ashley

matt let out a dry chuckle at the pet name, “baby?” he spoke slowly, as though the word was one that only he could use when addressing me.

“um, matt…this is dylan. remember the guy i told you i was talking to?” i spoke hesitantly. matt looked him up and down, his glare never faltering as he nodded lightly.

“dylan, this is-” “matt” dylan finished for me, speaking in a matter-of-fact tone. “she’s spoken a lot about you” he told matt, “i don’t really get the hype, but…” he mumbled under his breath, earning a slap to the chest from me.

dylan was usually a sweet, well-mannered guy. i don’t know why he was acting this way towards matt, only having just met him, but i wasn’t going to allow him to speak to him like that.

“that’s funny, didn’t hear a word about you until today” matt spoke, pressing his lips together with his eyebrows raised.

dylan opened his mouth to respond, but i spoke up before he could continue, “what are you doing here dylan?” i asked. i didn’t appreciate him showing up out of the blue, knowing damn well that i already had plans. he had only been to my house one time prior, to drop me off food when i wasn’t feeling well. i would’ve texted matt, but he had already been pissed off that day, and i didn’t want to be a burden to him.

“i figured i’d come see you, make sure you were doing ok, meet this best friend you’re always on about”

“well, here he is” i smiled awkwardly, praying that dylan would just leave. he seemed like a decent guy, but the way he interacted with matt told me everything i needed to know.

“you can go now” matt stated quite bluntly. he was obviously over the situation, and i couldn’t say i blamed him. “i don’t think it’s really up to you to kick me out, it’s not your house” dylan spoke smugly. who the fuck was this dude ? he acted so differently over text than he did in person.

“if matt isn’t comfortable with you here then i’m not either” i spoke up. dylan didn’t seem to like that response, his jaw clenching as he glanced at matt.

“hmmm, that’s interesting. you didn’t have that attitude a couple days ago, you practically begged me to stay” he smirked down at me. he was just pulling things out of his ass at this point.

“i was sick and i didn’t beg you for shit. i never asked for you to do anything, you took it upon yourself to stay” i clarified, knowing he was just trying to get under matt’s skin.

“so what, now you’re ungrateful ? you got your little boyfriend back and now i don’t matter to you? you just needed someone to keep your bed warm, is that it ?” he asked.

"what are you even talking about ? i never let your weird ass in my bed” his jaw tightened at that, he was growing angrier by the minute.

“i’m talking about you leading me on. who was there for you while your buddy here abandoned you ?” dylan asked, poking his finger into matt’s chest. matt immediately reacted to the touch, slapping his hand away.

matt’s silence throughout the entire conversation was a dead giveaway of how pissed off he was. his eyes held a blank look, and i had no clue what he was thinking. all i knew was this wasn’t going to end well.

“there for me? you were there for you. you didn’t even listen to a word i was saying. if you had, you would’ve realized that i never once gave any indication that i liked you. i wanted a friend and you clearly just wanted to get in my pants.”

“be honest, if matt wasn’t standing here, you’d let me. you can deny it all you want, but deep down you know it’s true. you’d take dick anywhere you can g-” one second he was talking, the next he was cut off by a sickening crack.

i didn’t even realize matt had thrown a punch until i saw dylan stagger backwards, the sheer force of matt’s fist causing him to lose his balance.

it almost seemed as though everything was moving in slow motion as i watched matt grab him by his shirt, holding dylan up to look in his eyes. matt’s eyes bounced between dylan’s before he let out a low chuckle, “you didn’t think i was just gonna let you talk to her like that, did you?”

dylan’s nose was bruised pretty badly, blood trickling out of it as he stared at matt with a blank expression. he was trying to hide it, but it was pretty clear that he was terrified.

“tell her you’re sorry” matt spoke, pulling him to stand up straight. instead of speaking, dylan just glared at matt, refusing to follow his commands.

“do i need to say it slower for you? you can either apologize or i can give you something other than that broken nose to worry about” matt’s voice was gruff and cold, something i wasn’t used to. i’d be lying if i said i didn’t find it hot.

dylan looked down at the ground, avoiding eye contact as he muttered, “i’m sorry” in an annoyed tone. matt wasn’t having that shit.

his grip on dylan’s shirt tightened, his knuckles turning white as he got in his face once more. “look her in the eyes, and say it like you mean it.” he spoke firmly.

dylan closed his eyes in annoyance, before opening them and looking at me. “i’m sorry” he said, making it seem more believable. "great” matt spoke shortly giving him a quick push away from the doorway.

“bye” he raised his eyebrows before pushing the door shut and locking it. he turned to look at me, his hands resting on my shoulders, “are you ok?” he asked softly.

“yeah. are you?” i asked, staring at his knuckles, which were starting to bruise. “as long as you are, yeah” he spoke, his thumb gently rubbing my jaw.

i lifted my head slightly, looking into his eyes. i watched as his eyes moved around my face, observing my features. his thumb traced the outline of my lips, while his eyes fixated on them.

he blinked slowly, his mouth hanging open slightly as though he was in a trance. his eyebrows were slightly furrowed, a few strands of his hair falling into his face.

we both stayed in that position, examining each other, waiting for the other to make a move. my breath hitched when matt’s free hand slid down to my waist, rubbing the skin under my shirt.

his cool hand traveled to the small of my back, the difference in our body temperatures sending a shiver up my spine. realizing he had no intentions of making a move, i wrapped my arms around the back of his neck, pulling his lips to mine.

the sudden action pulled a low moan from matt, as he kissed back immediately. it was merely a tender brush of our lips, leaving a fluttering sensation in my stomach. i felt matt smile against my lips just before i pulled away, eyes still closed.

when i felt matt’s forehead pressed against mine, my eyes opened to look into his again. “what was that for?” he asked, his thumb running along the bare skin of my back.

“it’s my way of thanking you” i told him, grabbing the hand that was on my face and bringing it to my lips. i placed a soft kiss to his knuckles before intertwining our hands. “in that case, i think i deserve some more thanking” he smiled before placing his lips onto mine again.

the kiss went from hesitant to heated fairly quickly, matt’s hands sliding down to lightly squeeze my butt. he pulled me towards the couch, detaching our lips for a minute to pull me on top of him, before his mouth found mine again.

matt’s hand wrapped around my neck as he tilted my head back, leaving kisses to my jaw. his nose brushed against my skin as he left open-mouthed kisses down my neck. i let out breathy moans as he nibbled on the skin, his fingers sliding under the thin material of my shorts to brush over my skin.

he let out an audible groan when he felt the lack of clothing under my shorts. “no panties?” he asked, continuing to caress the supple skin under his fingers.

i shook my head shyly, a moan of surprise leaving my lips at the feeling of his finger against my bare pussy. “you’re so wet, baby. you weren’t gonna say anything?” he asked. before i could answer, he left a quick slap to my ass.

“get up for a second, pretty girl” he told me, watching as i followed his instructions, standing in front of him. “take off your shorts” he ordered, pupils blown wide as he watched me kick off my shorts.

“good. now sit on my face” he spoke, his bluntness catching me off guard. “what?” i asked, eyes widened. “i have some making up to do. so be a good girl and ride my face” he spoke, his eyebrows raised.

he moved to lay down on the couch, holding his hand out. i took his hand, crawling over him and hovering over his face. i lowered myself onto him slowly, letting out a squeal as he wrapped his arms around my thighs and pulled me down onto him swiftly.

i rested my hands on the arm of the couch, clutching onto it for dear life as his tongue explored every inch of my heat. his grip on my thighs was bruising as he lapped at the wetness that dripped out of me.

my loud moans continually filled the room as i rocked my hips against his face desperately. he swept his tongue through every fold meticulously, not leaving an inch of my core untouched.

his face was red, eyes rolled into the back of his head as he lost himself in the taste of my essence. he seemed to be in his own world, the only thing occupying his mind being his face buried in my pussy.

his hands slid to my ass, alternating between striking the skin with his palm and rubbing it in soothing circles. he went from giving me slow, languid strokes in a long stripe to quick kitten licks all over my heat.

