“What’s wrong with him?” Yael asked Hakeem as she took a seat beside him. They were at her house, outside. It had become something of a custom for people to gather at the Knight home because it had so much property. Even when they had all been little, they had gathered here for special occasions or times like these, when they just wanted to get together, no reason needed.
“He heard his parents having sex,” said Danny as he walked by and took a seat. “Again.” He was the oldest of them. Well, technically, Noah was. But Noah was already graduated from college and off living a life of his own. Then Leah, who had actually just graduated and was busy with figuring out her career and applying for jobs and internships. Then there was Jolene, Aidan’s cousin, but she was studying abroad for the summer and then Danny, who had just finished his first year of college and was back home. Though technically, he was attending the New York University where his dad taught, and was hardly away, but the university was more than ten blocks from where he’d grown up, which was as good as being away when you grew up in New York City.
“Oh no,” said Hakeem sympathetically as he looked back at Aidan. He had his head in his hands, looking down as if he might be sick with a headache.
“Do you know how hard it is to pretend your parents don’t when you have to hear them and get confirmation?” asked Aidan miserably. On either side of him sat Matt and Tony. Tony was rubbing his back as if he were sick and was trying to soothe him.
“Yeah, we know, man,” said Tony. “It’s like, why do they even need to, you know? We know they love each other. They already have to make out all the time. And then on top of that, you have to hear them– or catch them. They’re so inconsiderate.”
“You’re all such babies,” Athena scoffed. “Of course our parents have sex. How do you think any of us are here right now? We already know my parents had sex at least twice. And their–” she pointed at Matt, Tony and Sam, “parents had sex twice. What’s the big deal?”
“Athena!” said Thaddeus as he turned bright red. “Can you be cool for just two seconds? Please? Please? Chill. Please?”
Athena rolled her eyes. “They’re all still human and they all still love each other. I would personally be more worried if they weren’t have sex anymore. Then that would be bad.”
“I think we all know our parents have sex, but there are those of us who like to pretend they only had sex to conceive us and then went mysteriously and thankfully abstinent to raise us,” piped up Danny.
“I know your parents have sex,” said Athena rolling her eyes at Danny.
“Yeah, I know that too, but I would prefer to pretend otherwise, Athena. Once was enough and I don’t need to relive that embarrassing fucking experience,” grumbled Danny as he stabbed some potatoes on his plate and shoved them in his mouth.
“Hey!” said Thaddeus and Sam at his use of profanity. They were both fourteen and heard plenty of foul language on television and in movies and in school and from their own parents, but it was still odd to hear it from each other.
“Sorry,” said Danny as he looked at them.
“Okay, but you don’t understand,” went on Aidan, “my parents are… they’re disgusting. They’re loud and you can hear it and it’s carnal and… it’s gross. You’re the weird one for being okay with it!” He gave Athena an accusatory look.
Athena rolled her eyes. “I’m not saying I enjoy knowing that fact, just that it doesn’t bother me to know that and that I’ve made my peace with it. Notice how I’ve never curled up into a ball and started shaking from the mere idea.” She looked around at the table and her eyes landed on Matt. “You’ve been very quiet.”
Matt shrugged. “I cried when I found my parent’s wedding photos and wasn’t invited. I’m okay with my parents being in love,” he said very nonchalantly. “Not that I want to see it or anything,” he added under his brother’s incredulous stare.
“Do not talk about mom and dad that way,” said Tony, pointing his finger at Matt.
“You know what the real problem is?” started Yael as she picked at the food on her plate. “The real problem is you all live in these tiny apartments in the city. Even Aidan’s dumb house is some weird converted firehouse that’s a loft and quite open. Great acoustics, too. So you can hear and know everything. There’s no privacy. Out here, though? Nice, big house. If my parents ever disappear, I just stay in my part of the house and wait for them to find me. I don’t have to hear them because sound is able to travel in this big open space. It’s basically Schrodinger’s cat for me, but Schrodinger’s sex. I can simultaneously know and can’t know my parents are having sex. I know because my parents are people. But I don’t know because I leave them alone if they’re not around and I’m sixteen and know how to use a phone to order food and anything else I need and they can find me when they’re done. I live in blissful ignorance.”
“We didn’t choose to live in the city,” growled Danny. “Besides, it’s not my fault when I go away to college and then I decide to come home one day and walk in on my parents doing it on the damn couch!”
“OHMYGOD YOU DIDN’T,” said Athena, gasping.
“Yeah, I did. And unfortunately, I don’t have my dad’s gift of blindness, so I had to see everything. You all should be thankful you’ve never seen your parents without clothes on.”
“You know, technically, there’s a good chance that when we were babies that our parents took us to shower with them at some point, so we have seen our parents naked. Granted, our moms probably dealt with the ladies and our dads with the boys. But, even the boys have all seen their moms boobs as babies, so I still don’t think it’s that big of a deal,” said Athena. “It’s all perfectly natural.”
“It’s because she’s British,” said Sam. “British people have no shame.”
“I don’t know, hermano,” started Tony, “have you looked at Thaddeus lately. He looks like he’s been sunburned and we haven’t even been out here long enough for that to happen. Looks like he feels plenty shame and they have the same parents.”
“It’s because I don’t think sex and the human body are anything to feel shy or shameful about,” said Athena.
“Yes, well, you look like that, so you wouldn’t,” said Hakeem.
“I want you to know that not a single one of you has been helpful even a little bit,” groaned Aidan. “Least of all, you,” he added to Athena.
Athena simply smiled proudly. “Time to grow up. Anyway, I’m going for a swim.” She got up and began to wander towards the dock at the end.
“She’s amazing,” said Tony as he watched her sashay away.
“You’re drooling,” Matt told him, making a face.