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*Losing a best friend is hard. Having them show back up years later when they're supposed to be dead? Harder. What about when the feelings you had for each other start worming their way back up to the surface? Shit, feelings are such complicated things.
*Genre: angst, fluff if you squint, 18+, nsft,
*Pairing: Dabixfem!OC Kei (the character is fem presenting w/fem anatomy, but other physical descriptors are vague so can be read as a fem!reader insert)
*this could be triggering to those who have experienced the above, its not overly graphic in its violence, it is explicitly spicy though so fic is under the cut*
Kei spent an ungodly amount of time in the bathroom. Showering took longer than she thought it would, she was in worse shape than she anticipated. Then came the troubles of drying off, cleaning and dressing her wounds, getting dressed, drying her hair, and finally finally getting to brush her teeth. The ladies at the drugstore must think she’s crazy for buying all this gauze and medical tape. It never goes to waste though.
Stepping out into her living room she saw that Dabi had made his home in the corner of the couch. For a moment her eyes drifted to the kitchen where the vegetables she had been cutting still sat out, rotting. They could wait until morning, she decided. Kei came and sat on the corner of the coffee table in front of Dabi.
For a while they sat, sharing a comfortable silence. The exhaustion of the last few weeks finally catching up with both of them. Kei leaned forward, propping her elbows on her knees, letting her eyes flutter shut. Sleep while being held hostage was not the most restful.
XXXX
Dabi let his eyes wander over the woman in front of him, taking in every detail, every burn, every bruise. He wished he could do for her what she did for him. That he could patch her up, take care of her injuries. But, as of right now, he couldn’t. He could just do his best to keep her safe. Without thinking, he leaned forward, propping his elbows on his knees as well, the distance between them just scant inches, so he could see her better. She must have heard him move because a second later her eyes opened.
XXXX
He was close. Much closer than she thought he would be. Her heart was racing, but she didn’t feel panicked or anxious. Having him in her space now felt natural. So much so that it took her a moment to realize he was leaning in. He stopped, just shy of her mouth, and held her gaze. This time there was no slamming door, no angry father. Just curiosity. He needed to know, did she want him too?
Kei’s eyes flicked from his lips to his eyes, before bringing one hand up to tangle itself into his mess of dyed hair. The white of his roots were starting to show. She leaned in, hesitating for just a moment to look at him from this close, then she kissed him. Her other hand found its way to his shoulder, fingers digging slightly as he pressed into her.
He pulled away a fraction of a second later, causing her frown.
“Wha-”
“Tell me to stop,” he whispered hoarsely, “Tell me that I should go.”
“Do you want me to?” Kei asked.
“Fuck no,” he swallowed, “but, if you don’t tell me to I won’t.”
“I don’t want you to leave though. I don’t want you to stop,” she said quietly. “I want you to stay.”
“I want you to stay,” she repeated. A confession of sorts. An admission. The truth. She wanted him to stay with her, or her with him. Always.
He let out something between a sigh and a groan, then pulled her back to him.
XXXX
Kei was going to be the death of him, he was sure of it. He couldn’t decide how, but he knew it would be because of her. The little sounds she made, how soft her lips were, the smell of her shampoo. Even the way she hummed as he ran his hands from her shoulders, down her sides to hook behind her knees, pulling her into his lap. Her startled gasp let him deepen the kiss, as one hand traced its way back up to her waist and the other found its home buried in her hair. Adjusted to the new position, he felt Kei sink into the kiss, her arms wrapping around his neck.
He would be surprised if he let her sit anywhere other than his lap from now on. The way she fit in his arms and against his thighs made him think that they were made for each other. He pulled away, just for a second to get a better angle against her lips, but she must have thought that he was going to stop again.
“Stay,” was all she said. It wasn’t a question, and yet he knew it wasn’t a demand either. Dabi also knew that if he did stop, if he decided to leave, she would let him. Without another word, she would let him go. It was more like she was revealing a hope, something she desired. He knew he was a monster, but he couldn’t be one to her. Not that he was planning on leaving after she first told him she wanted him to stay, but after hearing her say that one word, he was willing to never leave her apartment again.
Still, he couldn’t help the grin that tugged at the corners of his lips.
“Say please,” were the words he mumbled against her mouth.
He felt, more so than he heard her laugh before she said “Please.”
Digging his fingers against her scalp he pressed another kiss to her lips, loving the way her smile felt against him.
XXXX
The way his lips moved against hers had Kei melting into his touch. She felt like she was trying to slip under his skin, and he hers, with how close they were holding each other. The way he felt under her fingertips was so warm, so wonderfully solid. Her skin blazed wherever he touched her, her heart drummed in her chest, and she felt so at home in his grasp.
She had no way of knowing this, but they both shared the same thought: this was so much more than what they could have ever dreamed in middle school. So much more. The initial innocence of a first kiss long lost in the soft moans that filled Kei’s living room.
Dabi’s hands roamed, leaving a trail of fireworks behind them, never settling long, giving a quick squeeze then moving on. Kei kept hers anchored in his hair, tugging ever so gently, so she could kiss him where she wanted to.
When Kei needed more air than she could get against his mouth she pulled away, though she would have gladly went on kissing him. She rested her forehead against his and for a moment the only sound that filled the apartment was the rapid rise and fall of their breathing. Dabi pressed a quick kiss to her lips before trailing to her jaw, then down to her neck, making himself busy.
XXXX
The way his name rolled off her tongue was addictive. He wondered, as he drug his tongue over a new bruise on her neck, how he had never thought about it before. How much he loved the sound of her voice, how much he loved the way she said his name, the one he chose. How much he loved her.
He hadn’t thought about it in those terms until the conversation he had with Hawks. He loved her. Not in the same way he had in middle school, though he did love her then. It was perhaps the same on a very basic level, but there was more to it now. More than he thought he would ever understand, and perhaps he never would, but he was willing to spend the rest of his life trying.
XXXX
Feelings were such complicated things. Kei knew this, she had thought this on more than one occasion, but there was such an odd mix of hazy confusion, and startling clarity coursing through her as he nipped at her collarbone. She was dying. She had to be.
It was the only explanation for how she felt as his breath fanned against her skin. Everything she felt was in contradiction to itself. Her heart was racing, she shook, and yet she felt no anxiety. No panic. She knew she was breathing, but her lungs felt like she was getting too much air, and not enough at the same time. He was making her feel impossible things. Things that didn’t make any sense, but felt as easy as falling in love with him had been.
He was flawed in all of the right ways. Perfect imperfection. A walking contradiction.
His mouth drifted back up to the column of her throat, teeth and tongue grazing against her skin. She wasn't sure if she would be able to tell what bruises were his, and which weren’t, but she had a feeling he would know. He would be able to trace each one with a calloused fingertip, tell her exactly how he made it, what sounds she had made as he left them.
She tugged lightly on his hair, pulling him away from her throat. Ducking her head she caught his lips with her own, hoping it would do something to ease the burning she felt. Untangling her hands from his hair she let them wander over his chest and shoulders, eventually slipping under his coat, pushing it over them. His hands left her waist to shake the sleeves off, then went straight back to their previous home on her hips. Between kisses Kei managed to mumble “Shirt,” as her hands found their way to his hem.
Pulling away, Dabi had a mischievous look in his eyes, “What about it doll?”
Cocky bastard.
“Please,” she said against his mouth, “You know what I mean.”
He hummed for a moment, “No,” was what he finally said, “I don’t think I do.” She could hear the smug teasing behind the words. “I need you to spell it out for me. Tell me what you want.”
XXXX
One of his hands had come up and he was now holding her by the chin as he brushed his thumb across her kiss swollen lower lip. If only he could frame the look on her face, the half parted lips, the blush spread across her cheeks and the hazy look in her eyes. He would keep it with him to look at every day. He would just have to settle for making her look at him that way every day.
Though, he really wasn’t settling. Quite the opposite in fact.
XXXX
Kei knew what she wanted, and she knew if she was going to get it she would have to play along. She drug a fingertip down his chest then back up, stopping at the hollow of his collarbone. She let it rest there for a moment before heading back down towards where her other hand had stayed, gripping his hip, just above where her thighs sat. As she reached his hem once more she moved both hands lower, near the waistband of his pants, then slipped the tips of her fingers under his shirt. The way she felt him tense under her hands was almost enough to make her continue her teasing. There would be plenty of time for that later though.
“I want you to take your shirt off,” she murmured against his mouth, fingers curling down, under his waistband.
His hands found hers, guiding them back up and taking his shirt in their hands, then pulling the garment up and over his head. “Now, was that so hard baby girl?”
Tossing the shirt to the side Kei said nothing and kissed him instead, letting her hands roam his chest. Fingers traced invisible shapes and danced across his scars while she pressed searing kisses to his lips and the scarred flesh of his jaw and neck. The way his breath hitched at the first press of her lips against his jaw, the slight hesitation she felt in his grasp on her hips almost made her pause. She thought better of it, if she had, and she had pulled away, even just to tell him how beautiful he was, how much she wanted him, wouldn’t have had the same effect as if she were to just keep kissing him, mumbling against his skin.
“So good,” she breathed, just one of the praises that left her lips as she trailed kisses back up the side of his neck, stopping at the corner of his jaw, right under his ear. The shaky exhale that earned, along with the tightening of his grip once more told her that was the right choice. He let out a muffled “Fuck,” at the pull against his skin.
XXXX
His thoughts were scattered, each screaming and fighting to be heard first. Eventually one drowned out all the others. He needed her shirt off. A smaller voice said he wanted everything she was wearing off of her and on the floor, and he knew it was only a matter of time before that was at the forefront of his mind, but his immediate desire was to have as little between their chests as possible. She had made her way back up to his mouth, so he felt her moan against his lips as his hands crept under her shirt.
He half expected her to tease him, make him use his words like he had her, but nothing of the sort happened. The shift of her hips against his lap as she moved to help him lift the baggy shirt over her head made him dizzy. If his eyes were more than half open he had a feeling the rest of the room would look fuzzy to him. Even still, the only thing he saw clearly was her.
His hands were quick to move, eagerly exploring what he had felt over her tee-shirt with the sensitive pads of his fingertips. They ran from around her hips, over her stomach, across her collarbones and shoulders, to her covered breasts. She was so soft against him. So soft under his touch.
He kissed her a little longer, a little softer, for each bandage his fingers ran across. Every scrape drew a whispered praise between kisses, some leaving his tongue even before he had fully pulled away. Each bruise he glanced had him pulling her closer, holding her flush against him if only so that he couldn’t mistake the rise and fall of her chest against his for anything but proof that she was alive.
She was alive.
XXXX
Everything was beginning to feel like too much, and not enough. If he held her any closer they would be sharing skin, but if he didn’t hold her closer she felt like she would cease to be. If he didn’t keep kissing her she wouldn’t know how to breathe on her own, but if he didn’t put his mouth somewhere else her lips would be swollen for the rest of time with the feeling of him. She needed him everywhere, desire burning a bright blue with every kiss, every drag of his fingers against her skin, every sound.
She wanted him, desperately.
XXXX
As she pulled away from him, Dabi couldn’t stop himself from trailing after her. He didn’t kiss her again, at least not before she whispered his name. It was so quiet he almost didn’t hear it, but soon after she repeated herself. It took everything in him to hide how needy he felt, to keep himself from sounding so completely and utterly desperate for more as he asked “What’s up dollface?”
He watched as she studied his face, lifting his hands to draw circles on her hips as he waited. Dabi knew that whatever she wanted, whatever she asked him, he would give her, he would do for her.
“Tell me you’ll stay, tell me,” she paused, eyes flicking from his to the side.
“Tell you what,” he urged.
“Tell me that you want more,”
He fought the urge to scoff at that. More wasn’t a big enough word for what he wanted. “I want everything that you’re willing to give me,” was his reply. After a moment he asked “What do you want?”
This time there was no teasing, no taunting behind his words. The silence between them seemed to stretch, reaching into every corner of her apartment. It was only a matter of seconds, Dabi knew, but it felt like hours. He had an idea of what she might say, of what might have her trying to get him to take control. No doubt if this were a different set of circumstances he would in a heartbeat, he would detail every filthy, wicked thing he wanted to do with her, make her beg. Hell, he still might make her beg.
However, even with all these thoughts swirling around in his head, he wasn’t prepared for how hearing her say it would make him feel. There were not enough words to describe what hearing her say those six words did to him.
“I want you to fuck me.”
This time, there was no question, he groaned. One of his hands left her hips to cup her jaw, bringing her close enough to kiss again. He was trying, so goddamn hard, to be gentle with her. As if to show him how she felt about that thought, she ground her hips against him, seeming to say “There will be time to be gentle later,” Still, he fought it, at least he tried to. The feel of her moving on his lap, and the way she grabbed his hand, placing it over her chest shredded the last piece of him that was trying to take this slow.
“You’re a brat, you know that right,” he muttered, hooking his hands under her thighs as he stood up from the couch. She hummed in agreement as she wrapped her legs around his waist, drawing a chuckle from him. The door to her room was open, which he remedied by kicking it shut behind them.
Her smell coated his senses as he laid her on the bed, caging her under him. A wicked grin tugged at his lips, “You know what? I think,” he mused, sitting back on his knees as he trailed a finger over her sternum, “That since you didn’t specify, I’ll fuck you with my fingers first. Then maybe,” the finger hooked around the fabric joining the cups of her bra, dragging it down, “Maybe I’ll fuck you with my tongue. And if you’re good, after that I’ll fuck you the way you want. How’s that sound, hm?”
