fight for your love

June stopped walking for a second. Well, that was a shock. “Both of them?”

“Your mom hugged me,” he said, his tone sounded like he just went through a whole war and was now calling from the frontlines. 

“Dad there?”

“Yeah. Yep. He’s here. He nodded at me.”

“Huh,” June said. 

“Huh.” He mimicked, in her tone, poorly. “I’m out here, dealing with your family reunion, trying to win a rodeo, and that’s all you’re saying?”

“Guess you’re the favorite now, baby,” June said, her tone flippant. 

“I don’t want to be the favorite, I don’t want them here at all.” He sighed. She could almost hear him scrub a hand through his hair, annoyed. Her lips twitched with a smile, because he was really acting like he lost a limb and occasionally Vann’s dramatics made her just grin away.

“You know they came — he came — as his way of saying sorry, showing he supports,” June said, it slowly sinking in. There wasn’t even anything else to watch that her father would have cared about. All the good horse events happened at the beginning of the stock show, and the rodeo was at the end. June wasn’t even singing it. She was still in Iron River until the last of the week. The rodeo was ten days long, and she’d come for the final rounds.  

“I’m gonna lose now,” Vann groaned. “Don’t be alarmed when I call from the ER.”

“Vann, do you want me to fly out tonight instead of tomorrow?” June asked. “I can intervene.”

“No, it’s fine.”

“You’re not gonna lose, you’ll do fine.”

“No, I’m gonna lose now, and he’s gonna be in the stands, and —”

“Baby you are being so dramatic,” June said with a smile. “I can fly down, it’s not a big deal. Especially if you’re hell bent on getting an ER trip and last place.” There was a few more back and forths between them before they exchanged their I love yous, even if Vann’s was clipped with annoyance.

—

Like it always did, there was something of a crowd around her while she clicked around the Dickies arena. Dressed to impress was her usual status, and she was wearing a more casual dress with a worn jean jacket that had Richmond embroidered down the back and little pearls and stitched into the shoulders. She wasn’t really paying attention to the crowd that was snapping photos as she made her way into the stands where she spotted her parents. 

Sneaking up on them, if it was even possible, her father’s eyes went to her and she saw the ghost of the smile. Asking, “What are y’all doing here?” Her voice made her mother’s head turn around and McKenzie beamed at the sight of her daughter. 

“Watching our son in law clean up at this rodeo,” her mom said with a smile. “I hadn’t forgotten how good he is at this.” Her mom seemed to puff out her feather with pride. June bit her lip, because while her father wasn’t a Vann Richmond fan, ever, her mom just adored Vann. McKenzie’s eyes went back to Dalton and then June. “It was your father’s idea.” 

June’s eyes when to her father, who was standing, arms crossed, just watching his daughter and wife chat and then eyes going back to riders warming up. 

“Hey, Daddy,” June said. It was the first time she’d talked to him since their fight last year.

“Hey, Junebug,” he answered back. He paused for a moment and then shifted. “We should probably, go somewhere to talk, June.” His voice was mellow. June nodded. Her father showed up, this was his way of coming to terms with it. 

They started to make their way down into the pits, and June flashed her pass to the security who knew her entirely too well already. Vann was doing his own thing, this was his job and she tended to just come say hello and then leave him be until it was time to be around. “Tried to not bother him much,” her dad said after a minute of walking slowly down through the stock area.

“It was your idea, then?” June asked, her head tilting to look up at her father.

“Yeah,” her father said with a slow drawl. “Saw he was on the bracket, figured I’d come on up here and watch my son in law do what he does.” He paused for a second. “Tried to call him. Wanted to... you know.” Apologize, June thought to herself, even the word was hard to say for her dad. She was looking at her father, and again she was hit over the head with how similar her husband and her father where with holding a grudge and being stubborn about it. 

“He isn’t the type to pick up the phone for people he doesn’t want to talk to,” June said. 

Her father grunted in agreement. 

