queen of hell

I know that I can have a life outside of you guys, and I’m trying to find a balance. I’m just afraid if I don’t take as much time with you all then it’s all going to disappear. I’d rather know that I can spend time with you than anyone else. I know that I had the best protection, but I want to make sure I can also rely on me.

You want to know a secret about us Petrova women? No matter what life throws at us, we come back clawing and screaming until we win. I’ve done it thousands of times for five hundred years, and it’s given me my children, and Kai, and your mother and now you and your brothers. Turn all your pain and fear into power and you’re unstoppable, Aurelia, take it from me. Or, you can give it to me, and I will carry it and fight tooth and nail for you until the end of time. Whatever you do, I will do that. And, while I’d love to say the best way to rely on yourself is to be a vampire, I cherish you and Damien’s humanity just as your parents do, so if learning to fight as you are is what you want, then that is what we’ll do.

Do you have all day to listen to me.

I do, so you may as well tell me.

“I don’t think any of us question you doing anything to keep us safe no matter the cost. And they wonder where our protective and vengeful nature comes from. But enough about that what about you? How are things with you and the old man?”

“If anyone were to wonder that about you and your siblings, or Rebeca for that matter, they’d be a fool. I’m fine, and things with Kai are wonderful as always. Everything finally feels as if it’s going right, so I have no complaints.”

“None of us would blame you for leaving though. I know that I wouldn’t, but it makes me happy to know you want to be around just as much as I want you here. Trust me I doubt that they will cross you knowing how angry they’ve made you. And if they do they’re idiots.”

“If I go anywhere, it won’t be without a fight. Which is admittedly, still a bit strange for me but I would never leave any of you behind. Well, you never know, some people are foolish that way. But, if they should then it can be their funeral. At the cost of keeping you all safe I have no problem doing what’s necessary.”

Oh I’m sure that is babe but I could name others.

What would those be?

I don’t know if it’s not realistic. I went an entire life without my family and I can’t imagine willingly doing it over again. I want you around. But I would greatly appreciate any lessons. I just want to feel safe without worrying about relying on someone else.

Well, I can’t fault you for that. I spent centuries alone before I found your father and his siblings and the separation was infinitely worse than running for five hundred years. You won’t ever be alone, Aurelia, but you can have a life outside us. I'll teach you what I can. There won’t ever be a day where you’re in danger so long as I have something to say about it.

I would like to know how to protect myself. I won’t always have family around to keep me safe and I’d like to know I can even if I won’t use the knowledge. Unless you really want to tag along with me everywhere.

While I’m sure everybody would be thrilled if you followed us around everywhere, you’re a teenager, so I know that’s not realistic. If you want to learn some things, I can teach you. Most of us could, actually, especially your mother. 

Isn’t that why you love me though?

It’s certainly part of it.

“Mom, I’m fairly certain half the town would help with that at the very least. Doesn’t mean I don’t worry about it though. I don’t understand the superiority complex at all they don’t deserve it. I’m sure it wouldn’t be a problem convincing Kai to help you out.”

“I’m sure that they would, but I’m still going to make sure I have the ability to take care of things myself. That superiority complex ran me out of town once before, but I have too many of you to think about for me to run away again. Even if I have to take care of them all one by one, none of you or your siblings’ children will be touched. And, no, it wouldn’t. Believe me, I’ve already thought about it.”

No we can’t, and we know it’s best to not provoke you.

Yes, because you are such a peacekeeper when provoked.

I know that we’re as safe as one could be. I have too many people in my life that will do what they can to make sure nothing bad happens to me. Not many people have that. I just wish I could protect you all too.

It’s the fortune of being born to a family full of vampires. Nobody is ever going to let anything happen to you, or your brothers, or your cousins. I’m sure if you really wanted to, we could teach you how to fight but it’s certainly not necessary. We’re all well equipped to protect ourselves, if it comes down to it.

That doesn’t mean the kids won’t be caught in the cross hairs. No one would ever doubt that you will do what you can to protect us, I honestly have no idea how the witches thought it was a good idea to take your family from you knowing you’ll come for them eventually.

If anyone tried putting them in the crossfire, I would skin them alive. And I doubt I would be the only one willing to do so. Well, they’re witches, they have that annoying superiority complex. They’ve stolen so much of your lives from me, it’s not going to happen again. Even if it takes Kai and his sister tracking them down so I can see to it myself this time.

I know the moment I take you for granted you’re gone and out of my life.

We can’t have that.

Maybe, but I’m not completely against taking some time off so I can spend time with my family without being stressed. He’s not fooling me, but it’s fun to let him think it is. I already know mom will never let it happen again, and dad will help her out with it.

You have plenty of time to make those choices, sweetheart. But nothing you do could ever be stressful to your parents or the rest of us, we’ve all been through far worse than that. Oh, that’s just Kai, you learn to work around it. But Beca and Oliver would never let anything happen to you and Damien, or the little one. None of us could ever dream of it.

I’d worry more about the kids not getting hurt. The rest of us can handle ourselves, but I know that no one can handle anything happening to the kids.”

The council only cares about killing us scary vampires and protecting humans, so the kids should be fine. However, you and the others are my children, so regardless of your capabilities to protect yourself, I still have to keep anything from happening to you.

It does help knowing you as well as I do in every way.

I’m sure it does. It’s fortunate you haven’t taken that for granted yet.

I don’t want to be away from my family now that I have myself surrounded by it, but I still want an education. Just without leaving you all. I know you and grandpa Kai won’t let anything happen to me though. He’s made that quite clear even if it was under the guise that he was doing it for you.

Well, I’ve never done college myself so I’m afraid that’s the one thing I can’t help you with. But, Whitmore seems to be a good school, it isn’t far from here. I know Damien is planning on going. Don’t let Kai's act fool you, love, he has a soft spot for your mother just as much as you. You are right, though, nobody will let anything tear our family apart again. I’m not convinced Beca herself wouldn’t set fire to the world until it met the one I’d set, if she had to.