I Swear This is Not Nightblogging

…Ugh.

You had to go there didn’t you? Ya just couldn’t resist. Ya had to not only give Kozue romantic feelings for her brother but ya made Miki the innocent party in all this. Once again, this complex relationship thrown out for the shitty used way too often tw*nce*st route. You just fucking had to do that. I was hoping this wouldn’t happen and we’d get something new at least but no. No. We went with this. At least it was shown as a bad thing but Kozue has been thrown under the bus AGAIN to keep Miki innocent. Fuck.

The idea I got from the chapter is that Miki and Kozue’s relationship has always had an unbalanced push/pull dynamic, where Miki is avoidant and Kozue is pursuant. Normally such a relationship would pull apart but they’re like... siblings. Twins. They’re supposed to be close.

But how close?

I actually don’t think that Kozue really even has real romantic feelings for Miki. Now this might be my gray ass self talking, but it seems like, even more than a romantic relationship, Kozue just wants TEH STRONGEST relationship with her brother. And in her mind (and let’s be honest, in a lot of people’s minds) the strongest relationship IS a grown-up, romantic one, with the kissing and the hanky-panky. Miki is Kozue’s idealized relationship, idealized person. In fact, Miki is SO idealized that Kozue spends most of the chapter impersonating him. She wears his clothes, has her hair cut like his, and most importantly, plays his music (we’ll come back to the music). This is Utena so it isn’t subtle; Miki is Kozue’s Prince.

(Also Kozue’s actual husband can’t become Kozue’s Prince bc he’s in jail.)

On the other hand, Miki is primarily concerned about HIS reputation and HIS image, and I think this comes across mostly in the unfinished Sunlit Garden. Basically, here’s this unfinished bit of music that REALLY isn’t all that complex (source: I’ve been playing piano for 18 years), and he can’t finish writing it? He’s supposed to be this great performer/composer (Touga refers to him as “Pianist”) and he can’t finish this one bit of music. And it’s Kozue’s fault. Because he could only play his best when Kozue was playing with him. And now she won’t play with him, because she wants to be close but they’re siblings and he’s a man and he doesn’t need her to be that close and what would people think. Also because she’s in a coma.

So it’s Kozue’s fault. If Kozue were here--specifically, if Kozue were here the way Miki wants her to be--she would fix it. Kozue would fix everything. And this is Utena so it isn’t subtle; Kozue is Miki’s Prince.

Of course, Miki doesn’t want to be Kozue’s husband, and Kozue doesn’t want to be Miki’s Fix-It Felix. But they keep chasing each other around in this cycle where Miki wants Kozue to be A, and Kozue doesn’t want that so she tries to be B, and Miki doesn’t want that so he’s like “I won’t talk to you until you’re A,” and Kozue doesn’t want to be left behind but she also can’t be A, so she tries even harder to be B.

But the key point here is that they are, after all, siblings. And they have a relationship, and they do, actually, want that relationship. It’s just this stupid idea of Princes preventing them from meeting in the middle and having a relationship that’s more involved than “I need your extra two hands so that I can play piano” and yet not at the level of “let’s tw*nc*st.”

And, again, once Utena helps them throw the idea of Princes out the window altogether, the relationship is able to resume growing and evolving.

TL;DR: Don’t try to be a Prince. Don’t make other people be your Prince. Just forget about Princes. It’s not worth it.

Okay, so he’s got a girly face, and he wears tights and some high boots. Sure.

But check out that noble steed. That’s one ready-to-kick-ass-and-take-names steed.

While other princesses just run away and leave nothing, Philip gets AN INVITE TO HER HOUSE. He gets a song, a dance, and a first date.

He comes home, just to tell his dad he’s not going to marry the princess because he’s in love.

No. Other. Reason. He rides in and is just like, “I met the girl I’m going to marry. Now I’ve got a birthday party to be at. Bye Dad.”

Now how much do you think his dad weighs? That short fat little man? Probably pretty heavy.Not a problem for Prince Philip.

And then he gets jumped by goblins, both hands tied behind his back

But that’s not enough to stop Prince Philip.Oh no.

He breaks his hands free and starts chucking goblins.

Look at that face. That face. The “BITCH JUST YOU WAIT” face. He may be tied down by a dozen goblins but he’s not gonna take no shit from this witch.

In fact, he’s so strong, she ends up keeping him chained to the wall, but he still fights back.

Now when he finally does get free–

He’s ready to go into battle UNARMED. He don’t need no shield or sword, he’s going to go punch Maleficent’s face in with his fist. If Flora didn’t stop him, he probably would have, too.

Backed up against a cliff edge, nowhere to go. Fighting off goblins. But there’s so many and just one Philip.

NBD I’LL JUST JUMP AND SLIDE DOWN THE ROCK PILE IN MY SKIN-TIGHT TIGHTS.

Gate closing?

who gives a fuck? certainly not prince philip.

Lighting hitting rocks around me?

NBD BRO

Giant forest of thorns?

Bitch, get out of my way. I’ve got a princess to save.

Giant dragon of hell?

CHARGE HEAD ON.

Fire? Dragon? Burning dry twigs? No. Fucking. Problem.

Just smack that bitch on the nose.

Sheer cliff face? Fire burning behind me? Back to a wall?

Calm down guys, I got this.

I’LL JUST FUCKING SCALE IT ONE-HANDED.

And fight the bloody beast from 500 feet high, with literally nothing to save me if I fall.

Lose the shield off the cliff?

JUST STAND THERE AND SMILE ‘CAUSE I’VE GOT A FUCKING MAGIC SWORD THAT’S GOING THROUGH YOUR HEART BITCH.

Just chuck it. Straight through.

Then jump out of the way…

And survive. That’s what happens to bitches who mess with the woman I love.

Get the horse.

Get the girl.

EXPLAIN NOTHING.

that’s how he EARNED his happily ever after.