Its Time

I hate my friends parents, they do so much to make their parents happy but all they can do is complain about how it’s not enough, about how their children should be more like them. I’ve always been so jealous of her for the relationship she had with her parents and now one of them has chosen a girlfriend over her and the other can’t put politics aside. I’m so sorry for everyone that has to deal with that.

It’s always really weird to find out your grandparent or parent were bad people. Like my grandfather emotionally abused my grandmother and my father physically abused my mother, and my family were all either so good at hiding it or my brain shut it away from me that I only recently get to find out about it. It feels like a betrayal but at the same time makes so much of my life make more sense.

I want to post more and maybe reach out and become friends with more ppl but dude that’s so hard lol, I have no idea what to talk about. Do I just talk about my day?

I’m ngl seeing so many pretty butches yearning so hard and not having a girl there to give them what they want makes me sad.. it’s almost like that could be me? 👀

I went to my first therapy appointment today and it was genuinely so strange, like it was hard not to notice how disingenuous it all felt. Like me telling someone that I’m sad and they just go “Mhm, interesting.” Idk I’m sure I just need to go longer but it’s so weird. And after I felt worse lol, cuz like I opened up and told him the bullet points and had to stop before I could get any real relief from talking about it. It felt like being emotionally blue balled lmao