“yes, matt! right there, holy shit” i cried out rather loudly, feeling him smirk against me. he licked and licked at my puffy lips, the pleasure shooting through me becoming almost overwhelming.

he adjusted the angle of his head, titling it forward slightly, hitting my clit perfectly with each push forward of my hips. i screamed out at that feeling, my toes curling up and eyes screwing shut.

“matt! i’m close, so close” i whined as he pushed a finger into my entrance from behind, earning a loud moan from me. “yes, matt! don’t stop, oh my god”

he plunged his finger in and out me, the sloshing of liquid accompanying it, alerting matt to what was coming. “you gonna squirt for me, beautiful? you got it, let it go baby” he muttered against me, causing my body to shake on top of him.

“fuck! yes, yes, yes” i chanted as the liquid spewed out of me, drenching matt’s face in my pleasure. shortly after, white beads of my arousal dripped out of my hole. “shit” i spoke, letting out a deep breath as i lifted myself off of matt.

“bath or shower?” matt asked, his face and hair drenched in my orgasm. “shower, i can return the favor in there” i answered as he interlocked our fingers.

“oh, no need to. that was really hot” he spoke, leaning in to whisper in my ear, “i came while you were on my face” he spoke, leaving a kiss to my cheek.

he flashed a cheeky grin at my shocked expression, before pulling me by the hand towards the bathroom.

the last way i thought this night would end was with matt being pussy drunk. not that i was complaining.

masterlist

ever since the day he apologized, matt had been acting weird. there was a very obvious tension between us, but neither of us said anything about it. his brothers on the other hand, were quick to point it out.

“ok, what’s up with you two? did you fuck again, or something?” chris asked, earning a quick hit and an incredulous look from nick. matt just rolled his eyes, answering with a brief “no”, before turning in the direction he came from.

he was distant and quicker to anger than he usually was. it seemed like the smallest things set him off, he was just so mad. his recent attitude has made me quite distant myself because being around him wasn’t very enjoyable.

he had his moments where he seemed like his usual self, but for the most part, he was miserable. of course i was aware that this was partially my fault, as right after our conversation about the night we slept together his entire demeanor changed.

i felt terrible, and i wanted nothing more than to help him feel better. but i tried to figure out what was wrong, and he just pushed me away. i wanted to be there for him, but he was a grown man at the end of the day. if i did or said something to upset him, he needed to communicate what that was.

so for the past week, we didn’t hang out unless it was with his brothers. we barely spoke two words to each other, and he couldn’t even look at me on the rare occasion that we did. i tried not to let it get to me, but he was supposed to be my best friend. now he couldn’t even be around me ?

MATT’S POV

just when i think i can’t possibly make things worse than they already are, i prove myself wrong. i somehow managed to completely drive y/n away, and now i couldn’t even look at her.

every time i saw her, i felt the shame and guilt eat away at me. i’ve treated her terribly for the past week, and now she couldn’t stand being around me.

at first i just wanted a little bit of distance, because i knew that the second i felt her soft fingers on my face or watched her plump lips pull into a smile, i would be gone. she’s constantly running through my thoughts, and i have no way of stopping it.

every day chris made these sly comments about how i should make a move on her before someone else did, and that pissed me off. his words constantly rang through my ears, and it made me paranoid.

every time she smiled at her phone and typed away at her screen, which was happening a lot more often recently, i got more and more annoyed. i did my best to push it down and ignore it, but it always seemed to make things worse.

whether she was talking to someone or not, she was growing more and more distant by the day. i found myself missing her when she was in the same room as me, which made me realize just how bad i let the situation get.

i decided to go over to her house to talk to her, knowing i had to clear the air. and that’s how i ended up here, standing at her doorstep anxiously, trying to gain the confidence to knock.

before i could force myself to do it, her door swung open. i must’ve looked like a deer in headlights, my eyes widened as she caught me off guard. she let out a chuckle at that, “i saw you on the doorbell camera, i thought i’d just make this easier for you”

well that’s embarrassing. “you saw that whole thing?” i asked, hoping it wasn’t true. when she nodded her head in response, i closed my eyes shaking my head slightly as i cursed myself. “it’s ok, matt. it was cute” she spoke, a small smile on her face.

i felt my face heat up while i prayed she didn’t notice the deep shade of red that my face turned at the comment. “come on” she motioned to the inside of her house, choosing not to comment on my flustered state.

READER’S POV

when i moved to the side to let matt in, i caught sight of a small paper bag in his hand while he passed me. he led the way to my room, pushing my door open and making himself comfortable on my bed.

“i was thinking we do a movie night?” he asked hopefully, emptying the bag of its contents; an array of different candies, snacks, and a drink for each of us.

whenever matt and i had a disagreement, our way of calling a truce was to have a movie night. we would take the time to talk it out and end off the night with cuddles and a movie.

“sounds perfect” i told him, grabbing the remote and moving to sit across from him. i passed him the remote when i felt my phone buzzing in my pocket. i pulled it out, opening it to see a text from the guy i’ve been talking to for the past week.

dylan 🤠

hey beautiful ;)

what are you up to ??

y/n ⭐️

abt to watch a movie with matt !!

“what movie should we watch?” matt asked, but i was barely able to register his words as i read the next text.

dylan 🤠

matt is your best friend right ?? i thought he wasn’t talking to you ??

y/n ⭐️

yeah movie nights are kinda like our way of calling a truce yk ??

dylan 🤠

ohhh i get u

y/n ⭐️

wbu ??

dylan 🤠

oh yk just texting this girl rn

a lil nervous tho ngl, she’s drop dead gorgeous

wayyyy out of my league

“hellooo? you gonna sit there and text all night or are we ever gonna talk?” matt’s annoyed voice pulled my attention away from my phone.

“hold on, i’m talking to someone right now. just give me a sec” i spoke, looking back down to my phone.

y/n ⭐️

who could you possibly be talking about 🤨

dylan 🤠

your mom :)

y/n ⭐️

that wasn’t funny

dylan 🤠

i laughed

y/n ⭐️

well that makes one of us

i watched as the three dots moved on the screen, before my phone was roughly pulled out of my hand. “what the fuck, matt ? give it back” i yelled as he moved it out of my reach.

i quickly moved over to him, climbing over his body to reach for the phone. he was quick to throw my phone onto my carpeted floor, grabbing my wrists before i could move to get it.

“who was that?” he asked, looking up at me. “none of your damn business” i answered. “considering you’re too busy looking down at your phone to talk to me, i’d say it is”

i let out a dry chuckle at that, “now you wanna talk ? that’s new. usually you just bottle up your feelings and throw a hissy fit instead of telling me what the issue is” i spoke, glaring down at him. my phone vibrated on its spot in the floor, but i ignored it.

“why are you trying to pick a fight?” he asked, eyebrows furrowed. “i’m not, this is what it looks like when you act like an adult and talk about things. i know that might be a little foreign to you” i jeered, his face dropping at the comment.

when i heard my phone vibrate again, i went to go pick it up, but was stopped as matt’s hands gripped onto my waist firmly, pulling me down onto his lap.

“look, i obviously hurt you and i’m really sorry for that-” he started, stopping as my phone continued to vibrate on the floor. “who the hell is blowing up your phone like that?” he started, starting to become annoyed again.

“it’s no one” i answered.