“Dad, I...” June sighed. “I’m not sure he’s gonna ever forgive you or like you.” Actually, she was sure he wouldn’t, but she was hopeful he might come around in a decade or two.

“Don’t need his forgiveness.” Dalton said and leaned up against a stock fence, looking at some of the bulls. “I do need my daughter’s forgiveness, though. I’ve missed you, Junebug.”

June gave him a look. “You really miss me or did Mom threaten you and complain so much that you’re tired of it.”

Her father coughed a laugh at that, and he nodded, “Both. Even if your mother is always the driving force to makin’ me do things I mostly don’t wanna do, but things that need to be done.” He sighed again, getting more serious. “I don’t want her to miss things... I don’t want to miss things, important things, that are happening in your life because of... a mistake that I did.”

June stayed silent for a long minute. There wasn’t going to be an easy fix to this, or ever a fix. Vann didn’t like and wouldn’t ever forgive her dad. There was nothing that could be done to make that better, and her father wasn’t the type to really consider Vann’s cold indifference toward him as a slight. He liked to not be talked to or be forced into conversation, and he only liked to talk about the ranch, cows, and horses. 

“June,” her father looked at her. Her eyes went back to him instead of staring at a bucking horse. It wasn’t the one Vann drew. 

“Yes?”

“I just want you to be happy,” he said. “I thought I’d know what would make you happy, I thought I was gonna... not make you go through what your mom had to go through with me, but I just want you to be happy. I’m sorry I got into the middle of it. I shoulda... trusted you. You’re like your mother, she’s always been smarter than me.”

June smiled softly. “Thank you, Dad.” 

“You know, he’s uh, he’s pretty damn good at all this,” her dad said with a smile. “Can’t believe you didn’t tell me how good he was at it,” he said with a small smile.

“Oh my god,” June said with a roll of her eyes. “You think he just like, lucked his way into the NFR?”

“I just always thought you were the better half of him, so I just attributed it back to you,” he said with a slight laugh and a shake of his head. 

“He says the same thing, but not when it comes to this. This is all him, I like how he gets when he’s here. He’s happier here, he’s always been ambitious, so he’s just...” June didn’t know how to describe it. Vann needed a goal in front of him, and he was hyper focused on the comeback this year. “He’s just kicking ass,” June said with a laugh.

They had started to walk back toward the arena already. 

“He’s gonna win this thing, I think,” her dad said with a nod. 

She’d barely gotten the door shut when Morgan came bursting through the door. “June,” he said with a grin. “Don’t bother getting undone. We’re going out.”

June paused, she was about to take an earring out. Her eyes drug to the clock. It was the early sort of late. “Where?” she asked.

“Nowhere he’ll be, don’t worry. Got a buddy who has a place.”

June shook her head and swiped her clutch and nodded to the door. “Alright, then.”

“I want to stop at this hole in the wall first.”

She would be overdressed but whatever. Wasn’t like she was in the mood to change, and she could use a drink. She couldn’t shake the sour taste in her mouth from walking by him, a girl under each arm. She looked through him, he winked, and she pretended to not acknowledge his existence — even if she wanted to smack that cowboy hat off his head.

“I could use a drink, Morgan.” She said, her own way of saying hurry up and lead. He paused for a second and dug through her trunk and pulled out a bottle of whiskey. “How’d that get in there?”

“I been stashing shit in your trunks for like a year now.”

“Unbelievable.”

Yet, he was twisting off the cap and taking a slug before he handed it to her. “Incredible night.” June was tipping the bottle back when she remembered that this was technically his first stadium he’s opened for.

She didn’t answer. She was trying to let the whiskey work out the kinks in her mood. The anger. The annoyance. With a hand, Morgan swept around her, steering her with the hand on her back.

—

When the phone rang, she knew who it was. This was the game they played. He’d get drunk, he’d call her, and she’d answer because she always did. He’d call her for other reasons, slurring his words, but it ended in her feeling a type of way, thinking about taking him back, and in the morning she’d be bombarded with photos of him and some random girl and she’d feel stupid.

