JayP

Wong Kar-wai's Happy Together is one of my favorite films of all time. It's one of the best LGBTQ+ films of all time. But most importantly is a perfect representation of the pain of starting over, due to a toxic relationship. The fear of failing, not because of the idea of failing, but due to fear of going back to a position in life you hate. The very reason you wanted to start over. This explains why the main character, Yiu-fai (played by Tony Leung) is doing the things he does. Why he's still in a relationship with Po-wing (played by the late great Leslie Cheung), who’s this mentally abusive parasite of a boyfriend, and why he himself contributes to this toxic relationship.

Starting over in Buenos Aires

Yiu-fai and Po-wing are 2 gay men who lived in 90s Hong Kong. They’re relationship isn’t accepted in Hong Kong, so they run away to Argentina, mainly to see the Iguazu Falls. They want to start a new life together not realizing their relationship is too toxic no matter where they go. The getaway doesn’t last long, Po-wing abandons his lover, so Yiu-fai is alone, and he’s trapped in Argentina due to Po-wing spending all their money. He’s trapped in a foreign country, where he knows no one, where the only person he knows is the very person he hates and put in that situation. He finds a boarding house and rents a small room. He picks up a dead end job just to save money so he can go back home.

Starting over with Po-wing

This is easily the most frustrating part of the movie. Yiu-fai’s and Po-wing’s relationship is easily one of the most toxic relationships I’ve seen put on film. Due to Po-wing getting severely injured, Yiu-fai reluctantly accepts Po-wing  back into his life. Po-wing is always trying to restart the relationship with Yiu-fai, and Yiu-fai is always rejecting him. But always allows Po-wing to weasel his way back in his life. Despite Yiu-fai “rejecting” Po-wing, he himself is also guilty of contributing to the toxicity of the relationship. He’s happy Po-wing got assaulted because he can care for him, he admitted he wants Po-wing to stay with him forever, he gets jealous when Po-goes out and parties, he stole Po-wing’s passport so he can never leave. We get glimpses of them being a genuine happy couple, like how Po-wing teaches Yiu-fai how to tango, and it cuts to them tangoing at the boarding house kitchen, alone, as they embrace one another. But that’s about it, we go back to them being volatile to one another.

A clean sleigh, meeting Chang

The relationship between Chang and Yiu-fai, is up to the viewers. You can see it as romantic or platonic, but the film makes it very clear, Chang is the healthiest relationship Yiu-fai has had in a long time. Chang is optimistic, adventurous, and out of the 3 main characters, the most grounded. He picks up on Yiu-fai’s sadness and goes out of his way to befriend him. Yiu-fai, like a lot of damaged people, puts up walls, or he’s just so done with people, he at first makes no attempt to get to know Chang. He eventually warms up to him, and the two bond. Yiu-fai is envious of Chang, because like I said Chang is grounded, he’s adventurous but plans things out accordingly. While Yiu-fai's and Po-wing’s spontaneity caused them to be in the situation they’re in. Chang has a happy family dynamic, while Yiu-fai, as I will explain later on, does not. Chang is happy, while the situation Yiu-fai is in makes him miserable. While he is envious of Chang, he doesn’t resent him, if anything he’s happy to have someone like Chang in his life. So it makes it all the more heartbreaking when Chang has enough money and is off to his next destination. The scene with the tape recorder is heartbreaking. Change gives Yiu-fai a tape recorder, and ask him to say something into it, so he can leave it at the lighthouse at the end of the world. Chang walks away and Yiu-fai just weeps, he’s weeping because he’s going to miss Chang, he’s weeping because that feeling of happiness is gone, he’s weeping because Chang is leaving, while he’s still stuck in Argentina.

Father

 There’s a scene in the movie where Yiu-fai is calling his father. Yiu-fai and his father do not get along, due to Yiu-fai sexuality and the fact he stole from his dad’s friend (yeah Yiu-fai isn’t an angel). We don’t hear anything, but we can assume the phone didn’t go well. Time passes, and Yiu-fai writes his father a letter, apologizing for everything telling his story, and wanting to start over, at least as friends.

The cleansing at the falls

In the end, Yiu-fai realizes he needs to change, he needs to become a better person and improve his life. He lives behind Po-wing, he gets a better job, and eventually he leaves Buenos Aires, but not before he visits the Iguazu Falls. The scene of him staring at the falls, alone, but genuinely smiling, as the water from the falls washes everything away. He heads back to Hong Kong, stopping briefly at Chang’s family food stall, steals a photo of Chang like a weirdos and finally heads back up.

A new start and uncertain future

This gotta be a simulation.

THIS GOTTA BE A SIMULATION!

In the dark night, the ground so cold,

I came to him, baring my soul.

Go to the delta, is what I was told

To meet the man at the crossroads.

He stood in the middle, as if he had planned,

He greeted me with a smile and reached out his hand.