“who is it?” he posed his words as a question, but it sounded more like an order.

“nobody”

“why are you lying?” he asked, receiving a sigh from me. he just wasn’t gonna let it go.

“it’s just this guy i’m talking to” i answered. before i could even process what was happening, matt had flipped us over so that he was the one one top.

“what’s his name?” matt asked, his hands tightly clenching the sheets on either side of my head. my eyes trailed down to his tatted arm, watching as it flexed when he shifted his weight onto it.

“his name doesn’t matter” i answered, willing myself to look anywhere but at his lips. it was tempting, the short distance between us making it hard to focus on anything else.

“is there anything you can tell me about him?” matt asked.

“yeah. he’s not confused.” i answered without thinking, the words slipping out before i could stop them. “he’s made his feelings for me clear” i finished.

“his feelings? he’s only known you for…what, a week?” he asked, tilting his head at me. “he knows what he wants matt” i shrugged, “do you?” i asked.

the question seemed to catch him off guard, as he didn’t utter a word. instead, his eyes dropped down to my lips for a split second, jumping back to my own eyes quickly.

“don’t do that” i stopped him, “don’t look at me like you want to kiss me. we both know you don’t” i told him, turning my head away from him.

he was quick to place his hand on my cheek, moving my face so i was looking at him while he spoke. “why would you think that?” he asked, his eyes softening.

“why would you keep running away from me if you did?” i asked, trying my best not to show how hurt i actually was. i blinked back the tears i felt beginning to form, taking a deep breath.

matt picked up on my shift in mood, immediately moving to sit next to me. “fuck, i’m sorry. i’m sorry” he whispered repeatedly, pulling me into a hug. “it’s not on purpose, i swear. and it’s definitely not your fault, the last thing i ever wanted was to hurt you” i cried silently in his arms, his hands squeezing my waist tightly.

he pulled away to look at me, wiping away my tears with his thumbs. “is there something wrong with me?” i asked, needing an answer to the question i’d been asking myself constantly throughout the week. why? why was he avoiding me like the plague? what did i do to deserve this?

“of course not. this is my fault, it’s not you. i’m just confused and i have no clue what to do. i don’t know what i want, and i didn’t know how to deal with-” he stopped abruptly, like he was about to slip up and say something he didn’t want me to hear.

“i just didn’t want to hurt you while i was figuring out my shit, so i distanced myself from you. i know it was wrong, but i didn’t know what to do. and then i realized you were talking to someone and it just made me so mad, but i shouldn’t have taken it out on you”

“you’re jealous? matt, it’s not like he’s replacing you. he’s just a new friend” i pointed out. “i’m right here, i’m still your best friend. and you can always talk to me about anything. you know that, right?” i asked.

“yeah, i know. but are you sure you’re just friends? you said he has feelings for you” matt spoke, looking down as he spoke the last sentence. “is he the only one?” i asked bluntly, tired of beating around the bush.

matt’s head snapped up at the call-out, his lips turning upwards into a small smile. “i-” he was cut off by his phone ringing in his pocket. he looked like he wanted to continue, but i stopped him, “just answer it, it’s ok” i nodded to him, watching him pull it out.

“it’s chris” he sighed out, before hitting the answer button. while he spoke to chris, i heard my own phone vibrate on the ground. i glanced over to matt, who was fully engrossed in his conversation, before grabbing it off of the floor.

i opened it to several unopened texts from dylan, but the last one is what stood out to me;

dylan 🤠

hey, you home? i’m at your door ;)

what the fuck? he knew i was home, i told him that matt and i were having a movie night.

i glanced over to matt, as he hung up the phone. “he was just asking if i wanted anything from target” he informed me, putting his phone down.

he noticed my widened eyes, his face filling with concern, “what’s wrong?” he asked, walking towards me and placing a gentle hand on my shoulder.

“um, my….uh-” i was cut off by the sound of the doorbell ringing. “here, i’ll get it for you” he spoke, walking out of the room before i could stop him.

“wait, matt-” i started, a few feet behind him. by the time i caught up to him, the door was already open, matt and dylan were face-to-face with each other.

“hey, i’m dylan. you must be matt” he almost seemed amused at matt’s confused face.

“hey, baby” he spoke to me, earning a cold stare from matt as he realized who the man in front of him was. his jaw was clenched tightly as he turned his gaze to me, his eyebrows raised.

shit.

hehehe

masterlist

You turn around at the voice, as you recognize it, but can’t put your finger on it. You turn around to look at Nick, whose head is also turned to look in the direction of the voice. “Who’s that?” Nick asked, letting you go and moving so you could see the figure clearly.

You don’t recognize the person at first, but based on his familiar figure and his almost distinguishable voice, the dots connect in a moment's time.

You gasp, your hands covering your mouth as your heart jumps in your chest. Your eyes meet the familiar eyes of your older brother, Cam. He looks much different from the last time you saw him, his ginger hair grown past his ears, and he’s started growing a beard.

You don’t say a word before walking up to him. You reach up and touch his face to make sure he’s real, and you're not seeing things; something you wouldn’t put past yourself, as this entire night seems like some long, tragic, nightmare.

“I’ve missed you.” He whispers, pulling you into a much needed warm embrace. You bury your head in the crook of his neck as tears, ones that you thought you’d run out of, fall from your eyes and onto his shirt. “Missed you, too.” Your voice comes out muffled by his shirt.

You pull away and look at the stain on his shirt. “Oops.” You say, smiling, remembering how Cam used to complain about the tear stains on his shirt when you were younger, but you both knew it never really bothered him too much. “Damn it. It’s been like 20 seconds, and you’ve already got my shirt wet. Like you're doing it on purpose at this point.” he laughs. You slap his chest and laugh lightly.

The laughing dies down and you guys are met with awkward silence. “So, what the fuck happened around here?” he asked, breaking the silence. You look at him sadly, before your eyes drop to your shoes. “Oh, you know, just a good ole family dinner.” You glance up at Cam, whose lip curls upwards for a second, before dropping. “What happened?” he asked, softer this time, looking for more of an answer.

“Dad met my boyfriend.” You say. “I sent yo-” you cut yourself off as your eyes widened. “Wait, why’d you come, you never come.” You haven’t seen your brother in more than 5 years, and all the sudden he randomly shows up to a family dinner? You’ve sent him countless invites to the family gatherings, all were left unanswered.

“Well, I couldn’t miss another boyfriend meeting. Not after the last one. Plus, I didn’t get an invite last year or the year before, so I was really confused. I thought you guys finally realized how nothing ever changes.” His voice was calm, like it usually was, even when talking about something so emotional. You nodded, eyes lighting up once again, as you remember Nick is standing behind you. “That reminds me. Nick! Come here!” You raise your voice slightly at Nick, who is no more than ten feet away on his phone, probably texting Marylou and Jimmy about their situation.

Nick turns around and smiles, making his way to you both. “This is Chris’s brother, Nick. Nick, this is my older brother, Cam.” The men exchange greetings and Cam turns to you. “Where is your boyfriend, anyway?”

“Currently? Probably getting processed into the county jail.” Nick speaks bluntly. You and Cam look over at him, Cam more shocked than I am. “Seriously?” Cam’s eyes shoot to yours. You nod. “Holy, fuck, this is worse than last time.” he rubs his head, as you nod once again.

“What happened last time?” Nick asks, looking between you and Cam. Cam shakes his head, “Story for another time, but let’s just say he did not stay for dessert.” You laugh at the reference, shaking your head at the memory. Nick rolls his eyes. “How are we gonna get my brother out of jail?” he reminds you.

