Should you kiss your homie?
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Should you kiss your homie?
Watch the new episode now on Dropout

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one of my creative writing professors once said that to evaluate a work as good or not, first you ask what the work is attempting to do, and then you evaluate how well it does it. and this is how to judge everything from critical essays to romance novels to snack packaging to theory tracts.
everyone has a ship thats just: theyre perfect. they hate each other. theyre married. they havent spoken in 15 years. they have date nights three times a week. theyre divorced. theyre pining, its unrequited. its requited. theyre starcrossed. theyre meant to be. theyre doomed by the narrative. they love each other. theyve never held hands. they wont stop making out at parties. they cant look each other in the eye
Don't you forget about Diane
Don't you forget about your friend Jeff
Don't you forget that Hugh will die

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i was talking to people who went to the jimmy fallon filming outside of my ritual and they were telling me about how awkward it was for the band. for so long the ghouls were just standing right off the side of the “stage” and just. hovering and waiting for their cue to gear up. they did one take of lachryma and the crew was SILENT no one gave anyone in the band any sort of signal so v turned to dew after the long moment of nothing and said “did we shit the bed?” but his mic was ON and it filled the whole studio. i have not stopped replaying this in my head since it was told to me. did we shit the bed. dewdrop did we shit the bed.
During Cirice as Dew and Phantom had hot guitarist sex faced each other while playing the intro, Rain was jacking off his bass. And then wiped his hand on his face before shaking off his fingers.
The fic practically writes itself at that point.
ghouls night out headcanons🪩
you asked (no you didn’t) so i responded (sorry) - here’re my half-baked headcanons for our favourite demon musicians/ethereal hell creatures on a mad one
this is heavily influenced by clubbing in the uk because a) i am british (sorry) and b) i love clubbing so pls lmk if this is incomprehensible
ENJOY RESPONSIBLY
i’ve said this before but i’ll say it again: swiss is ABSOLUTELY the one who brings questionable sunglasses to the club and forces everyone in the group to wear them at some point or another. this ghoul LIVES for the cheesy music room in the club (swiss cheese joke ding ding ding) because he somehow knows every lyric, but you just know he’ll throw it back for absolutely anything with a beat. 11/10 icon who’s somehow incredibly photogenic in star-shaped sunglasses
we know aether has BDE (big dad energy) but i feel like it’s off the CHARTS on a night out - from keeping track of how much everyone has been drinking to making constant trips to the bar to get water for the liability of the group, he’s the real angel of the evening (he’ll herd the ghouls home as well when the uber he booked doesn’t turn up). also can chug a pint faster than any other ghoul. 12/10 literal guardian angel demon who is the only one holding this night out together damn it!!
rain is the aforementioned liability. he’s the friend who is too proud to admit they’re a lightweight (even when they’ve fallen arse over tit outside the club), he’s the friend you have to physically restrain to convince the bouncer he should be allowed in. he’s also the friend that has the BEST vibes at the afters because he’s finally reached a sensible level of drunk. 11/10 he might need a tacky c (don’t even ask) but he’s got the best stories for the morning-after debrief
mountain is the self-proclaimed munchies aficionado. a comforting, looming presence as the group dances the night away, he’s almost always got his mind half on which kebab van/chip shop is nearest (and best value for money). he enjoys a boogie as much as any ghoul, but really comes into his own as they stumble out into the night and guides the ghoul gang (ghang) towards the best places for scran like a chippie lighthouse. 11/10 will flirt shamelessly with the kebab shop owners for free chips
short king of the pre-drinks is dew. possessing an apparently infinite knowledge of drinking games (thunderstruck is his favourite with ring of fire a close second) and an endlessly specific range of playlists, he’s the real mvp of making sure everyone heads to the club on the best possible square level. he’s definitely a big fan of squadka (equal parts squash, water, and vodka - it’s a british thing sorry but it’s very dew) and will tell you at LENGTH why it’s the best pre-drink (‘you get hydrated AND blackout drunk, what’s not to love?’) 12/10 mixes terrifying drinks but will have you on the square AND on the level by the time you reach the club
everyone knows you need that one friend who isn’t afraid to scrap on a night out. no surprise here it’s cirrus - if a creep comes anywhere near one of the group she’s there with a well-placed elbow to the diaphragm and a snarled threat of worse. she’s also not afraid to argue with bouncers but the ghouls will attest that sometimes SHE needs an elbow in the ribs and a muffled ‘please stop arguing we’re trying to charm our way inside’. 12/10 has always got your back and is ready to throw hands (and drinks)
cumulus is the ceo of the club bathroom. ghouls travel in packs when loo trips are concerned - whether it’s at the pre-drinks or in the club, cumulus has you covered. armed with a tiny folding hairbrush to fit in her bag, powder to fix your makeup, and the smallest bottle of tropical-scented bodyspray you’ve ever seen, she’s always dead-set on making sure everyone feels their best when they’re throwing it back (swisstopher i’m looking at you) on the light-up dancefloor. 12/10 will tell you if your eyeliner has smudged and always has a hairband on her wrist for when the club gets sweaty
our beloved sunshine is the unofficial club photographer of the group. she will SOMEHOW make you look sexy n candid even if you’re in the grimiest club in town with your eyeliner halfway down your cheeks. a big fan of ‘paying it forward’, she’s the first to buy rounds of drinks, appearing from nowhere with eight bottles miraculously clasped between her claws. 11/10 documents all the highs and lows of the night for the ghang to laugh at as they suffer through their hangovers (it’s mostly pictures of rain falling over)
always nice to put my questionable decisions field research into practice! hope you enjoyed ghesties
i love that discord doesn't tell you if someone's read your messages. like genuinely. normalize others not needing every second of your time right away. normalize taking time to formulate a proper answer. normalize this.
Teratophiliacs were once a niche group that bonded over their sexual attraction to monsters in obscure forums. Now—as online communities pro
Okay guys, we’ve got to wrap it up now with the monsterfucking and find something new to do. It’s getting write-ups in GQ, it’s so over.
Sometimes, in their obsession with monsters, humans end up finding other humans. In 2019, Cachét developed a crush on Salad Fingers, the main character in a British cult web cartoon. She drew porn of Salad Fingers and sent it to David Firth, the show’s creator. Firth loved it and followed her back. “He thought I was a guy because no girl would draw porn of Salad Fingers,” Cachét says.
They started messaging. Cachét complimented his drawing of a human-bug threesome and asked for a print. Three years later, Cachét and David got married. The human-bug threesome drawing hangs on the wall of their home.
Okay this does kind of rule though.

