love, K

With time, you will come to know the wisdom of Allah in everything that has happened to you. You will come to realise that He has been more merciful to you than your own self.

When Allah told the Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, "Your Lord has not abandoned you, nor does He hate you," these weren't just private words for him alone. By including this message in the Quran, Allah made it a timeless reminder for every struggling believer, that we will never be forsaken by our Creator.

You hate yourself so loudly. You hate yourself at the top of your lungs. Your loathing for yourself permeates your speech. “Sorry I’m just rambling.” “Don’t worry about it.” “Just ignore me.” “Sorry if I’m annoying you.” “Sorry I don’t make sense.” “Sorry about that.” Sorry, sorry, sorry. You act as if you have to beat everyone else to the punch. As if the punching bag is you. If you hate yourself first, if you hate yourself loudest, then nobody will hurt you. You clapped your hands over your ears and shut your eyes and balled yourself up so that you’d never have to experience people’s loathing for you. And it meant you never heard their love. You drowned it out. You screamed your hatred over it. And you never got to hear it.