ScatterKat

Notes:

Warnings: smut, car accident, injury, a child in emotional distress (but no physical injury to child), mentions of PTSD/trauma

Also I don't have kids, so I was doing a lot of googling about stages of development, apologies if I got any of it wrong.

Edit: There's now a sequel.

Edit 2: Fluffy Christmas one-shot.

--

The radio in Mare’s car crackled to life. “We have a report of a car accident on Main Street. Looks like a drunk driver T-boned another car and fled. Paramedics are on their way, but we need any units in the area on the scene.”

Mare did a U-turn. She and Colin had been on their way to interview some witnesses, but that could wait. Colin grabbed the radio to let dispatch know they were on their way, and then held on tight as Mare drove them to Main Street.

It wasn’t a pretty sight. The driver’s side of the car was completely crumpled, and there was broken glass everywhere. Mare pulled up beside it, and she and Colin got out.

“Alright folks, move along,” said Colin, trying to hustle some bystanders away from the scene.

“Shit.” He turned as Mare swore loudly.

“What?”

“I know this car. It’s Y/N’s. I really hope-” Before she could finish her sentence, a loud wail cut her off. It was unmistakably the cry of a child.

“MAMA!”

Colin followed the sound. Thankfully, mercifully, the child was strapped into a baby seat on the side that hadn’t been hit. The window was open a crack, so he worked his hand inside it and unlocked the car door from the inside.

“MAMA,” the baby wailed again, and Colin winced. It was awful to hear the sound of a child in distress.

The little girl had short hair and a bright orange dress with white flowers sewn into it. She looked to be about 18 months old. With shaking hands, Colin unstrapped her from the car seat and lifted her out.

As he did so, he saw the driver of the car. She was covered in blood and not moving. He hoped she was just unconscious.

He held the baby against his chest, shielding her from the sight of her injured mother.

“Is she okay?” said Mare, coming around the side of the car to look at the little girl.

“The baby seems uninjured, but distressed. The driver looks badly hurt.”

The baby cried out again, and Colin wondered if she could understand him. He didn’t know much about babies.

“Hey, hey sweetheart, it’s gonna be okay,” said Mare soothingly, holding out her arms to take the baby from him. He handed her over immediately. Mare had kids and a grandkid; she knew what she was doing far more than he did. “Shh, shh, Daisy, it’s gonna be okay.”

Daisy clenched her fists and slammed them into Mare’s chest.

“MAMA,” she screamed. As Mare readjusted her grip, the baby grabbed a handful of her hair and pulled hard. Mare cursed.

In the distance, Colin heard sirens.

“Here,” said Mare, holding Daisy out to Colin again. “Your hair is less pull-able than mine.”

He took the baby uncertainly. For the briefest moment, she stopped screaming and looked up at him with big, shiny eyes.

“Hey Daisy,” he said softly. “You’re gonna be okay. Your mama’s gonna be okay. Okay?”

Daisy just stared up at him. Her eyes were red and her nose was streaming. Her lip wobbled, and his heart broke. Her little fists gripped the front of his jacket and she slammed her forehead into his chest.

“Woah, hey, hey.” He held her tighter, scared he was going to drop her, but she didn’t do it again. Instead, she began to sob, her cries muffled by his jacket.

Wordlessly, he held her as he watched the paramedics remove the driver from the car and begin first aid. He felt ill. He’d seen plenty of horrible things in his time as a cop, but something about holding this tiny human in his arms made this all more real.

The driver was stretchered into the ambulance. Colin couldn’t take his eyes off of her. Daisy’s sobs had given way to shaky, uneven breathing now.

“Come on,” said Mare, opening up her car door.

“Huh?”

“They’re taking her the hospital, but we should get Daisy checked up too, just in case. Poor thing is probably in shock.”

“Right, right, of course.” Still, he didn’t move. There wasn’t a baby seat in Mare’s car, so he wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do with the baby. Mare read the uncertainty on his face.

“She can ride on your lap the journey. Not strictly legal, I know, but we need to get her there, and I don’t want her riding in the ambulance. She shouldn’t have to see her mother like that.”

“Of course.”

The ride to the hospital was quiet apart from Daisy’s occasional sobs. Colin – again, very unfamiliar with how to deal with kids – stroked her back soothingly. It seemed to help. He kept his other arm wrapped securely around her.

She rested her head against his chest. As they pulled in the hospital parking lot, he realised that she had fallen asleep on him. Mare stopped the car and looked over at him.

“She must’ve cried herself out,” she said quietly, letting herself out of the car.

Carefully not to jostle Daisy, Colin opened the door and manoeuvred awkwardly out of the door. He shut it quietly behind him, but thankfully, Daisy didn’t even stir. She was fast asleep.

“You alright with her?” Mare asked as Colin readjusted his hold on the baby to make them both more comfortable.

“Yeah, I got her.”

“Let’s go, then.”

Colin sat in a waiting room while Mare debriefed with the doctors. The driver was in triage, but it looked like she was going to need surgery. Her condition was stable, though, which was a huge relief.

Mare waved Colin over, so he got to his feet cautiously. In his arms, Daisy made a small whining noise, and he froze. Her long eyelashes fluttered, and she looked up at him with confusion and curiosity.

“Hey sweetheart,” he said, walking her over to where Mare was standing. Daisy’s only response was to grab hold of his tie.

“We’re gonna give Daisy a check-up to make sure she’s not hurt,” said one of the doctors. “Follow me.”

At the doctor’s instructions, Colin set Daisy down on the examination table. He tried to straighten up, but found he couldn’t, because she was still holding onto his tie.

“Uh…” He looked at Mare for guidance, and could see that she was stifling a laugh.

“If you want to stay with her, that might make this easier,” said the doctor. “Distract her.”

“Right, okay.”