The heaving breath she sucked in, coupled with the small nod and way her mouth hung slightly open was all the answer he really needed. Still, there was one more thing he wanted to do, before moving on. He shifted on the mattress, snaking a hand behind Kei’s back to undo the clasp of her sports bra.
Pulling the garment off he dropped it to the floor next to the bed. So fucking perfect, he thought. Or at least he thought he said that in his head, but the look on Kei’s face told him he said it out loud. He smiled, let her hear it.
Leaning over her he pressed a kiss to her lips, then along her jaw, down her neck and across her collarbone.
“S’true,” he said, revisiting a hickey he had left earlier briefly. “Everything about you is perfect, it’s infuriating, really,” between kisses he said, “You’re wicked smart,” a kiss. “You’re funny,” another. “You read, incessantly, even though you don’t need to with your quirk,” this one was on her shoulder. “You eat out more than you cook,” back against her neck. “You’re kind, to a fault,” just under her ear. “You have freckles along your collarbone,” against a patch of said freckles. “Your hips fit so well in the palm of my hands,” against her sternum, “And,” he mumbled, finally deciding to get to the point, “you have great tits.”
His mouth was now pressed to the top of a breast, the hand that wasn’t braced against the bed teasing the other with the tips of his fingers. The way she arched into him as he latched onto her was everything he wanted, pressing the soft flesh further into his face and hand. The sound of his name slipping from her lips as she buried a hand in his hair, slurring into a cacophony of gasps and moans could play on a loop in his mind and he would never want to stop listening.
Peering up at her through his lashes was quite possibly one of the worst, most wonderful ideas he had ever had. The look on her face had him straining against his pants. He watched as she moaned at the feeling of his tongue flicking against her nipple, as he rolled the other between his fingers. Sucking and dragging his teeth and swirling his tongue over her, once, twice, a handful of times had him wishing for more time. With a sound he wasn’t quite sure how he would describe, he switched, making sure to leave a few marks along the way.
The way she clenched her thighs against his hips, struggling not to buck into him was the best kind of torture. He trailed open mouthed kisses down her stomach as a hand came to rest on the waistband of her shorts.
“S’this okay,” he asked, lips brushing the skin of her abdomen.
“Yes,” Kei breathed, “please.”
Dabi moved, lifting her hips and pulling off the rest of her clothes in one go. After he settled her back against the mattress he pressed a kiss to her lips. “Spread your legs just a little-” he felt her shift under him, “- yeah just like that.” A series of quick kisses down her stomach, a lingering kiss against her right hip, then he was dragging a finger between her legs.
She was so wet and he had a feeling there would be an equivocal mess in his pants. He teased a finger against her, not quite slipping inside, then moving to rub against her clit. The small whimper of frustration that left her as he put off doing as she asked and fucking her (mind he would, absolutely sensless) was utterly adorable. He knew she wouldn’t feel that way, but he had a feeling he could convince her to see things his way. He just needed to feel her up.
No, that wasn’t right. Hear him out, she needed to hear him out, was the phrase he was looking for. He liked feeling her up better.
“Don’t worry baby,” he cooed, “I won’t leave you hanging.” The hum she gave in response quickly melted into a moan as he drug the thumb that rested on her clit in a circle, pressing just hard enough to have her forget whatever she was going to say. He spent a few more moments just touching her, figuring out just how sensitive she was, before teasing her with the tips of his middle and ring finger.
“Kei, look at me,” Dabi said, voice firm.
She did as he asked, the glassy look in her eyes, and the flush of her cheeks when he said her name pulled something tight in his chest. He loved that expression on her face, and it was made even better when he slid his fingers inside. A few experimental curls of his fingers and a shift in the angle of his hand had her rolling her hips into him.
“God, fuck Kei,” he groaned, “You feel so goddamn good.”
A small laugh left her, a smile pulling at her lips. “That’s funny,” she gasped, “I was just about to tell you the same thing.”
With a grin pulling at his own mouth, he moved his hand, curling his fingers against a new spot. It was a good spot, apparently. He could see her hands fisting the sheets at her sides, and the cant of her hips against his hand stuttered, then picked up.
“That feel good?” he teased lightly.
“So good,” Kei breathed.
A moment later he felt her hips slow, and almost stop against his hand. Dabi drew his brows together, and shook his head tsk-ing.
“What’d you stop for, doll?” Fingers hitting that same spot once again.
“I don’t,” she hummed, “Don’t want to come off as needy.”
Desperate was the word she didn’t say.
“I see, well,” he slowed his fingers, then stopped moving them all together. “I think I’ll just stop, then. At least,” he said, “until you start fucking yourself on my hand again.”
A brief look of confusion crossed Kei’s face, so he continued, “I want everything you can give me, that means I want your needy. I want your desperate. I want you to take what you need. I’ll give it to you, don’t think that’s what this is about, but I want you to know that it's yours. And,” he said, “I’m never going to complain about you participating, enthusiastically, in most anything. Sex especially.”
“So,” Dabi murmured, “What will it be? Am I going to stop, or, are you going to take what you need?”
The look she gave him was one of exasperated fondness, before she pulled him closer for a kiss. “I hate you, you know,” was her reply, as she rocked her hips against him once more.
He laughed, settling into a new rhythm.
“No,” he mused, “No you don’t.”
He didn’t know what he would do with himself if she did.
XXXX
Kei knew that she didn’t mean it when she said she hated him, far from it. The effort it was taking to make sure she didn’t just blurt it out was considerable. Especially as he took her clit in his mouth, while curling his fingers over and over against a spot that was making her see stars. It was too much, but she couldn’t tell him to stop, and she didn’t want him to. Not when she was so close.
The feel of him was the only thing she was focused on, and yet she couldn’t help but feel like he was so totally distracting. Kei couldn’t explain it, and she knew it made no sense. Any time she felt like she may have thought of a way to put it in words she lost the thought, wrecked by the drag of his fingers, or the utter sin that was his mouth.
Fuck he was so good with his mouth.
She had thought it as he kissed her, and again as he sucked on her chest, and she thought it again now as he ran his tongue over and around her clit, and inside her. She had only a second to register the loss of his fingers before he replaced them with his tongue. He broke away to take his fingers into his mouth, making a show of cleaning them off, and sucking them between his lips. A display that Kei was certain if she watched anyone else make, would look ridiculous.
He didn’t seem to care, and quickly resumed making good on his promise to fuck her with his tongue. After his earlier demonstration of what happens when she tries to hold back she just let herself move with him. If she got too far into her own head she would be embarrassed at how she was grinding her hips against his face, at the sounds that were leaving her mouth, the way she was gripping the sheets with one hand, the other tangled in his hair. Again, Dabi didn’t seem to care, at least not in the way she feared.
All of those things only seemed to egg him on, made him determined to keep her a panting, fucked out mess.
The pull of his mouth, coupled with the friction of his fingers were making it increasingly difficult for her to hold on. She wasn’t sure why she was trying to as she mumbled the word “Close,” once, then twice. He didn’t seem to catch it the first time, but as soon as he heard her he pulled back, just far enough to run the flat of his tongue up to her clit. Dabi slipped his fingers back inside, setting a pace that was the most blissful torture she had ever felt.
She must have said his name, or something coherent that caused him to take his mouth off of her. “I’ve got you, doll,” he muttered, pressing a kiss to her abdomen, “Let go for me.”
A moment later, with the tips of his fingers dragging against her, she did.
Kei struggled to breathe, tilting her head back against her mattress, and fighting not to smother him in her thighs. If he noticed, he didn’t let on. He just worked her through it, movements slow and thorough as he tasted her on his tongue.
When her mind finally cleared she tugged on his hair gently in an attempt to get him to stop lazily eating her out. It didn’t work.
“Dabi,”
Hearing his name earned her a muffled hum from between her legs before she could say more. “Dabi, please. Let me kiss you,” she pleaded. The vibration of his chuckle sent shockwaves bone deep as he pressed a kiss to her trembling inner thigh.
“Since you said please,”
“Oh thank you,” she said, stifling a laugh, rolling her eyes as he let the hand that was in his hair guide him up to her mouth. “I’m so glad I remembered my manners,”
“One of us needs to,” he chuckled, pressing a quick kiss to her lips. “It makes sense though, that it would be you since,” pausing for another kiss. “I,” a third, “clearly can’t be bothered to use my own.”
Kei was smiling. Dimple revealing, eye crinkling, leaves your face sore smiling. “I don’t know,” she mused, running a hand through his mussed hair, “I think you use them more than you notice.”
The smile he gave her in return, the happiness that seemed to leak from behind his eyes and from the upturned corners of his mouth, stole all the air left in her lungs. If it were the last thing she ever saw she wouldn’t mind.
“Only with you,”
“I’m honored.” The hand not in his hair came up to drag the back of her fingers against his face then rested on his cheek. What he did next, the way he turned into her hand, pressing a kiss to her open palm was so uncharacteristically soft.
“As you should be,” he said, lips brushing against her hand. “Now, I think I have a deal to make good on.”
Kei blinked at him, “Don’t you want me to-” she knew she shouldn’t hesitate to finish that sentence given everything about their current position, and where he just had his tongue, but she couldn’t help it, “-return the favor?”
“Do you want to?” he asked.
“Yes,” was her definitive answer. “I want to make you feel good.”
He laughed, “You think you haven’t been this entire time? Doll, you don’t need to put my cock in your mouth to make me feel good. Though, I don’t doubt it would feel fantastic. All of this has been just as good for me as it has you. And to be completely honest, if you put your mouth or hands anywhere near my dick right now I wouldn’t last long enough to fuck you, and believe it or not,” he moved, “My desire to fuck you like this currently outweighs my desire to have you suck me off.”
Well then.
That was certainly a reply. Not the one she was expecting, but a reply nonetheless. A small wave of disappointment washed over her, though it quickly disappeared as she told herself there would be time, they would have time. A sentiment he shared a moment later.
Dabi had left the bed to take his belt off saying “Don’t worry doll, you’ll get to have me in your mouth, just not right now.”
Kei was propped up on her elbows, watching him, taking note of how the muscles in his chest and arms flexed and bunched as he undid the button of his pants then pulled the zipper down. Fuck he was so attractive.
He paused, pulling her attention back up to his face. The smirk pulling at his lips had quite an effect on her, tightening her chest, stoking the fire in her veins.
“Like what you see?”
“I think the answer is pretty obvious, but,” she grinned, “If you aren’t convinced I can think of a few ways for you to make sure.”
“I have a few ideas myself,” Dabi said, hooking his thumbs under the waistband of his pants, making sure she noticed that they slid under his boxers as well. “Most of them involve making you watch me strip, then fucking you until you can’t think straight. Is that along the lines of what you were thinking?”
“Mm, no, I was thinking more along the lines of a polygraph test and-” she was cut off by a pillow to the face (how one had ended up on the floor at the foot of the bed she wasn’t sure). “What was that for?” she laughed, shoving the pillow off.
“Because I could,” he said with a wink.
He remembered. He remembered the last time they spoke all those years ago. “Now I’m the one climbing out of your window.”
“My, how times have changed,” she said quietly. “Now, will you please finish taking off your clothes and-”
“And fuck you?” he interrupted. “Gladly.”
XXXX
Dabi enjoyed watching Kei’s expression shift, eyes darkening as he pushed his pants down over his hips. Her eyes flicked up to his face as he stepped out and over the pile of clothes at his feet. He loved the way she looked at him. Like he was the only thing she saw, like he was everything she wanted.
“C’mere,” she muttered, sitting up so she could slip a hand into the hair at the base of his neck to pull him into a kiss as he crawled back over her. He wanted to be everything she wanted, and he had a feeling if he stuck around she could make him believe it. Hell, he was already halfway there.
Dabi was no stranger to fire, but the way he burned against her mouth, under her hands, in every fiber of his being as she bit his lip, pulled on his hair and slipped her tongue into his mouth. He moaned as she wrapped her legs around him, trying to get him closer without him being inside. Shit he wanted to be inside her so bad.
Bracing himself on one forearm he shifted. His free hand found itself back between her legs, teasing her for a moment before he pulled one of hers down. When he put her hand on his dick she pulled away from the kiss. “Do you want,” she gasped as he guided her hand up and down.
He had never seen Kei so disoriented, blinking hard (as if it would clear her head long enough for her to finish her sentence.) Still, it was almost funny to watch her try not to get carried away. He said almost because it was hard for him not to fall apart with each stroke of her hand, thumb swiping across the head to smear his precum up his length.
“Condom,” she finally choked out. “I have an IUD and I’m clean, but do you want one?”
It had been quite some time since Dabi had been tested, but it had been even longer since he had been with someone, so the chances of him not being safe were slim, but until he was sure he didn’t want to take that risk with her. Fighting the distraction of her hand he nodded.
“Drawer, bedside table to your right,” she told him.
He had to pull away to reach, but as soon as he had one in his hand and was leaning back over her she asked “Can I?”
She was going to kill him, but still, he agreed. To die because of her hands would be one way to go that he wouldn’t regret. “Yeah baby, you can.”
Dabi watched as she opened the wrapper, took the condom in her hands, then rolled it over him. A shudder ran through him at the feeling, and he pressed a kiss to her jaw, “That’s it, help line me up.”
