come what may, I know the way

Kai hadn't stopped thinking about the playlist Tia had given him since he got it. He had to admit, they had very different tastes in music, and it took him a while to really get into Patsy Cline and Kacey Musgraves, but once he started listening to the lyrics, he couldn't help but feel there was a theme. A theme of lost love, of longing, of second chances...And he didn't want to read too far into it, but he knew Tia wasn't one to do anything by accident. So when he received an invitation to her party in the rest of the gifts she'd sent to his cottage for his birthday, Kai figured the least he could do was show up. He was technically "in" the @ pack, and had been since it began, but he wasn't much of a partier and she knew that, so he rarely actually showed. This would be maybe his third time -- and it helped that the theme was something he could get behind. Suspenders stretched taut across his chest, bowtie tied tightly around his neck, trousers fitted...Kai felt like he looked good. Good enough to not leave this place heartbroken? He didn't know. The atmosphere was very reminiscent of the 1920s themed prom where they'd first said their I Love Yous and traded virginities, and that...kind of felt like a sign. He'd even worn the ankle bracelet she'd gotten him two birthdays ago as kind of a good luck charm. But luckily, he gave her the one (1) gift of wearing pants that covered his ankles, tonight, so hopefully no one would notice and call him out on it. Kai scanned the crowd while sipping his 'TiaTini', having not spotted the birthday girl since he arrived. But then, the crowd parted and Tia emerged almost in slow motion. Obviously dressed perfectly to theme, and laughing alongside Izzie and Freddie. Kai had been so taken aback by the vision, he'd stopped mid-sip and almost spilled the pink cocktail onto his shoes. "Shit," he muttered to himself as he dodged the drip and, no doubt, drew attention to himself. He gave Tia, who'd definitely noticed him by now, a small wave as he started to walk over to her.

Tia was almost certain that Kai wasn't going to show up at her party. After Waltfest and New Year's he had absolutely no reason to show up now that a while she'd finally pulled her butt out of her head and actually tried to get him back. Which was fine, she supposed. He tried to fight for her and now it was gonna be her turn to try to fight for him. Probably. But she wasn't going to let that bother her that night, she'd already cast out her first "green light" in the form of her playlist and party invitation, so she just planned to really worry about the rest later. Her birthday was going to be spent being the belle of the ball and having the most fun with the people that actually showed up. So she was fully taken off guard when in the middle of joking with Izzie and Freddie about how Sage wouldn't have to let strange men pet her hair for booze anymore, Kai pulled her attention by nearly making a mess. Instantly forgetting about what she was doing, Tia returned Kai's wave and forced herself to walk and not run up to him. "I can't believe you actually showed up, hi."

Kai shrugged at Tia's words once she met him halfway. "Me? Not show up? Never," he shook his head and tried to remain cool as he sipped his TiaTini this time. "I mean...I know I'm not exactly the member of the @ pack with a perfect attendance record, but...this is your birthday. Twenty-one! So of course I had to come. Happy birthday." Kai shoved a hand into his pocket and nearly ripped out the inner lining as he internally fought with himself on what to say next. "And I had to thank you in person for my awesome birthday presents, too. I've been listening to the playlist on repeat. And, as always, the cupcake was delicious. You always know exactly what to get."

Tia grinned in response to Kai's statement and fiddled with the long string of pearls around her neck as she nervously waited to see if he'd say anything about her not exactly subtle playlist. Getting rejected on her birthday would be a pretty shocking new low after all. "Well I'm glad you could make it! Thank you" Ordinarily Tia would've finished the thanks with a hug, but since Tia didn't really couldn't guess where the conversation would even go, she just stood there only kind of awkwardly. "You're welcome, it was no problem really. You're officially in the double digits club now so I had to make you something cool. And like...from the heart specifically. "

Kai furrowed his brow as he really thought about 'the double digits club'. "I -- " he started to correct, her, but just let himself chuckle it off. "Thanks. It's so weird to think that I'm twenty now. And you're twenty-one. It feels like just yesterday we were baking in the home ec. room." He rolled his eyes but smiled with fondness all the same at the memory. "But you mean that? The playlist was from the heart?" He tried to make it sound like not a huge deal, but he was trying to gauge if the non-subtlety of it all was....intentional. Or just another 'Tia putting children's music on a sex playlist' thing. "Cause I really took it to heart. Just...thought you should know....that." He shrugged, living in the vagueness of it all just a little too much, he was sure. But after so many past rejections, he couldn't bring himself to be more blunt.