The doctor checked Daisy for injuries. When he shined a light in her eye to see if she was concussed, she began to cry again, tugging on Colin’s tie. He put a hand on her shoulder to hold her steady as the doctor finished his examination.

“She’s not concussed,” he said. “And she has no visible injuries. She is, understandably, in a lot of emotional distress but you’re doing a remarkable job of keeping her calm. Once her mother is awake, we’ll discuss options for referring her to a specialist. In the meantime, you can only try to ensure that she feels safe.”

“Thanks, doc,” said Colin. Daisy tugged on his tie again, so he lifted her up into his arms. She rested her head on his chest.

“She must be exhausted,” said Mare. “I’ll call the station to see if they’ve managed to get hold of any of Y/N’s family to come pick her up. Come on, Zabel.”

Daisy fell asleep across two seats in the hospital waiting room, using her chubby little hands as a pillow. When they saw this, one of the nurses brought over a pillow and a blanket, which Colin took gratefully. With the nurse’s help, he made Daisy a little makeshift bed and laid her down in it.

“Once her mother’s out of surgery, we should be able to set up a crib for her in the recovery room,” said the nurse. “But for the time being, this is the best we can do.”

“Thank you,” said Colin. As the nurse left, Mare walked back in. She was starting to look exhausted too.

“I’ve got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?”

“Bad news,” said Colin decisively.

“Most of Y/N’s family live out of the country. There isn’t anyone local. We’ve tried to call a few of her friends in town, but none of them have picked up so far, so this is just a waiting game at this point. Are you alright with staying with Daisy until someone can come and take her?”

“Of course.”

“Good. She seems to have taken to you.”

“What’s the good news?”

“One of the witnesses took down the license plate of the car that hit her. A store overlooking the area where the accident occurred has CCTV that shows the crash. So we’re gonna be able to track down the person who did it.”

“Hm.” The good news wasn’t as good as he’d hoped. Obviously it was important to catch the guy, but he was more concerned about Daisy. As much as he didn’t mind babysitting, he knew he wasn’t the best person for the job, especially since it meant she was sleeping on waiting room chairs.

“Are you alright looking after her on your own for like an hour? I need to go back to the station, but I’ll be back soon.”

“Yeah, yeah that’s fine,” said Colin. There was no need to wake Daisy for that.

“Great. I’ll pick up some food on the way back.”

“Thank you.”

*

It was almost 7pm when Mare got back, carrying a shopping bag containing some fruit and yogurt pouches. She found Daisy awake, sitting in Colin’s lap and staring up at him with admiration. She was babbling, and although it was mostly nonsense words, Colin was listening very seriously.

“Hey,” said Mare, setting down the shopping bag beside him.

Colin looked up, almost surprised to see her. “Hey.”

“There’s some food for Daisy in there, and I got you a coffee,” she said, setting his cup on the low table in front of him, out of Daisy’s reach.

“Thank you.” Colin opened the bag and started rifling through it. Daisy started making grabby hands towards it.

“Baba,” she said. He looked down at her. “Baba.” She pointed.

“You want a banana?”

“Baba,” she repeated.

Colin picked up a banana and peeled it. He looked up at Mare uncertainly. “Do I need to mash this for her? Or…?”

“Chew it and then spit it into her mouth like a bird,” she said in a deadpan voice. At Colin’s alarmed expression, she rolled her eyes. “Just break it up into bitesize chunks and give them to her, okay?”

“Right. Right.”

He broke off a piece of banana and handed it to Daisy, who took it gratefully.

As he fed Daisy, Mare cleared her throat. “Station managed to get hold of one of Y/N’s friends. She’s on her way here now. She’ll be able to take Daisy off your hands.”

“Caw,” said Daisy, holding out a piece of banana to him. Mare watched the tips of his ears turn pink.

“I tried to teach her to say my name,” he said, “but that’s about as far as she got.” Mare chuckled.

“Caw!” Daisy was more insistent, putting the banana in his hand.

“Is this for me?” he asked. She just looked up into his eyes, smiling up at him. His heart melted. He ate the chunk of banana. It was kind of mushy and gross, but he couldn’t say no to that face. “Do you want some more? Or do you want something else?”

“No,” she said, putting her head on his chest again. “Caw.”

At that moment, another woman walked into the waiting room.

“Daisy,” she cried out, looking relieved. Daisy turned.

“Lu-lu,” she said, drawing out each syllable.

“I’m so glad you’re okay,” she said, reaching out to take her. Colin leant back, and Daisy didn’t resist as the woman took the baby into her arms.

“This is Louise, Y/N’s friend,” Mare explained. “She’s here to look after Daisy.”

“Where’s Y/N?” asked Louise.

“Still in surgery. But they think she’s going to be okay.”

Louise wiped her face. It was obvious that she’d been crying.

“That’s good. I should probably get Daisy home. I have keys to Y/N’s place and Daisy must be exhausted,” she said. Mare put a hand on her shoulder.

“The hospital will call you and keep you updated.”

“Thank you.” Louise’s voice sounded a little hoarse. “Come on, Daisy. Let’s get you home.”

“Caw?” said Daisy in confusion, looking at Colin over Louise’s shoulder. Colin waved at her. As Louise moved towards the door, Daisy seemed to realise what was happening, and started to cry again. “Caw.”

“Detective Colin Zabel was watching Daisy while we were looking for someone to come pick her up,” Mare explained. “I think Daisy is a little attached.”

“Oh,” said Louise, looking back at him. “Thanks so much for taking care of her. Come on, Daisy. Say bye-bye Colin.”

“Caw,” Daisy cried, reaching her hand out towards Colin. He waved again, because he didn’t know what else to do.

“Come on Daisy, I’ll get you some ice cream on the way home.” That didn’t help. With a crying Daisy propped on one hip, and Mare’s bag of snacks in the other hand, Louise left the hospital.