You sigh, “I don’t know if we can. Where the fuck are we gonna get sixty grand? I-I mean, we could make a go fund me, I’m certain your fans would be more than willing…” You truly have no other ideas, and as much as you didn’t want to use their fans for money, you were desperate. You could see Nick hesitate at the idea, knowing his PR team was gonna have a field day.

“Let me help.” Cam offers, shrugging it off. You and Nick both look at him. “I couldn’t ask you to do that.” You say, shaking your head.

“You didn’t ask, I offered.” he shrugged again. “Let me help.” he repeated, this time more sternly, as if every other suggestion was out of the question. You look at Nick who raises his eyebrows. “Thank you. Thank you so much.” Nick responds, quickly embracing Cam.

Cam’s eyes widened, hesitating for a moment before hugging him back. You smile, knowing Cam was never the type to enjoy hugs or any sort of physical touch. “Alright, alright, if you hug me any tighter, you’ll pop my lungs.” he strained out.

Nick pulled away, his face flushed with embarrassment. “Sorry.” He nervously shoved his hands in his pocket. You chuckle at Nick’s actions, before embracing Cam as well, yours a lot more heartfelt. “I’m so happy you’re back.” you mumble into his shoulder. He squeezes you tighter. “Happy to be back.”

_____

Cam now sat on the couch, checkbook open. You’d told your siblings he was back, and tears were shed. You had no idea where your mom was, nor did you care. She and your father were the least of your concerns, you just wanted your boyfriend. Even though it’s only been a couple hours, you were so worried about Chris.

You knew how much he liked to talk, and that scared the fuck outta you, but Matt assured you he knew how to shut the fuck up when he absolutely needed. If it came to his or his family’s safety, Chris would never speak again.

“Okay, okay, so I can get 2000 dollars from Mom and Dad, out of their retirement fund.” Nick spoke out, typing quickly on his phone. He had convinced Cam not to pay for it all because it was his brother, not Cam’s. Cam reluctantly agreed. Cam nodded at Nick’s words.

“I can give you guys 52 grand, I just won’t be able to get starbucks in the morning anymore.” He shrugged. You had learned that Cam was the CEO of a very prestigious clothing company, ‘Cam’s Clothing’, (very creative), which is where he got all this money from. “So with 52 grand, Peter’s grand, my two grand, and Nick’s 2 grand, it’s only 57,000 dollars.” You sigh.

“Yeah, but the officer only said it was an estimate. It may not be that much.” Matt chimed in, rubbing Maya’s back. She had refused to go upstairs again, and opted for sleeping on Matt’s lap. He didn’t mind, and you were too tired to fight it. Plus, you understood, Matt had been the closest thing to a father figure tonight, and Maya needed that.

The rest of the night consisted of you being held by Cam as he told you, your siblings, and Nick and Matt, stories about his life since he’d been gone. You were so happy he was back, and you let him distract you and your family from the tasks that were to come.

_____

The next week was spent sitting down with Chris’s lawyer, the triplets PR team, figuring out how to get him out of jail, and how to do so quietly. None of you cared if the internet knew, it was moreso the onslaught of opinions that would pop up from people who had no fucking idea what was going on. It’s been a week, and none of the triplets had posted anything, except for Nick posting on the group account that something came up and there wouldn’t be a video for a while.

And that alone was enough to send the fans into a spiral. All hell broke loose as theories and conspiracies flew towards the Sturniolos left and right. Some say Matt was sent to a mental institution, that one of the triplets was dying, that Chris and you broke up. It was chaos, causing you and the triplets to delete social media. You’d all be back, but you were already stressed as is, and you didn’t need to add dumbass rumors to the mix.

Tensions had already boiled over, when you went off on Matt because he blamed you for Chris going to jail in the first place.

“I can’t fucking believe your father put my brother in jail.” Matt scoffed. You both had been going back and forth playfully, until you made a joke Matt didn’t like, causing him to overstep. It had been a long day, as he hadn’t been sleeping and social media was getting in his head. You were just as stressed as Matt so of course the argument escalated.

“That’s got nothing to do with me, Matt! I told you all what was going to happen if we went! And if I remember correctly, youall said it was going to be fine! This isn’t fucking on me.” You spit out. You were glad your younger siblings weren’t home. They didn’t need to hate Matt, because you didn’t even if you were arguing with him.

“How the fuck was I supposed to know your bitchass dad was going to try and kill him?! This isn’t on anyone but you and your fucked up family!” he shouts. At that moment, you were also glad Peter and Cam weren’t home, because if they were, there would be a Sturniolo in the hospital, and a couple more charges on Peter.

“Matthew Bernard! What the fuck is your problem?!” Nick scolded. He’d been watching the argument unfold, not wanting to intervene, although now he wished he had. “Have you lost your fucking mind?!” Nick shouted at Matt, who looked at his shoes. You felt the hot tears roll down your face as you stared at Matt.

Your heart stung at his words, sure, but you always had a way of understanding when any of the triplets were overwhelmed. So, instead of shouting back at him, you walked up to him and took him into a tight embrace. He immediately broke down in your arms, his tears staining your shirt. His knees went weak and you slowly lowered both of you to the ground. Nick joined you shortly after, and the three of you spent the rest of that night crying in each other's arms.

So it’s safe to say social media had to go. That was a no brainer. So all of you deleted the apps, making sure the accounts stayed.

Now if someone were to ask you how you were doing, you would burst into tears. You missed your boyfriend and you worried about him constantly. Despite having talked to him everyday through the jail phone, updating him on progress, and him assuring you he was fine, you couldn’t help but hold the heavy weight of anxiety on your chest.

Your nails were bitten down to the nub from the chewing and you had rashes on your arms from scratching your skin as you thought about your boyfriend. Nick had to talk you out of driving to the jailhouse and demanding them to release your boyfriend, and Matt had to calm you down from multiple panic attacks you had just doing things that reminded you of him.

But finally, the day had come. Your dad and Chris in the courtroom, both in orange jumpers and handcuffs on their wrists, your dads arms behind his back, your boyfriends in front of him. Chris looked exhausted, and you assumed it’s because he never slept well by himself. His hair was unkempt and his stubble had started growing in, due to him not being able to shave. His bruises had mostly healed, except for the cut above his eyebrow you must’ve missed when he was in the cop car.

Your dad on the other hand, had 2 officers on each side of him, and his face was fucked up. He had a bruise along his jaw, along with a black eye and a bloody nose. You almost feel bad, but then remember he’s the whole reason you’re in this mess.

There’s no jury, so it’s just you, Nick, Matt, Cam, and Peter sitting in the courtroom. When Chris locks eyes with you, his face lights up and his eyes immediately fill with tears. Not only has he missed you, but he’s missed his brothers, his freedom, and his privacy.

The trial goes smoothly, the judge asks your dad to stop talking twice. Other than that, the trial continued without issues, both lawyers articulating their words carefully for the best outcome for their clients. The judge did not seem to bite the bait your dad’s lawyer laid out, seeing right through the fancy words to distract him from what was truly being implied.

You could tell by the way he looked unimpressed at your dad, even more so when he found out about his not so pretty criminal history. However, when it came down to it, Chris attacked him, despite the valid reasoning. The judge did recognize Chris’s clean record, not even having a parking ticket, which isn’t surprising considering the man didn’t have his license. Chris and his lawyer had their story down to a tee, while your dad and his lawyer struggled to cover up the holes forming in their version.

The judge noticed, of course, and he didn’t let them get away with it either. After what felt like years, the judge came to a conclusion.

“In the case of David, you’ll be sentenced to 3 years in the county penitentiary, with bail being posted at eighty-five thou-”

“You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me! He hit me! Why the fuck would I go to prison?!” Your dad cuts him off, ignoring his lawyer’s pleas. He had stood up, causing the officers around him to be on high alert.