“You come to me, you crossed my lands,

Why do you offer me the soul of a man?”

He heard my story, heard my pleas.

He showed a smile of wicked glee.

“Oh, I'll give you what you want, I agree!

 On one condition, you belong to me.”

The deal was made, my dreams came true,

My status rose, and my wealth only grew.

The man howled “I’ll be watching you,

Every move you make, everything you do.”

He'd follow me, always on my tail

He’d know my every move without fail

But no one saw him beyond the veil

No one saw the hound on my trail.

Then it came. It was time

“Here it is, boy, the end of the line”

His stare brought chills down my spine

It was my own doing, nobody’s fault but mine.

He put his hands on my back

My vision went dim, a fade to black

My life was sealed on those tracks

Dragged to hell by a howling pack

A fool who signed the crossroad pact

What can I say about pro wrestling legend Hayabusa, that hasn’t been said already? If you’re a hardcore fan of professional wrestling, then you should know who Hayabusa is, and how influential he is in the art of professional wrestling. If not then I implore you to do research, YouTube, Dailymotion, or read the beautifully written biography by @BAHUFMW (http://fmwwrestling.us/Hayabusa.html), because he truly knows the history of FMW and Hayabusa.

Japanese wrestling has always had a special place in my heart. Whether it’s the passionate story telling in the ring, the mind blowing but beyond dangerous maneuvers, or the hard hitting strikes they do to one another. It’s the type of wrestling that’s different from the wrestling we see in WWE. Not better, but different, but it was also something I would later find out I prefer. I could talk about 90s All Japan and the 4 Pillars of Heaven or New Japan and their 3 Musketeers. But instead I want to talk about a man who made me realize I was a fan of Japanese wrestling, a man who revolutionized the high flying daredevil style that influenced generations of wrestlers today, someone who I consider a hero, not because he was a wrestler, but because he didn’t allow a career ending, life altering injury slow him down, one of my favorite wrestlers of all time, Eiji Ezaki, also known as, the late great Hayabusa.

I’m not going to give a full biography on Hayabusa, because there’s so much to his story. Instead, I want to give a full essay on what he means to me. The mid-90s was probably a hot time in wrestling outside of America. Okay, just Mexico and Japan, America had some hits and misses, just a lot of misses. Also, this was during the time of tape trading. (Which itself deserves its own essay, just know this was before YouTube, and trading tapes with people was the only way of getting cool international wrestling.) While the 3 Musketeers of New Japan (Keiji Mutoh, Masahiro Chono, and Shinya Hashimoto) and the 4 Pillars of Heaven of All Japan (Mitsuharu Misawa, Kenta Kobashi, Toshiaki Kawada, and Akira Taue) were dominating the main event scene in their respected company in Japan, there was a rise in smaller wrestlers, the junior heavyweights.  The smaller, but agile as hell guys. The guys doing these death-defying maneuvers that mocked gravity. Guys like Jushin Thunder Liger, Ultimo Dragon, Taka Michinoku, The Great Sasuke, and my boy Hayabusa. Not just Japan, Mexico as well, AAA and CMLL were starting to get a lot of buzz, the lucha libre style was starting to make its way worldwide, with the like of Rey Mysterio and Eddie Guerrero being it’s 2 biggest names of the style and the Japanese wrestlers that I named all went to Mexico to learn that lucha style and Hayabusa was no exception.

Before any of those guys went to Mexico to learn the cool flippy high-flying lucha style, they had to learn the basics in Japanese wrestling dojos, which without going into further detail, can be inhuman as fuck. Abuse was common for aspiring wrestling trainees, who were often treated as slaves and less than human. Hayabusa was one of the “luckier” ones. Hayabusa was trained in the FMW (Frontier Martial Arts Wrestling) He did the insane and inhumane of amount (literally 1000) of hindu squats, burpees, and so on. He would train in the afternoon till late at night, but before he would go to bed, he and others would need to clean the dojo, cook for the trainers, clean up after the trainers, going to bed at around 2 AM, getting up at 6 AM to do his day job and he would repeat all of this for some time. Eventually he made his pro debut, had a basic trainee match. But one day he had the opportunity to go to Mexico and learn the high-flying style that would make him a legend. There he would dawn his iconic mask, and come up with the name, Hayabusa.