As she shifted under him, guiding his hips, he for a moment wished he had never left home. If he hadn’t maybe they could have had this, had each other, sooner. Maybe she never would have had that shitty ex, maybe he wouldn’t have to sneak in and out of her apartment, maybe she wouldn’t have been hurt because of him. But, as he felt her gently press him against her, he didn’t care.
They found each other again, that’s all that matters.
The way it felt as he slid in had them both gasping. The grip in his hair and on his hip tightened as he pushed further. “So good,” he said, “Fuck you’re doing so good, taking me so well.”
The kiss that earned him made his stomach do backflips. She felt so good around him, and the feeling of her tightening around him was making his head spin. Once he was all the way in he broke the kiss, “Do you need a minute,” he heaved a breath, “I think I might, or do you want me to start moving?”
“Just need a minute,” she readjusted her hips, then settled, laughing, “I’m glad I’m not the only one.”
“You have no idea,” he sighed. A moment later he pressed a quick to her lips, “You good if I move?”
She nodded, pushing some of the hair that had fallen in his face to the side, “I’m good if you are.”
XXXX
Kei was more than good. She was great, wonderful, perfectly blissful. The fit, how he filled her up, the way he moved with her. She just wished he would stop holding back. He was trying so hard not to hurt her, to be mindful of her scrapes and bruises, that he didn’t realize she wanted more. Another slow drag of his hips and she couldn’t take it anymore.
“Dabi, you aren’t going to break me,” she said, holding the side of his face, making sure he saw her.
“Please,” she whispered, “I need more.”
She swore that he gave a sigh of relief, a soft smile on his face. As he pressed a kiss to the corner of her jaw he put a little more force behind his thrust. “Tell me if it’s too much,”
The way he shifted her hips as he pushed in again had her mind swimming in a haze of bliss. All she could manage beyond a moan in that moment was a quiet “Uh-huh,”
With every change in angle, every time he fucked her a little harder, every searing kiss had Kei melting. She was a mess, dragging her fingers down his back and between his shoulder blades. Dabi was trailing open mouthed kisses down the column of her throat, biting, licking, sucking. She loved the feel of him. Loved everything about him.
One of her hands fell to the mattress, right next to the hand he had fisted in the sheets by her head, palm flat to mattress. Without thinking, or noticing, she shifted her hand closer to his, almost reaching for him. Then she felt his pinky hook around hers. She almost told him then that she loved him, but she just kept repeating it in her mind. Over and over.
She had no idea that he was thinking the same thing.
XXXX
He almost felt guilty at the relief he felt when she asked him for more. Almost. But the way she moaned, the way she rolled her hips against his, quickly convinced him he shouldn’t feel guilty giving her what she wants.
The finger he had wrapped around hers was a silent way for him to tell her that he loved her. That he remembered it all. He would tell her with words later, he didn’t want to say something wrong and ruin everything.
Dabi rested his forehead against hers, listening to every sound she made, every word that passed through that pretty mouth, trying to commit it to memory. Both of them had long since lost the ability to speak clearly, taking praise in the form of incoherent mumbling and moans that filled the room.
She drug the hand between his shoulders down his back and over his hip, roaming over every inch she could reach. He wasn’t going to last much longer, and he had a feeling she was close too, if the way she was clenching around him was any indication.
“Fuck, Kei,” he breathed. “I’m gonna-”
She cut him off with a kiss, rocking her hips against him. “Me too,” she mumbled into his mouth. “Wanna cum with you.”
That almost ruined him. How he managed to hold on after that he had no clue, but he did. It was sloppy, and the pace he had set was now gone, replaced by a desperate attempt to get her to finish before he did. He lifted her hips a little higher, hit a little deeper, breathing heavy.
“There,” she gasped, “please.”
She didn’t have to tell him twice. He kept something like a rhythm, hitting that same spot over and over. Kei was tightening around him, trying to get him closer. One more thrust and she was gone.
The way she curled her pinky around his tighter, the feel of her nails digging into his back and the roll of her hips up into him had him spiraling. Dabi buried his face in her shoulder, falling apart as he pressed a kiss against her skin.
XXXX
For a moment they were quiet, simply basking in the feeling of each other. Then, he started to slowly, lazily press kisses to any skin he could immediately reach. Kei laughed at the feather light feeling, running a hand through his hair. She couldn’t remember a time when she felt so happy.
Their skin was stuck together with a layer of sweat, making a peeling sound as he pushed himself up. Kei missed the contact as he pulled out and moved to stand up. Sitting up to watch him she asked “What are you doing?”
“Don’t worry, I’ll be right back.”
He left the room and a moment later she heard a faucet run. The warm rag he returned with felt good on her skin as he helped her clean up. “Come on,” he said, scooping her up in his arms, “I don’t care if you take another shower or not, but I need you off the bed. Where do you keep your spare sheets?”
“Top shelf in the closet,” she told him, “You don’t have to do that though,”
The way he raised an eyebrow, looking at her like she had just insulted him almost made her laugh. “I know I don’t have to, brat, but I don’t exactly feel like sleeping on wet sheets. Do you?”
Kei smiled at him as he set her down on the bathroom counter. The smile faded as she hissed at the cold feeling under her thighs, but returned a second later as he kissed her.
“I don’t suppose I do, no,” she said, pressing a quick kiss in return to his lips. “Thank you,”
“You’re welcome,” he said, words laced with a snarky bite. “Now, shut up and stay here. I’ll come get you in a minute.”
“Okay.”
The bathroom was dark, which caused her to stub her toe on the corner of the cabinets as she made her way to use the toilet. The soreness in her legs didn’t help either, and she knew that if he saw her struggle to walk she would never hear the end of it. Thankfully she was able to finish her business, wash her hands and wipe her face and chest with a cool rag, and sit back up on the counter before he returned.
Now cuddled into his side with one of his arms around her shoulder, the other draped over her waist, Kei felt like she was finally at home. Sleep was beginning to take her, but not before she pressed a kiss to his chest. “You can crash here, if you want,” she said quietly.
She felt the vibrations of his laugh against her chest. “Thanks, doll,” was the last thing she remembered hearing before falling asleep.
When Kei rolled over the next morning she couldn’t help but smile. He was still there, asleep on his side, one hand behind his head, the other in the space between them. Dabi looked so peaceful when he slept, the sunlight that filtered through the blinds highlighting his face.
With the addition of light to the equation Kei could now see the scratches and bruises that she must have left last night on his shoulders, chest and back. Blinking several times and feeling a blush creeping on her face she turned away from him. She must have woken him up.
An arm reached out and wrapped itself around her waist, pulling her back into his chest. He propped his head on her shoulder, greeting her with a soft kiss against her neck. “G’morning doll,” he said, his voice thick with sleep.
Turning in his arms to face him she smiled, her previous embarrassment mostly forgotten. “Good morning,” she grinned, running a hand through his hair. And she meant it, it was a good morning. The best she had had in quite some time, even though she hadn’t done anything other than wake up next to him. After a moment, she let her hand slide down to rest on his cheek.
“I love you,” Kei whispered. She wasn’t sure what compelled her to say it right then, maybe it was the lazy smile that graced his features, or the comfort she took in knowing that he had stayed. Or maybe it was just because she really wanted to say it.
XXXX
Dabi blinked, wondering if his still sleep-addled brain was playing tricks on him.
“What did you say?” he said hoarsely.
She ran a thumb over his cheek, admiring him for a second before repeating what she had said.
“I love you,”
No, he had definitely heard correctly. Dabi smiled, a true, happy smile. He felt so many good feelings, most of which he didn't know what to call, flooding his system.
“I love you too,” he whispered.
XXXX
She loved his smile, so she made herself a promise. She would do whatever it took to make sure he kept smiling. Kei was sure it was one of the most beautiful things she had ever seen. Just like she was sure when he kissed her that the rotting vegetables in her kitchen could wait, just a little longer.
*losing a best friend is hard. having them show back up years later when they’re supposed to be dead? harder. what about when the feelings you had for each other start worming their way back up to the surface? shit, feelings are such complicated things.
*genre: angst, fluff if you squint, 18+, nsft,
*pairing: dabixfem!oc kei (the character is fem presenting w/fem anatomy, but other physical descriptors are vague so can be read as a fem!reader insert)
*this could be triggering to those who have experienced the above, its not overly graphic in its violence, it is explicitly spicy though so fic is under the cut*
XXXX
As Dabi stepped through the window into Kei’s apartment he felt rage bubbling under his skin. He looked around, half expecting her to come out of her room smiling, to tell him he could crash on the couch. She didn’t.
He had heard her voice on that video though. Kei wasn’t here, and if the call history on his phone meant anything, she hadn’t been for quite some time. It had almost been two weeks.
The sound of Hawks closing the window broke the silence, though neither said anything for a good while after. Both were doing their own mental inventory of the apartment, seeing what was out of place, what was the same. Very little was out of the ordinary, the apartment was tidy aside from the vegetables left out in the kitchen.
“How did they even find out that you knew Kei?” Hawks asked, picking up a knife from the kitchen floor.
“If I knew that they had known, we wouldn’t be in this situation bird brain.”
“Well, did you come here after you dealt with whatever his name was, the shark? They could have followed you.”
If looks could kill.
“Wow, I hadn’t thought of that,” Dabi said, sarcasm dripping from each word. “I did come here that night, but I was in pretty bad shape, I wasn’t even sure how I managed to get here, let alone if someone had followed me. I just,” this was the only place he could think of.
He was met with a sideways glance, and an expression that said something Hawks put into words shortly after. “That doesn’t sound like someone using another person because it’s convenient. You obviously care about her. But how deep does it go?”
Dabi gave him a stony glare.
“Fine. Don’t say anything. But sooner or later you’ll have to face it, whether you say it out loud or keep it to yourself.” The look the hero gave him was hesitant, but he continued. “When we get her back you can’t really expect that everything will be the same. Whatever this situation the two of you are in can’t last the way it is now.”
Irritation bubbled in his throat, “What are you getting at here?” Hawks opened his mouth to say something, but Dabi cut him off, “You know what, this isn’t important. Just drop it.”
“Yes!” Hawks shouted, “Yes it is! How you feel about her is important because if she’s just convenient for you, and you’re a much better actor than what I give you credit for, you need to leave her alone when this is done. It will just end up getting both of you killed, and I can’t sit by and let that happen to her. But,” the other man took a deep breath, “if what I see is right, and you do care, you need to do something about it. And preferably figure out a way to keep her safe if you’re going to stick around.”
Dabi kept moving around the apartment looking for something he wouldn't find, mostly because he really wasn’t looking for anything. He just wanted Hawks to stop talking, but he kept going. Each word dug its way under his scarred flesh, hooking into his bones. He reached for a book on her shelf, half ready to pull it off and chuck it at the winged hero. Once in his hands it opened, the way that books do when something is stuck between pages. Without effort, as if there were no other way for it to be, like this exact page was always meant to be exposed. His fingers brushed along the back of what was stuck before picking it up and turning it over.
It was a photo of Kei in middle school, a wide toothy grin plastered on her face and her arm slung around his shoulder. He hardly recognized himself, white hair, skin that wasn’t scarred, smiling. He was happy, even if it was just in the moment the picture had been taken. He remembered that day, it was the last birthday he had celebrated. Kei had managed to get permission to take him out for a few hours that day. She filled it with his favorite things, and got him away from his family, she made him feel seen. Understood.
Hawks was quiet now, standing next to him looking at the photo in his hands. “Whoever you were to each other before, whatever happened then, it doesn’t matter.”
“It does,” Dabi snapped. “It does matter. It matters because she knew me before I became this, she cared about me before I became this, and I left her behind. Then we found each other again that night on the roof and she looked at me and she knew who I was. She recognized me, and she knew what I had made myself into, but she still offered to patch me up. To let me stay. She got to know me again, she still cared. And god damnit she made me fall in love with her all over again and I hate her for it.”
He gave a dry laugh and continued, “I mean, I don’t hate her, not really. How could I? But it pisses me off because I don’t want it. I don’t want to care, I don’t want to feel things, or at least I thought I didn’t. But every night I came here and she made me want things that I had given up on years ago. Things I thought I could never have. And now I’m going to burn whoever took her from me until there is nothing left. If she doesn’t want anything to do with me, fine. But if she still wants me around then she’s going to have one hell of a time getting rid of me.”
XXXX
Once he was back at the bar that served as a base for the League he sat down and nearly shattered the glass Kurogiri handed him. He was quiet except for the muttered curses he let out when Hawks told him that he didn’t find anything about where she may be. They couldn’t track her phone's location since it was still in her apartment and the number that called him was proving to be more difficult to find.
“What’s got you in such a pissy mood?” Shigaraki asked after Dabi nearly sent his phone flying at the wall.
He glared at the walking patch of dry skin but someone else quickly drew his ire.
“Aw,” Toga cooed, “Did Kei finally get a boyfriend and say you can’t stay with her anymore?”
“Shut the hell up,” he snapped.
The League eventually found out about Kei, no matter how good he was at keeping secrets he could only disappear every night without someone following him and figuring it out. After his talk with Hawks, Dabi had no qualms being honest about what he wanted, and he felt little to no shame over the fact that the idea of Kei having a boyfriend, that wasn’t him, made him bristle.
A petty, inconsequential thought given the current circumstances, but it was something to note. Toga took the hint and dropped it. Twice coaxed what was going on out of him over another glass of whiskey, though he left out certain details. Then, they waited. For hours.
