Definitely not sharks

her eyes were the sickly green of the sky before a tornado, and to his horror he discovered she could throw cows around just as easily

to his horror? weak shit. outta my way gayboy im boutta get it

first thing id do as a skeleton is drink red wine from a goblet and have it spill out everywhere . second thing id do is play my ribs like a xylophone

Putting this in my queue. Hopefully by the time it posts it'll be time.

the issue with growing up in the 2000s and 2010s was like there was this really big push toward "accepting your weirdness" overall but they meant like idk wearing mismatched socks or something not being tangibly beyond the norm in any way shape or form

you literally have to unironically listen to some shit like party rock anthem so you don’t kill yourself

You can lie when you name things

basketball players fight over the basketball because they are hypnotized before each game to believe it is their egg

I hope you get your favorite food this week and your favorite drink and your favorite 2k dollars