Colin exhaled hard as soon as Daisy was out of sight.

“You doing alright there, Zabel?” asked Mare.

“Yeah… Just a pretty intense day, right?”

“Right.”

*

You don’t remember the crash. One moment, you driving down Main Street, the next, you woke up in a hospital bed, feeling hazy and confused. There was a cannula sticking out of your hand.

“What… what…” You tried to call out, but your voice was hoarse. “Help… me…”

It felt like an age before anyone came. A person – a doctor or a nurse, you couldn’t tell – dressed in scrubs, pulled back the curtain around your bed.

“You’re awake. That’s good,” she said.

“What’s happening…” You felt simultaneously frantic and lethargic, and it was hell.

“Your car was hit by a drunk driver. You fractured your arm and a couple of your ribs, as well as a concussion. You just got out of surgery.”

Your stomach felt like it had dropped right out of you.

“Where’s my baby?” Why wasn’t Daisy here? You didn’t dare even think about it. You were crying, you realised.

“She’s okay. Your friend Louise is looking after her. She was a little shaken up, but completely uninjured. It was a miracle really.”

You exhaled shakily, and then winced. You supposed that was the broken ribs.

“Can I see her?” you asked.

“It’s past midnight. Louise said she would come back tomorrow morning. In the meantime, you should rest.”

“It hurts,” you said, closing your eyes.

“I’ll get you some more pain medication.”

You closed your eyes. They put the medicine straight into the cannula, so you didn’t even feel it. You slept.

*

When you next woke, Louise was sitting on the chair beside your bed. Daisy was in her lap, balancing a colouring book on her knees and scribbling in it in crayon.

“Daisy?” you whispered. It hurt to speak.

“Mama?” Daisy’s tried to wriggle out of Louise’s lap, throwing her arms out towards you.

“Hey, hey, be careful,” said Louise, standing up. “Mama’s pretty fragile right now, okay? You need to be gentle.”

You held out your arms, and very gingerly, Louise placed your daughter in them. Daisy wrapped her arms around you and buried her face in your neck. You felt her tears. You could hear her quiet snuffling. You hugged her as tightly as you could with your good arm.

“It’s okay, my love,” you said softly. “Mama’s here now.”

Over the top of Daisy’s head, you made eye contact with Louise.

“How are you feeling?” she asked.

“Sore,” you said. “And tired. But glad that Daisy is okay. Thank you for looking after her.”

“Of course,” she said. “I can take care of her as long as you need.”

“Thank you.” You held Daisy to your chest, stroking her hair. She clung to you fiercely, unsure how long it would be before she had to let go.

Louise, to her credit, didn’t try to have a conversation with you. She just sat there quietly while you rocked your baby, until your eyelids began to flutter. Louise took that as her cue to stand up.

“Come on, sweetheart,” she said, as kindly as she could.

“Mama,” said Daisy, sounding distressed.

“Yes, baby?”

She pressed a very damp kiss to your cheek. With your good hand, you wiped away her tears.

“Want mama,” she said.

“Of course, baby, but mama’s pretty tired and sore right now. Auntie Lulu is gonna take care of you until mama gets better, okay?”

Daisy was still crying, silently. It was strange to see her cry without her wailing. It made you nervous. Louise cleared her throat.

“The doctor said something about getting a referral to a child psychiatrist, just to ensure that isn’t any lasting emotional damage from the accident.”

“That makes sense,” you said. You were very tired. You sat back against your pillows, struggling to keep your eyes open.

“Okay, Daisy,” said Louise. “Mama needs to rest now, okay?” She tried to lift her out of your lap, but Daisy began to scream, trying to grab onto any part of you she could reach.

“WANT MAMA WANT MAMA WANT MAMA WANT MAMA,” she wailed. She grabbed your bad arm, and you cried out in pain. She immediately stopped screaming, staring at you with big, frightened wide eyes.

“It’s okay, baby,” you said, trying to keep the pain out of your voice. You stroked her hair with your good hand. “Mama’s arm is just a bit sore, okay? You need to go with Auntie Lulu now.”

This time, she didn’t resist when Louise picked her up.

“We’re gonna go watch some cartoons, aren’t we Daisy?” said Louise, trying to smile. Daisy didn’t look at her. She looked down instead.

You watched them leave the room, your heart aching.

*

Recovery was rough. Being a single mother was hard enough at the best of times, but trying to do it with a broken arm and three cracked ribs was nightmarish. Louise was with you as much as she could be – babysitting and keeping the house clean and making sure you were both eating healthily – but she had a job, and wasn’t around all the time.

A week and a half after the accident, you met up with her for coffee before she had to go to work. You were trying to be less dependent on her, but Daisy had grown shy and withdrawn and it worried you.

The doctor had mentioned the possibility of PTSD. You didn’t even know that babies that young could get PTSD. You were waiting for the referral to the child psychiatrist, and it couldn’t come soon enough.

The driver who hit you had been arrested. As suspected, he had been drunk. You would probably be expected to testify in court, and the idea was terrifying.

“Caw!” shouted Daisy suddenly, cutting through your conversation with Louise and making you jump. It was very loud for this time in the morning.

“Shh, baby,” you murmured, but Daisy wasn’t paying attention to you.

“Caw!!!” she said more desperately, throwing out her hand. You realised that she was pointing.

There was a man in the queue, clutching a coffee cup in hand and staring right back at your daughter, looking shocked.

“Caw,” Daisy whined, struggling against her high chair. Somehow, she managed to wriggle her way out of her restraints and stand up, and you nearly knocked over your table in your haste to stop her from falling.

The man from the queue got there first though, his hand awkwardly hovering next to her, as if he was afraid to touch her but wanted to be ready to catch her if she did fall.