When Japan was properly introduced to Hayabusa was during the 1st ever Super J-Cup 94. The Super J Cup is a periodically held tournament that showcased some of the best junior heavyweights from all over the world, several promotions, and one of the opening matches was Hayabusa (representing FMW) vs another all-time great, another masked wrestling icon, Jushin Thunder Liger (representing NJPW). In 1994, Liger was one of the biggest stars in the junior heavyweights, and while this show is stacked with junior stars, he was one of the marquees. So out first is Hayabusa, a small little guy with an amazing look, his iconic mask and robe. Then out comes Liger, the star himself, also in his iconic attire. Liger takes off his cape, the bell rings, Hayabusa wanting to make a very good first impression, jumps Liger, spins kick him outside the ring, Hayabusa then runs to the opposite of the ring, hits the ropes, runs, and jumps over the fucking ropes, with his robe still on, soaring through the air like a phoenix, and lands on a daze Liger, thus making a first impression on the Japanese crowd, and giving this show one of it’s most memorable spot. While Hayabusa would go and lose the match, thus dropping out of the tournament, it didn’t matter, Hayabusa was now on the wrestling world’s radar.

Despite debuting in the Super J Cup, which was hosted by New Japan, and getting several offers to jump ship to other wrestling promotions, Hayabusa was loyal to FMW. Frontier Martial Arts Wrestling was part of another big boom in wrestling, deathmatch wrestling. You see there’s hardcore wrestling, where you beat each up with stuff like chairs, trash can lid, kendo sticks, and other blunt objects. Then you have deathmatch wrestling where you use glass, barb-wires, and just basically sharp objects that would make you bleed. Deathmatch wrestling blew up in the 90s, and FMW was the biggest dog in the yard. Again, another topic for another time, just now that it was founded by Atsushi Onita, he was the face of the promotion, and I have very complex feelings for that man. While Onita was the face of FMW, Hayabusa was the heart and soul. Hayabusa not only could do the spectacular high flying maneuvers, but he could also do the insane deathmatch stunts as well, barbed wire matches, explosion matches, exploding barbed wire matches, exploding cage matches, exploding anus matches, and no I won’t explain that last one. His body was riddled with scars, and it made him look so much cooler to me.

But I truly want to get to the point of this piece, why I love this man, why he’s my favorite wrestler, and my hero. Hayabusa opened up a whole new world of wrestling to me. I was a fat child in high school when I discovered who Hayabusa was in the mid-2000s. I was in my hardcore deathmatch wrestling phase, and I just wanted to see more carnage. So, imagine my stupid high schooler mind when I discovered the Onita vs Hayabusa exploding cage match, and me just going down a rabbit hole on this man. Hayabusa was one of the first wrestlers I knew who could do it all in wrestling. Mat work, highflyer, hardcore, charisma, and a great look. He was the perfect package, and I had to learn more about him. I looked for any videos I could find, I scoured the internet about him, I got those shitty FMW Tokyo pop DVDs, I had to learn more about him. Then I learned about this tragic accident.

Hayabusa’s style had its risk, if anything it was all risk. His aerial dives and maneuvers were beyond breathtaking. His iconic phoenix splash, a maneuver he created by the way, was this gravity defying and pure acrobatic feat that got a multiple page article and spot on the news, just google Hayabusa and phoenix splash and you’ll see why it was so cool. He made 450 splashes and moonsaults look like basic moves, he was that agile. But as I said his hybrid style came at a cost; he was riddled with injuries and cuts from all that deathmatch high-flying style he did, and it cost him. On October 22nd, 2001, Hayabusa had a match with Mammoth Sasaki, things were going fine. When Hayabusa dropped Sasaki, he ran to the left side of the ring, jumped on the middle rope, and did what is called a springboard senton. After he landed the senton, he ran to the right side, jumped on the middle rope and attempted to do a springboard moonsault, a move he did so many times, but this went very wrong. Hayabusa has lost his footing and landed on his head, breaking two of his vertebrae, leaving him permanently paralyzed. The ref checks on Hayabusa, meanwhile Sasaki, not knowing what’s going on, is still in character, he’s stomping on Hayabusa, he’s hitting him, the ref is trying to talk to him, Sasaki pushes him away and goes for a headlock. When you watch the video you can tell by Sasaki’s body language, how he registers it, Hayabusa is truly hurt. A bunch of people rut to the ring, commentator and FMW president at the time Shoichi Arai runs to the ring screaming Hayabusa’s name, and just like that the in-ring career of one of wrestling’s greatest, an innovator, and an icon, ends.

Post match and accident, Hayabusa asks for the mic, crying, and addresses the crowd. “All of you I’m truly sorry. It will take a long time to come back, but I want to come back. So please don’t abandon FMW, that I love at the risk of my life” The crowd shouted back, “we will wait for you”. It shows how loyal, and how passionate he was for FMW and the fans. But sadly, there’s no happy ending to FMW. There’s so much that led to the closure of FMW, and so many post-bankruptcy events that I can’t get into, it deserves its own piece. All I can say is Shoichi Arain and Kodo Fuyuki did all that they could, and I hope they rest in peace.

