Your spiritual walk is not an isolated vacuum-wrapped package that is untouched by the realities of your shifting soul. You’ll get worn down sometimes, you’ll feel alone in faith, you’ll have ups and downs like everyone else, and there will be dry spells, cold seasons, and endless second guessing. Because you’re human. We fall into a rut and it’s all about how we respond to these things.
[…] No real faith is ever lived out in ideal circumstances. When the real world catches up to us and the flames get dampened, we tend to blame ourselves. We think we’ve done something wrong. We think feeling distant from God means God is gone. Really all that’s changed is you’re now trying to make sense of how God is alive in all the areas of your life and how He breathes life into them.
[…]There are entire seasons I’m not sure He’s real and I’m ready to throw the Bible in the trash. Maybe that’s too candid, but I look at our “Bible heroes” and often they skated on the edge too. Their victories were interspersed with so many valleys.
But you know, I keep serving anyway. I keep acting like God exists. I keep loving people. I keep obeying His commands, as far away as they feel. I force myself into the church community. I put my tiny, little shred of faith into His Son. I pray, even if it’s a few words at night. I read Scripture, my heavy head on a pillow as the app shines its tiny little screen into the darkness. And most days, that meager little mustard-seed-faith is just enough.
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