. It was sound of heavy thick sword pulled out of the scabbard.

He closed his eyes and imagined Nilah before his eyes. He saw her sitting in the grass with neighbour’s kids with flower wreath on her head. Smiling and telling stories.

He heard sword flying through the air towards him. He can’t do anything. His hands were empty so he could only prepare himself for deathly hit.

Instead of pain he heard metal loudly rings when collide with another.

“I don’t need your protection brother.” Nilah’s voice cut through the darkness. It was a long time since her voice was so firm and cold.

It was voice of fighter.

Her sword was standing in the way of Harlan’s, saving Yeong shin’s life.

~

When Harlan was beating Yeong shin, she crawl unnoticed into the house to get her sword. Her brother was too occupied with his victim that he wasn’t paying attention to her. He still saw her as a little weak sister he could beat whenever he wants to.

But she changed since he saw her last time.

She was soldier.

And she fights the death.

She bites her lip and held tight grip on arrow that was still in her shoulder and rip it out.

Wound starts to bleeding heavily but she almost didn’t feel the pain. She saw only Yeong shin facing her brother and sword aiming on his neck.

Nilah step in the way and cross her sword with brother’s.

“You will never touch him again!” she growls like wild animal. Harlan was surprised by strength of her resistance.

Nilah pushed against him and with quick stab made deep cut across his cheek, even cutting of tip of his ear with it. Crimson liquid runs down his shocked face.

She knows that she has no time. She must defeat him before lose too much blood. She already felt her fingers cold and weak.

“Don’t fight me sister!” Harlan warned her through gritted teeth. “We can go home and rule our land. Together.” Something in his voice trembled with desperation.

“This is my home, Harlan.” She held her sword tighter. She was grateful that Beom Pal bring her belongings so she can fight with weapon she knows.

Harlan attacks her again with anger in his face. Their swords collide with deafening crack. It was so quick that Nilah can only think about pain in her arms and guard Yeong shin who collapsed to the grass holding his bleeding face.

He will be good. His wounds weren’t that bad. He just needs to rest and cold compress.

Another hard hit of Harlan’s sword made her fall to her knees. She was trying so hard to resist, but her arms were shaking with weakness. Her world starts to weirdly swinging.

She knows she must win. She must win for Yeong shin. But she needs to win quickly.

“Harlan, you are my brother and I love you. I missed you, but I made my choice. I belong here” she spoke as calm as she could, to soothe the monster inside her brother.

But it was like oil to fire. Harlan’s face was suddenly red and his eyes sparks with anger his damp hair sticking to his forehead.

“You are liar!” he shouts to her face. “if you loved me, you would come back home. You choose to be just some ordinary soldier, you choose to fight against monsters and you choose him instead of me!” he tried to attack Yeong shin again, but Nilah catch his arm.

Hard blown to her face get her to knees. At firs she was shocked because she cannot breathe. But it was Harlan heavy weight what woke her up. His body collide with hers and she falls backwards to the grass. She heard Yeong shin screaming over loud buzzing in the ears.

Pain was overwhelming.

Harlan tangle fingers into her hair and another hard blown makes her cry.

“...please! I beg you...let her go!” Yeong shin was desperately calling her name and begging for her life.

She saw his fist preparing for another hit, when suddenly, out of nowhere came arrow and pierced Harlan upper arm.

He quickly stood up trying to find the archer. It wasn’t that hard.

Nilah wiped blood from her eyes and search for her saviour. She still heard ringing in her ears but she still heard him loud and clear.

“If you hit her again, I will have to kill you, pretty boy.”

She only saw silhouette. It was tall man standing on rooftop of their house with his bow ready to shoot again.

There was snap of a twig and another man appeared from the shadows of the forest.

Nilah stood up but her legs were weak. She didn’t know who these men were, but they saved their lives.

Harlan’s face was suddenly calmer.

“I give you last chance Nilah.”

She made her way to Yeong shin who was trying to find her, his fingers were trembling when he finally grasps her palm, puling her into comforting embrace.

“I’m sorry Nilah, I should protect you” he whispered desperately to her ear.

“I’m all right” she leans on him, because of wave of nausea. Nilah blinked few times trying to focus, but her view was little blurry.

“Are you?” Harlan laughed with cruelty. “You feel it already?”

Nilah gasped for air when she realised that she can’t control her hands. Her fingers were ice cold and numb.

“What have you done?” it was just weak whisper but Harlan heard her.

“Come with me and I will give you antidote” he held little glass phial with victorious smile.

“Antidote? You poisoned me?” Nilah can’t believe it, but she knows, felt, it is true. Her body was weakening in strange way. Her hands were already lifeless and her face was tingling like there was thousands of ants running just under her skin. “But how...” she realised it sooner than she finished the sentence. “that arrow...” cruel coldness creeps into her flesh. “Harlan, how could you?”

Harlan’s lips have triumphant smirk, but it was his eyes that betrayed him. He was the one who was losing.