While all of this is happening Hayabusa is lying in a hospital bed, his career is over, his life is absolutely altered, the company he gave his blood, sweat, tears, and body for, is gone, 2 of his colleagues died soon after, and in 2004 he was divorced. This is a lot to handle for anyone, and anyone would’ve crumbled, after all of this, but Hayabusa didn’t. This is where he goes from my favorite wrestler to my hero. Hayabusa did so much post injury, he was an advocate for disabled athletes, he went to elementary schools, talked to kids about never giving up, he sang to the, he went to college philosophy courses and talked about wrestling and how it applied to life, he promoted a new WMF, Wrestling Marvelous Future (the initials being FMW backwards) that show cased up and coming wrestlers, he worked with Dragon Gate (another awesome wrestling company), he starred in a stage play, he started a singing career, there’s a video of him singing “stand by me” online! He did not let his injury stop his life, after everything that happened to him, he didn’t stop. He said one day, he would dawn the mask, and he will walk to the ring, and stand in the middle of the ring one day, and he did.

In 2015, Hayabusa gained some mobility in his leg. With a cane, but mostly without anyone’s help, rose from his wheelchair, slowly walked to the ring with his cane, entered the ring, and stood in the middle of the ring, as fans and his peer cheered on. It’s one of the most emotional moments in wrestling history, and it showed the strength and determination of Hayabusa.

One year later, on March 3rd, 2016, Hayabusa, Eiji Ezaki, one of the most influential wrestlers in the world, my favorite wrestler of all time, passed away. This was the first thing I woke up to, this is how my day started, and it put me in such a stupor all day. Online many wrestlers poured their hearts out and gave their tribute to Hayabusa. When I tell you he was influential I mean it. Hell to this day, once in a while Will Ospreay, one of AEW’s best wrestlers, would don a mask and robe and pay tribute to Hayabusa. Hayabusa’s influence and contribution to the wrestling business can’t be overstated.

What can I say about pro wrestling legend Hayabusa, that hasn’t been said already? If you’re a hardcore fan of professional wrestling, then you should know who Hayabusa is, and how influential he is in the art of professional wrestling. If not then I implore you to do research, YouTube, Dailymotion, or read the beautifully written biography by @BAHUFMW (http://fmwwrestling.us/Hayabusa.html), because he truly knows the history of FMW and Hayabusa.

Japanese wrestling has always had a special place in my heart. Whether it’s the passionate story telling in the ring, the mind blowing but beyond dangerous maneuvers, or the hard hitting strikes they do to one another. It’s the type of wrestling that’s different from the wrestling we see in WWE. Not better, but different, but it was also something I would later find out I prefer. I could talk about 90s All Japan and the 4 Pillars of Heaven or New Japan and their 3 Musketeers. But instead I want to talk about a man who made me realize I was a fan of Japanese wrestling, a man who revolutionized the high flying daredevil style that influenced generations of wrestlers today, someone who I consider a hero, not because he was a wrestler, but because he didn’t allow a career ending, life altering injury slow him down, one of my favorite wrestlers of all time, Eiji Ezaki, also known as, the late great Hayabusa.

I’m not going to give a full biography on Hayabusa, because there’s so much to his story. Instead, I want to give a full essay on what he means to me. The mid-90s was probably a hot time in wrestling outside of America. Okay, just Mexico and Japan, America had some hits and misses, just a lot of misses. Also, this was during the time of tape trading. (Which itself deserves its own essay, just know this was before YouTube, and trading tapes with people was the only way of getting cool international wrestling.) While the 3 Musketeers of New Japan (Keiji Mutoh, Masahiro Chono, and Shinya Hashimoto) and the 4 Pillars of Heaven of All Japan (Mitsuharu Misawa, Kenta Kobashi, Toshiaki Kawada, and Akira Taue) were dominating the main event scene in their respected company in Japan, there was a rise in smaller wrestlers, the junior heavyweights.  The smaller, but agile as hell guys. The guys doing these death-defying maneuvers that mocked gravity. Guys like Jushin Thunder Liger, Ultimo Dragon, Taka Michinoku, The Great Sasuke, and my boy Hayabusa. Not just Japan, Mexico as well, AAA and CMLL were starting to get a lot of buzz, the lucha libre style was starting to make its way worldwide, with the like of Rey Mysterio and Eddie Guerrero being it’s 2 biggest names of the style and the Japanese wrestlers that I named all went to Mexico to learn that lucha style and Hayabusa was no exception.

Before any of those guys went to Mexico to learn the cool flippy high-flying lucha style, they had to learn the basics in Japanese wrestling dojos, which without going into further detail, can be inhuman as fuck. Abuse was common for aspiring wrestling trainees, who were often treated as slaves and less than human. Hayabusa was one of the “luckier” ones. Hayabusa was trained in the FMW (Frontier Martial Arts Wrestling) He did the insane and inhumane of amount (literally 1000) of hindu squats, burpees, and so on. He would train in the afternoon till late at night, but before he would go to bed, he and others would need to clean the dojo, cook for the trainers, clean up after the trainers, going to bed at around 2 AM, getting up at 6 AM to do his day job and he would repeat all of this for some time. Eventually he made his pro debut, had a basic trainee match. But one day he had the opportunity to go to Mexico and learn the high-flying style that would make him a legend. There he would dawn his iconic mask, and come up with the name, Hayabusa.