Tia joined the chat 15 hours ago

Tia let out a soft laugh at the memory of Home Ec and how wild it was that time was passing so quickly. "I know right? We're so old now! And of course I mean that. My whole entire heart is still in love with you and misses you and that's what most of the songs were about." Tia admitted, grimacing slightly as she fought all her instincts to beat around the bush, Kai had been the clearest ever with her when he tried to get her back, so she absolutely owed him the same.

Kai cocked a brow. Well, that came out easier than he'd expected...and it didn't hit his ear the way he'd expected, either. He came not exactly on the mission of winning Tia back, but with the idea in the back of his head...why didn't it feel as good as he'd hoped? Maybe because he was still jaded from the last two times that he'd tried to make this happen, maybe because now he knew that this was how she'd felt all along, and yet she still let him go through those rejections. Made him go through those rejections. But now that she was ready, he was supposed to leave all that behind? Which he was fully prepared to do, but he wasn't going to make it as easy as....configuring a playlist. "Wow. That's....interesting," he shrugged. "You had a change of mind almost a year later?" Kai sipped his TiaTini in a very KermitMeme.jpeg way.

Tia 's eyebrows practically shot up to her little bejeweled 20s headband at Kai's reaction to her admission. Even though it was extremely off the cuff and unplanned, she had expected a much more enthusiastic reaction than what she'd gotten. "Well not exactly..." She muttered, instantly less brave than she was only seconds before. "I've always loved you...but like..stuff happened and I..I don't know. Ugh." Really not used to much resistance where getting Kai was concerned, Tia grew visibly frustrated as she tried and failed to figure out how to explain herself.

Kai felt his brow soften as she stammered through an explanation. "Yeah....I don't know either," he shrugged, suddenly feeling more sullen than spiteful. It was always that creeping insecurity of the two of them being fools about a relationship that would never work out in the long run that came creeping up into his brain at the most inopportune moments. "I know where I am emotionally right now, and I know that I'd rather dump this drink on my head than ever hurt you again, but now I've been hurt too. And we like to think we're so much older and mature but like....are we?" He smirked bitterly at not only the situation, but himself. How could he have gotten his hopes up over something that he knew deep down always ended in one of them in pain? "I...I'm gonna have to think about it." But he knew himself -- he knew that he'd think for two seconds, remember there were new boobs involved that he hadn't touched yet, and dive headfirst back into this tornado of a relationship. Still, Kai tried to at least pretend like he was going to mull things over as he turned around to walk away from her, but as he turned a passerby knocked the martini glass out of his hand and onto the ground. "Shit," Kai muttered as he knelt to retrieve it.

Tia bit down hard on her lower lip and tried her best to not tear up or just run away as Kai spoke. She genuinely believed that after really trying her best to be a new chiller person and after seeing him actually stay in one place for like over two years, they really did have a chance to not hurt each other this time, but she didn't really have the words or the courage to actually get that out. So when Kai turned to walk away, she made no moves to stop him. The current state of her eyeliner was much more important to her than something she'd planned on fixing later ANYWAY. She was basically running on some weird kind of autopilot as she bent down to grab the dropped martini glass and only really snapped out of it as the gleam of something gold on Kai's surprisingly mostly covered ankle. Tia forgot all about what she'd been reaching for and instead yanked Kai's pant leg as high as she could get it with them both down on the ground. "What the heck! Is this some kind of joke is this supposed to be?"

Kai tried to tear his pant leg from Tia's grip, not entirely sure why she was holding onto it and nearly making him fall over in the process -- that was, until she lifted it over his ankle bracelet. Oh. Double shit. He quickly stood up and covered up the shame on his ankle. "No one's joking! I wore it...because it's your birthday," he lied. "And I still have it. So I figured it was appropriate to wear to your special Tia-themed shindig with your....Tiana's Place and your TiaTinis and whatever else." He rambled on defensively -- She couldn't know that he had come here fully prepared to admit he was still madly in love with her, just like he'd done. Especially since he put on this whole 'I'll have to think about it' show. "I'm not -- I wasn't...I wasn't hoping for this to happen, if that's what you're implying."