“Sir, stop talking. If you find it hard to do so, you will be removed from the courtroom.” the judge deadpanned. Your dad grumbled under his breath before sitting back down reluctantly.

“Thank you.” he clears his throat. “Where was I-? Oh, okay. Bail will be posted at eighty five thousand dollars, with a year and a half of probation.” he sighs as he directs his attention to Chris.

“In the case of Chris, you will not have to go to prison.” You let out a deep breath you didn’t even know you were holding, clinging to Nick’s side, squeezing his bicep in anticipation. “However.”

Your heart dropped.

“You will be on probation for six months, because you did assault an officer. I understand you have two places of residence, so you can choose what state you’d like to be as you will not be able to leave.

The judge stacked his papers up before looking at the plaintiff. “Get him in a transport van. And get Mr. Sturniolo out of those handcuffs.” The plaintiff nods as he starts towards Chris. The judge smacked the gavel on the table.

“Case dismissed.”

You stand at the stove, stirring the steaming pot of spaghetti, humming to Right Here by Chase Atlantic. It’s been a month since Chris and your dad’s trial, and things have been… rocky to say the least. After getting a mouthful from your mother, she left the house without telling anyone her destination. You figured she just left to cool off, as she had before, but after a day, you began growing worried.

The second your call went to voicemail for the 45th time, you decided to file a missing persons report. Of course, they claimed they couldn’t do anything, especially after you slipped up and told them it’s happened before, they no longer took you seriously, despite you informing them that it’s never lasted this long before.

That following weeks, you decided that she probably wasn’t coming back, so you got temporary custody of your younger siblings. That’s the reason you're still in your hometown, cooking dinner for 9. You knew the boys would be hungry when they got back from James’s football game, and since they had already got takeout twice that week, you told Matt to just bring them home.

Jules and Maya went to a friend's house for a playdate, although Julia insisted it was a hangout. So that left you at home alone, which you didn’t mind considering you live with 9 people temporarily. But your peace is interrupted by the door unlocking, followed by lots of yelling.

You roll your eyes and turn your music off, as you know you won’t be able to hear it anyway. James is the first up the stairs with a giant smile on his face, running up to you. “I won the first game! I got the winning touchdown, and even though some bitch fucked up my shoulder, I was able to catch the ball!”

Your eyes widen as you look at Nick. “Why the fuck is my brother swearing like a sailor?!” You exclaim. “You told me you’d watch your mouth.” You point at Nick after turning the heat down on the stove.

“Why’d you assume it was me?! Matt spends more time with him!?” Nick raised his hands in defense. “Matt knows how to watch his mouth, unlike you!” you laugh.

“She’s got a point.” Matt spoke. Nick rolls his eyes and James looks at you with giant puppy eyes. “What?”

“I scored the winning touchdown!” he announced. You laughed, and engulfed him in a big hug, grimacing at his sweaty body. “Congratulations, kid. I’m proud of you. Now go shower, you stink.” you say pulling away.

“Thank you.” he looked up at you before sprinting up the stairs. You smile as you direct your attention to the rest of the boys that had walked in. Cam, Peter, and Nick got comfy on the couch, while Matt made his way to his room.

You smile at the last standing brunette, your beautiful boyfriend, taking his shoes off. “Hi, baby.” he says as he approaches you, resting his hands around your waist. You nuzzle your head into his chest, humming as you breathe in his scent. Ever since Chris got back, you’d be clinging to him like a koala.

“What’re you making?” he asks softly, guiding you both to the stove, curiously peering into the pot. “Chicken alfredo.” you reply, taking the boiling water off the hot eye. Noticing the sudden silence, you turn around to see all eyes on you.

“What?” you question, looking down at yourself, checking that you didn’t spill anything on your clothes. When you find nothing, you look back up. “What?” you repeat.

“Chris if you don’t fucking marry her, I will.” Nick finally says, causing Cam to laugh. You smile as you look at Chris, who practically has hearts in eyes. “Nah, bro, she’s all mine.” he smiles, approaching you and cupping your jaw with both hands, before kissing you passionately. You hesitate out of shock, before melting into the kiss.

You swear you could feel every word Chris wanted to say, in that one moment. You could feel every word of admiration, every word laced with love, all communicated to you through one kiss.

“Alright, alright, get a room.” Peter grimaces, turning back to the TV.

Chris pulls away, rolling his eyes. “With pleasure.” he said, grabbing your hand, pulling you behind him as he started towards the stairs.

“Ew!” Nick exclaimed.

“I should’ve shut my mouth.” Peter laughs, shaking his head. “Use protection!” Cam called after you, causing you to laugh out loud.

“Chris, what about dinner?” you ask as he tugs you up the stairs into the guest bedroom where you and him reside. “They can get takeout.” he muttered, closing the door as he pulled you into another loving kiss. You roll your eyes but sigh into the kiss anyway.

He leads you to the bed, pushing you down so he can hover over you. “You’re so fucking pretty.” he whispers before wrapping his lips around your neck. You whine as he sucks the spot on your neck.

“Chris..”

“Hm.”

“I love you.” He pulls away, placing a kiss on your lips. “I love you so much more, sweetheart.” he whispers as he rubs circles on your hips with his right hand. “Now, stay still.”

You latch your lips onto his, continuing the passionate make out Chris had started downstairs. His tongue swipes your bottom lip, and you open your mouth a little, as a battle for dominance ensues. You lose, as usual.

You both are interrupted by your phone buzzing, and you pull away as Chris whines. “Baby…”

“I know, hang on.” You open your phone and see a message from Cam.

|‘Dont be silly, wrap the willy’|

|‘No but fr, that mf better pull out, theres already to many kids’|

You laugh and show Chris the phone, and he smiles before rolling his eyes playfully. “Fine, now can we continue?”

You smile. “Yes, sir.” kissing Chris as he groans.

______________________________

“what is it baby?” chris walks into our room, shutting the door quietly and placing a water bottle on my nightstand. he sits beside me and rubs my back slowly.

“rachel from work wants me to cover her shift tomorrow. something about ACT testing.”

he raises an eyebrow at me. “isn’t that something you would request the day off for? y’know like, in advance?”

“that’s what i said.” i roll my eyes before proceeding.

“i already told her no, but she keeps insisting because i’m the only person off tomorrow.”

chris leans over to grab my phone, unlocking it and putting it on do not disturb.

“it’s about time you have a day off. they’ve been putting you on the schedule every day now.” he sighs, combing his fingers through my hair.

“i know. and today was shit.” i huff out.

“do you wanna talk about it?” chris watches me intently.

“i just don’t wanna complain too much.”

“baby, i looove hearing you complain. it’s like, my favorite part of every day.” he taunts.

“only if you insist,” i sit up and smile cheekily at him.

he repositions himself so he sits across from me, pulling his knees up under his chin.

“talk to me sweetheart,” he grabs my hand, kissing my knuckles.

“so i clock in, and right away i’m being told to get on the espresso machine. my manager was supposed to work alongside me but she kept getting pulled away for manager things so i was doing both positions at our station, which is fine, but during a rush it can be a lot.” i start to ramble.

“and the second she gets back, i get the feeling that i started my period! and i completely forgot about it because i’ve been so busy, so i didn’t have any tampons on me,” i continue.

chris drops my hand and reaches into his hoodie pocket, revealing a bottle of pamprin.

“i actually got the notification earlier from your period app, so i brought these upstairs.” he smiles to himself, opening the bottle and shaking a couple tablets out on my palm.

“chris, thank you!” i exclaim, popping them in my mouth and taking a sip of the water.

“of course babe, i got you.” he pokes my stomach.

“so what else happened?” he asks me.