It wasn’t until the very early hours of the next morning that his phone buzzed, but it wasn’t anything useful. The pictures of Kei, bloody and bruised, made him feel like he was going to burst into flames. He nearly threw his phone at the wall, but Twice stopped him short. How else were they going to find anything else out?
XXXX
Once they had their pictures they left her alone. She shrank back into her corner and felt her bones itch with the inability to move around. She couldn’t even walk around the room they had her in, not with the cuffs being chained to the wall. Every once and a while she could feel the cuffs change temperature, but they never hurt for too long.
In those hours alone Kei tried to figure a way out, but her mind was blank. Without being able to get out of her chains, she was stuck. She couldn’t pull them from their anchors in the wall, and even still she couldn’t hop her way to freedom. She wouldn’t be able to fight her way past First and the others. There were too many of them, and she had a feeling her knowledge quirk wouldn’t do much against their brute strength.
One would think that given her past she would have been more inclined to read about how to get out of situations like this, but she hadn’t. Never in a million years would she have thought she would find herself in this position. She would have to fix that if she ever got home. A book on lockpicking and a set of picks would be the first things on her list, right after an ice pack, heating pad, and some burn cream.
The light pouring through the window brought with it a change in her bindings temperatures. The increase in heat drug her from her thoughts of escape. Taking her lower lip between her teeth she bit. She wasn’t going to give them the satisfaction of hearing her scream. As the temperature rose she closed her eyes, forcing herself to focus on keeping her breathing level.
A pair of calloused fingers grabbed her chin, forcing her to lift her head. When they had entered the room she wasn’t sure. She couldn’t see the camera, but the jeering comments from the men around her telling them to get closer with it made it clear they had it.
“Come on girl, let’s hear it,” one man demanded.
She didn’t know if it was courage or sheer idiocy that drove her to spit out the words “You fucking wish,” but as the temperature spiked, Kei decided it was the latter, taking her cheek between her teeth. The Kei of eight months ago wouldn’t have dared to do something so reckless. But Dabi encouraged her to say what she was thinking, regardless of what it was, and she had no energy for niceties.
Eventually Kei couldn’t take it anymore, the metallic taste of blood coating her tongue. Strangled cries made their way up from her vocal cords, fighting to be heard, but they never made it past her lips. Tears rolled down her cheeks as she leaned her head back against the wall.
The minutes felt like hours as she cried, the laughter of her captors ringing in her ears. When they were done there was no relief. Her skin burned, and she wanted to rip it all off. She wanted to go home. She wanted to feel better. She wanted to be safe. She wanted to hear the creak of the couch as Dabi laid down, even if he never stayed until she woke up. She wondered when, or if, she would see him again.
XXXX
Twice told Dabi that if he had a dollar for every time he had to stop him from breaking his phone in the past week, or his hand against the wall for that matter, he would be rich.
Dabi wasn’t eating, and the sleep he got was far from restful. The anticipation of what message he would get next was eating him up. He and Hawks were running into one dead end after another trying to find these people and where they were keeping Kei. When they tried to find the number that was sending the messages, the computer they were using would crash, virus after virus infecting the PC.
Hawks was trying to get any camera footage from Kei’s apartment building and nearby streets, but given the part of town it was in, more of them didn’t work than did. Not to mention there had been an outage in the area around the same time she had stopped replying to the winged hero. Picture after picture, video after video of Kei bleeding and bruised and they never gave any conditions. No demands. Nothing.
Dabi was going out of his goddamn mind.
There was only one thing that would make him feel better. Well, maybe two. Knowing that Kei was safe, preferably with him. And roasting the people who had taken her alive.
When the call finally came he answered without a second thought. Hawks watched intently as Dabi stood. “Let’s cut the shit. What do you want?”
XXXX
Kei watched and listened as First took the phone from Wheezy. They were still in the same room as her, but were far enough away that she had to really try to hear them. Catching bits and pieces of what was said she felt her stomach drop. If Dabi did this, he would be as good as dead. She couldn’t believe that he would agree, he knew better. He wouldn’t.
But, when First hung up and threw her over his shoulder she knew. He was going to do it. He was going to do it and there was nothing that Kei could do about it.
The ride to the dropoff was long, and she spent it cramped into the back of a van with five very large men, none of which smelled very good. Though Kei doubted she smelled like a bed of roses herself. The “showers” she had been able to take were not very thorough. Not to mention her clothes were filthy and covered in blood.
Her main concern was what on earth she was going to do when they stopped. She couldn’t let this happen, she wouldn’t. At least she wanted to tell herself that, but she couldn’t fight, her quirk wouldn’t help. If anything she would just get in the way if she tried to do something. She hated this. All of it.
As the van came to a stop behind what she heard the men describe as an old group of warehouses the two men up front got out and opened the back. The death grip her anxiety had on her chest tightened as they pulled her out. She hoped, wished, prayed to whatever god there may be that he wouldn’t be there. She had no plan, no way to stop this, no way to help.
Both feet on the ground now her view of the open space in front of the warehouse was blocked by the van door. But, if the man kneeling in front of her to undo the chains around her ankles was any indication, Kei could assume he was there. Worry and fear clawed at her mind as the shackles on her wrists came undone. What was he thinking, coming here alone? Nevermind that he might be able to set this whole complex on fire in the blink of an eye, First could seriously hurt him. Make it harder for Dabi to fight, not to mention she had little knowledge on what other quirks were among the other men.
Someone took her by the arm and towed her around the van, situating her smack in the middle of their circle. She couldn’t see him, or anything really for that matter, but soon enough he spoke.
“I’m here. Alone, and ready to give myself over, just like you asked. I even put on those stupid quirk supressing cuffs you sent me,” he said, shaking his wrists, “Now, let her go.” There was something in his tone that threw Kei for a loop. He was smug. Taunting, even. Kei couldn’t tell if her captors picked up on it, but she knew it was there. He wasn’t trying to hide it, or the thinly concealed rage simmering just under the surface.
They must not have noticed because the men standing in front of her stepped aside, letting her through. First grabbed her by the arm before she could move, saying “You have two minutes before he’s ours.”
Kei just nodded and made her way to Dabi as fast as her shaky legs would take her. The traitorous limbs in question gave out just as she met him. He caught her, and to her surprise wrapped his arms around her. Dabi buried his head in the crook of her neck, breath fanning over her skin, sending shivers down her spine. All Kei could do was wrap her arms around his waist in response as tears pricked her eyes. One by one they fell, leaving tracks in the dirt that dusted her face.
“I’m so sorry,” she whispered, “I don’t know what I can do to stop this, I don’t know if I can help you. First, the big man in the blue jacket, he can control metal, make more or less, mess with the temperature. He’ll hurt you, they will hurt you and there’s nothing I can do. I’m sorry,”
“What’s this, doll face? Are you worried about me?”
“Of course I am,” she choked out, a small worried smile tugging at the corners of her mouth.
He gave her a wink, then let his face fall, showing that same mix of emotions that were laced in his voice just a moment ago. “Don’t be,” he said, voice hard as stone, “I may be desperate, but I’m not stupid. I have a plan. They should be here any minute now.”
Wiping at her face Kei wondered what he meant when a hole rimmed with black and purple smoke appeared in the air behind them. She squeezed her eyes shut, then opened them again to make sure what she saw wasn't a hallucination. Inside the hole was the furnishings of a bar and several people, all of whom she recognized from the news stepped out.
As Dabi dropped the cuffs from his wrists a familiar blur of red and tan slammed onto the ground next to them. The winged hero caught her glance and grinned.
“It’s a long story,” both men said at the same time as she looked from one to the other.
A smug grin pulled at Dabi’s mouth, that only grew as she looked around him. Using his hands to guide her behind him they ghosted over hers for a moment before helping her take fistfuls of his coat. “Stay behind me, and don’t let go, Kei. This won’t take long.”
Doing as she was told she pressed herself into his back, all the while her heart was doing somersaults. He had a plan, he was never going to hand himself over, and he had called her by her name. She could replay that sound and never get tired of it. The nicknames were special, and she loved them, but the way her name rolled off his tongue was something else.
Kei could feel the heat from Dabi’s flames, she could feel the wind from Hawks wings. The shouts and screams echoed on the empty lot, but like he had said, the fight was over before she knew it. One of his hands, still hot, hovered over hers, as he craned his head back to tell her she could come out now. She kept one hand balled up in his coat as she stepped around to his side. He didn’t seem to mind, slipping an arm over her shoulders and pulling her in closer.
“Are they…” Kei began to ask, voice uncertain.
“No doll, they aren’t. That was one condition to getting the bird's help. But they’re close enough to it that they won’t think about coming after you again. Not to mention that the cops will undoubtedly be here any moment to collect them.”
Kei just nodded, still trying not to fall over, and wrap her head around everything that’s going on. She leaned into him, tightening her arm around his back. If he wasn’t holding onto her just as tightly she was convinced she would collapse.
By now though, his friends had gathered around. The girl, Toga if she remembered correctly, squealed. “Oooh! Dabi, she's even cuter than I thought she would be!” The girl grabbed Kei’s unoccupied hand, surprisingly taking into account the burns on her wrists. “We should totally hang out!”
Dabi batted the younger girl's hand away. “That’s enough Toga. I need to take Kei home. Kurogiri?”
A hole like the one Kei saw before opened beside them, only this time it was inside her apartment. She let Dabi lead her halfway through before she turned and said an awkward “Thank you,” to the crew of villains behind her. Making eye contact with Hawks she gave him a small smile.
“I’ll talk to you tomorrow, little bird. Get some rest,” Hawks said quietly.
Kei nodded, then let Dabi pull her the rest of the way through the portal. When it closed behind them, she was back in her apartment. Relief washed over her like a flood, and she let go of Dabi’s coat, placing her face in her hands, rubbing gently. It had felt like a lifetime since she had been home.
The feeling of his hand lazily running up and down her back made her want to melt into his touch. So that’s what she did. Letting him pull her into his chest, sighing in content when he rested his head on hers.
They stayed like that for, Kei didn’t know how long, but she was the first to pull away. As good as it felt, as much as it made her feel at ease, she was gross. And her close proximity to him made her acutely aware of that fact, not that he was giving any indication that it was bothering him. Not to mention she needed to take care of her burns and bruises. She gave him a small smile as he tried to keep her tucked into him. Studying his face she lifted a hand to run a thumb over a scarred cheek.
“Thank you,” she said softly, “for everything.”
“You don’t have to thank me, I mean it.”
Her lips twitched, a brief smile. “Still, I wanted to say it. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go shower.”
XXXX
He gave a small pout, then let her go. Only after she had left his grasp and locked herself in the bathroom did he release the harsh breath he felt like he’d been holding for days. He could only imagine how she felt. The relief he felt, at seeing her again, being able to hold her, knowing she was safe was the thought at the front of his mind. A small part of him wanted to flirt, make some kind of pass at her, but the reasonable part of himself thought better of it. She needed time, and rest. What he wanted to tell her could wait.
*Losing a best friend is hard. Having them show back up years later when they're supposed to be dead? Harder. What about when the feelings you had for each other start worming their way back up to the surface? Shit, feelings are such complicated things.
*Genre: angst, fluff if you squint, 18+, nsft,
*Pairing: Dabixfem!OC Kei (the character is fem presenting w/fem anatomy, but other physical descriptors are vague so can be read as a fem!reader insert)
*this could be triggering to those who have experienced the above, its not overly graphic in its violence, it is explicitly spicy though so fic is under the cut*
He was gone for a week after that, and when he made his way back through her window he was dripping blood. He gave her a tired nod before dropping to his knees. She dropped the dish she was washing and ran, sliding on the knees of her pants until she was next to him. He sagged and fell on her, his head colliding with her collarbone.
He was burning up, so much so that it hurt to touch him. She had to cool him off. Shifting so she could loop his arm over her shoulder as she stood she heard him mumble something incoherent.
“Just stay with me, okay?”
Another mumble. At least it was something. She got him to the bathroom and sat him on the edge of the tub. “We need to get you out of these clothes,” she had said we, but he could hardly move. So, as gently as she could without losing more time, she took his coat and shirt off followed by his boots and his pants. Once he was just in his boxers she shifted him into the tub and turned on the shower with cool water.
As soon as it hit his skin it evaporated turning to steam. What was she going to do? The answer was wait, she knew it, but she hated it. Watching his slow, heavy breathing was driving her mad. She had to distract herself. So, she started reciting poems.
They were arguably one of the easiest things for her to memorize with her quirk and remember quickly. Any book she touched she could memorize, she didn’t even have to open it. Running through whatever came to mind she kept her eyes on the man in her shower. Slowly, the water began to bead on his skin and in his hair, dripping instead of disappearing. His breathing evened out and he furrowed his brows.
He jumped once he opened his eyes, breathing rapidly, looking around but not quite seeing. He must not have recognized where he was.
“Hey,” she called, he didn’t seem to hear her. “Hey, it’s me. Kei, remember?” Moving onto her knees she reached out and gently touched his shoulder. “It’s just me. Look at me, look. You’re safe.”
“You’re safe,” she repeated.
That brought him back. He finally seemed like he could understand what he was seeing and hearing, focusing on her face as he fought with his breathing. She sat with him until he relaxed. Then, she helped him out of the tub and onto her counter to finally patch him up.
He was quiet barring a few hisses when something hurt. Once she was done she handed him two towels and helped him back to his feet. He wrapped one around his waist and the other over his hair, then, as she went to her room to get clothes for him he followed.