Nilah’s legs lose the fight and she collapsed to the ground, pulling Yeong shin down with her. His face was desperate but he tried to fight with it. With desperation, anger and fear. His lips were in tight line and eyes glossy with tears.

Mysterious man on rooftop was silent and still aiming at Harlan who was standing aside.

“You just need to come with me. I will be good I swear.”

But Nilah wasn’t listening to him. She had her eyes locked on Yeong shin. He held her in his arms and it was the most comforting feeling. She wanted to touch his face, to cares his chin, but her hands were weakly laying in her lap.

“You must go with him. Save yourself” he whispered with broken voice and tenderly kissed her cold lips. He tried to be brave, but his heart ache like no wound ever aches. He’s been through a lot but nothing ever hurt like this. Like lonely heart.

“You! Swear on your life that, you never hurt her again!” he shouts at Harlan and his face was full of pain.

Nilah closed her eyes because for the first time she doesn’t want to see his face. She doesn’t want to see the misery. He will be alone again.

Harlan made his way to them, carefully watching their mysterious guard. He kneels next to Nilah and looks at Yeong shin. “I swear that I will treat her well.”

Nilah took a deep breath and single tear slip down her face.

“But I’m staying” It was single sentence that leaves both men shocked.

She was ready to die, but not ready to leave Yeong shin.

“What?” Harlan gasped; his movements frozen.

“No, Nilah...”

Nilah painfully gulps. Her whole body was like stone, cold and heavy.

“Do you remember the story about Mac Lír that our nana told us when we were kids?” she turned to her brother.

Harlan was confused, but nod.

“It was story about god who lost his love and suffer so much that his mother rather turned him into the stone.” She pressed her head more into Yeong shin’s embrace. She still felt his warm and his strong beating heart.

“Nilah, why are you telling me this?”

“/Because I rather die than feel that pain. I will not leave him. He is half of my soul. /” she spoke in their native language.

Harlan was speechless. He never thought his sister would be so brave and strong. He took her sword and pressed the handle to her palm. “/You deserve warrior’s death. Valhalla is waiting. /”

He kissed her forehead and whispered his goodbyes in ancient language. But Nilah throws her sword on the ground.

“I’m not heading to the Valhalla. That’s not afterlife I want.”

Harlan gasped for air. Warrior’s death and afterlife in Valhalla, feasting with old gods was everything. All their life has just this purpose. And she was giving it up, for what?

“I want to be with Yeong shin. I can wander thousand worlds or thousand lives just to be with him again.”

Harlan stood up and made his way into the darkness, leaving his sister dying on the ground.

“/Be it! /”

“No, stop!” Yeong shin cried out loud. He was maybe blind, but he knows Harlan was leaving with only chance to cure Nilah. He can’t believe that he will disappear and left his sister die. He just can’t accept it. It just can not happen.

*Crack*

He froze when he realised what that sound was.

Harlan throws phial with cure on the ground and crack it with his heavy boot.

It was like someone suck all air from his lungs. He cannot breathe, he cannot blink. He just held Nilah in his weak arms.

And Harlan was gone.

He disappeared in the shadows of the forest just as he appeared. Leaving misery and pain behind him.

“No...” Yeong shin was shaking. He held Nilah and can’t do nothing.

“I’m sorry. I can’t leave” she whispered weakly.

“You will be all right...just...” he sobs, hot tears run down his face.

He knows that someone was close. Someone who shoot Harlan before. Someone must help him!

„Yeong shin…I... I can’t feel you. “She whispered weakly. Her body was trembling in his arms. Laid down on the ground in his tight embrace. Tears slipping from the corner of her eyes and soaking into her hair.

„I’m here“ he choked, hating himself for being weak. He wanted to be strong for both of them. But how could he, when his dearest person, his love was dying in his arms. Cruel venom slowly stealing her from him. „I still hold you. “

„Thank you, for…“ she closed her eyes swallowing heavily.

„Don’t talk, save your strength.“ Tear slip down his face disappearing between his lips. How could his eyes cry and not to be able to see her? For the last time. He wold give up everything to see her. Just for a short moment, to remember her as best as he could.

„...thank you for loving me“ her trembling fingers touch his face gently but clumsily. She was loosing her fight against the poison. „You were the best thing that happened to me in my whole life. My dearest…“ she coughs and when he kissed her, her lips taste like blood.

“Help me...please! Someone!” it was desperate shout into darkness. But if someone hear him, what’s the point? Only cure that can help her was slowly soaking into dirt. “Nilah please…Don’t go, where I cant follow you.”

He heard loud footsteps and held Nilah closer. She whimpered and her body in his arms was limp. Someone approached them and squeezed his shoulder almost painfully.

It was footsteps of two man. He heard their heavy boots and heavy breaths.

Pair of hands tried to take Nilah from him but he was holding her, tightly pressed to the chest.

“Yun Lee? What are you doing here?” Nilah whispered weakly. Yeong shin didn’t know who that man was, but when he heard second man speak, his heart almost stops.

“Let her go” That wasn’t possible. He didn’t hear him five years and still it was like yesterday.

“You look like shit, kid.”