Hello, I'm addressing the situation here as I did on Twitter but going a little more in depth since I have more space :)
My intent was not to hurt anyone while making this au, I should've done more research on the procedure itself and honestly I shouldn't have made the au at all! I regret doing it and now I am learning from my actions which I am ok with I think that I deserve the backlash for what I did, although I wish people wouldn't DOXX me I guess it cannot be helped.
As for the reference I used for the one art, at the time I was a little intoxicated (not saying this excuses what I did) , I didn't exactly see anything wrong with doing that since the picture was already on the internet for everyone to see but! I know now not to do that it is very disrespectful to the people who actually suffered through the procedure and I shouldve thought before acting. I didn't have any intent on mocking or making fun of the people who were hurt :(
"Romanticing Lobotomies" : THIS was NOT what I was trying to do. There is nothing okay about what I made Betty do to Simon. There is nothing "HOT" about it. It is supposed to be disgusting, the way she treated him is supposed to turn your stomach. Like someone said previously they mentioned "Killing Stalking" which was a horror book that I was VERY obsessed with a while ago and it made me want to make something of my own. Due to my hyperfixation of Fionna and Cake I decided to make it an au... In that book there are dark themes having to do with codependent relationships and there is murder and SO much more. I wanted to make something that was just as bad as that since there is NOTHING (at least I cant find anything) like Killing Stalking. Just because there are toxic relationships in the horror genre does not mean you're romanticing whatever is going on, was the creator of KS romanticing abuse and murder?? No. I KNOW the au could have been depicted better, there couldve been better words to use on the art but once again I cannot take back the things I did once they're already done.
Please think about other people first before doing things (I know this is kind of hypocritical :( but I should've done this too) I know I've hurt all of you with my art but this is hurting me too very badly and two wrongs in a situation like this doesn't make a right. I wish that some of you could be more reasonable and realize that im a human too, but I understand you want me to learn from my actions. Although SOME of you are actually wishing literal death upon me which is NOT good for my brain which leaves me to my last statement.
I am leaving the internet for a while. I am discarding the au completely, I don't want anyone to make any fanart and I don't want it to be mentioned to me again. I apologize to everyone I've hurt and I hope you can all understand.. I'm not very good at apologies but I tried super hard on this one, I just don't want anyone to see me as an awful person although that's something I can't control :(
Goodbye! Thank you to everyone who supported me and was kind to me! I love you guys, Ill be back sometime.