When Japan was properly introduced to Hayabusa was during the 1st ever Super J-Cup 94. The Super J Cup is a periodically held tournament that showcased some of the best junior heavyweights from all over the world, several promotions, and one of the opening matches was Hayabusa (representing FMW) vs another all-time great, another masked wrestling icon, Jushin Thunder Liger (representing NJPW). In 1994, Liger was one of the biggest stars in the junior heavyweights, and while this show is stacked with junior stars, he was one of the marquees. So out first is Hayabusa, a small little guy with an amazing look, his iconic mask and robe. Then out comes Liger, the star himself, also in his iconic attire. Liger takes off his cape, the bell rings, Hayabusa wanting to make a very good first impression, jumps Liger, spins kick him outside the ring, Hayabusa then runs to the opposite of the ring, hits the ropes, runs, and jumps over the fucking ropes, with his robe still on, soaring through the air like a phoenix, and lands on a daze Liger, thus making a first impression on the Japanese crowd, and giving this show one of it’s most memorable spot. While Hayabusa would go and lose the match, thus dropping out of the tournament, it didn’t matter, Hayabusa was now on the wrestling world’s radar.

Despite debuting in the Super J Cup, which was hosted by New Japan, and getting several offers to jump ship to other wrestling promotions, Hayabusa was loyal to FMW. Frontier Martial Arts Wrestling was part of another big boom in wrestling, deathmatch wrestling. You see there’s hardcore wrestling, where you beat each up with stuff like chairs, trash can lid, kendo sticks, and other blunt objects. Then you have deathmatch wrestling where you use glass, barb-wires, and just basically sharp objects that would make you bleed. Deathmatch wrestling blew up in the 90s, and FMW was the biggest dog in the yard. Again, another topic for another time, just now that it was founded by Atsushi Onita, he was the face of the promotion, and I have very complex feelings for that man. While Onita was the face of FMW, Hayabusa was the heart and soul. Hayabusa not only could do the spectacular high flying maneuvers, but he could also do the insane deathmatch stunts as well, barbed wire matches, explosion matches, exploding barbed wire matches, exploding cage matches, exploding anus matches, and no I won’t explain that last one. His body was riddled with scars, and it made him look so much cooler to me.

But I truly want to get to the point of this piece, why I love this man, why he’s my favorite wrestler, and my hero. Hayabusa opened up a whole new world of wrestling to me. I was a fat child in high school when I discovered who Hayabusa was in the mid-2000s. I was in my hardcore deathmatch wrestling phase, and I just wanted to see more carnage. So, imagine my stupid high schooler mind when I discovered the Onita vs Hayabusa exploding cage match, and me just going down a rabbit hole on this man. Hayabusa was one of the first wrestlers I knew who could do it all in wrestling. Mat work, highflyer, hardcore, charisma, and a great look. He was the perfect package, and I had to learn more about him. I looked for any videos I could find, I scoured the internet about him, I got those shitty FMW Tokyo pop DVDs, I had to learn more about him. Then I learned about this tragic accident.

Hayabusa’s style had its risk, if anything it was all risk. His aerial dives and maneuvers were beyond breathtaking. His iconic phoenix splash, a maneuver he created by the way, was this gravity defying and pure acrobatic feat that got a multiple page article and spot on the news, just google Hayabusa and phoenix splash and you’ll see why it was so cool. He made 450 splashes and moonsaults look like basic moves, he was that agile. But as I said his hybrid style came at a cost; he was riddled with injuries and cuts from all that deathmatch high-flying style he did, and it cost him. On October 22nd, 2001, Hayabusa had a match with Mammoth Sasaki, things were going fine. When Hayabusa dropped Sasaki, he ran to the left side of the ring, jumped on the middle rope, and did what is called a springboard senton. After he landed the senton, he ran to the right side, jumped on the middle rope and attempted to do a springboard moonsault, a move he did so many times, but this went very wrong. Hayabusa has lost his footing and landed on his head, breaking two of his vertebrae, leaving him permanently paralyzed. The ref checks on Hayabusa, meanwhile Sasaki, not knowing what’s going on, is still in character, he’s stomping on Hayabusa, he’s hitting him, the ref is trying to talk to him, Sasaki pushes him away and goes for a headlock. When you watch the video you can tell by Sasaki’s body language, how he registers it, Hayabusa is truly hurt. A bunch of people rut to the ring, commentator and FMW president at the time Shoichi Arai runs to the ring screaming Hayabusa’s name, and just like that the in-ring career of one of wrestling’s greatest, an innovator, and an icon, ends.

