❛  i  have  a  secret …    and  i  can’t  tell  anyone  else .  ❜ ❛  i  always  kind  of  accepted  that  that’s  all  i’d  ever  know .  ❜ ❛  [ name’s ]  the one .   i  know  he  is .  ❜ ❛  god ,   stop  growing !  ❜ ❛  you  sound  like  you’re  having  fun  already .  ❜ ❛  i  used  to  have  fun .  ❜ ❛  ‘mother’ ?  we’re the same age !  ❜ ❛  you  make  me  sound  so  unromantic .  ❜ ❛  [ name’s ]  gonna  absolutely  kill  you  when  she  finds  out .  ❜ ❛  i  feel  like  there’s  a  part  of  me  missing .  ❜ ❛  you  look  like  an  old  hippie !  ❜ ❛  i  bet  you  don’t  remember  me .  ❜ ❛  you  haven’t  changed  at  all !  ❜ ❛  oh ,  please !  i’m  getting  married ,   not  joining  a  convent !  ❜ ❛  there  never  seems  to  be  a  single  penny  left  for  me .  ❜ ❛  don’t  sit  down  there !   it’s  broken .  ❜ ❛  all  the  things  i  would  do  if  i  had  a  little  money …  ❜ ❛  it’s  a  rich  man’s  world .  ❜ ❛  come on ,   let’s  go  have  fun .  ❜ ❛  do  you  wear  it  or  floss  with  it ?  ❜ ❛  that’s  the  price  you  have  to  pay  if  you  want  to  drink  before  eleven  o’clock  in  the  morning !  ❜ ❛  god ,  i’m  just  whining ,   you  know  me .  ❜ ❛  are  you  being  taken  care  of ?  ❜ ❛  are  you  getting  any ?  ❜ ❛  i’m  so  glad  that  whole  part  of  my  life  is  over .  ❜ ❛  it’s  an  adventure ,   [ name ] ,   it’s  good  for  you .  ❜ ❛  please  stay .  ❜ ❛  i  made  up  my  mind ,   it  must  come  to  an  end .  ❜ ❛  will  i  ever  learn ?  ❜ ❛  why  did  i  ever  let  you  go ?  ❜ ❛  i  can’t  count  all  the  times  i’ve  cried  over  you .  ❜ ❛  you  always  did  know  how  to  make  an  entrance .  ❜ ❛  you  don’t  know  each  other ?  ❜ ❛  why  are  you  here ?  ❜ ❛  it’s  good  to  see  you .  ❜ ❛  i’m  a  shoulder  you  can  cry  on .  ❜ ❛  you  were  always  sure  of  yourself .  ❜ ❛  why  didn’t  you  tell  us ??  ❜ ❛  i  can  still  recall  our  last  summer .  ❜ ❛  no  one’s  seen  you .  ❜ ❛  i  just …   lost  track  of  time .  ❜ ❛  you’ll  never  leave  me ,   right ?  ❜ ❛  you’ve  turned  my  world  upside  down .  ❜ ❛  i  wasn’t  jealous  before  we  met .  ❜ ❛  i  still  don’t  know  what  you’ve  done  with  me .  ❜ ❛  is  that  really  your  dream ?  ❜ ❛  well ,   now ,   that  takes  me  back …  ❜ ❛  are  you  okay ?  ❜ ❛  how  old  are  you ?  ❜ ❛  will  you  excuse  me  a  minute -  ❜ ❛  i  can’t  breathe !  ❜ ❛  give  her  some  space !  ❜ ❛  i’ve  been  tossing  &  turning  all  night …  ❜ ❛  last  night  i  discovered  something  wonderful …  ❜ ❛  you  didn’t  even …   SUSPECT  that  you  were … ?  ❜ ❛  it’s  absolutely  hush - hush  for  now .  ❜ ❛  tell  me  what’s  wrong .  ❜ ❛  i  don’t  know  what  to  do .  ❜ ❛  you  know  what  to  do .  ❜ ❛  you  don’t  have  to  do  anything .  ❜ ❛  that’s  what  YOU  want !  ❜ ❛  i  don’t  know  why  you’re  going  off  on  me  now .  ❜ ❛  what  are  you  doing  here ,   [ name ] ?  ❜ ❛  this  is  my  reality .  ❜ ❛  i  can  deal  my  own  disasters .  ❜ ❛  i  didn’t  think  it  was  any  of  your  business .  ❜ ❛  i  love  being  on  my  own .  ❜ ❛  what  ever  happened  to  our  love ?  ❜ ❛  you  made  me  feel  alive ,   but  something  died .  ❜ ❛  let’s  pick  up  where  we  left  off  last  night .  ❜ ❛  last  night  never  happened .   i’ve  drawn  a  veil  over  last  night .  ❜ ❛  i  can  read  in  your  face  that  your  feelings  are  driving  you  wild .  ❜ ❛  does  your  mother  know  that  you’re  out ?  ❜ ❛  there’s  no  plan ,   god  knows  there’s  no  plan .  ❜ ❛  what …   is  this ??  ❜ ❛  i  can’t  accept  this .  ❜ ❛  no ,   you’ll  have  to  catch  me  first .  ❜ ❛  you  have  to  help  me .  ❜ ❛  baby ?   [ name ] ?!  ❜ ❛  you  don’t  know  if  you  love  me ?  ❜ ❛  of  course  i  love  you ,   i  just  wish  you’d  told  me .  ❜ ❛  don’t  do  this  now .   i  can’t  hear  this  now .  ❜ ❛  i  don’t  want  to  talk  about  things  we’ve  gone  through .  ❜ ❛  the  winner  takes  it  all .  ❜ ❛  i  was  a  fool  playing  by  the  rules .  ❜ ❛  you  know  i  miss  you .  ❜ ❛  what  can  i  say ?   the  rules  must  be  obeyed .  ❜ ❛  this  gives  me  an  excuse  to  come  here  much  more  often .  ❜ ❛  i’m  not  entirely  sure  what’s  happening  right  now …  ❜ ❛  it’s  only  the  rest  of  your  life .  ❜ ❛  you  love  me   &   you  know  it .  ❜ ❛  if  you  change  your  mind …  ❜ ❛  take  a  chance  on  me .  ❜ ❛  if  you  need  me ,   let  me  know .  ❜ ❛  speech !   i’m  gonna  make  a  speech ,   everybody .  ❜ ❛  i’ve  got  so  much  that  i  wanna  do  when  i  dream  i’m  alone  with  you .  ❜ ❛  i  think  you  know  that  i  can’t  let  go .  ❜ ❛  i’m  gonna  do  my  very  best .  ❜