“Cawwww,” said Daisy, grabbing onto the man’s sleeve.

“I’m so sorry,” you said, trying to pry her fingers off of him one-handed. “I don’t know what’s got into her.”

“I do,” said Louise, looking amused. She took a sip of her coffee. “This is the detective who was babysitting her while you were in surgery.”

“Oh.” Louise had mentioned something about him before, but you hadn’t really taken it in. For the first time, you looked at him properly. As he rubbed the back of his neck with one hand, you were struck by how handsome he was.

“Detective Colin Zabel,” he said. He moved as if to shake your hand, but clearly realised that both of your hands were occupied, so quickly dropped it. You gave him your name in return.

“I owe you a coffee,” you said. He cleared his throat, looking a little pink in the face. Whining, Daisy stood up again and made grabby hands at him.

“Can I?” Colin asked, looking at you warily.

“Go ahead.”

Carefully, like he was afraid he’d break her, he picked Daisy up and held her against his chest. She threw her chubby little arms around his neck as best she could, hugging him with everything she had.

“I hate to interrupt, but I’ve gotta get to work,” said Louise.

“Right,” said Colin. “Me too.” A little reluctantly, he handed Daisy to you, careful to avoid your injured arm. Daisy started to cry, so you held her tighter.

“About that coffee I owe you…” you said.

“Here, I’ll give you my number.” He scribbled it down on the back of his receipt. You didn’t have a free hand, so he slipped it into your handbag.

Daisy wasn’t happy about leaving, but you promised her that she’d be seeing Colin again soon. Louise gave you a knowing look as you left the coffee shop.

*

That weekend, you met Colin outside of that same coffee shop, with Daisy balanced on your hip. He had been looking down at his phone, but when you approached, he looked at both of you, his face lighting up.

“Hello ladies,” he said. “It’s good to see you.”

“CAW!” shouted Daisy, and he chuckled. You passed her to him, thankful to have your good arm back temporarily.

“Hi princess,” he said, gazing fondly down at her. You felt a warm tingle in your belly.

So maybe you were starting to develop a bit of a crush on the handsome guy who your daughter seemed to love. That was natural. Your motherly instincts were clearly kicking in.

Colin sat with Daisy in a booth while you went to get the coffees. You also decided to get a couple of pastries to share between the three of you. This place didn’t usually do table service, but it was quiet, and you had a broken arm, so the barista said she’d bring it over to your table.

In the booth, Colin had spread one of Daisy’s colouring books in front of him. Daisy seemed to be insisting that he draw, not her, so he had a crayon in one hand.

“What colour should I do the hat, Daisy? Red? Or blue?” He held up the crayons for her to pick one. She chose red, so he obliged.

You settled down into your seat, watching the two of them fondly. Colin seemed engrossed in what Daisy was saying, even though it was just babbling and baby talk.

“Not giving you any trouble, I hope,” you said, smiling at the two of them. Colin looked over at you, like he’d only just noticed you there.

“She’s an angel,” he said, with a soft, contented expression on his face.

The barista brought over your coffees and pastries, and a juice for Daisy. You broke off a little piece of muffin and fed it to your daughter.

“This is all very kind of you,” said Colin. “You really didn’t have to do this.”

“You took care of Daisy when I couldn’t. And she seems to really like you. This is the least I can do.” The fact that he was cute didn’t hurt.

He ripped a piece of pastry and dipped it in his coffee, while you helped Daisy with her juice.

“So, uh…” Colin scratched the back of his neck. “Forgive me if this is a personal question, but is Daisy’s father in the picture?”

“He left before she was born,” you said, not looking at him. Your eyes followed Daisy’s hands as she filled in her colouring book.

“Oh. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. He was an asshole. He realised he wasn’t attracted to me anymore after my body changed with the pregnancy, and he dipped.”

“Wow.” Colin’s eyes were wide. “That’s awful. Sounds like you dodged a bullet though. What kind of guy does that?”

“The wrong kind, evidently.” You took a sip of your coffee. “I tried to call him after the accident. Straight to voicemail. I texted him too. He saw the messages and ignored them. He doesn’t care about me or Daisy. You’re right. I did dodge a bullet.”

“Y/N…” Colin covered your hand with his, and goosebumps spread up your arm. “I’m sorry. You deserve better than that.” You giggled, embarrassingly girlishly.

Before you could say anything else, Colin’s phone rang. He flipped it over, checked the caller ID, and winced.

“I’m sorry. It’s work stuff. I gotta take it,” he said.

“Don’t worry.”

He answered the phone. “Hey Mare.” Even though you could only hear one side of the conversation, it didn’t seem like good news. When he hung up, he looked at you sadly. “I’m really sorry. I’ve gotta go.”

“That’s okay,” you said, looking down at your half-finished coffee.

“Caw?” said Daisy, looking up from her colouring book.

“I’ll make it up to you,” he said. “We can get dinner some time. I don’t really know many people in town so… It’s nice to make friends.” Friends. Right.

“I’d like that.”

“Caw,” Daisy whined.

“I’ll see you later, kiddo,” he said, ruffling her hair. And then he was gone, leaving you with your heart racing.

*

In the following months, you really did become friends. It started with meeting up for dinner at a diner, and then at the coffee shop, and then at the park, and then at your house.

After that, he came over a lot. Daisy was always happy to see him, and it was easier not having to wrangle her into a car seat to go and meet him in public.

He was always such a sweetheart. He was handsome, and kind, and good with Daisy. There was only one problem.

Mare.

You first noticed it when you came to court to testify about the car accident. Louise was watching Daisy, and so it was your first time interacting with Colin alone.

He had been sweet and friendly and reassuring, which was precisely what you needed going in, but then Mare arrived. She was perfectly nice to you, but very abrupt with Colin, and even so, he looked at her with hearts in his eyes.