“well after that it slowed down a little. but the whole coffee shop was a mess after the rush and since we were closing, we had to deep clean everything. i’m just so sore and i want to die,”

“i get it, babe. did you shower yet?”

“the second i got home. fucking rachel spilled a pitcher of cold brew on my thigh and i was so sticky.”

he nods with a slight smile, moving his body up against the headboard.

he laid back in his spot and motioned me over to lay on his chest.

“fucking rachel.” he tsks while rubbing my back.

“why do you hate her so much anyways?” he drops his head to look at me.

“well, do you remember that one day you came through the drive through right before my shift ended? you were picking me up and decided to get a drink.”

he thinks for a moment, “mhm?”

“well she was working the window, and she came to tell us all there was a hot guy outside. basically telling the girls to come look,”

“yeah i remember a few girls came by, pretending to stock cups or something. that’s rachel?”

my lips drew a tight line.

“remember how she had you pull into a parking spot, saying they’d bring the drink out to you?”

“mhm?” he asks again.

“well, she decided to write her number down on a slip of paper and hoped to give it to you on her way out, along with your coffee. i left before her, so while i was getting settled in the car, she was walking up to you trying to rizz you up.”

his mouth forms an ‘o’.

“what a sneaky bitch!” he chuckles.

i roll my eyes at him.

“chris it’s not funny. my coworker wants to fuck you.”

“well it’s never gonna happen, sweetheart. she’s insane if she thinks that.”

i mess with the drawstring on his hoodie, picking at the plastic end.

“it’s just frustrating. she’s been doing little things to mess with me, since the moment she saw us together in your car. like today with the cold brew, that was fully on purpose.”

he sighs, patting the back of my head. “why don’t you just quit? you don’t need to work.”

“chris, you can’t pay for everything,” i sigh, dropping the thin rope.

“i actually can. besides, i’d much rather have you here at home, happy and free to do what you want with all that extra time.”

i smile up at him, lightly running my nails across his stubble.

“you’re too sweet to me, but i can’t let you financially support me chris. we aren’t even married.”

this time, he rolls his eyes at me.

“so what? we already live together. you’re my shawty or whatever the kids say,” he laughs, picking up a strand of my hair, tickling my nose with the end.

“the kids in 2009, and don’t say that ever again, chris.” i snort.

“no but seriously. i know how much you hate this job. and fucking rachel.” he smirks.

“i’ll apply to a few different places in the morning. and we’ll go from there.”

“no, y/n.” he grabs my hand, holding it between us.

“it’s making you miserable, you can quit now and i’ll hold things down until you find something else.”

“chris, i already told you, it’s not fair to you. you’re not my husband, and you don’t need to provide for me.”

he looks to the ceiling for a moment, pondering.

chris faces me again, grabbing hold of my cheeks. “wanna get married?”

“married? chris i-i’d marry you in an instant but not for this reason. you can’t be-“

he pulls away from me and leans over his side of the bed, digging through his nightstand.

turning to face me, he opens his fist to reveal a ring.

what the hell? i sit up quickly.

“y/n.” he holds the ring up.

“i’ve been wanting to do this for a while. i know my timing may not be ideal, but i hate the fact that i’m not your husband, and i hate the fact that you won’t let me take care of you. married or not, i’m always going to be here to take care of you, to help you, to love on you, especially when you’re having a day like today.” chris takes my hands in his, holding the ring on his fingertip.

“..but i’d really rather be married to you and do all those things.”

“chris, you don’t mean..” i begin.

“don’t act all surprised now.” he wiggles his eyebrows.

“you know i love you, we’ve talked about getting married someday. i think we should just do it sooner than later.”

“chris, i don’t know what to say. i want to marry you, i just don’t think it should be because i hate my job.”

“it’s not because of that. i’ve been planning this, if i wasn’t then there wouldn’t be a ring here. what do you think?”

“holy fuck, chris.” i take his hand and open it, placing my left one in his palm.

“let’s get married.” i smile up at him.

he slides the ring on and tackles me into a hug, causing us both to fall backwards on the bed.

“i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you!” he chants while peppering kisses all over my face.

short, sweet kisses turn into a long, heated make out that gets interrupted by three dings from my phone.

“did you not see me turn your phone on do not disturb?” chris huffs out.

“i swear to god if it’s rachel..” i pause, leaning over to pick up my phone.

“she did that ‘notify anyway’ thing. she’s insisting i cover for her tomorrow.”

my phone starts to buzz in my hand, causing chris’s head to snap in its direction.

“absolutely not!” he grabs the phone and clicks it off, throwing it on the other side of the bed.

“fucking rachel. someone needs to punch her in her throat.” he says jokingly.

“h-hello?” a small voice escapes my phone.

“shit, chris i thought you declined the call!” i lunge for the device, end the call and turn the phone off.

“do you think she heard me?” he asks, wide eyed, with a smile tugging on the corners of his lips.

“i don’t care, i’m quitting that job anyways. i have a husband now.’ i beam at him, waving my hand in his face.

“hell yeah you do!” he places his hands on my waist and brings me back down to him.

⠈⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄

hope u liked it 🤍 also this is dedicated to rachel i hate u please quit so i don’t have to! just kidding that’s mean! (i’m not)

comment if u hate rachel too

tags!

@imwetforyourmom @anonymouslyachrisgirl @junnniiieee07 @imtalkinnonsense @wh0resstuff

Matt’s hand gently caressed mine as I shrunk into the stiff chair. The turbulence of the plane roared as the plane drifted up in the sky. 

“Don’t worry, this is the worst part.” he whispers. I nod, trying to focus on the warmth of his hand in mine. 

Sure enough, moments later, the plan evens to a steady balance. My brain refuses to wrap around the face that I’m miles up in the sky as my tired head leans on his shoulder. 

Nick and Chris sit in the two seats in front of us. Madi and Laura weren’t coming yet. Madi had an audition in Florida, which resulted in the fact that we’d be staying in a hotel until she came out. Matt had taken care of everything, despite me reassuring him I had some money saved up now from babysitting. 

I hadn’t seen George in the past week. All I knew was that he looked sicker. Becoming sober now was only stalling his time now, his liver was simply too weak to contain its life anymore. 

My mind wrapped around the idea of him, pale and lifeless, hesitantly. 

Would it really feel any different? 

What if it feels relieving?

Any thought that passed through my mind already had, countless times as I sobbed inside of Matt’s bed. He wasn’t the only one who had offered me a shoulder to cry on, so had Jimmy. 

It was odd. 

Seeing a man that was George’s age so gentle and kind was foreign to me. Jimmy took care of Marylou, helping her around the house, offering her small tokens of love. He also took care of each of his boys, spending quality time around them, joking with them. Now, he had extended the same behavior to me. 

He had been telling me about George’s condition, telling me to do what was best for myself. I broke down. Everyone was gone at Matt’s hockey game, a game George apparently warned them he was going to–for Jeffrey. 

Salt in the wound, to say the least. 

Jimmy had asked if he could hug me, I simply melted in his arms. His embrace wasn’t completely foreign. It felt like Marylou’s and Matt’s, warm and endearing. His touch didn’t haunt me, taking away any of my peace. Instead, I found a comfort, one that I least expected in such a circumstance. 

Pieces clicking into place. Hope evolving into reality. 

All without him. 

I was already moving on and he wasn’t even dead, but the little girl who had mourned for countless years had brought me to now. 

How am I supposed to grieve someone who's been dead to me for years? 

Not a single drop of joy was littered in memories with him. A bitter sour tasted as I lingered on his unforgiving words and actions. 

The lack of love from him hasn't felt any different. The void of his rath had. I was granted with more peace of mind staying away from him, acting as if his presence was all a nightmare. 

