I know this sounds like the deranged ramblings of a senile old man but I swear it used to be possible to look up information on the internet

the anniversary of library paste man’s death is in four days.

the anniversary of the library paste man’s death is today

Never ever ever eat raw white onion and then smoke cigarette.

The gnomes beat the shit out of you again?

The gnomes beat the shit out of me again.

i am massively overdue for a very very good week where not a single bad thing happens and everything is easy

reblog to give prev a very good week where not a single bad thing happens and everything is easy

having a job is very weird bcos by and large your coworkers will be a variety of ages and you will not all be at the same stage of life. your coworker will be like, well I’m off home to spend time with my husband & child, what are you going to do with your evening? and you’re like, well, I plan on playing Rollercoaster Tycoon for as much as it as possible

And you are older than them

*dirty talking* you’ve been a very bad boy and im just going to straight up kill you now