1,000,000 TIMES

PINNED POST ( blocking new follows unless mutuals on @/rukuan )

PINNED. ego rambles about kevin from honkai impact 3rd && not spoiler free && adult and problematic content && may write IC threads and asks on request

MUSINGS ON. becoming a monster to fight monsters && living long enough to see oneself become the villain && how deliverance spares not even its deliverer && the journey to redemption and a new beginning

" ...... " Who is he to refuse? But perhaps she should have been less specific in her request because he does as she asks, by the book: his arms wrap about her petite form and release her shortly, then his palm cups the slightly puffed top of her cotton-candy hair, flattening it a little and pulls away. One hug and one headpat. Nothing more, nothing less.

He stares at the elf girl deadpan, his bright unblinking eyes almost drilling against her soft gaze, a man blissfully ignorant of his own antics. "Anything else?"

it hurts him thinking abt what they'e done to him: MEI acted cold and almost indifferent as if she didn't care for him at all, elysia didn't tell him about being a herrscher as he were the last person she could trust with a secret... the fact elysia told even MEI, the de-facto leader of MOTH who could just lock her up on the spot, and not him makes it even worse.

the two women he cares about the most just seem to not care about him at all. but as soon as the crisis is gone and he gets to relax with either of them, he pushes away all this hurt bcs it's fine, they had their reasons, but now it's all okay.

it's not okay. it hurts to have his pain ignored and unacknowledged. he knows he'll have to voice it first and if he does, he know he will snap with anger, if not rage. and if he snaps, he'll hurt them. and he doesn't want to hurt them. he wants them to apologize to him out of their own volition and guilt, not bcs of pity or that he asked for it.

for the ppl of izumo, the kami aren't gods. they aren't admirable, aren't worthy of worship. they are bloodthirsty monsters that "came only to kill". those who wielded the edict edges would be gradually corrupted by the power of kami sealed within, mutating into [ oni ]. therefore, despite wielding god-like powers, in their eyes, they are turning into monsters. and perhaps the blob-like creatures the maiden fights in 'kyoden' are actually fellow izumans, but her senses are so diluted - both from the constant fighting and corruption of the power of kami - she can no longer recognize between friend and foe.

the people of izumo are proud humans, fine in their humanity, and fighting for their humanity. achieving godhood - thus losing their humanity - is equal to regression, decline, degeneration. and becoming just like their murderers is the last thing a person of izumo would want.

in this context, turning into a kami is, indeed, like walking backwards.

yes, it does have all authorities in the sense of 'you can achieve finality by combining all authorities available during a given [samsara] cycle'.

no, it doesn't have all authorities in the sense of 'the other authorities are projections of the cocoon / herrscher of finality on earth, so the herrscher of finality can use all the authorities'.