So he had feelings for her. Got it. He’d already told you that he wanted to be friends. He’d never given you any indication that he wanted anything more from you. You could do friendship.

For Daisy’s sake, and your own, you were not going to screw up this friendship by coming on too strong.

So you withdrew a little. Invited him over for dinner often, but always kept a distance between you. Never openly flirtatious. Tried not to touch him more than necessary. But afterwards, when you were alone in your room, it was him you thought of when you touched yourself.

When Louise offered to set you up on a blind date with one of her co-workers, you couldn’t think of a good reason to refuse. You had told her you weren’t interested in Colin – she was sceptical – and more than once you’d expressed a desire to be in a relationship. So what was the harm? Maybe this guy would be nice.

“Thank you so much for doing this,” you said, probably for the third time.

“Any time,” said Colin, grinning at you. “It’s a pleasure.”

“She’s already asleep, but sometimes she gets fussy at night. Warm milk will put her right to sleep.”

“Of course.”

“And you have my number if there are any problems.”

“Y/N.” Colin put his hand on your shoulders. “It’ll be fine. You go enjoy your date.” Your skin felt hot where it touched his. You were wearing a sleeveless dress and the contact was making your heart stutter.

“Thank you.” You covered his hand with yours and squeezed.

You took a cab to the restaurant where you were meeting your date, and found him already at your reserved table when you arrived. He stood up when he saw you.

“Robert,” he said, offering you his hand.

“Y/N,” you replied, shaking it.

“Louise told me that you were beautiful, but wow.” Your cheeks grew warm. Maybe this would be okay.

You ordered appetisers while you perused the menu. As you scanned down the page, you felt a pang of anxiety.

“Are you alright?” asked Robert, cutting himself off mid-sentence. “You seem… distracted?”

“Sorry.” You chuckled nervously. “I haven’t really been out without my daughter since she was born. It’s weird to be away from her for this long.”

“That’s understandable. I know how that goes.”

“Louise said that you had kids?” It had been one of her selling points to you. You were both single parents.

Robert nodded. “Two sons, aged twelve and ten.”

You checked your watch. You’d barely been here twenty minutes, but you couldn’t escape the feeling that you’d been out too long. You’d rather be at home. With Daisy. With Colin.

Robert seemed nice. He seemed dependable. He maybe even seemed interesting. But he wasn’t Colin.

The waitress came over to take your order, but you waved her off.

“I’m really sorry,” you said to Robert. “I thought I was ready for this, but I’m clearly not. You seem like a nice guy, but…” You trailed off, not sure if you wanted to tell him that you had feelings for someone else. The someone else who was currently babysitting your daughter.

“You want to get home to your daughter?”

You exhaled. “Yeah.” It wasn’t a lie, but it wasn’t the whole truth either.

“Say no more. I’ve give you a ride home.”

You tried to pay for your portion of the appetisers, but Robert wouldn’t let you. The drive back to your house could’ve been awkward, but Robert filled the space with meaningless chatter, and you were grateful.

As you put your hand on the car door handle, he touched your shoulder, and you almost flinched.

“You have my number. Call me, if you change your mind.”

“Thank you,” you said, because it was politer than saying ‘don’t hold your breath’. You got out of the car. Your hands were shaking as you put the key in the lock. As soon as you’d got the front door open, you heard Robert start his engine and drive away.

Colin met you in the hallway, a concerned look on his face.

“Y/N?”

“Hey…” you said. You slipped past him into the kitchen and grabbed yourself a glass of water. You could feel Colin’s presence in the doorway behind you.

“Is everything okay?” he asked. “You’re back early. Did something happen? Did that guy do something?”

You turned to face him. “No, he was lovely.”

“Oh.” You wondered if you were imagining the disappointment on Colin’s face.

Taking a deep breath, you pushed on. “I just realised I’d rather be here.”

Colin nodded. “With Daisy,” he supplied. You took a gulp of your water, and then set it down on the counter.

“With Daisy,” you agreed, looking down at where your hand was resting on the counter. “But not just Daisy.” You closed your eyes, like you were bracing for impact.

“Wh- What do you mean not just Daisy?”

You turned to look at him again, and he was standing closer. If you reached out in front of you, you could touch him.

“I’d rather be here with you.”

Colin’s mouth opened, but no words came out. His cheeks were flushed pink. You stood there, leaning back against the counter as you waited for him to respond.

“Y/N, I… These last few months…” He cleared his throat. “Spending time with you is the most fun I’ve had in a long time. Knowing you and Daisy has been the best thing that ever happened to me.”

You stepped towards him. There were inches between you now, so close, but not quite touching.

“I feel the same,” you said quietly. Tentatively, you reached out and took his hand. With a gentle tug, he pulled you towards him and kissed you. Your arms instinctively wrapped around his neck, and his went to your waist.

He backed you up against the kitchen counter, never breaking the kiss.

“Colin,” you gasped, and he leant forward to kiss your neck. He kissed and nibbled and sucked on the skin there, leaving you panting. Eventually, you pushed him away gently with both hands on his chest. “Bedroom?”

“Lead the way,” he said, releasing you from where you were trapped against the kitchen counter. You grabbed his hand and pulled him along behind you.

As soon as you were inside your bedroom with the door shut, you pushed him up against it, kissing his neck. You had to stand on tiptoes to do it, so you held onto his shoulders for support. His hand slid from your waist down to your ass, squeezing you through your dress.

“Colin,” you groaned, pressing your body against his as much as you could. “Touch me, please.”

His hand came to rest on your bare thigh, sliding up under your dress, up until he was cupping your ass. His fingers slipped past the waistband of your panties, and the feeling of his hand against your bare buttock was almost too much.

“I’ve wanted to do this for so long,” you murmured, leaning back a little to look him in the eyes.

“How long?” he asked, cupping your face with his spare hand.

“Since the first time I saw you holding Daisy in your arms,” you admitted. “You were just so sweet and caring and Daisy adores you. And then you looked at me with those eyes and I realised that I wanted you.”

“Why didn’t you say something?”

“I thought… I thought you… you and Mare…” To your surprise, he started to laugh. “What’s so funny?”

“Sure, when I first moved here, I had a crush on Mare,” he said slowly. You fought every instinct to pull away from him there. “And I still have a lot of respect for her, as a colleague and as a friend. But there’s nothing between me and her. You’re the one I’m interested in, Y/N.”

“Really?” You were looking up at him through your eyelashes, trying to gauge if there were still feelings there for Mare.

“Let me show you,” he murmured, and then guided you back to the bed. As you sat curiously on the edge of the bed, he sank to his knees in front of you. “Let me take care of you, baby.” You nodded fervently.

He lifted your leg and began to kiss your calf. He slipped off your shoe, and then kissed your foot. You giggled a little as it tickled. Then he moved to the other side and repeated the same process.

He kept kissing up your leg, higher and higher until he had to fold up your dress to get to where he needed to be. He stopped at the top of your thighs, straightening up to kiss you again. His hands found the zipper on the back of your dress, sliding it down and then helping you shimmy out of it.

Sitting there in just your panties and bra, you felt exposed, but Colin was looking at you like you were a sunrise. He kissed your neck as he unhooked your bra and pulled it off of you. His eyes widened as your breasts were freed.

“Fuck, you’re so pretty, baby,” he said, and leant in to kiss them. You hadn’t slept with anyone since Daisy was born, and every touch, every kiss, every lick felt so much more potent, setting fire to your skin.

He licked over both of your nipples, watching the way they hardened under his ministrations. You squirmed beneath him, lying back against the duvet and letting the sensations wash over you.

He kissed his way down your tummy to just above the waistband of your panties. You trembled. This was the part of your body that you were most self-conscious about. You looked different to how you had before pregnancy, and you still hadn’t quite adjusted.

Colin kissed your stretchmarks, smoothing his hands over your thighs to keep you grounded. As his lips crept closer to your core, you couldn’t help but grind up towards him. Finally, he slid his fingers under your waistband and pulled your panties down, leaving you entirely nude.

“Gorgeous,” Colin murmured, and then he licked a strip from your vagina to your clit.

“Colin,” you gasped, threading your fingers through his hair. He moaned, lips pressed against you. His hands came up to spread you open, and then he sank his tongue into you. “Fuck.”

“You taste good,” he said softly, and then swirled his tongue around your clit. Your legs wrapped around him tighter, drawing him in closer. “Can I…” He pressed his middle finger against your entrance, waiting for your response.

“Yes,” you breathed, and he slid his finger inside you. “Mmmm, Colin.” Gently, he pumped it in and out of you. “More,” you moaned. He obliged, adding a second finger.

His fingers moved inside you, searching for the spot that would make you gasp. His fingers grazed over it, and your pussy clenched.

“There. Right there,” you moaned, throwing your head back. Colin began to suck on your clit, hitting your g-spot with every thrust of his fingers. “I’m close.”

He sped up, licking and sucking and fucking you with his fingers faster, and you came, moaning out his name and pulling his hair.

As you lay there, trying to catch your breath, Colin stood up and took off his shirt. His hands rested on the buckle of his belt, looking uncertain. You could see from the bulge in his trousers that he was painfully hard.

You sat up and ran your hand over his crotch, relishing the way he shivered as you did so.

“This all for me?” you asked, batting your eyelashes at him.

“I, uh… I really liked it when you pulled my hair,” he admitted, blushing.

“That’s incredibly hot.” You unbuckled his trousers, pulling them down with his underwear. He kicked them off, and you took his hard cock into your hand, pumping it slowly. You licked the head of his cock, and he swore under his breath.

As you started to take the whole thing into your mouth, he stopped you with a hand on your cheek.

“Baby, as much as I want you to, if you suck my cock right now then I won’t be able to fuck you like you deserve.”

You pulled back and looked up at him coyly. “Oh really? Fuck me like I deserve? What does that mean, exactly?”

“It means I wanna fuck you however you want to be fucked.” A shiver ran down your spine.

“I want to look you in the eyes,” you said, shuffling further back up the bed. “I want you to put my legs over your shoulder and fold me up like an accordion.”

Colin nodded, an excited look in his eyes. “Condoms?”

“There’s probably some in the bathroom cabinet. I’m not sure.”

“I’ll be right back.”

While Colin went to retrieve the condoms, you arranged the pillows underneath you, getting comfortable. He came back with the whole box.

“Somebody’s optimistic,” you said, and he flushed pink again, starting to stutter out an apology, but you interrupted. “I like it. Now come over here and fuck me.”

“Yes, ma’am,” he said, climbing onto the bed and crawling on top of you. He slipped a condom onto his cock, pumping it slowly as he lined himself up with your entrance. You draped your legs lazily over his shoulders, watching the expression of concentration on his face.

When he pressed himself inside of you, you felt like a puzzle piece being snapped into place. Colin bit his lip, eyes closed in obvious pleasure as he got used to the feeling of being inside you. When you’d adjusted to his size, you carded your fingers through his hair, and he opened his eyes again.

His expression was bright and earnest and warm, and you pulled him in for a kiss. As you slipped your tongue into his mouth, he started to thrust in and out of you. Each thrust caught against your g-spot, dragging breathless moans from inside of you.

He buried his face in your neck, feeling you tremble and shiver as your orgasm approached. You slipped a hand between you, rubbing at your clit, and he bit your neck softly, and you came, your eyes rolling back into your head.

“Fuck, fuck, baby, you feel so good,” he gasped, as you clenched around him. You tugged on his hair, pulling his face back to look you in the eyes.

“Come for me, baby,” you whispered, and his eyes fell closed. His thrusts sped up momentarily, and the only sounds in the room were the slapping of flesh on flesh, and his ragged breathing. When he had come, he pressed his forehead against yours.

“That was incredible,” he said softly. You leant up, kissing his lips.

“Stay the night?” you asked.

“Of course.”

*

At some point during the night, you awoke alone. You sat up in bed, wondering if you’d dreamt it. But no, there were Colin’s trousers and shirt in a crumpled pile on the floor.

As you slipped on your dressing gown, you noticed that the baby monitor you kept on your bedside table was gone too.

Curious, you walked into the kitchen. The door to Daisy’s room was ajar, and you could see a soft light filtering out through the doorway.

As quietly as you could, you pushed open Daisy’s bedroom door. There, standing next to her crib with his back to you, was Colin.

“Colin?” you called out to him as quietly as you could, and he turned to look at you. His face broke into a dazzling smile when he saw you. He was dressed in the sweatpants and t-shirt he’d brought to sleep in.

In his arms was Daisy. She was snuggled against his chest, eyes mostly closed. Colin put his finger to his lips, and then gently lowered her into the crib. She didn’t stir as he tucked her in and then kissed her forehead. Your heart swelled.

He grabbed the baby monitor, which was on top of a chest of drawers, and led you out of the room. You watched him shut the door as quietly as he could.

“She woke up crying,” he whispered. “I heard her on the baby monitor. You looked so peaceful, I didn’t want to wake you up, so I went to check on her.”

Wordlessly, you gripped the front of Colin’s shirt and pulled him towards you. His arms wrapped around you instinctively, and you rested your head on his chest. He stroked your hair.

“Colin…” you said quietly.

“Yeah?”

“I think I’m falling in love with you.”

Colin pulled back, cupping your face. You looked up into his eyes. His expression was affectionate, sweet, maybe even loving.

“Y/N, I feel the same way.”

You kissed him, holding him close. You never wanted to let go.

--

Notes:

“Hey kiddo! Bedtime!” Peter called down the hallway. He waited, silence.

“You’re not in bed yet! I’m gonna have to tickle ya to sleep if ya don’t get moving!”

Still nothing—except the faint sound of a stifled giggle. Peter’s lips twitched into a smile.

Game on.

He leisurely made his way down the hall, towards the living room, passing Luna’s bedroom door without sparing a glance.

“Huh, that’s weird,” he wondered out loud, playing it up.

“Where’s my kid? I swear I had one, like, five minutes ago.”

Peter exaggerated his search, peeking behind the curtains and glancing under the furniture. More giggles, and he nearly broke character with his own grin. He then made a big show of scratching his head in faux puzzlement.

“Nope, no kid here. Oh well,” he sighed dramatically. “Hmm, could’ve sworn I heard something. Maybe it’s a mouse. Or a cookie thief…”

At that, Luna couldn’t hold it in any longer. She popped out from behind the armchair.

“Noooo! Daddy, I’m here!” she squealed, bursting into laughter. Peter spun around, feigning surprise. “There you are! Thought I’d have to call the FBI or somethin’!”

Squealing with delight, the five-year-old bolted down the hallway as fast as her little legs could carry her. Peter was on her in an instant, zooming past you with a playful wink before scooping her up into his arms, spinning her through the air.

“You’re getting too fast for me, kiddo,” he grunted, as he carried her towards her bedroom, the little girl squirming in his grasp and laughing hysterically.

You leaned against the doorway, amused by the back-and-forth that had become so routine.

“Peter, you’re supposed to be calming her down, not winding her up.”

“I’m working on it,” he called back, depositing his daughter onto her bed and tucking the blanket around her.

“Fine, but when she’s bouncing off the walls at midnight, you’re the one getting up with her.”

Peter shot you a smirk, showing that he knew exactly what he was doing. He reached down and ruffled Luna’s hair, earning another giggle from her,

“Alright, peanut. Let’s make a deal. One more story—only one—Deal?”

Luna’s eyes lit up, and she bounced in her bed. “Deal!”

“Peter,” you reminded him, stepping into the room with a raised eyebrow, “you said ‘one more story’ three stories ago. She’s going to be up all night at this rate.”

Your husband grinned innocently.

“C’mon, what’s one more story? Just gotta make sure she’s really tired.”

He turned toward the bookshelf, fingers dancing over the colorful spines.

“Which one are we reading tonight? Something super long, I bet.”

She giggled, pointing at a well-worn book. “That one, Daddy!”

He picked it up, settling onto the edge of the bed as Luna snuggled under the blankets. “Alright, one loooong story, but then it’s off to dreamland. Yeah?”

•••

After Luna was sound asleep in her bed, and you’ve done your playful striptease, it was time for you to free Peter from his jeans. In the process of removing his belt, your fingers accidentally brushed the strain in his crotch.

“Mghmm… careful there babe.”

He inhaled sharply, and you indulged in the temptation, gently rubbing him through the denim with your left hand while unbuckling his belt and pulling down the zipper with your right.

His body pressed against yours, and you felt the soft push as the back of your legs met the edge of the mattress. With a smirk, Peter wrapped his arms around your waist, lifting you effortlessly. You let out a delighted squeal, soft giggles filling the space between kisses as your fingers clung to his shoulders for support. Instinctively, you wrapped your legs around his waist as he carried you to the bed, feeling the heat of his cock press against your abdomen.

“Please, Peter. I want you, so bad.”

And that was all your husband needed to hear. He laid you gently on the mattress before crawling forward, positioning himself to settle between your legs. Breathlessly, you gripped his shoulders and lifted your hips slightly, moving in sync with him as he lined himself up. Peter began to slowly ease himself into you, groaning into your shoulder, warm puffs of his breath tickling your skin.