Matt silently understood, everyone did. I stayed away. Well, more like I didn't chase him. It wasn’t like he was reaching out. Maybe he was too busy with Jeffery. 

“See? Are you doing better now?” Matt asks. 

I look over, nodding my head affirmatively. He swiftly plants a kiss on my lips, catching me off guard as a pink hue clouds over my cheeks. I hear a ruffle, feeling him shove something into my lap. My eyes wander down, widening with excitement as I see the chocolate cookies. 

“Oh my god, thank you.” I whisper out. 

He nods, reaching over and opening the package. He shoves a cookie into my mouth as I salivate at the sweet taste. 

“God, these are so good.” I moan out quietly. Matt gives me a wide-eyed look. 

I lean back into my chair, munching on the cookie. I feel Matt’s hand land on my thigh, looking over to see him leaning in behind my ear. He rests his nose in my hair, the warmth of his breath sending my body into a frenzy. 

“Don’t tease me, god.” he breathes out. I do a double take, the cookie almost forgotten as his sultry voice vibrates against my ear. 

I gulp as he pulls back and leans into his chair, his hand clasping tighter on my thigh as I let out a shaky breath. 

_

I had admired the contrasting beauty of La. Palm trees waved in the air occasionally, a much warmer breeze than Boston’s roaming through the polluted streets. More colors in paint on buildings, less in the trees and the nearly barren grass. 

The drive wasn’t too long, the rental car place being practically attached to the airport. I had sat next to Matt the whole way. His hand had yet to leave my thigh, but I wasn’t complaining. 

Now, we stood in the hotel lobby. Nick was talking to the front desk employee as Chris stood right behind him. Matt and I stood a couple paces back as I held back a laugh looking at him. I held only my purse, a small bag slug across my shoulders due to Matt’s insistence on carrying everything else. 

“Can we share a hotel room?” I ask Matt. 

He nods his head, his hands preoccupied by bags, some his and some mine. “M’course, sweetheart. I was hoping you’d want me instead of Nick to be honest.” he mentions. The veins in his forearms prominent from the strain of his muscles, sending my tongue licking over my lips. 

Nicks huffs, handing me one of the room keys as we all start walking away from the desk. 

We had booked two rooms last minute, given it was all that was available at such short notice. Luckily, they were on the same floor. Unfortunately, they were practically on the opposite sides of the building according to the numbers. 

As the elevator dinged, the small rectangle only showed enough room for one pair of us to fit with all our bags. Nicks huffs, “Go ahead, let’s just change and get ready. There’s a beach just down the street, so get swimsuits on.” he says. 

Matt shoves himself with the bags into the elevator. I follow behind, silently holding back a smile. The elevator doors close as I push my finger on the button. 

“How do you like this elevator?” I tease, recalling the memory. 

So many memories, so many memorable moments. 

All with him. 

He smiles at me, shaking his head. “--definitely have to recreate that one, hm?” he taunts. 

I lick over my teeth, watching as his eyes focus on me. “Mhm…definitely.” I suggest. 

The ding of the elevator pulls us out of our trance as I walk out. I snicker, watching Matt have to adjust the positions of the bags to shove through the door. Matt huffs as the doors close, the miniature screen showing the elevator moving back to the first floor. 

Wandering down the hallways, we make it to the room number. I place the key card inside of the door handle as it beeps a green flash. Twisting the handle, I push open the door. 

As Matt waddles in with the bags, I hold open the door. “Thanks, sweetheart.” he mutters, placing a quick kiss on my cheeks as he moves in. I smile, letting the door shut as I breathe in the fresh scent. 

I hear Matt rest down the bags. I walk into the bathroom, in awe of the cleanliness and modern features. “Come here.” Matt’s voice sounds. I exit the bathroom, bathing in the large window of sunlight as I see the bed come into view. 

Matt is sprawled on the bed in a starfish-like pose with his face up. He peeks open an eye at me, scooting over to the side. “Come feel, it’s so soft,” he says. 

I follow his instructions, gently placing my body on top of the soft mattress. I nearly moan as my back gets engulfed in the pile of fluffy pillows. Relaxing into the bed, I feel Matt move, sinking the mattress slightly next to me as he lays his head in my lap, tossing an arm over and looping his hand under my thigh. 

I gulp at the closeness of his touch, the gentle squeeze sending a pulse of anticipation up my spine. I interlock my fingers in his hair, hearing a deep grumble fall from his lips. 

“That feels so good, baby.” he mumbles. 

My mind processes his words in a different context, making my cheeks with embarrassment. I bite down on the inside of my cheek. I fight my thoughts, trying to drift away from the subtle strain in his voice that makes my thighs urge to clench together. 

“We should,” Matt pulls his face up, looking at me. His grins, a questioning laced in his squinted eyes. “--what got you so worked up, hm?” he teases. 

I shake my head, “Nothing.” 

“Oh yeah?” He questions. I feel his hand wrapped along the underside of my thigh tighten, his fingers dipping further between my thighs. I gulp at the action, my eyes going wide as he looks at me with a sly smile. “--you sure, sweetheart?” he taunts. 

My phone ringing from the dresser makes me huff in relief. I get up, hearing him shift on the bed. I reach down, picking up the call from my phone and bringing it to my ear. 

“Meet us downstairs in like 30 minutes?” Nick suggests. 

“Matt, is–” 

My mouth waters as I gulp looking back at him. He’s laying on one of his arms crossed behind his head, a gentle grin being paired with his cocky aura sending a wave of heat to muddle in the pit of my gut. 

“Yeah, we’ll be in the lobby then.” I say, quickly hanging up the phone. 

With a rough sigh, I start reaching for my bag. “We’re meeting them in the lobby in thirty–”

I look up, not seeing Matt as I place my large bag on the bed. My eyes don’t search far as I feel his hands cup each side of my waist. His chest presses against my back as I see him lean down from the corner of my eye. 

“What was that, pretty girl?” he asks. 

I swallow thickly. “We….we, um, we have to,” I stutter, the feeling of his breath fanning across my neck making my tongue go numb. 

“--have to…?” he repeats, urging me to continue. 

The shiver running up my spine fights against my thoughts, beckoning all attention on him and his actions as I try to find the right words. “We have to…” 

The soft echo of his lips kissing my neck makes me melt completely into his touch, his hands tightening with a reaffirming grip. 

“Come on, baby. What do we have to do, hm?” 

I go to respond, words falling mindlessly from my mind as his tongue licks a strip up my neck, just beneath my ear. “Thirty minutes…” I breathe out. 

“Yeah? Thirty minutes?” he whispers. 

I nod, the heat of his touch traveling to the pit of my gut as my legs blindly clench with desire. Matt’s hand travels downward, caressing my hips bone down to my thigh. 

“We better get ready then, hm?” he suggests. The sultry tone of his voice creates a tension thick as I lean into it, helpless against resisting. 

His laugh vibrates against my back as he pulls away. My eyes blink open, seeing him rummaging through his already opened bag. 

“Come on, let’s get ready.” he says. 

As I furrow my eyebrows at him with flustered frustration, he taps his wrist. “Only got thirty minutes, come on.” he says, brushing past me. I turn around, seeing the bathroom door shut. 

‘Don’t tease me,’ my ass. 

I grabbed one of the swimsuits out of my suitcase. It was simple and black, the most coverage any of them offered. I wasn’t used to being in a swimsuit and the thought of feeling practically naked in front of people sent a wave of anxiety in my chest. 

I quickly close the curtains of the window, throwing on the swimsuit. As I adjust the ties, I struggle adjusting the clips on the top of the straps. I hear the click of the bathroom door, turning around to see Matt wandering back with his clothes in hand. 

“I…” he looks up, his eyes nearly jolting from his head as he takes in my appearance. 