Post match and accident, Hayabusa asks for the mic, crying, and addresses the crowd. “All of you I’m truly sorry. It will take a long time to come back, but I want to come back. So please don’t abandon FMW, that I love at the risk of my life” The crowd shouted back, “we will wait for you”. It shows how loyal, and how passionate he was for FMW and the fans. But sadly, there’s no happy ending to FMW. There’s so much that led to the closure of FMW, and so many post-bankruptcy events that I can’t get into, it deserves its own piece. All I can say is Shoichi Arain and Kodo Fuyuki did all that they could, and I hope they rest in peace.

While all of this is happening Hayabusa is lying in a hospital bed, his career is over, his life is absolutely altered, the company he gave his blood, sweat, tears, and body for, is gone, 2 of his colleagues died soon after, and in 2004 he was divorced. This is a lot to handle for anyone, and anyone would’ve crumbled, after all of this, but Hayabusa didn’t. This is where he goes from my favorite wrestler to my hero. Hayabusa did so much post injury, he was an advocate for disabled athletes, he went to elementary schools, talked to kids about never giving up, he sang to the, he went to college philosophy courses and talked about wrestling and how it applied to life, he promoted a new WMF, Wrestling Marvelous Future (the initials being FMW backwards) that show cased up and coming wrestlers, he worked with Dragon Gate (another awesome wrestling company), he starred in a stage play, he started a singing career, there’s a video of him singing “stand by me” online! He did not let his injury stop his life, after everything that happened to him, he didn’t stop. He said one day, he would dawn the mask, and he will walk to the ring, and stand in the middle of the ring one day, and he did.

In 2015, Hayabusa gained some mobility in his leg. With a cane, but mostly without anyone’s help, rose from his wheelchair, slowly walked to the ring with his cane, entered the ring, and stood in the middle of the ring, as fans and his peer cheered on. It’s one of the most emotional moments in wrestling history, and it showed the strength and determination of Hayabusa.

One year later, on March 3rd, 2016, Hayabusa, Eiji Ezaki, one of the most influential wrestlers in the world, my favorite wrestler of all time, passed away. This was the first thing I woke up to, this is how my day started, and it put me in such a stupor all day. Online many wrestlers poured their hearts out and gave their tribute to Hayabusa. When I tell you he was influential I mean it. Hell to this day, once in a while Will Ospreay, one of AEW’s best wrestlers, would don a mask and robe and pay tribute to Hayabusa. Hayabusa’s influence and contribution to the wrestling business can’t be overstated.

         I have several posters of Hayabusa, a weekly pro wrestling magazine who had an issue dedicated to Hayabusa, a mini Hayabusa figure, and a DVD compilation of Hayabusa matches. Pro wrestling will always have a special place in my heart, something I go to when I just want to be entertained, but it’s something that got me through some dark time, and Hayabusa was one of those main drives. Whether it was his aerial prowess, taking a beating, scarring his body, his look and entrance, everything about him just made me feel better. Not only that, but he’s also an example of pulling yourself out of the darkest times. I’ve had bad days, I’ve had bad moments, but all of that pale in comparison to what Hayabusa went through, and he got through those dark times, and showed me I can too. Hayabusa is truly a phoenix, he was paralyzed, but he spread positivity by showing people to never give up. He died, but his legacy is reborn with everyone who was influenced by him. Thank you, Eiji Ezaki.

The fire blazes as team twink Benny  and team sugar daddy Augustus watches the flame dance back and forth. The two were on a small hunting trip to look for a rare stag called a Lucadee Dyr. They hunting it down for the village of New Haven, for a magnificent feast. Despite being rare, the Lucadee Dyr was a vile creature that ate the arms of orphan children. So they're were no qualms of hunting down these beast, and their morbid diet made their meat, rich and fatty.

The two decided to take up this task, to help with the feast and to have a few days away from Vander and Tock for a bit. While they do enjoy their companion’s company the two felt they needed sometime away from them.

“Peaceful isn’t Benny?” Augustus looked over to his twink teammate.  “I guess so, say Augustus, how bout you whip out the bottle of wine from that fellow, Toye Lit. Ya know Toye Lit’s wine” Toye Lit’s wine was the strange concoction of fermented oranges, sugar, and a puree made from tomatoes. The create, Toye Lit, was a former prisoner of the Empire who escaped from prison.

