American erotica novel: he inched ever closer to me.
Canadian adaption: he 2.54 centimetered ever closer to me.
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@kavi-emm
American erotica novel: he inched ever closer to me.
Canadian adaption: he 2.54 centimetered ever closer to me.

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smash that mf reblog if u hate pedophiles
You know that post with the broken likes? If this doesn’t get enough reblogs to crash the icon then I’m fucking rioting
I think about this video often…
what the hell is going on in this country?!
Well damn
Shit has been bad for a while
Right so this lady was smart, if you’re ever in a sedan-style trunk there’s a little pull tab that you can use to get yourself out that is STANDARD in cars built after 2001. It’s the law just like headlights and seatbelts.
if you are in an SUV style vehicle or newer model car you may be able to find the automatic trunk release wire, pull on it, it will pop the trunk
if you can’t find any of that stuff,look for the brake light housing. You will need to pull back the trunk carpeting and feel about. It’s probably bolted in, but some careful wiggling will dislodge it. If people see a goddamn arm waving out of a hole in a car while they poke along I-95 they likely will do something about it
Reblog to save a life….
IT’S BACK
I ALMOST CRASHED ON THE FREEWAY BECAUSE I REMEMBERED THIS AND WAS LAUGHING SO HARD
EVERYONE NEEDS toWatCH THIS IM cRYIGN
OH MY GOD WHAT IS LIFE.
I was laughing so hard I was crying not kidding rn
This appeared again and I didn’t even need to watch it to start laughing
Why is this so funny
i know every single word to this video up by heart
this makes me so happy

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“My dad teaching math in Southern California (late 70s/early 80s)”
literally the only math class i would ever look forward to
he’s finally retiring after teaching for 40 years at the same school, so the yearbook had him recreate the picture
why is this actually one of the funniest videos i’ve ever seen .
this 7 second video has no business being this funny
okay but why was he summoning pterodactyls?
A year ago, everything was different. And now I look back I realized that a year can do a lot to a person.
The sea toads and coffinfishes are a family of deep-sea anglerfishes.
These are bottom-dwelling fishes found on the continental slopes of the Atlantic, Indian and Pacific Oceans at depths to at least 2,460 m (8,070 ft). Of the two genera in the family, Chaunacops typically occurs at deeper depths than Chaunax, but with considerable overlap.
They have large, globose bodies and short, compressed tails, and are covered with small, spiny scales. The first dorsal fin ray is modified into a short bioluminescent lure which dangles forward over the mouth, which is turned upwards so as to be nearly vertical. The sensory canals of the lateral lines are especially conspicuous.
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This should be satire.
We do not deserve this world.
this can’t be rea—
…oh
me and my gf staring into each others eyes because we’re engaging in a psychic battle of wills but also because we love each other
hey @staff miles is pretending to have a girlfriend again can you delete his blog now?
shes real she goes to another website
imagine being stuck in a room surrounded by everyone you’ve ever had sex with
#empty chairs at empty tables
imagine being stuck in a room surrounded by everyone you’ve ever thought about having sex with
oh god NO
oh god YES
Imagine your cousin sitting there wondering what he has in common with these people
what
Any Blog without this picture will be deleted in the following 24 hours.
Apparently, jokingly spreading your legs when the dentist says “Open wide” is FROWNED UPON IN THIS ESTABLISHMENT.
I’m done with tumblr.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming