Delena Forever Ours / July 2 - Two Meeting (1/2)
The night Elena met Damon was a turning point in her life for more reasons than one. It wasn’t just the night her parents died. It was the night she realized she wanted something more from life. Something freeing. She came to realize that there was something sort of unappealing about looking into the future and knowing exactly what laid ahead. A safe future she wasn’t really sure she wanted to begin with.
“I don’t know what I want.”
And then she met Damon. The entire situation of their meeting instantly intrigued her. Because it was out of the ordinary of her very ordinary life.
“Its Mystic Falls, nothing bad ever happens here.”
And she found a certain comfort in that. Which is why she found it so easy to confined in someone she just met. That instant spark. That instant sense of belonging. There was a certain feeling that came with her meeting him. A certain mystery that intrigued her from the moment he mistook her identity. A certain exhilaration that came with the unexpected.
“There was something different about him. Dangerous. But not in the way that scared me. It was exciting.”–“And how did that make you feel?”–
“Like anything was possible.”
And for reasons of his own, he felt that same spark too. Because it took him about half a second to realized she wasn’t Katherine. That she was nothing like Katherine. So, when she opened up to him about having her whole life mapped out, he got a sense of the kind of girl that she was.
“I don’t know what I want.”
“Well, that’s not true, you want what everybody wants.”
“What? A mysterious stranger who has all the answers?”
“Well, lets just say I’ve been around a long time. I’ve learned a few things.”
“So, Damon, Tell me, What is it that I want?”
So, he looks into her eyes like he is reading straight from the depths of her being and tells her.
“You want a love that consumes you. You want passion, and adventure, and even a little danger”
Words that despite forgetting, she would have committed to memory.
“When I’m with him, he just consumes me.”
“Thank you for giving everything I ever wanted. A love the consumes me. Passion. Adventure, There’s nothing more I could have ask for except for it to last forever but it can’t”
He knew exactly what she wanted. Because he wanted to same thing. It’s what he was looking for with Katherine so many years ago. What he was still looking for now. And he saw the future he could possibly have with her. Could possibly give her right then and there.
“Hey look at me, Do you see a future with me? Because that is all I see.
“I saw it the moment I laid my eyes on you , Elena.”
Because Damon is the type of person that revels in the unexpected. And frowns upon other people’s expectations of him.
“And I don’t want to have live up to anyones’s expectations.”
Thus, creating a sort of reckless personality for himself. And its that reckless personality that seeks passion, creates adventure, and can even be dangerous at times. Adding to the reason he knew what he can give her.
“I saw it the moment I laid eyes on you, Elena.”
And serving as proof later on that all the memories Damon was telling her she had forgotten were real.
“And I know that I loved the fact that you were reckless and it probably made me feel very free.
Because she didn’t want to be limited to other people’s expectations of her either. She didn’t want to feel trapped by the expected and what was expected of her. Which is part of the reason why she fell in love with him.
“Being with Damon makes me happy…. When I’m with him… it’s unpredictable…like I’m free.”
She wanted to makes choices of her own. Choices has they unknowingly presented themselves.. And that’s exactly what he did for her from the very start, really. Present her with choices she never expected to make.
“I’d quit cheerleading if I were you. I saw you at practice today, you looked miserable.”
“Things are different this year. Everything that use to matter, doesn’t anymore”
“So don’t let it. Quit. Move on. Problem solved. Ta-da!”
And all the other choices along the way. The choice of disconnecting from reality for five minutes. The choice of seeing her real mother. The choice in fighting for her survival. The choice in giving in to her feelings for him. The choice between him or Stefan. The choice in her first feed. The choice in taking the cure or an eternity with him. The choice of driving to their impending deaths. The choice of compelling it all away.
I find it funny that people say that Damon took away her choices, when in reality, he was the one who created so many for her to make, and made her aware of them from the beginning.
And he still does.The choice of opening the door and letting him in. The choice in wanting her memories back. The choice of confronting those feelings for him that she has inside.
Ironically, the only choice she was never truly able to make for herself was…falling for him.
“And in that moment I loved him. I mean… I didn’t want to. It terrified me. But for that moment, I loved him.”
My point is, from the moment he met her, he had her all figured out because he saw himself in her. And he felt that same spark that she did. And lived from choice to choice like she wanted. So, once again he is presented with a choice. And that night he chose to compel her to forget him.
“I want you get everything your looking for, but right now I want you to forget that this happened, Can’t have people knowing I’m in town yet. Goodnight, Elena”
Some people believe that Damon compelled Elena to find everything she was looking for that night. I don’t. I believe when he compelled her to forget him, he compelled her to forget everything he told her along with it. But if there’s one thing I know for certain, its that feelings aren’t erased when one’s compelled to forget.
“There are things you can erase and you know that.”
And that’s the reason I think that Elena went after what she was looking for. Not because he compelled her to. But because she felt like something was missing. And it was. Because that spark was shaded by the hole that was left from losing her parents. A void that Stefan was able to fill. But that spark she felt on the road that night was only ever felt when she was with Damon. That same intrigue was there the second time they met for her first time. Which is why she always knew that underneath all that apathy Damon portrayed, there’s was something more. Something good. There was that same spark that he felt too.
So she pushed him. She challenged him.
“It matters and you know it.”
“You know, I really think that Damon believes that everything he’s done, every move that he’s made, he’s done for love.”
She presented him with choices.
“Don’t make me regret being your friend.”
“Why don’t you let people see the good in you?”
“And of all the choices I’ve made, this will prove to be the worst one, but I’m not sorry that I’m in love with you.”
When she chose Stefan the night her human life ended. It was because she wasn’t aware of when that spark between her and Damon ignited. And she would confused it with the void that Stefan filled after her parent’s death. So, when she regains that memory. That night on the road full of intrigue in mystery and the unexpected. She realized where that spark between them came from all along. So, after defending herself in the choice she made. She confronts him about it.
“I remember everything. The highlight of my transition… remembering everything you compelled me to forget. Like how you and I met first. You were a stranger that told me you wanted me to get everything I wanted in life. Damon, Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Would it have made a difference?”
And she stays silent. Because she honestly wouldn’t know. But to answer his question. It wouldn’t have. Taking that question as not just being about choosing Stefan, whether he ever told her, or never compelled her to forget in the first place. That spark between them wouldn’t have been affected. So, no… It wouldn’t have made a difference.
They still fell in love with each other eventually.
She had herself forget ever loving him.
That didn’t matter either.
They’re still in love with each other even now.
Because despite all the odds that were against them.
They still ended up where they are suppose to be,
“But the wind, yes, the wind,
keeps pushing you to me.”
