K.O. Conner

I got 2 pages done.

There’s something about having the will power to work on a long term project. I can work on a big project like my Supergirl / Invincible crossover. I can do a new character design. It's different mentally.

It’s hard to reopen the thing I failed at drawing earlier and try again. It's hard not to be discouraged seeing all the areas I need to improve in. I know that once I get past a hurdle, there's going to be another one.

All I want is to make stories, but I’m tired right now.

This is a marathon and everything else is a sprint.

It's going to get better.

I started with a loose story concept and some general things I think these characters would talk about. My idea was that Supergirl would chase a villain through the Phantom Zone, but they both end up in Invincible's dimension by mistake. Everyone thinks she's a Viltrumite at first.

I think there's a lot of story potential there:

• Cecil would try to access the Phantom Zone under the guise of helping Supergirl return home, but he'd actually want to use it as his own super prison.

• Round up all the escapees, but get trapped in the Phantom Zone themselves and have to survive

• Get bailed out by both sets of supporting cast members

• Kryptonians vs. Viltrumites

I almost gave up on the whole thing after a failed attempt at drawing this pose. Always try again the next day. It's never that dramatic.

I made some alterations to the Supergirl WOT suit. I added a longer collar, two fingered gloves, metal gauntlets and plates on the boots, and a metallic "S" with a new shape. I also thought the purple-y blue would be cool new look.

It was challenging to balance all of the logos. Altering them to be blue and white helped A LOT.

These poses were also super hard to do. Whenever I corrected anatomy on one, I had to change the parallelogram again and it would mess up the other character.

My new favourite setting to draw is the White Room.

This panel is meant to be a fun meta thing. I used Cory Walker's (co-creator of Invincible) Supergirl designs and referenced this image of Joe Shuster and Jerry Siegel (creators of Superman).

I made this video bc I was sad to erase part of this pose for a panel.

I learned how to tween in Photoshop. Before this, I would move pictures manually. Looks way better now and it was easier than I thought it would be.

This update is different bc I got less done and can't post spoilers. I also wanted to share some thoughts on another WIP.

I spiralled when writing this month and it bled into my illustration. I had been feeling that self inflicted pressure to make things better than before. I knew this would happen. It's so easy to forget that THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE FUN!

A Terrible Start

When I started writing again, I got hung up on wanting my next story to be better than excellent-man.

I researched different types of story structures because I'm insecure on if I do it right in the first place. I kept trying to force something to fit but nothing was working.

I completely sucked all the fun out of writing.

I heard somewhere that too much planning is delaying starting because it’s scary and uncomfortable. This was true for me. I decided to ignore story structure for now and just write how I feel like. I can’t edit something that doesn’t exist.

But I realized something. I should write how I want because I'm supposed to enjoy this. I've been trying to force my new story into a mold because I'm afraid I'm no good. I betray myself by removing what I have to offer. And that's really hard to say because I know I need to improve, and I'm not above criticism, but I can't keep second guessing all of my choices like this.

I remembered this article from 2018:

After I let go, I had a blast writing again. It's been exciting to finalize ideas and write dialogue. My fear of writing made me forget that I actually liked doing this.

Protagonist from other WIP:

I've written drafts on 2 issues!!!

All I wanted to do was work on it, so I really had to push to get moving on excellent-man. I'm also ahead of schedule so I can take it easy.

Halfway through this month, I picked up where I left off. It wasn't easy because this is the kind of thing I returned to (redo on the right):

I forgot how to draw the human body for awhile and some of my panel compositions had to be re done several times. My drawing is still feeling off, but I think it's okay. Growing pains maybe.

It's felt a bit like a chore lately and I feel like I've gotten worse. My drawing sessions have been much shorter because I've been too tired to fight through it. Nothing prepares you for the extreme low after a drawing high.

On the bright side, I am now halfway to my goal and it's only been 4 months!

Bonus Rant & PSA On Boredom

Sometimes I worry I will never have a good idea again. It’s silly because it’s not true. But I don’t help myself if I don’t let myself sit and be bored. When I was a kid, someone told me that “boredom is a choice,” meaning that if you’re bored, it’s your fault for not fixing that. When I think about it now, I actually think it’s nearly impossible to be bored. 

There’s always something to listen to, read, watch, or play (often multiple at a time). Every second can be filled so you don’t even have to think. I can watch tv and draw. I can’t watch tv and write. I can’t come up with new ideas if I’m not letting my mind wander. It feels like you actively have to choose to be bored to get anywhere.