er 5.02 “split second”

past the blood and bruise, past the curses and cries, beyond the terror in the nightfall, haunted by the look in my eyes that would've loved you for a lifetime, leave it all behind.

“my exam hall was boiling hot. think i sweat through my shirt by the end of it. pretty sure they were trying to prep us for being overseas, or at least that’s probably what they’d have said if anyone complained. what about you? let me guess… freezing cold? made the wristache worse by the end of it all?”

"freezing cold, yep." she remembers it all too well. she tries not to, but occasionally the memories slip back to the forefront of her mind. as much as she tries to not let it happen, it still manages to sneak its way through. "oh no, there was no ache at all. i couldn't feel my fingers they were that blue, but why would that be a problem?"

It's Lucy.

5.14 (SCRIPT) — “The Storm: Part 1”

"Lucy." Her name is like a prayer. "Tell me what else you want..."

a hand soothes over the back of his head, playing lightly with his hair as she leans in to gloss her lips over his once more. they're teetering on the edge and with each second that passes they're that much closer to falling together. "all of you."

immediately, he smiles back, careful to smooth away the bite of anger that lingers as monica moves in his peripheral vision. “we didn’t know it could be any better,” he replies, a forced lightness to his voice. he moves a half step in front of lucy so that he can put his back firmly to the old charge nurse. “it’s going to be fun.” at this, jack reaches back slightly to knock his fist three times against the nearest hard surface, pretends with everything in him that it is wood to ward off the potential curse of the statement. he really needs to get john in on that when the younger attending dares to call a shift quiet. “or at least... watching the kids figure it out will be fun for the first half hour. you got a decent pen tucked away?”

shaking her head, her attention turns back to jack as she quirks an eyebrow at statement that the day would be fun. she thinks that might be a stretch, but she entertains him by letting him continue on. nodding her head, she scans her eyes around the wide open room as her eyes land on one of the 'kids' who currently looks as if they're more than a little lost staring at the chart in hand. "what part are we watching them figure out? how to chart on paper or use a pen?" god knows some of the handwriting she does see these days is in stark contrast to what she remembers handwriting being like when she was in school. "these kids wouldn't know what to do if they had to have an exam like we used to. three hours in a stuffy hall somewhere that was either freezing cold or boiling hot and having to handwrite it all."