Tia shot up from the ground just seconds after Kai did, crossed her arms against her chest and glared at him as he listened to his explanation. "That's stupid. First of all, my birthday party isn't Tia themed. It's the 20s. I'm pretty sure they didn't have customized ankle bracelets back then. Secondly, I'm not implying anything. Mostly because I'm not super sure I know what that means but also I'm not! You got my playlist and knew how I felt about you for FIVE WHOLE DAYS NOW and even though you apparently don't want me back anymore you wore that anklet here anyway. What is wrong with you!?" She was just barely not screaming at the top of her lungs at this point, since they for sure had to be causing at least a little bit of a scene but she wasn't entirely sure she cared or not. Tia uncrossed her arms and angrily held out one hand to Kai, palm up. "Give me the ankle bracelet back, you apparently have some thinking to do and I'd hate for this to confuse you as much as it's confusing me right now." 

Kai scoffed at her dissecting his perfectly-crafted response, and was about to rebut when she demanded to know what was wrong with him, but was taken off guard when she then demanded he give the ankle bracelet back. "What?! I'm not -- !!!" he started, then realized he sounded a little too passionate and attached to this ankle bracelet. Kai cleared his throat and started the sentence over. "I'm not giving it back, that's crazy. It was a gift. And you can't just make a playlist like that and profess your love for me, when a year ago I tried. Twice! And you broke my heart both times!" He was breaking down now, finally letting his calm and cool facade melt away into the pure sap he felt like every time he was near her. "We started this year off kissing each other, and you left me in a crowd of people like nothing even happened. The worst part about all of this is that I'm not confused! After all that, I still want to be with you more than anything!" It felt like it all came out at once, and Kai's heart pounded behind his ribcage. Emotional vulnerability fucking sucked. "So yeah. That's why I wore this thing, because it's kind of the only hope I have that we can make it. And I'm not giving it back."

Tia 's face flushed a deep shade of angry red as she really considered getting down on her hands and knees to rip the bracelet off his ankle with her bare hands. But that was probably a little too crazy for right then. So instead she buried the idea and kept her hand out for the bracelet as he spoke...but the more he spoke, the thought did creep up again. Especially when he insisted that she'd left him in that crowd like nothing happened. At which point, she finally had to put her hand down and instead began clenching both hands into tight little fists at her sides, ignoring the bite of the nails and rhinestones as they dug into her skin. "Then what did you even need to think about. How to make me feel as bad as you did both of those times when I broke your heart? Newsflash, Aukai, i was fully shattering my own heart at the exact same time. I can't even start to go into how horrible I've felt for a whole actual year straight, but All you're doing right now is making everything take way longer than it needs to just because I'm the stupidest girl alive, and that's even worse."

Kai raised his brows. He didn’t know she felt bad for what she did — from where he stood, she’d rejected him and then went off with two different yet strikingly similar tall and hairy guys. “Well I think the difference here is that...I didn’t know that. You never let me in on the fact that you felt bad — All I saw was you leaving me to go be with Huntley or get stood up on dates by Leo Fitzherbert.” He rolled his eyes at the mere mention of both of those assholes, both of whom had now rejected her in the exact same ways. “I don’t blame you for saying no....both times. I guess,” he shook is head with a sigh. “I’m the stupid one. I’ve fucked up your trust too many times. I can’t blame you.” He toyed with the martini glass in his hand as he struggled to meet Tia’s gaze. “So I don’t have to think anymore. Now what?”

Tia rolled her eyes when Kai said he hadn't known how she felt. Like she didn't struggle with telling him how they felt when they were together and happy. "Like you've never heard of a stupid rebound." She muttered, not at all interested in even hearing the names of those other guys. Still, she ended up letting her clenched fists slacken as Kai talked. Part of the magic of their relationship was that as quickly as he could rile her up, he could usually bring her right back down into being putty in his hands. "Language. But...I don't know, if you don't have to think anymore, what'd you decide?" Tia was pretty sure she knew what he was going to say, but she still couldn't help nervously looking down at the floor before glancing up at him through her lashes

Kai sighed. He'd put the ball in her court, and she tossed it right back into his. Kai shook his head, allowing the feelings he felt coming into the night come back to him. The hopefulness, the butterflies, the need to kiss her. "I decided that I'm not going anywhere." He shrugged, knowing that what he said might sound simple to anyone else, but between them, it meant everything. "And if you'll have me, I'd be so down to give us another try. Hopefully the final try this time." Kai stepped closer to Tia, and oh-so delicately took one of her hands in his, rubbing his thumb across the back.