“Sure thing my good man” Augustus takes out the bottle and his rapier and proceeds to slide his rapier across the bottle, top pop open the bottle of “Toye Lit’s Wine”, despite the fact it was screw on top. As Augustus poured some wine into small traveling cups, he noticed Benny massaging his feet. “You alright there Benny” Augustus said with a semi concerned look on his face. “Oh no worries” said Benny “it’s just me feet are tired” Benny tries his best to massage his foot through his boots, but to no avail. “I say Benny just take your boots off”. Benny jolts his head up giving Augustus a dirty look. “No way, I’m not showing you my webbed toes, I already feel insecure thanks to you and Vander”

Augustus sighs and grabs Benny’s ankle and drags him towards him. “oi what are you doing” shrieked Benny. Augustus begins removing Benny’s boots and socks and begins massaging his m̶u̶t̶a̶t̶e̶d̶  foot. While Benny would’ve been offended by this, but for whatever reason, he’s just allowing it. I think Benny’s secretly submissive, but that’s just me. “Augustus, did you cast some sort of spell or something” Benny asking in a puzzling tone. “No Benny, your feet just hurt too much, and you’re probably very submissive, after all you are an archer.”  Benny looks at Augustus and says “yeah you’re probably right.”

Just then Benny jolts up and draws his bow. “Augustus, shhh, I see the Lucadee Dyr.” Augustus, still sitting, turns his head and looks at the direction where Benny is staring at. “Benny I don’t see it” say Augustus trying to grab his bow. “Because the Lucadee is here” says Benny “ as in Lucadeez Nuts” Fin

Monster Of The Week by Michael Sands so far has been my favorite ttrpg system to tell amazing fun and relatable stories. And there’s no better example of that then the actual play podcast, Shrimp and Crits. Set in sunny Gullacochica, Florida, Shrimp and Crits (handsome Keeper Ian) follows rookie Deputy Sara Payne (played by Catie), laid back wild resort businessman Ray Ray Lareux (played by Ryan), and mysterious Agent Ari Greene (played by my hero, Cap). While it does start off as a deal with the monster of the week type of story it later evolves into a much grander plot. Without revealing too much, imagine you were a competent monster hunter, there you go. The cast and Ian created this funny but at times dark and scary story. One minute you’re laughing hysterically at the shenanigans that Cap, Catie, and Ryan have the characters do, along with the witty mind of Keeper Ian, but the same witty mind of Keep Ian will throw in these terrifying moments, and when you least expect it heartwarming and/or tragic moments. But Ian is very subtle about it, he’ll ease you into these moments, sometimes. From themes of toxic relationships, drug use, cults, found family, and finding the best way to solve a problem, Shrimp and Crits is a roller coaster ride of emotions, but often time it’s a fun and silly ride. The chemistry between the cast is absolutely amazing, and is hands down the best part of the show, they work so well off each other, you can tell they’ve known each other for a long time.

Another fun thing about Shrimp and Crits, is the wacky and loveable NPCs that Ian created. Everyone’s good story needs supporting characters, and Ian does his best to make all his NPCs stand out and memorable as possible. From chill homie Rooster to the beautiful but wacky Barb, baby please come back I can do better, I love you! I apologize, I don’t know what came over me. But no story is complete without its villains and again Keeper Ian does a great job making some of them evil as possible, but also complex. One of my favorite villains in the series is the master swordsman, Blue Blood, who plays an important role in the series. But here I am talking about the NPCs and villains when the players themselves done a great job playing the characters. Catie plays through with Sara, is wonderful, the evolution we see Sara go through is one of my favorite arcs in the series. Sara goes from this awkward rookie cop that just got thrown into some major bullshit, to the strong yet caring person. Cap plays the complex but loveable Ari Greene. Ari’s arc is the most emotional, cause at times you love Ari, you get frustrated with Ari, you feel for Ari, and you get disappointed with Ari. Ari does take the role of the leader of sorts and as a realistic leader is flawed, but you know for a fact you can trust them and they will do everything in their power to make sure you get out of that situation in one piece and that’s Ari to a tee. There will be times where you disagree with Ari’s actions, but you can see and understand from his point of view. Ari’s arc is emotional, and at the end of the day, he’s the character you want to hug the tightest and tell him “you’re doing your best and that’s all you need”. Ray is the emotional support 3. Ray is laid back but is hands down the glue that keeps that team together. Ryan as Ray will bring you the laughs, and he will give you the comfort, because that’s who Ray is. While Ari’s actions are questionable, Ray’s actions are pure and from the heart. Ray is always aiming for the RIGHT solution and to protect everyone and everything he loves. But don’t let that fool you, cause Ray Ray can FUCK YOU UP, well they all could, they’re all armed and have special powers. Now I didn’t mention any of the playbooks or what each players users, and that’s because well, Ian has found a way to incorporate the respected playbooks even more into the plot and it’s something you need to witness yourself, also it’ll spoil too much in my opinion.

Season 1 of S&C is a fun and amazing ride, with 67 episodes, a couple of one offs, I highly recommend it. Right now they’re just playing a some mini series that doesn’t have to with S1, for the feed with each cast member DMing and different story, with a different system each mini arc. I've enjoyed all of them and they have been very fun to listen to, hearing the cast DM their own game. But there is a patreon exclusive prequel called Tallahassee Nights.