Dabi simply sat on her bed as she dug into the box of clothes that she no longer bothered putting in her closet. She would never tell him, but she had gone so far as to restock the box with new clothes since he so frequently needed them. Pulling out a pair of sweats and a tee-shirt she handed them to him along with an unopened pack of boxers her dad gave her in a strange game of pass along.
He gave her a strange look but she just sighed and told him it was a long story. With the bundle of clothes in his arms he walked with her back to the bathroom to change. She left him to it so that she could clean up the blood from her floors. Kei was just finishing up as he slowly made his way to the couch. Once that was done she combed through her kitchen to scrounge up something for him to eat.
All she had was the leftovers from last night's stir fry. It would have to do.
She set the bowl and a glass of water down on the coffee table in front of him. He was still being quiet, almost unnaturally so. Unsure of what to do she was just going to give him space to rest, but much like the second time he came to her, he grabbed her hand. He gently tugged, pulling her onto the couch beside him, much closer than she had expected.
Dabi didn’t seem to mind. In fact he leaned into her, making short work of any space that was between them. Kei let him, and leaned into him as well, welcoming it when he rested his head on her shoulder. He squeezed her hand tight and didn’t let go.
*
Dabi knew he shouldn’t be doing this. That he shouldn’t be coming back to her night after night, or holding her. There was a reason he hadn’t shown up for a week. What had happened the last time he was with her shouldn’t have happened. She shouldn’t trust him at all. Let alone enough to tell him that.
Moreso, he shouldn’t have let himself touch her. But god damn it he was a selfish bastard, and just a little stupid when it comes to her. When his head was spinning and he was drunk on pain the only place he could remember how to get to was her. He didn’t know how he got here or how he got up the fire escape. He should be dead in a back alley somewhere.
But here he was.
Safe.
With her.
And he didn’t want to be anywhere else.
“Doll?” he murmured. She turned her head to look down at his face as he felt her hum in response. “Talk to me.”
If he bothered to move his head to look at her he would have seen her quirk a brow before she asked “About what?”
Everything was what he wanted to say. He wanted her to tell him everything that happened after he left. Every minute detail. He would gladly sit and listen, and would sit and stew in everything it made him feel. Dabi didn’t regret much in his life, nor did he ever think he would, but she was the exception.
He regretted leaving her behind. So much so it hurt.
“Anything.” was his simple answer.
She shifted, then spoke. The vibration of her voice felt as if it was sinking into his bones, settling with a weight that was strange but comforting. He wanted to listen to her talk all night. Eventually she trailed off after telling him some of her stories from work and things were quiet.
Dabi almost thought she had fallen asleep. He was surprised when she spoke back up.
“Hey,” she said, her voice soft. “Can I ask you a question?”
Lifting his head from its resting place on her shoulder he moved to be able to see her face. “That depends, what do you want to know?”
“Why do you do all this?”
He frowned, which prompted her to continue.
“I guess, I just want to try to understand. You go through so much, and you get hurt, and quite literally burn yourself up inside. Why? I mean, will it be worth it? You don’t have to tell me, but I’m just trying to figure you out.”
The surprise he felt must have shown on his face because Kei immediately started to backtrack, telling him that he didn’t have to answer and that it was a silly question. She was rambling at this point.
Despite feeling some type of way about the question she had posed he had to fight the urge to smile. When they were kids she would lose any and all ability to put a stopper on her thoughts when she got tired. It led to some of the funniest shit he had ever heard, and some of the deeper conversations they had.
“Doll-” he reached out and tugged on her chin so that she was looking at him- “stop talking for a minute and I’ll tell you.”
She blinked a few times then shut her mouth. Her eyes flicked down to where his hand was still holding her face then back up to his eyes. Dabi swiped a thumb across her lower lip before dropping his hand to his lap. “Good girl.”
He watched as she processed what he had just said, her eyes going wide as she fidgeted. She cleared her throat as she toyed with her fingers, unable to look at him. When she finally looked somewhere other than the floor, she had a hard time looking anywhere but his lips. Dabi could see her struggle to look him in the eye, but in those moments she did there was an intense curiosity in her gaze. He filed this information away. What for he wasn’t sure, but it seemed important.
“It’s simple really,” he said, breaking the tension that was strung between them as he pulled out of her space. “To see the end of so-called heroes. I would be lying if I said revenge wasn’t a factor too.” She stayed quiet, so he continued “They’re hypocrites and liars the lot of them, and they don’t deserve the title. In public they’re just, and righteous, preaching about doing what's right, but behind closed doors they do what they want, they’ll throw you out and cast you aside as soon as you aren’t useful to them. They’re just as bad, if not worse than the rest of us.”
With that he expected a rebuttal, some fight. She knew he had been obsessed with being a hero as a child, if only to please his father, but all she did was nod thoughtfully. There was a tinge of sadness in how she looked at him, but no pity.
“Do you think there’s anything worth saving?” She paused, “Or should it all be burnt to the ground?”
“I say burn it all.”
XXXX
From that night on, they filled the quiet with questions. He asked her about why she was a doctor, what school was like and what things were like for her. Sometimes he asked her questions that sounded too much like her old friend. What did she like to read? What music did she listen to? What was her favorite color, was it still green? It was, and she liked to read fantasy books, and she listened to anything she could get her hands on.
She asked him what should be the simple things, what makes him happy, what does he do when he isn’t working, how his days are. There are days the answers come easier than others, and there are days when the questions come as distractions from whatever she has to do to keep him alive and kicking.
There was laughter in what Kei was starting to realize an apartment that was entirely too large for just one person. It felt fuller, more like a home when he was there, leaving a human sized indent in her couch. Something that terrified her to think, and that she would never say out loud.
He was still crude and refused to call her by her name, but she found herself waiting up for him most nights. When he didn’t show there was an ache in her chest that often didn’t go away til morning. The worry that settled in her bones was persistent. It was hard not to assume the worst.
It reminded her of the last year of middle school, only worse, and it wasn’t his father she wanted to protect him from. Her thoughts were drowning in memories from their past any time she was idle. At the hospital, at the store, at home. Lying beneath the covers she thought of the last time they had spoken, before all of this happened.
XXXX
He had snuck her into his room, a common occurrence in their day to day lives. It was to study, though the occasional joke would be made, and whenever the two of them were together laughter was unavoidable. Exams were soon, and while she helped him with math, he would help her with English. There was a lull in conversation as they each worked on their own problems, at least that’s what Kei thought he was doing. Imagine her surprise when a pillow smacked her full across the face.
“What was that for?” she whisper yelled, not wanting to let anyone else know she was in his room.
“Cause I could,” was the reply she got, along with a wink.
Kei rolled her eyes and hoped the blush that was creeping up her cheeks wasn’t that noticeable. “Focus. You won’t get into that hero school of yours if you fail your math exam.”
His father may have thought him weak in terms of quirk and constitution, but she knew better. Anything he set his mind to he could do. He would prove everyone who doubted him wrong.
However, none of that stopped him from being a cocky bastard.
“You’re assuming they won’t let me in on recommendation alo-” he was cut off with a pillow upside the head.
Next thing she knew, they were in an all out pillow war, which from their sitting positions was easier said than done. Kei couldn’t help her laughter. It mixed with his as their notebooks clattered to the floor, the notion of studying long forgotten.
She didn’t know how it happened. When the laughter stopped. How the pillows found their way to the floor. How he was suddenly leaning in, closer, closer, closer. Her heart was in her throat as he was scant inches away from her face. She couldn’t decide where to look, his half lidded eyes, his lips or somewhere completely different. Finally she settled on closing them just as someone downstairs slammed the front door shut.
They jumped apart as his father called for him. Scrambling to gather her things Kei could feel the heat radiating from her blush. Shoving all but the notes she had made for him in her bag she made her way to the open window.
“Your notes are on the bed, I’ll see you after exams!”
Extending her pinky out to him while she was half out the window, she hooked them together when he got close enough.
“Now, go! Before he gets mad.”
She was almost over the fence, back into her own yard when he called her name.
“What is it?”
“Thanks, for everything.” He winked again before disappearing into his room yelling back at his father.
And that was it. That was the last time they spoke. He didn’t disappear until months later, but as soon as exams were over he wouldn’t speak to her, he didn’t sneak over, not so much as a glance in her direction. It drove her mad, and she spent hours up in her room wondering if she did something wrong. Had he not meant to almost kiss her?
Weren’t they best friends anymore?
She got her answer four weeks into high school. They came home from opposite directions now, him having gotten into his hero school, and her going to a new kind of school to fast track into certain professions. When she saw him disappointment sank into her, bone-deep. There he was, hand in hand with a girl she didn’t recognize.
It made sense in a way. They went to the same school, which meant she probably had an amazing quirk. One that his father would approve of, so he could take her home openly and not have to sneak her around like contraband snacks at the movie theater.
Why it came at the cost of her friendship completely, she wasn’t sure. It probably had more to do with his father than anything else, but Touya wasn’t the kind to entertain people he didn’t at least like. It hurt. But the more she thought about it the more she came to realize she would have hated being around them almost as much as she hated not having him around any more.
She missed him though.
XXXX
Staring at her ceiling Kei blinked away tears that had pooled in her eyes. She thought it didn’t hurt as bad any more, it had been years and she thought she had made her peace with it. The wound was ripped open the night he found her on the roof. She had to heal it all over again.
What they had now would either be the best medicine or the worst poison.
As the hours ticked by she found her thoughts consumed, and no matter how much she tossed and turned, how hard she rubbed her eyes she couldn’t shake it. The small red flames of her old feelings were changing, if they hadn't completely already. Strange new blue flames danced across the walls of her heart. It terrified her.
She didn’t know what to do. It was the strangest mix of nerves and serenity that flooded her senses when he was around. The ache when he was gone was something fierce. Her heart raced when he called for her, even if it was just one of his nicknames. She loved them.
The weight in her chest when he came to her battered and bruised was almost unbearable compared to the nights he came to her in one piece. Either way, it gave her hope she shouldn’t have. It didn’t mean anything, she was just there, a convenient option.
Still, she couldn’t sleep if she didn’t know that he was out in her living room, all fixed up, and asleep on her couch. The treacherous part of her mind wondered what it would be like to kiss him in the moments he was close.
It was almost too much.
Almost.
XXXX
Dabi wasn’t always himself around Kei. Or maybe he was, and the definition of who he was was changing in each hour he spent with her. He wouldn’t say it out loud though. He wouldn’t give voice to what was to him, his most selfish desires. To be honest about why he came to her instead of the League.
He came to her out of convenience and convenience alone, that’s what he told himself. It was easier than patching himself up, and hospitals were out of the question, so having a doctor at his disposal was good. He knew that Kei wouldn’t turn him in. Not to mention her couch was better than his shitty mattress back with the League.
He wouldn’t admit that he liked that the pillows smelled like her. That he felt his crooked heart stop every time she looked at him, be it with worry, or the occasional something else. The words “I’m not going to lose her again,” had crossed his mind but they would never cross his lips. He would never admit he wondered what it would be like to press his lips to hers. That he wanted to be with her, completely. He would never say that knowing that she was just a few steps away gave him peace. A feeling he didn’t deserve, but within the walls of her apartment he was free to feel it.
She gave that to him. Gave him so much he didn’t know what to do with it, and she did it without a second thought. It fed into the lie that he told himself, that he was just using her. The part of his mind that he now deemed heretical pointed out that if that was what he was doing there was no need to get to know her again. To do so many of the things he found himself doing. She would let him stay without a word, the first night all those months ago proved as much. He told that part of his mind to fuck off, though it was getting harder to ignore.
XXXX
It was only on rare occasions that Kei decided to cook. Most of the time she either ordered out or didn’t eat at all, a habit Hawks was fighting desperately for her to break. In fact the only reason she was cooking tonight was because he was coming over for dinner and she didn’t want to argue over why the only thing in her fridge was take out boxes. Besides, it was her day off, so she had time to go to the store and cook.
She felt a little uneasy, Dabi hadn’t been around in over a week. He hadn’t said anything, but she didn’t expect him to. It had gotten to a point though that him being away for more than a few days was unusual.
She was chopping vegetables when the familiar grate of the window sliding open met her ears. However, instead of feeling relief, she felt anxiety bubble up in her chest. It wasn’t even afternoon yet. He never came over at this time of day.
Looking over her shoulder caused Kei to drop the knife in her hand. It wasn’t Dabi. In fact, it was several people who were not Dabi stepping through her window.
Scrambling, she turned back around to grab the knife. When the sensitive palm of her hand wrapped around the handle she let go. Why was it hot? Thinking at a million miles a minute, she thought to grab the nearby towel to wrap around the blade, but she was still too slow. An arm wrapped around her waist and something covered her face.
Writhing in her captor's grasp did no good. It was like being trapped between iron clamps. She couldn’t place the smell filling her nose but she knew it wasn’t good. Everything was going dark as she felt someone hoist her onto their shoulder, then, nothing.
When she finally opened her eyes again she didn’t recognize where she was. That was no surprise, however the chains on each wrist and ankle were not something she anticipated. Each cuff was attached to a decent length of heavy metal that was anchored to the wall. Looking around she found that she was alone, so she drew her legs up and wrapped her arms over her knees and settled in to wait.
After a time the heavy door on the other side of the room was forced open. One of the men from her apartment stepped inside and gave her a grin that made her skin crawl.