He paused for a moment for you to adjust, before pushing further until he was fully sheathed inside you. The delicious stretch of your pussy was nothing short of glorious.

“Oh god… Nghmm — Peter,”

You whined, tightening your grip and leaving crescent-shaped marks on his skin as he started moving. He slowed down mid-thrust to mumble against your cheek,

“Love you too baby,”

Peter rested his chin on your shoulder, placing hot kisses along the column of your throat as he moved, He shifted his hips to find a better angle, and you gasped when you felt his tip nudge against your cervix. Your spine arched and your heels dug into his back as he thrust into with such force that your body slid a few inches towards the headboard, the sheets creasing around you.

“A-ahhh— fuck–”

A strained moan tumbled from his lips when he sheathed himself to the hilt. You can tell by the vein popping on Peter’s neck that he wanted to lower his head, but he was fighting every instinct to keep his eyes focused on you, chocolate irises fixated as you both begin to ascend towards the precipice.

The sight of him, biting his lips and brows furrowed in such concentration made the hot coil in your belly tighten. Supporting his weight on one elbow, Peter slipped his other hand down between your legs, and his fingers—those magical fingers started working your clit almost frantically.

“Please— ohmygod, Peter,”

you babbled, clenching your quivering thighs and throwing your head back when he bottomed out once again. His tip was pressed snugly against your cervix, and you swore you could feel him poke into your stomach, but that did nothing but stir your body into overdrive. You heels dug into his backside, anchoring him as the familiar warmth of his come spurted into your womb. Instinctively, the walls of your pussy clamped tightly around his cock, milking him dry.

“C’mon, baby,” Peter mumbled as he leaned down to give you a quick peck on the mouth, “wan’ you to cum for me, yeah? Cum all over my cock.”

The few seconds between you seemed to stretch into eternity before the coil finally snapped, waves of intense, white-hot pleasure alight your bloodstream as your pussy convulsed around his cock. You placed your palms to either side of his face, his eyes trying desperately to find a part of you to focus on.

•••

Moonlight streamed in through the window, bathing a silvery glow over your bedroom as you lay tangled up in each other, legs intertwined beneath the sheets. Peter smirked lazily as he traced a finger along your arm.

“Y’know, I think ‘m finally starting to get the hang of this whole ‘normal life’ thing. Not as fast-paced as I’m used to, but it’s not so bad,”

You laughed softly, nestling your head against his bare chest, feeling the steady rise and fall of his breathing.

“You? Normal life? That’s a stretch.”

“Hey, I can be normal,” he defended with a grin, though the glint in his eyes said he didn’t really mind being anything but. “I did the dishes tonight. That counts, right?”

You rolled your eyes but smiled, letting your hand rest on his chest, feeling the warmth of his skin. “You stuffed them into the dishwasher in like a nanosecond. Doesn’t really count when you’re cheating with super speed.”

Peter chuckled, the sound rumbling deep in his chest. “Alright, alright. But I still nailed bedtime. Got Luna to bed without any major disasters—except maybe that story where I gave the dragon a Brooklyn accent. She seemed into it.”

“She loved it,” you agreed, smiling at the memory of their earlier antics.

“You’re good with her, Peter. You’re her hero.”

“Yeah, well, she’s pretty awesome,” he shifted slightly, turning to look down at you, his silver hair tousled against the pillow.

“She’s got you to thank for that.”

You met his gaze, fingers idly tracing patterns on his chest.

“Pretty sure she gets most of that from you. The attitude, the energy. The ‘never staying still for more than a second’ thing.”

He smirked, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “Gotta keep things interesting, right?”

You let out a soft hum of agreement, your lips brushing against his collarbone as you spoke. “Interesting is one way to put it.”

There was a beat of comfortable silence between you, and Peter’s arm wrapped more firmly around your waist, pulling you closer until there was no space between your bodies, just the warmth of his skin against yours. He broke the silence with a quieter, more thoughtful tone. “You ever think about how we got here?”

“Where? In bed?”

“No, seriously,” Peter said, fingers brushing through your hair absentmindedly. “Like, the whole thing. You, me, Luna. I used to think I’d never have something like this. Y’know, slow life, family stuff. Thought I’d always be the guy on the outside, just speedin’ through life.”

You shifted slightly to look up at him, your chin resting on his chest. “What changed?”

He shrugged, his smile softening. “You. You changed everything. Made me realise I didn’t have to run away from it all the time. That maybe I could actually slow down long enough to be a part of something.”

Your heart swelled at his words, and you leaned up to kiss him softly, the gesture full of the affection you felt for him. He kissed you back with the same tenderness, his hand cupping your face gently as he deepened it, the kiss slow and sweet like molasses. When you finally pulled back, Peter’s thumb brushed across your cheek, eyes locked on yours in that concentrated, yet familiar way. “I don’t say it enough, but I’m lucky to have you. You and Luna. You guys are my world.”

You smiled, warmth spreading through you at the sincerity. “We’re lucky to have you too, Peter. Even if you’re still kind of a goof.”

He grinned, silver hair falling into his eyes as he tilted his head. “Gotta keep you guys on your toes somehow.”

You laughed softly, settling back against his chest, letting the steady rhythm of his heartbeat lull you into a peaceful quiet. His arms wrapped around you protectively, his thumb continuing to brush absentmindedly against your skin. For a while, neither of you spoke, just content to be together. But as you felt your eyes growing heavier, Peter’s voice broke the silence one last time, soft and almost sleepy. “Hey, babe,” he mumbled, pressing a lazy kiss to your temple.

“Thanks for making me slow down.”

You smiled against his chest, “Thanks for sticking around.”

He chuckled, his grip tightening around you. “Wouldn’t be anywhere else.”