Defining moments

Currently I’m feeling a little incomplete, for lack of a better word. Ten possible reasons why:

- First and foremost, I feel under pressure to get a job and start my career. I feel like everything else will eventually come together once I find one but right now I’m in such an awkward feeling spot in my life.

- I have trouble sticking to one thing I like. I’ll switch between playing guitar, making music, playing Smash, wanting to take pictures, Chinese yoyo, still dancing, whatever, but for some reason can never really dedicating myself and push further than a leisurely hobby.

- I’m starting to miss some of my friends, even though I’m the one who kind of sucks at staying in touch LOL.

- Extension from not having a job: Not having income = the actual need to watch my spending.

- Never having a car in my life, I don’t have the freedom to go to as many places as I’d like. Shout out to Yena for giving me a glimpse though.

- Probably a little homesick from not going back since winter.

- Back to career, a little scared of my future role in the world. I’m glad to have made in impact at UCLA, particularly with Foundations, so now being thrust into an almost completely unfamiliar new segment of life is kind of overwhelming.

- Basically, uncertainty scares the shit out of me.

- I’m low key craving an eye-opening experience. Seemingly everyone and their mothers went to Europe this summer. Traveling would be nice, considering I haven’t done so much, but I feel like I need more than just pictures at landmarks. I would rather immerse myself in a new culture or see something naturally bizarre. Aurora borealis is probably the top of the list.

Cool guy names I would otherwise have/want my kids to have

- Lance

- Virgil

- Chase

- Law

- Miles

- Finn

- Quinn

- Dexter

- Jax

Things about dorm life:

1) Lucky to have had some stellar random roommates. And a resulting best friend.

2) Food. Feast.

3) Thunder calves.. I guess.

4) Thanks to Josh I learned guitar.. and how to play League.

5) The social experience (particularly my second year) was pretty nice.

6) Study lounge allnighters yum.

7) The random stuff that Josh and I would do. Like try to toss quarters into my Chinese yoyo.

8) Unlimited. Food.

9) My bed was actually heaven.

So it’s about time I’ve put my long-neglected journal of sorts back to use. I read that listing down ten ideas related to anything of my choosing every day helps to exercise the idea muscle, so here goes.

1) Jetpacks have been made; what would be cool is if we could fly by mechanically flapping attached wings. Being a bird would be nice. Gravity is a hard thing to overcome.

2) Speaking of gravity --> space, what if we were able to generate oxygen/breathable air in space? That would enable so much more exploratory options.

3) Would it actually be possible to generate food from water a la Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs?

4) Jet powered skates, something akin to how Shadow the Hedgehog runs. I’ve definitely had multiple daydreams jet-skating down roads like so.

5) I’ve had this anime-inspired story about the greatest warrior encountering some major trouble and having his/her self split into different identities, each specializing in some kind of weapon/fighting technique and destined to roam his/her own part of the world with the goal of uniting together again to defeat some ultimate evil. This could definitely be a video game.

6) I want to be alive when teleportation is invented and perfected.

7) I’ve been on quite a mixing spree lately; it’d be cool to be able to directly turn my thoughts into music.

8) What if we could download data into our heads?

9) It’d be pretty cool returning as a director once more.

This is arguably my best composition to date. What makes it better is how it samples on a song I made in 6th grade using Finale Notepad (https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B_TnCSHcEzUpT0NrS2FEN3JZU3c/view?usp=sharing, for comparison).

8Bit - DJKY

Second project since my adoption of LMMS. This program, hand in hand with Audacity, works wonders.

Even though they're not as great as, say, professional level music composers, I low key take pride in my music mixing abilities. It's like the audial analogy to painting; original bare-bones expression of music. 

And the most randomly timed surge of homesickness. Not just for home but for summers that I could literally do nothing all day and still enjoy it. I suppose it's the window view from my room back home, the vastness of Lynbrook's back yard that I guess symbolizes how open everything was. Now I'm just looking at the side of another apartment complex.

It's probably the two summers in a row of class that leaves me feeling like this. Or maybe it's because I haven't been writing. Now that it's August, summer is nearly over and I haven't had much time to enjoy it outside of the occasional weekend excursion. I do miss the carefree-ness of high school and spending every summer prepping for homecoming or just sitting at home lazing around and I probably won't be able to have those moments as often if at all anymore.

Ultimate Brawl XIV - Samahang Modern