June was perched on the corner of the billiard table. She liked Morgan’s friends enough. The whiskey was good and tilted it up to her lips. She let it ring a few times before the alcohol and petty had her picking up the phone. “Hello?”

“Hey,” he drawled back. She couldn’t tell if it was loud or not, it was loud in this house. The boys were bullshitting around, singing bar tunes, making up the lyrics. When they sang a line about her, her head snapped to them and she grinned.

“What is it, Vann?” She wasn’t really in the mood for this game he liked to play.

His name got the attention of Morgan, who rolled his eyes. “Hang up the phone,” he shouted, like a middle schooler who shouted hello to your mother when she called.

There was a pause. Whatever Vann was gonna say was caught off guard by other voices. “Thought you looked good.”

“Hang up the damn phone, June,” now his friend joined in.

“Why they telling you to hang up?” Vann asked.

“Everyone saw the display you put on,” June shrugged. “Seems like you ain’t need me, you’re plenty busy with your layovers.”

“June,” Vann started.

“No, Vann, it was a good performance. I’ll enjoy all the photos I get tagged in. I’d say don’t worry about it, but I know you’re not.”

Morgan stood up, and sauntered over to where she was perched. He was drunk too. Sighing, and resting next to her he said, “You ain’t even with him, quit fighting him on the phone. Hang up, and we’ll play some pool.”

“I gotta go,” June said.

“June—“ whatever he was gonna said was cut off with her hanging up.

June’s head felt slow with the whiskey she drank, she looked at Morgan for a long moment and he looked back. “You’ve got him some kind of fucked up, you know.” His drawl was thick when he said it.

“He isn’t losing any sleep,” June shrugged. He wasn’t. He called when he was drunk because that’s what he did. He called. She answered. She didn’t really ever question it. It was just what they did.

“What’s the deal with you when it comes to him?”

“You’re looking at it.” He called, she answered, she felt stupid. What else was new? He had a good way of making her feel dumb, making her feel like he was playing her. She bristled against the thought. It was another chink in the armor, because a week ago she was the drunk one telling him she loved him and him telling her that he would come to her hotel.

Morgan’s hand slipped to the other side of her, his forearm resting against her hip for a moment before his hand went to her hip. It clicked, then, how close he was. Just a tilt of her head, and she could’ve kissed him. June scooted off the table, putting distance there, her stomach lurching. A clear indication of the word no without embarrassing either of them. She shook her head, too, the noise of the house seemed to still. “I’m gonna go back. You enjoy being with your friends. I need to rest my voice.” An excuse, but he wasn’t an asshole so he let her have it.

“Okay, you’ll be safe?”

“Yeah, Denny’s outside waiting anyway.”

“Okay, just... uh, tell me when you’re back?”

“Mhmm,” she said and was already walking out the door. Walking out to the drive and nodded to her driver. “Can you take me back to the hotel, Denny?”

“Of course, ma’am.”

He opened the door for her and she got in, settling into the backseat. The overwhelming sadness hit her then. Tires churned on the road as they drove in silence and June bit her lip, trying to stop the tears from welling up. This wasn’t the first time this happened. It just was something of the nicest way it happened. She something of knew that she was open season since the break up. People she considered to be just friendly, men who she thought were just nice, it was a prelude to them waiting and trying to make a move. Usually it was a little more aggressive, they confused her being nice to liking them and then she was some sort of prize to be had now.

This one hurt a little more. Mostly because she thought he really was a friend. All the fights her and Vann had over him, in particular. How nice he was during the events to her when Vann bailed and she had to go alone. He had seemed respectful and sympathetic, but apparently it seemed like that was just out of respect. Which made him, well, like everyone else. The overwhelming loneliness took stock in her and she started to cry.

Denny looked into the rearview. “Ma’am? Are you alright?”