kiss now, bang later

the guy who designed scythes definitely knew that shit was badass. he didnt care about wheat

multiple ear piercings is the only answer

something that’s positively magical about shakespeare is we mock and overquote famous parts of his text to the point of cliché but as soon as they’re heard in context they’re still affective and poignant, as though they’re being heard for the first time

no gods no masters just milfs

Something I’ve realised working in retail is that………..ppl just don’t fucking read……

Happy Friday sluts let’s do nothing and die

a vampire stands on the front porch of a farmhouse and says “i cannot come in unless i am invited”. the vampires friend, a cowboy, says “cmon, you know youre always welcome here, partner.” the vampire begins crying.

going to school surrounded by nerds really puts everything into perspective. i get those jocks in the movies. i get exactly how they feel

I love Lilo And Stitch bc even though it makes me sad David just goes and blames what he thinks is a normal dog for making things worse for Nani and Lilo and it’s constantly funny to me

rosencrantz and guildenstern played by eric andre and hannibal buress