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Thought you guys might appreciate this messy sketch of Father Emulator Third Edition™️ protecting his Smelly Corpse Boi
holy shit thank yo u
Kate Bush as a Bat for “Breathing” her 1980 single.
Photographer: John Carder Bush
worship and violence both require your devotion
In conversation with multiple posts going around discussing technical literacy and typing skills…
I HAD typing classes: my typing speed is less than 35 Words Per Minute
I did NOT have typing classes: my typing speed is less than 35 WPM
I HAD typing classes: my typing speed is 36-45 WPM
I did NOT have typing classes: my typing speed is 36-45 WPM
I HAD typing classes: my typing speed is 46-55 WPM
I did NOT have typing classes: my typing speed is 46-55 WPM
I HAD typing classes: my typing speed is 56-69 WPM
I did NOT have typing classes: my typing speed is 56-69 WPM
I HAD typing classes: my typing speed is faster than 70 WPM
I did NOT have typing classes: my typing speed is faster than 70 WPM
I'm on mobile/ vanilla extract option
➡️ Take a typing test here (and you need an actual, physical keyboard for this):
The industry-standard benchmark used by employers and typing certifications worldwide.
➡️ 'Typing classes' refers to computer skills classes you might have had in school; you can also count games or other related typing training your parents might have had you do.
➡️ Across 3 different typing test websites*, the (english language) world average typing speed is 40 WPM.
*typingtest.now, typingtestgo.com, typerworld.com
Me n the mutuals

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Daily Dose of Daddy Secondo
🖤
I like to think that's how he calls people in a crowd.
Like a mating call, perhaps. Who can resist the haunting sound of the mating kazoo?