Clara And Daffodil

For the love of God, sound on.

i love cutthroat kitchen but bingewatching makes it really stand out how often alton brown refers to himself as ‘daddy’ and makes contestants wear spreader bars

I’m sorry what

#I CAN’T BELIEVE I NOW KNOW WHERE TO BUY THE EXACT FETISH GEAR THEY USE ON MY FAVORITE COOKING SHOW

@genericrevenge

OKAY BUT WHY THE FUCK ARE THEY USING SPREADER BARS ON A COOKING SHOW??!??! DOESNT THAT MAKE IT KINDA HARD TO COOK???!?

@datas-vibrating-robot-dong this seems like your speed

This post just keeps going new places every reblog cycle.

theres like a guarantee that if someone’s url ends in “course” or “discourse” theyre an asshole

Tumblr flagged this post but I would appreciate any reblogs before the holidays! These have been very helpful to a lot of disabled people and me personally!

I’ll never forget

Wtfgstagashshshshslspznxbxbdisjssnsj

man: has anyone ever told you you’re beautiful? me: oh no sir, today is my first day out of doors and papà forbade mirrors in the house lest we fall victim to vanity

Johnny’s parents: where did you get that golden fiddle? where have you been all day? you what? you fucking what??

sweet fuck vampires are pale b/c they’re anemic

Did you only just realize this? They also suck blood because they cant get vitamin d from sun exposure.

take a multivitamin you melodramatic victorian appropriating eternal dumbasses

This is my favorite description of a vampire ever

Y’all will lyft to to your next dick appointment but won’t lyft your hands up in glory to god

Whose mama wrote this