☾ Nelly ☼

i crave and yearn for stability more than anything in this world. i want to always know that i am set and comfortable

Too true.

shoutout to the pain that gave me understanding

Most anti phone advice is so inane and regurgitated to me but one thing I’ve been thinking about for days is “social media is okay, but the real danger comes in when you think your phone should be your go to during your limited pockets of leisure” like that’s literally the truest thing ever

It really is true that after a long shift or a hard study session or a tiring workout the first thing I think to do is doom scroll to “reward” myself………. But as much as I try to combat my screen I’ve never truly delved into why my phone should be my go to during my downtime. Like why is it the reward . Why is it not taking a nap. Or getting a treat. Or calling a friend . Or even reading a book. It’s like I do those things w the idea in mind that that’s when I’m “on” but what if they rly should be my downtime rewards instead of phone time

And this comes from someone who does not necessarily think social media is the devil bc I totally understand why people use it and how it makes connecting easier…… but I see older patients all the time and it’s so striking to me how they don’t have attention issues and how their reward system is wired so differently. My 52 year old boss rewards herself for an 8 hour work day by taking a run after work. Like immediately after work. She does have a phone, and she does use it, but it’s not her reward during downtime at all. She does not need a phone break in between things, because those things are what nourish her. And that’s just fascinating to me bc for my generation a peek at their phone is the ultimate reward

LAST THING bc i feel like if this reaches more people they’ll be like ummm reading or talking to a friend arent downtime activities and like okay that’s so fair……. I think the whole point is finding a default downtime activity that feels right for *you* while also not taxing you mentally. Like this is not me saying go full blackout on your phone. Also it’s just true that doom scrolling is not as passive as people think it is (I literally do it too) and your brain is still burning out from taking in so much at once, so investigating if it’s the holy grail “brain off” activity really is valid

Any lesson you refuse to learn will repeat itself until you do