Something that Ive been struggling with for awhile now, is how hard it is to articulate the loss of being an adoptee.
It's a particular kind of grief for something you never had.
And how do you even begin to talk about this heavy, empty hole in your chest. This longing for something that nearly everyone around you already has.
And the worst part, is that you feel guilty for feeling this way because you know your parents love you. They've been good to you the best way they knew how.
But the second you try to talk about this lack of connection. This emptiness. They refuse to listen. Because its too hard to see your adoption as anything other than perfect and meant to be. Because deep down it hurts too much to think about why they had to adopt. Because they couldn't have their own child. So they dismiss you.
And you contain your grief. Because its too heavy for them to bear.
