I am a SuperFood.

the fact that i am constantly saying strange and unpleasant things is just part of my charm

saying “how can you be sad when people have it so much worse than you” is as ridiculous as “how can you be happy when people have it so much better than you”

*me, owning a strange boutique housegoods/book store selling a variety of mystic, occult objects but no one realizes I live there, this is literally my living room*

10 bucks

15% discount for 3 or more

40 bucks but never attempt to read or open it

Oh that? Just take it. Take it far far away and do not allow it to return

$29.99. Just be careful not to leave the candles burning at night, the gremlin comes alive and likes to wander around and go through your stuff

the chair chooses its owner. sit down and see if it likes you

Excuse me that’s my great-uncle, he is family

that’s not a sale item, that’s my dang lunch

OH GODS YOU’VE SET THEM LOOSE