               On January 17th, 2023, the professional wrestling world lost one half of one of the best tag teams. If anything, indie wrestling lost one of its finest pioneers. If you are a fan of tag team wrestling, hell even AEW, I can safely say Jay Briscoe was an influence on modern tag team wrestling, AEW, and indie wrestling today.

               As someone who grew up watching indie wrestling clips or just trying to find any indie wrestling matches online. I would see names like Bryan Danielson, Trent Acid, Chris Hero, Nigel McGuinness, Homicide, and today’s post, Mark and Jay Briscoe, The Briscoe Brothers. There’s something magical about the 2000s indie scene, it was something you had to experience back then to believe it. If you were tired of mainstream WWE or even TNA, ROH and the indies might have been a scene you loved. And fuck did the Briscoe Brothers set the bar on tag team wrestling. To call Briscoe’s style of wrestling as “hard hitting” would not do it justice. Here’s how I can describe it, think of the toughest person you know, they hit hard, they know they can hit hard, but they also want to be the absolute best, not the toughest, or just the most badass, but the absolute best. The Briscoes were hungry, the hit hard, they flew, the grappled, they set the fucking bar of tag team wrestling. Whether it was FTR, The American Wolves, or Generation Next, The Briscoes could work with any team. CZW, ROH, PWG, GCW, NJPW, or NOAH, The Briscoes won gold.

                 While I love me some Briscoes, Jay Briscoe was a completely different animal. I love Mark Briscoe dearly, but there’s a reason why ROH made Jay Briscoe a world champion. There was fire in Jay Briscoe that can not be matched. A passion, a rage, a beast that was ready to unleash. All you need to do is watch a Jay Briscoe promo, and look into his eyes, and there’s a magnetic force behind it, something trying to draw you in, yet want you to know, “DO NOT FUCK WITH JAY BRISCOE!” While The Briscoes made tag team wrestling a violent art, Jay Briscoe matches is a violent passion. The man made you believe he was in the fight of his life in every single match. While people were hesitant on him winning the ROH title, he showed the wrestling world he deserved it.

                 Another thing about Jay Briscoe that made me admire him more. If he fucked up, he knew he did, and he made every attempt to rectify that wrong. You can’t talk about Jay Briscoe, without talking about the abhorrent thing he said about gay marriage. I bring this up, not to slander Jay, but to show how he matured and changed his views. When word of his passing broke, multiple prominent LGBTQA+ wrestling personalities all spoke highly of Jay, as wrestler and as a man and if you know how LGBTQA+ wrestling personalities are nowadays, there are not afraid to hold their tongue. I like to think Cary Silkin, former owner of ROH, and a openly gay man himself, spoke to Jay when all that happened. All I heard was how much he changed, how opening he was to gay wrestlers, how much he wanted to be leader for all, helping them when ever he can, no matter who, that me showed, Jay Briscoe truly changed, and Jay Briscoe is a wonderful man.

Now that Starship Q has finished season 1, I'd like to give my thoughts on this fun, queer friendly, raunchy as hell, sci fi comedy from Australia. Starship Q is about a crew of mostly non males (Sims, Aurelia, Solaris, Mo, and MUDDA FUCKIN DUSTY) and Bob. Back by the very misogynistic ISA, the Starship Q was sent to do space stuff, and then Earth rudely decided to fuck off and get destroyed. Thanks, auto makers, you fucks. Now as the last remaining humans (allegedly), they must travel the galaxies in search for a new home all the while trying not to offend or kill the other lifeforms in the universe. I love Starship Q, it's fun, raunchy, and entertaining as hell. The cast of Starship Q have great chemistry together, and it’s a show that doesn’t take itself super seriously like a lot of sci fi audio dramas, but there still sweet moments. Aurelia and Sims relationship (they are exes, oof) play such a key role in the show and the comedy. Two vastly different personalities and ideas, clashing (a lot) yet working together (eventually). The rest of the crew are also magnificent personalities. Mo is a horny medical doctor who brings a lot of the raunchy humor, Solaris is the bright-eyed young engineering specialist who’s great at they’re job and tends to fix everything, Dusty the pilot is who we all should inspire to be, and Bob the botanist/chef is trying his hardest, bless his heart. While Aurelia and Sims have great chemistry, I was more drawn by the banters of Dusty and Bob. They don’t spend a lot of time together but when they do it’s hilarious. The main plot of season 1 is mostly them fucking about, trying to find a new home, all while keeping back those sad emotions of losing everyone and everything they loved back on Earth, cause Earth also died. It’s not til the last few episodes of the season where the writers, Lauren Anderson and Meegan May, start implying there’s more to the story and with season 1 leaving us with a cliff hanger, it’s obvious there’s more to the story of the ISA and Earth’s destruction.