“Look at who finally woke up,” he cooed. Stooping in front of her he took her chin in his gloved hands, “Let’s get this party started, shall we?”
XXXX
Dabi was with the League. The mission they had sent him on had taken longer than he wanted, but he wasn’t going to half-ass it. What he hated was that they weren’t letting him leave. He had been gone just a little over two weeks, but he had been back for three days and he would be lying if the fact that he hadn’t seen Kei yet was souring his mood. He didn’t have a phone with him while he was gone, but even if he did he wouldn’t have been able to talk to her, it was too much of a risk.
Still, it would have been nice to have something else to make the time pass quicker. He swirled the drink in his glass, swiping at his screen to hang up on an incoming call from another restricted number. He seemed to be getting more and more of them as the days went by. They never left a message either, so he just figured it was some sort of scam.
He was finally able to get out of the bar after another three days. Some sort of punishment for taking so long. It was late as he made his way into the abandoned warehouse where he was supposed to be meeting the stupid bird.
His steps were quiet, which he thinks is the only reason he was able to hear Hawks talking to himself. A few steps closer and he realized that the other man was actually on the phone.
“Hey, it’s me again,” Dabi watched as Hawks ran a hand through his hair. “I’m getting really worried, give me a call when you can.”
Raising a brow he spoke letting his presence be known, “What’s the matter, someone not picking up?”
That got him a withering glare before the pro looked away. “Let’s just get this over with.”
Their business was done in a matter of minutes, just checking in to see how things were going. Neither liked to linger, Dabi almost more than Hawks, so he was quick to walk away. He was halfway across the room when he felt the buzz of his phone in his pocket.
“Fucking, again?” Seeing the word restricted flash across his screen was enough to make him instinctively start to swipe to hang up, but he was pissed. He wanted to know who wouldn’t leave him the fuck alone.
Answering the call he stopped in his tracks, giving a harsh “What do you want,” as a greeting.
“Ah,” an unknown voice started, “So he does know how to answer the phone. And here I was thinking I’d have to resort to, well, nevermind that.”
“I’m not asking again, what do you want?”
“Well, little one? What do I want?” There was the heavy clank of metal and a sharp exhale. “Now now, don’t keep him waiting. I know you like to be difficult, but be a dear just this once and do as you’re told.”
It sounded like someone spat on the ground and Dabi was beginning to lose what little patience he had left. “Fine, if you won’t speak we’ll just have to show him, won’t we?” There was a rustling sound and then Dabi heard faint voices on the other end of the line. “Give me a moment then all of this will make sense. Ta-ta now.”
The line went dead and he wanted to chuck his phone across the room. What the hell was this person on? What a waste of time.
XXXX
Kei watched as First, the name she had given the man who had first entered her makeshift cell, hung up the phone. She had no doubt made things harder for herself, but whatever they wanted with Dabi couldn’t be good, and she wasn’t going to play the bait so willingly. It had been nearly a week and she had managed to keep her mouth shut for this long. Why start talking now?
Dirt crunched under heavy boots as First handed the phone to the man she called Wheezy (he always had a cigarette hanging from his mouth) and instructed him to stay quiet but keep the phone up. First stood in front of the phone and said a few things that she didn’t pay attention to. He was probably explaining why they took her, without saying they had her, then he would reveal her for dramatic effect. She took that time to pick something to think about during whatever happened next. She settled on recalling as much of her knowledge from school as she could. List the elements, as many medication names as she could think of, or different proteins and their functions.
She kept her eyes on First’s back as she curled in on herself, drawing her legs up to her chest. He turned, still blocking her from the camera’s view. Looking down at her he made one last attempt to do this nicely.
“Come on, just look at the camera and say something. Just tell us your name, yeah?”
She inhaled sharply through her nose and looked away. That was the wrong answer. Suddenly the chains connected to her wrists were much shorter and her arms were pinned to the wall. Taking measured breaths Kei fought to keep her mouth shut as the cuffs went red hot.
“Go to hell,” she spat.
“You have a voice after all,” First said, moving to face Wheezy who handed the phone back to him. They had gotten what they needed from her, at least for the moment. She couldn’t do anything now.
XXXX
Dabi hadn’t moved since the call had ended. Not because he was actually waiting for whatever they were supposedly going to be sending him to tell him what they wanted but because the whole thing had irritated him to no end. He needed to cool off, but when he felt the phone in his hand vibrate, any progress he had made toward that goal went out the window.
It was a text this time that simply read “Hope this explains. Be in touch soon.”
There was a video attached. Without thinking he opened it. The man from the call spoke, only now there was a face to the voice. He looked just as sleazy as he sounded.
“Hello again, so sorry about the wait. You know how captives can be, some are just so stubborn. I don’t believe we’ve been introduced. I worked for the Hammerhead. Perhaps you remember him?”
It took a minute for him to remember, but then it hit him. The long faced bastard he had burnt to a crisp a few months ago. He had tried to steal from the League, guess he didn’t get all of his lackeys.
The man continued, “In any case, we just wanted to let you know that since you took something of ours,” he had taken a decent amount of cash and equipment from their base, now that he thought about it, “we’ve taken something of yours.”
His blood ran cold. There was only one thing that he cared enough about for anyone to think about using as leverage. No.
No.
The video played on. “Come on, just look at the camera and say something. Just tell us your name, yeah?” There was a brief pause then a heavy snap as something hit the wall. What came next hit him like a truck.
“Go to hell.”
Then it was over.
His hand gripped tighter and tighter around the cellphone trapped between his fingers. He was going to kill them. All of them.
“I know that voice.”
Shit. He forgot the bird was still here. “I don’t kn-”
“Shut up Dabi,” Hawks snapped. “That was my friend Kei. Don’t play stupid. I would know her voice anywhere. Explain.”
There was a sharp edge to the hero’s voice he had never heard before. Dabi couldn’t waste time though, he had to go. Had to see it with his own eyes. Moving before Hawks caught up with him he shoved his phone and his hands into his pockets. If he didn’t keep them there he would strangle the next nearest person. Which in this case wouldn’t be so bad.
“It’s a long story,” was Dabi’s gruff reply.
Hawks landed in front of him and cut him off. “Then explain on the way over. I’m going with you.”
He didn’t have to ask how he knew where he was going, and no matter how much he wanted to fight, it would be faster with the bird-brain. “Fine.”
Dabi gave the minimum information necessary, which didn’t seem to satisfy the bird, and he had a feeling this wouldn’t be the end of this conversation. However as they got closer to the fire escape he didn’t care. The window to her apartment was open.
XXXX
The longer Kei was wherever the hell they were keeping her she hated it more and more. It was dark, dank, and overall unpleasant. But that was the point, she wasn’t supposed to enjoy this.
They left her alone after the video. At least for a few hours. Eventually they got bored and began to toy with the temperature of the cuffs (First’s quirk was some sort of metal manipulation) but it wasn’t unbearable. She just kept her eyes and mouth shut and tried to get some rest.
A difficult thing to do given her present circumstances.
She didn’t know what happened between them for this to happen, and frankly she was too tired to care. However, they were keeping her alive for something, and when she thought about why she didn’t like the answers she came up with.
Before Kei knew it light was filtering through the dingy window panes some feet above her seated position on the ground. First came through the door and switched her to a different set of cuffs, ones that weren’t attached to the wall, then had Wheezy walk her to the bathroom. Another day had begun.
Settled back into her corner she stared at the wall, ignoring whatever sound that came from the room next door. There was no rhyme or reason to her day, no metric by which she could measure how much time had passed aside from the shadows cast from the window. Sometimes they would mess with her chains, other times they just gave her a couple bruises, then there were times they left her alone.
It had to be the early hours of the morning before they came to her again. First and Wheezy were the only two she recognized, but it was what it was. She had no reason to care about what they looked like and what their names were.
She felt the familiar taste of panic rising in her throat as the cuffs went so cold it burned. Her wrists were pinned to the wall shortly after, leaving her open for whatever came next. She tried not to pay attention, eyes darting around the room, counting how many pieces of trash littered the floor in an attempt to keep herself grounded.
It worked, this time. But the longer she was here, the more frequently this happened the harder it was becoming. Soon enough she wouldn’t be able to keep quiet.
As her arms were finally dropped she curled in on herself. She could taste the blood on her tongue and felt it dripping from a split brow. The bruises would be bad, but that’s all they would be. Nothing was broken.
It took considerable effort to pull her head up from her knees, and even then she had to lean it back against the wall. The pounding was enough to make her fight to keep what little was in her stomach down, and it wasn’t making coming up with an escape plan any easier.
It wasn’t that she thought Dabi wouldn’t come for her, it was that she knew he was smart enough not to. She wasn’t worth the risk. Kei was on her own.
That was unless Hawks somehow found out what was going on, but even then.
Forcing her eyes open she looked around trying to find anything that could help her. However, among the old coffee cups, stacks of paper and ungodly amount of dirt there was nothing that looked like the keys that would undo her cuffs. Voices from the other room drug her focus back to the door.
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Well folks, here we are. The third go around with this and I hope it's the last. I'm happy with how this has come out, and since it is so much longer I'll be splitting this up into at least two posts. When I first wrote this not a lot was confirmed about Dabi and his backstory so there are some liberties taken with his character. He is very out of character for his current arc.
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
*Losing a best friend is hard. Having them show back up years later when they're supposed to be dead? Harder. What about when the feelings you had for each other start worming their way back up to the surface? Shit, feelings are such complicated things.
*Genre: angst, fluff if you squint, 18+, nsft,
*Pairing: Dabixfem!OC Kei (the character is fem presenting w/fem anatomy, but other physical descriptors are vague so can be read as a fem!reader insert)
*this could be triggering to those who have experienced the above, its not overly graphic in its violence, it is explicitly spicy though so fic is under the cut*
Kei had had a very long day. Each appointment seemed to drag, every file needed extra care, and conversations made her head throb. All she wanted to do was go home, eat an unhealthy amount of carbs, and go to bed. However, things rarely ever happened as she wanted them to. The hospital she worked at was in a part of town that was well known as a hub for criminal activity. She was used to it at this point, so as much as she wanted to say that she was surprised that someone had decided to try to follow her home, it wasn’t anything new. Stopping in a convenience store, she simply phoned the police and waited for an officer to escort her the rest of the way home.
When she made it to her apartment building she knew she should just go inside, that’s what she wanted to do anyway, but Hawks was in the neighborhood. If she didn’t at least go up to the roof to see if he was there she would never hear the end of it. So, begrudgingly she made her way up.
Letting the door shut behind her she called out “You out here bird-brain?”
Indeed, he was. However, he found himself in unsuitable company for the young doctor. Giving the man a mocking salute, he came out from behind the stairwell and gave his friend a warm smile. “Hey birdy, how was work? You’re later than usual.”
Taking a deep breath she met him halfway and dropped her head onto his chest. “It was a long day. I don’t understand people,” she groaned, “just let me walk home in peace and leave me alone.”
With a sigh of his own Hawks just ran his hands up and down her spine and Kei could feel some of her stress melt away. What she would do without him, she wasn’t sure, but to be frank she couldn’t say she was interested in finding out. She had already lost one best friend in her lifetime, to lose a second? No thanks. Pulling away she asked him how his day was. He gave her a grin and a wink.
“Oh, you know, nothing too exciting. Just how I like it.”
“You really are the world's laziest hero, aren’t you?”
“I prefer the term laid back. And is it so bad that there wasn’t any major catastrophe that needed my attention today? That sounds more like a you problem princess.”
Kei rolled her eyes and shoved his shoulder. “You know what I meant asshole.”
He opened his mouth to say something else, presumably just as snarky as what had just come out of it, but life has a sense of humor, and he was cut off by the ringing of his cell phone. So much for a lazy day in the life of a hero. Stepping away from her friend to give him space she stifled a yawn. It really had been a long day.
A moment later he bid his farewell, letting his wings carry him off the roof into the city skyline. Duty called. Kei watched him for a moment before looking around the roof. She really should head back inside, it was late, but for reasons unknown she decided to stay out just a little longer.
Letting her feet carry her around the roof she wandered aimlessly, eyes glued to the sky. She found herself heading toward the back of the stairwell and stopped a few steps short. Turning to face out towards the edge of the roof she tipped her head back to look at the sky. It was a full moon, and suddenly she found herself overwhelmed with a feeling of nostalgia. She used to stare up at the night sky almost religiously when she was younger. Kei could still name almost all the constellations that could be seen from where she was. There were weirder things to have been obsessed with as a kid she supposed but she hadn’t thought about it in a very long time.
Who could blame her, though? All she could think about when she looked at it now was a time in her life that hurt. It was easier to keep her eyes front and center, to try and convince herself that she was over it all. Lowering her gaze Kei sighed.
Feelings were such complicated things.
She didn’t know how long she stood there staring at nothing and everything all at once, but the persistent empty feeling in her stomach finally convinced her to go inside. She walked over to the door and punched in the code to unlock it, waiting to hear the heavy click of the bolt sliding before opening the door. It was a noisy process, and the screech that came from the hinges was enough to make Kei’s ears hurt. That was probably why she didn’t hear someone coming from behind the stairwell.
With a wince she rubbed the side of her face on her shoulder. When she opened her eyes there was someone standing to her right, but she couldn’t make out their features in the heavy shadow of the stairwell. She should have run, gotten inside as fast as she could, but for some reason her legs wouldn’t move. Then he stepped forward into the light.
A mixture of shock and fear washed over her, causing her hand to slip from the handle. There was no way. No possible way. It couldn’t be him. But she would know those eyes anywhere. She didn’t much recognize the face they were set in now, but then again, she didn’t look the same as she had in middle school either.
Tearing her gaze away from his eyes she took in the rest of him, noting how much taller he had gotten. Her eyes snagged at his side. His shirt was very obviously cut open by something, revealing an injury that Kei couldn’t see very well. It was still bleeding. Her fingers itched, wanting to get a closer look, but she had a feeling if she got closer she would be signing her own death certificate. She managed to croak out “You’re hurt.”
He cocked his head to the side, raising a brow. She was guessing that was not what he was expecting her to say, if he expected her to speak at all. He strode towards her, not stopping until he was nearly on top of her, caging her against the now shut and locked door. One hand next to her head, firmly pressed into the cool metal of the door, the other palm up eating up the narrow space between them. Kei watched as he called blue flames to dance on his open hand. “What about it dollface?”
Unshaken by the proximity to the flames she blinked at him slowly. “Let me help.”
Later she would kick herself and wonder just what the hell she was thinking. What the hell she was doing. But, if she was honest, she wasn’t thinking. It just came out. Besides she had taken care of her fair share of criminals at the hospital, she hardly thought about it anymore. She was sure that she could convince herself that their past had nothing to do with why she wanted to help. If he would let her.
“Why should I?” he asked, quirking a brow. She almost snapped at him, but she bit her tongue. Asking him if he saw anyone else volunteering to help probably wasn’t in her best interest. Kei sighed. Touya, no he went by Dabi now, clearly didn’t recognize her.
She was silent for a moment trying to think of what to do to convince him to let her help, then something clicked. Her hand moved before she had really even finished her thought, right pinky extending in the scant inches between their chests. She met his waiting gaze and said “You can call me Kei.”
Recognition flashed in those bright blue eyes and the hand he held between them faltered. His pinky never hooked around hers like it did in the past, but the flames did go out and his hand fell to his side.
*
Dabi knew that the woman in front of him had looked familiar, but he never would have thought that it would be Kei, much less that she would recognize him. Hell, his own family hadn't even figured out who he was. Not that he expected them to. She looked different now. Older. Prettier. He couldn’t help but wonder what had happened to her after he left, but he wouldn’t let himself find out. He wanted nothing to do with that life anymore. Nothing to do with those people, even if it was Kei. But, the pain in his side spiked, and he was acutely aware of the fact that he was still bleeding.
Pushing himself off the door he said “Alright dollface, lead the way.”
*
“Go down the fire escape eight floors and wait, I’ll unlock the window.” With that she turned around and punched in the code once more and stepped inside. Letting the quiet warmth fill her up her mind remained blissfully blank until she was unlocking her own door. As she shut it behind her those questions she thought she would ask herself later were swimming through her mind. What the actual fuck was she doing?
She had heard about Dabi in the news before but she had never paid enough attention to realize it was her childhood best friend. Her stomach tied itself in knots as she recalled headline after headline about the villain. He was dangerous, and she was just gonna let him into her apartment. No big deal, right? Did it matter that she was letting him in to stop him from bleeding out? She couldn’t decide.
Shit, she was such an idiot.
As she walked over to the window, time seemed to slow. Memories, the damn things, kept shoving their way to the front of her mind. Kei did her best to push them to the side. The man that was coming down her fire escape was not the same as the boy she remembered. She actually had to remind herself to breathe as she turned the locks and pulled the window open. Taking several steps back she let him climb into the apartment before turning to walk the short distance to the bathroom.
“Follow me.”
The thudding of heavy boots of wood told her he was close behind.
Reaching into the top cupboard Kei grabbed her first aid kit. Turning she saw that he was just standing in the doorway. She waved him in, saying “Coat and shirt off, I need to be able to see how bad you’re hurt.”
There was a devilish gleam in his eyes. “Demanding little thing aren’t you?”
The look she gave him was unamused. “Just do it,” she said dryly.
Still looking pleased with himself he came further into the small room and slipped the coat from his shoulders. His shirt was a more difficult task. It stuck to his side, tacky with blood. Kei’s hands instinctively reached to help the shaking villain, prying the fabric up and over his head. Only after seeing the smug look on his face did she realize that she should have just let him do it himself.
“Don’t say anything,” she warned, “now, let me look at your side.”
He sat on the bathroom counter and leaned back on his hands, letting her see. The worst wound was two short cuts rather than one long one, neither deep enough to need stitches. There were a myriad of smaller cuts littering his chest and arms as well. How long had he been bleeding to look like this, she wondered. She wasn’t going to ask, and she doubted she would get an honest answer. Besides, she really didn’t want to hear all the details of his work, nor did she want to find out just how much of that blood wasn’t his.
Grabbing something to disinfect the wounds she said “This may sting.” Which earned her a scoff, giving the distinct impression that he was offended by her forewarning. She fought the urge to roll her eyes, shaking her head as he hissed when she started on the gashes on his side, she almost said “I told you so,” but she didn’t think it wise.
Kei was quiet as she worked, cleaning and bandaging each cut, listening to the quiet sounds of their breathing. She tried not to think about his scars, or the fact that he was held together by staples. It was hard to tell how it made her feel. Was it anger? Sadness? Shame that she didn’t do more when they were younger, that she couldn’t do more now? Her guess was it was all of them. She took a deep breath and focused on what she was doing, shutting any other thoughts out. When she was done she stood and looked at his shirt that was in a pile on the floor.
“Don’t bother putting that shirt back on, it’s trash. I have one that should fit you.”
Once her hands were clean she brushed past him out of the bathroom and into her own. Going straight to her closet she pulled out a box and dug around in it for a few moments, not finding what she wanted at first. Eventually she was victorious, pulling out the black tee-shirt. Prize in hand she made her way out to her living room where she found Dabi. He was inspecting her bookshelves.
“What are all these books for?” he asked, pulling out a particularly large volume from her days in med school.
Holding out the shirt for him to take, she smiled. “Some of them were for school, there’s stuff for work too. The shelves on the other side have most of the books I read for fun, and there are some in my room.”
He grimaced, sliding the book back into its place. “What do you do for a living that has you reading such, exciting, titles?”
“I’m a doctor. Thanks to my quirk I got through school pretty fast. Some of those books are pretty interesting, but they aren’t for everyone. I get that.”
“You know only a nerd would say that, right,” he asked.
Something in his tone made her brain short circuit. Was he teasing her? She shook her head, trying to stop memories from sinking their claws into her mind. Clearing her throat she offered him the shirt again. She guessed it would fit, though, she hadn’t really paid attention to the fact that he was quite well muscled. Another thought to bury. As if he could read her mind he winked as he took the shirt and carefully pulled it over his shoulders. He was still in there, somewhere. But it didn’t matter, she would not get her hopes up just to be disappointed.
Still, it was late, and she had no idea where he was staying much less how he would get there in his state. He needed rest. She chewed on the inside of her lip for a moment before offering “You can crash on the couch if you want. You know where the bathroom is, and the kitchen is right there if you need anything.” He just looked at her, like he was waiting for something. Not sure what he wanted she just wrung her hands saying “I’ve got to go to bed, so, good night.”
Turning to go to her room she was grateful that there were already pillows and blankets on the couch, since that’s where she more than often found herself crashing, much to her own doctor's displeasure. Pulling the door shut behind her she sagged against it, feeling the exhaustion leaking from her bones. After a few moments she heard the familiar creak of the couch. He was staying but she doubted he would be there when she got up.
He wasn’t.
XXXX
*
The next time Dabi showed up was two weeks later. A solo mission gone wrong. He wasn’t sure how the bastards got the drop on him, but they had kicked the shit out of him. It was only because he was in the neighborhood that he thought of her. At least that’s what he told himself. Nevermind that he had thought about her damn near every day since she first bandaged him up. So he found his way up the fire escape to her window.
*
It was the early hours of the morning and Kei couldn’t sleep. One of her favorite patients had passed away the day before and her mind wouldn’t shut off. It wasn’t the first time, and it wouldn’t be the last, but that didn’t mean that she couldn’t be upset. Hawks had been by earlier in the night to make sure she ate and at least tried to sleep. He was successful in getting her to eat, but as evidenced by the fact that she was still awake, sleep was probably not in the picture tonight.
She was curled up on the couch, trying to read to make herself tired, when she heard the window slide open. With a jolt she was upright, heart racing. Turning she saw it was him.
Dabi was a mess. Cuts littered his arms, chest and from where he was on the fire escape she could tell he wasn’t putting much weight on his right leg. Wordlessly she got up and caught him as he tumbled through the window.
Half carrying him to the bathroom she instructed him to take his shirt and pants off. He struggled with the latter until Kei steadied him, then braced himself on the bathroom counter. In between gathering her supplies she watched him carefully, with how pale and clammy he was he should have gone to a hospital. He had probably lost a fair amount of blood, and there wasn’t much she could do for him in that regard. She knew why he didn’t though.
Doing a mental inventory of his wounds she was relieved to see that most were shallow and would heal just fine once she cleaned him up. However, the cut on his thigh would need stitches. She made quick work of his chest and arms, but his leg wouldn’t be so easy. He was lucky she had the supplies to do this in her apartment. She didn’t have anything to numb him with though, so she grabbed a clean rag and handed it to him.
“Bite. This is going to hurt.”
He said nothing, putting the rag in his mouth with shaking hands. Kei knew he felt like shit, anyone would in his state, but his eyes probably said more than he was aware of. It was so confusing. He was so different, but there were just some things that would never change. He was never able to hide how he felt, at least not completely. He had the most heartbreakingly expressive eyes. Eyes that flew open, then slammed shut as Kei’s needle pierced his skin.
A muffled “Fuck,” met her ears.
“I know this hurts, just a little longer. I promise.” Her gaze flicked up unexpectedly catching his. It dropped just as quickly. He was staring. She gave the tiniest shake of the head, refocusing on what she was doing, he just needed something to focus on. That’s all.
Finishing the suture she stood, placing the needle in a waste container. Dabi ripped the rag from his mouth and took a shallow breath. He let out a rough “Fucking hell,” as he raked a hand through his messy hair. Kei let him lean on her as she washed her hands, drying them with a towel when she was done.
“I’m sorry,” she murmured, “I know how bad it hurts. Can you sit back on the counter for a minute? Let me go grab you some clothes, I should have some sweats that will fit you.”
He nodded and let her help him back up and onto the counter, his knuckles white as he gripped the edge. Kei disappeared into her room just like she had the first time, and dug in that same box. Pulling out the sweats and an old band tee she stood and made her way back into the bathroom. Helping him off the counter, she held him steady until he stopped swaying so much. He tripped trying to step into the sweats, falling forward. Staggering backwards, Kei caught him, holding onto his biceps. Once they were steady she shifted her hands to his shoulders to push him up. What she didn’t plan on was him looking up as she did, which made her acutely aware of just how close their faces were.
She looked anywhere but directly at him as he finished clamoring into the clothes she gave him, the shirt was easier for him, but not by much. Helping him out of the bathroom she set him on the couch. He needed to take something for his pain, and she guessed from the looks of him that he needed to eat too. Pulling away from him she turned to head towards the kitchen, only to stop and look back at him when she felt his hand tug on her fingers.
“What are you doing, doll?” he asked. He sounded so tired. She almost reached out to touch the side of his face, he had always been a secret fan of casual touches, but she didn’t know him anymore. That felt like it would be crossing a line and she was hesitant to ask. For all she knew, she wouldn’t see him after tonight, so what was the point?
Still, she found herself giving his fingers a light squeeze and flashed a small smile. “I was just going to get you something to eat so you can take something for the pain.”
He blinked at her a few times then nodded slowly, letting go of her hand.
***
Dabi wasn’t sure why he had reached out for her hand, why he felt scared when she had turned away from him, why he so desperately wanted for her to sit next to him on the couch and let him lean into her. It all felt so foreign, feeling and wanting things that he hadn’t for so long. Then again, should he be surprised? He had always wanted Kei close to him. Ever since the day they met. He could still perfectly picture the way she clung to her fathers pant leg as he explained to his mother that she had accidentally managed to hit the ball she was playing with over the fence that separated their houses. As their parents talked she toddled her way over to him and offered her pinky to him, and told him her name. He hooked his little finger around hers and the rest was history.
From that day forward they made it a game to knock things into each other's yard, just so they would have an excuse to see each other again. It didn’t always work though, his father made sure of that. But she became a permanent fixture in his life. They would do anything to see each other, and he trusted her more than anyone else.
He knew that he couldn’t expect everything to be the way it was when he disappeared, and he didn’t want that. But he couldn’t make up his mind on what exactly he did want when it came to Kei now. Which probably just meant that he should stay the fuck away from her. She would just be a distraction, get in the way of what he needed to do, and though he would rather die than admit it out loud he would just get in her way. Make things worse for her, and he didn’t want that. The smart thing would be to leave and never look back, forget all about her. He was too tired to be smart right now though.
So he just let himself sink back into the couch and closed his eyes until he felt the cushions dip beside him. Peeling one eye open he found Kei there, setting a bowl with some sort of chicken and rice and a glass of water on the coffee table in front of him. She untucked a bottle of pills from the crook of her arm and shook a few out into the palm of her hand, then she held them out for him to take.
He drug the tips of his fingers across her palm, taking the pills into his own hands, then threw them back into his mouth and washed it down with the water she had brought him. They sat in silence after that as he ate. He kept stealing glances, watching her as she leaned back into the couch cushions, letting her head fall back. She looked so tired.
He could see the bags and dark circles under her eyes, and now that he wasn’t so close to passing out he noticed that when her eyes were open they were bloodshot and glassy. If he asked her what was wrong he wasn’t sure she would tell him, and for some reason that bothered him. Moreso, it bothered him that he was bothered by it. Frankly, he shouldn’t give a shit either way. That’s how it was with pretty much everyone he knew. If Shigaraki looked upset and wouldn’t tell him why he wouldn’t fucking care, he probably wouldn’t even say anything to him to begin with.
Kei, for reasons Dabi didn’t want to think about, was different.
***
Kei let out a sigh, exhaling to the point where she was sinking backwards into the couch, being swallowed up by the cushions. She shook her head and sat up, rubbing her face in her hands then slapping them down on her thighs before standing up. Looking over her shoulder at her, well she wasn’t sure what he was to her at this point (acquaintance would be the best word,) she found that he was staring intently at the leftover rice in his bowl.
“I can take that if you’re done,” she offered, “but if you aren’t no pressure.”
Her words seemed to pull him from whatever rabbit hole he had fallen into, as he held the bowl up to her waiting hand. He murmured a soft thank you before rubbing his eyes. As she walked into the kitchen she wondered what he had been thinking about, or if he had simply zoned out. Either was just as likely, there would be times when they would be together when they were kids and neither would say a word. They just sat in silence, enjoying the feeling of not being alone.
Back in the living room she raked her hands through her hair that had mostly fallen out of the ponytail she tied it into hours ago. She should go to her room, try to sleep on an actual mattress. She wished she had a guest room set up, or something better than her couch to offer him, but the other bedroom was an office of sorts. Really it was just a desk and some empty boxes. Guests aside from Hawks were rare, and after a while they both just said fuck it and would share her bed. He couldn’t sleep on her couch thanks to his wings, but he refused to use her bed while she slept on the couch. Dabi did not have the wing problem, and it would probably not go well if she offered to share her bed.
Couch it is then.
“If you want to stay, you can crash here again. If you need anything you know where the kitchen and bathroom are, and my room is the door to the right of the bathroom. But, you need rest, so I’m gonna go to bed.”
He just looked at her, and for a moment she thought he was going to say something, or reach out to touch her again. However, his hands stayed folded in his lap, and he simply nodded, muttering what sounded like good night. With a tight smile she turned away from him and went to bed.
He was gone again in the morning.
XXXX
Kei thought that the second time he came to her would be the last. It wasn’t until after the fifth night he came to her that she accepted this new addition to her routine. Each time he came to her window she cleaned him up and offered to let him stay. And each time she wanted to kick herself. She didn’t understand why she was doing this. It was all too easy to not think about what he did in the days, weeks even, that she didn’t see him. How he came to have all those cuts and bruises she took care of.
It worried her that she was starting to miss his company. That she wanted him around. That the small conversations they would have as he sat, bleeding on her bathroom counter, were one of few things that she looked forward to.
She just wondered how much longer she would be able to convince herself that she didn’t know why.
*
Dabi found himself wondering the same things. He wondered why she was doing this to herself. Why she was risking so much for him? Why she still held her pinky out for him to take, even after everything. They weren’t even speaking when he “died” so why wasn’t she angry with him? He knew she had mixed feelings about what was happening, about helping him. He could see it in the way she tensed when things were quiet, only to relax when something else pulled her from her thoughts.
It was eating him up at night as he stared at her ceiling, wrapped in blankets that smelled like her. Ultimately, he came to the conclusion that he was selfish, and maybe he didn’t want to forget everything about who he used to be. Not when she was right there in front of him. He wasn’t going to lose her twice. But he wouldn’t say that out loud.
Not yet.
XXXX
Kei kept her window unlocked. Some nights Dabi would show up, some nights he wouldn’t. Some nights he was beaten to hell, other nights he hardly had a scratch on him. What never changed was that if he showed up he stayed the night. Always.
He was never there when she woke up, but she always heard the familiar creak of the couch as he laid down. It wasn’t unlike when he would sneak over and spend the night when they were kids. Little by little the time they spent together started to feel easy. Familiar.
Tonight was the second time this week he had clambered into her home, and he was for the most part unscathed. It was early for him, it wasn’t even completely dark out when he had knocked on the glass. He followed her into the bathroom and let her slap a few bandaids here and there then made his home on her couch.
For a while they were quiet, Kei was standing at one of her bookshelves as he flipped through an old magazine her neighbor had given to her instead of throwing it out. If she was being honest she had no idea what the magazine was about, Kei had spent all of five seconds looking at it before tossing it on her coffee table. Whatever it was, it didn’t hold Dabi’s attention for very long. Soon enough she heard his voice break the silence.
“Hey doll,” he asked.
Lifting her fingers from the spine of an old book she felt her quirk settle back into its resting place before humming in response, the flow of words slowly fading from her mind. She would be lying if that was the only thing distracting her though. Just once, she wanted him to call her by her name, before this all inevitably goes away.
“How did you meet Hawks?”
That brought her back to full attention. Turning she watched as he leaned forward, propping his elbows on his knees. She had brought him up once or twice, but Dabi never gave any indication that he was curious. In fact he seemed to completely ignore that the hero was who she was talking about whenever he came up.
The story of how they met was, well, complicated and a bit of a long one. And frankly, not something that she liked to think about. There was an unfamiliar glint in his blue eyes, and she couldn’t place it. Glancing down at the magazine he had on the table in front of him she noticed that Hawks was plastered all over the cover. Kei couldn’t really make out the words of the headline, but at least she had an idea of why he was asking about him.
She pursed her lips, then cleared her throat before turning back to the bookcase. Thinking for a moment, she decided that she would just be vague, but honest.
“I met him at the police station a few years ago.”
“Oh? What did you do?” He asked, his voice teasing, but it made her go stiff. Dabi must have noticed because a moment later he spoke again, “Doll?”
She shook her head, as if it would make this easier, or at least make her less rigid. It didn’t. Dragging her hand over her mouth, then up and through her hair she sighed.
“Nothing,” she said, though it came out as if she was only talking to herself, “I did nothing. I was filing a report.”
A hand gently made its way over her shoulder, causing her to jump. When had he moved? He eased the pressure of his touch as she turned to face him, then his hand fell from her completely as he slid them into his pockets. Something about the way he looked at her compelled her to speak.
“I went to a special high school, one meant to fast track kids into certain careers based on their quirks. It’s how I was able to become a doctor so young,” she was looking anywhere but at him, and couldn’t stop fidgeting with her hands. “My second year, a guy transferred in from a different school. He seemed really nice, and we were in the same class, and he sort of joined my friend group. We hung out a few times, and then we started dating. For a while, it was good. Then it wasn’t.”
“He was a different person when we were alone. And I didn’t really know what to do. I didn’t think there was anything I could do. He had me so convinced that no one would believe me, that no one would ever want me if I left. I was terrified, so I stayed.” Her hands were shaking so badly that she crossed her arms, and let her fingers dig into her biceps. “I stayed, and once we had graduated I moved in with him. It was like that started everything over again, but it went downhill faster than it had before, and it got worse. One night it was harder to hide than others, he didn’t like that I was talking to a guy I was in school with, nevermind it was just for a project. And, well, let’s just say we didn’t have a glass door out to the backyard anymore. The neighbors heard and called the cops and it gave me a way out. Once I was out of the hospital I went to the police station to finish filing the paperwork and as I was leaving I ran straight into Hawks and spilled my coffee all over him.”
“He helped me come out of a really hard place, and was the first friend I had made in a long time.”
Long fingers curled over hers, prying them away from her arms, and instead of letting go he laced his fingers with hers and squeezed. He was shaking, she could feel it as he held her hands, and she had a feeling he was doing this as much for himself as he was for her. It didn’t bother her though.
No, she wanted to feel his warm hands forever. The way he was dragging his thumbs over hers was so soft. She swallowed before looking at him finally. The gentleness of his touch didn’t match the feeling behind the expression he wore.
“Where is he now?” he asked softly, his voice teeming with quiet rage.
“I don’t know,” she said thickly. Blinking rapidly she was surprised when she felt tears slide down her cheeks. He let go of her, only to take her face in his hands to wipe them away. Kei wasn’t sure if the tears that followed were because of what she told him, or because of how he held her. She was certain, however, that he gave the best hugs. He wrapped one arm around her neck, running his fingers through her hair, as the other dropped to snake around her waist.
He held her until the tears stopped, only loosening his grip when she began to pull away to move the hand from her hair to her cheek. With a sniff she gave him a watery smile.
“I’m fine, really.” An answer to a silent question. “Just promise me something,” she said, watching him carefully, “promise me you’ll leave it. Don’t look for him.”
He watched her just as intently as he mulled over her request. It was the longest minute of Kei’s life, waiting for him to respond. Eventually he nodded and retreated back to the couch taking the warmth of his touch with him.
Ignoring the shitty blurring I did, this is currently what Lover of Mine, the third is sitting at word count wise. The right side was what the second finished at. So, it's a substantial increase from two to three. I'm going to touch up a few things before sharing three with you all, but I hope to have it up today or tomorrow.
Well, work has kicked my ass this week, today especially so I haven't fully finished what I have been writing but I did manage to get my two functioning braincells to get along long enough to make this. It's a new cover for Lover of Mine. For some reason I keep going back to that fic and thinking it could be better, so that's what I've been working on. One day, hopefully when I finish this rewrite, I'll let it be. That being said, it is now over doubled in length, more fleshed out in plot (I hope, but the romance was the plot to begin with) and explicitly spicy. Here's hoping I can get it done this weekend and get some feedback. Thanks again for sticking around.
Time for my once in a blue moon post. I won't lie, life has been busy so I haven't been writing much. I can say that I have a rewrite of something close to being done, and I feel like it's much better, not to mention twice as long as what it was, so I may have that posted in the next few days. Aside from that, I'll update as I can. Thanks again for being here, ✌
I'm not dead, surprise! But for real, I'm gonna try and get some stuff up soon. In the mean time, here's a post about what songs make me think about some BNHA characters! Can you guess what genre I've been listening too recently?
Dabi/ Touya Todoroki
Keep Myself Alive by Get Scared
Numb by Linkin Park
Bite My Tongue by You Me At Six
My Songs Know What You Did in the Dark by Fall Out Boy
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Hey, I know I've been really quite for a while. But I'm working on a few things and I hope to have some stuff to post soon! Life got crazy, so it was hard to keep up. Thanks for being here 💜
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Hi! If the fluff alphabet is still going on, could I ask for A, B, N, O, and U for Shoto? If that’s too many letters, you totally don’t have to do all of them. Thank you! ♥️
Hi there! This has been sitting for a long while, so I apologize for that! Fluff alphabet is closed but I'm getting caught up on my inbox. With that being said, let's get going!
Todoroki Shouto Fluff Alphabet: A,B,N,O, U
Activities- what do they like to do with their s/o? how do they spend their free time with them?
I feel like he likes to read with you, whether it's an audiobook you listen to, you reading to him or vice versa, or just sitting in the same room as you as you read different things.
I think it gives him peace. Also big on the bookstore.
Going out to eat is probably a big one, be it soba or just coffee he doesn't really cook a whole lot so take out and restaurants are a staple in your lives.
If you're into it, he also likes to train with you. It kills two birds with one stone, spending time with you and getting work done. If you aren't he appreciates if you come with him and give moral support.
Beauty- what do they admire about their s/o? what do they think is beautiful about them?
I know that this is a bit of a cop out answer, but truly I don't think that there is anything he wouldn't find beautiful about you. I think he is obviously physically attracted to his s/o, that is still important, but for the most part he becomes more drawn to your personality and that is what stands out the most to him.
He values your strength and admires that you aren't afraid to be vulnerable with him. I think vulnerability is a hard thing for him and with you your implicit trust and faith is an eyeopener.
You inspire him.
Nicknames- what do they call their s/o?
In another post.
On Cloud Nine- what are they like when they are in love? is it obvious for others? how do they express their feelings?
Boy is it obvious for everyone around him. I think he's a bit oblivious to his own feelings, especially if it's the first time he's really having these kinds of feelings.
He get's better with time and experience I promise lol.
I think when he's in love he fights with himself a lot if you aren't together yet. He wants to spend as much time with you as possible, he wants to bottle your laugh and have the picture of your smile ingrained in his mind. But he doesn't want to seem creepy or possessive so it's this hot and cold (HA) relationship for a while.
Some days he's like Velcro to your side and others he gives you all the space in the world. He just wants you to be happy and if he doesn't know that he's what makes you happy he's just confused.
He expresses his feelings by both words and actions. He is very blunt with you (but he won't confess until he's sure, or provoked, either one) so that means you get the "secret love child" side of him lol. He will also buy your lunch, walk you home and be a general sweetheart.
Understanding- how good do they know their partner? are they empathetic?
He knows you so well, from being your friend before the relationship, and from learning everything about you he can once in the relationship.
You are the best book he's ever read.
That being said, it's not that he isn't empathetic, he can be and is generally sweet to you (ex. soba with midoriya incident) but I think that he, like any human being, may struggle to fully understand sometimes. Which is fine, he never uses that as an excuse to not be nice to you but he may have questions and when you're ready, an explanation of how your brain works lol.
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