“Can you tighten these for me?” I ask. 

Matt nods, moving towards me as I hear him swallow thickly. I face him as he reaches out to tighten the straps. His eyes stay trained at the task, his hand causing my skin to curate goosebumps. 

“Is, um, is this good?” he asks, his eyes darting quickly to mine before falling just as fast. I hum in response as he reaches for the other strap. He tightens it to the same extent as I rest my hands still at my sides. 

“Is this good?” he repeats. I hum once more. His fingers stay on the top of my shoulder. My heart clambers in my chest as his fingers brush against the strap, playing with the flimsy material as he leans down. 

His lips meet my skin right by the strap, his finger moving the fabric down my shoulder slightly. “Is this good, sweetheart?” he mutters against my skin. 

My mind goes numb with the heat of his touch traveling between my legs. I breathe deeply, letting out a hum of content as he plants the teasing kisses along my collarbone and down my shoulder. 

“--so fucking pretty.” he compliments. 

My breath hitches in my throat as I feel his lips envelope tightly around my skin. He sucks the flesh, his teeth gently nibbling. A moan slips through my lips at the sensation, my hands coming up and grabbing at his hair. 

Then, my eyes shoot open with realization. 

“Wait, fuck, Matt.” I mutter, fighting the urge to let him continue. He pulls away, looking up at me through his lashes as he lets his tongue soothe over the forming mark just above my breast. He hums, closing his eyes as he lets his lips travel along my skin. “I….” blanking, I try to form the thought. “---um, no marks--people will see.” I breathe out, a trail of sadness laced in my voice as he pulls away. 

He gently grazes against the fabric of the top of my swimsuit. “I can put ‘em where no one but us will see ‘em, baby. Want me to do that?” he asks. His eyes float to mine, his lips slightly swollen from his previous actions. 

I nod, speechless as he laughs lightly. His lips plant gentle kisses along my skin. “Good, I want to so bad. Can I?” he asks. I reach upward, grabbing the flimsy fabric covering my breast and pulling it down. I watch as Matt’s eyes fall to my breast, his chest heavy with a loud sigh. I reach out, grabbing his hand, bringing it up to cup the area. 

He looks up at me with questioning eyes as he grasps onto the muscle tightly into his hand. I let my hand squeeze around his, affirming his asking eyes. “Fuck–are you sure?” he asks. 

I reach out, lacing my hands in his hair. “Mhm, touch me, Matt.” I whisper out. 

He greedily lets his hand massage the tissue. I let myself bathe in the gentle sensation. I admire his lustful eyes as he dips his head down. The soft lingering kisses from his lips trace along my skin, his hand cupping my breast upwards. He sucks the skin, nibbling slightly just above the peak of my breast. 

I let out a breathy hum of contentment, tugging at his hair as he groans against me. The gentle sensation fades with need, his actions desperate as I grasp tighter into his locks of hair. 

A heavy breath escapes my lips as I start to feel a pool of heat between my legs. Matt’s lips unsuction from the specific spot, traveling to my nipple as he swirled his tongue. I gasp at the shivers coating up my arms, letting myself get lost in the feeling. 

“Tell me how it feels, sweetheart.” he purrs. 

My mouth opens to speak, falling agape as he sucks in my nipple. A louder moan comes from my mouth as I look down at him, seeing his eyes trained on mine through his thick lashes. 

“It…” I become breathless, panting as his teeth lightly graze the sensitive area. “--’m god, so good, Matt, so good.” I let out. 

Matt hums against, the vibration creating a strong sensation of pleasure as my back arches, pushing my chest further to him. 

As Matt pulls off of me, I whine in annoyance, letting my hands fall to my sides. His light chuckle makes my frown deepen as he pulls my swimsuit back up, planting one last kiss on my shoulder. 

“I’m taking my time with you, not thirty minutes, sweetheart. Well–now ten.” he remarks. 

I nod, crossing my arms over my chest as I let out a breathy sigh. “You-uh, you might want to cover that up.” he says. I look down, seeing his pointer finger placed on the first mark he had left, a light red, barely noticeable. 

“Matt!” I complain. 

He plants a swift kiss to my lips, petting down my hair on either side of my head. “---’m sorry, angel, just couldn’t help myself.” he admits. 

I smile at the confession. I flaunt my eyes up to his, scrunching my nose in amusement. “It’s okay, just keep ‘em out of sight later.” I suggest. 

His eyes widened with anticipation at the word ‘later.’ I walked past him, grabbing one of his T-shirts that I had specifically packed as a cover-up. I tug the material over my head, letting the fabric pool around just beneath my bottoms. 

I walk towards the door, turning back to see Matt’s eyes still in the same position and tracing over my body. I slide my flip-flops onto my feet, opening the door.

“Come on, pretty boy.” I tease. 

He snaps out of his daze, the tips of his ears coating themselves with a burning red. 

_

Matt’s eyes had danced with mine all day. The beach was warm, but the ocean was not. Trash coated the shore, irking me as I watched people carelessly toss their garbage to the ground. It wasn’t a very nice beach, it was just the closest one. 

After watching the sunset, Nick had suggested a restaurant for dinner. We all agreed, getting ready at the hotel before meeting at the car. 

It was evident that Matt liked my dress. The simple sundress hugged around my waist in unison with his arm as we walked into the nice restaurant. Getting a circle booth, we all huddled into the seats. 

“Comfortable?” Matt asks. I nod as he hands me a menu from the waitress. Chris and Nick are seated on the next to me, Chris’s fidgeting leg bouncing the cushion under me. 

“If Chris would stop shaking his leg.” I joke. 

Chris huffs, “I need a fucking Pepsi, bro.” he whines. 

I look back at Matt, laughing as we start to look at the menu. 

The waitress comes back letting us all order our food. Matt’s hand clasps around mine, grabbing the menu and handing it back to her. I mumble a soft token of gratitude, my body subconsciously leaning further onto his. 

Small conversion ensues with Chris and Nick bickering with an energetic and impatient aura. 

As the food comes, we all dig in, too hungry to care about much else. 

_

After eating and a long conversion at the booth, we finally headed back to the hotel. We had discussed possible plans for tomorrow, deciding on trying to sleep on LA time and go to the nicer beach further away. 

Tension was thick in the car ride as Matt’s fingers gripped greedily at my bare thigh from the slit in my dress. Stumbling out of the car and into the hotel, we separated and headed towards our rooms. 

Matt’s hand clasped mine until he opened the door for the hotel room. 

“Thank you.” I say. 

He sends me a wink as I look over at him. I giggle at the action, immediately darting to the soft bed. I hear the door click shut, Matt coming speedily around the corner as he jumps on the bed—on me. 

I let out a huff as he steadied himself. He rests his knees in between my now parted legs, my dress slit nearly exposing everything. “Guess what?” Matt sings out. 

His head dips upward, his lips planting a swift kiss onto mine. “What?” I ask, cupping his cheeks. 

“It’s later, sweetheart.” he points out with a grin. 

I laugh, pulling his lips back onto mine. The smacking of our mouths echoes as the desire increases, our lips chasing one another. 

“Fuck,” Matt pulls away, breathless as he sucks in deep breaths, his lips trailing down my neck. “--are you sure? We don’t have to do anything, I–”

“I want you, Matt. I want all of you.” I voice. 

His eyes look into mine, searching for hesitation. “Yeah? Are you sure?” he asks. 

“I’m sure, Matt. Do you want to?” I ask. 

He laughs, his head hanging in the crook of my neck as I feel him press the bulge in his pants against my core. My mouth drops at the sensation, his lips nipping sweetly just beneath my ear. “--mmmm, does that answer your question?” he taunts.

I hum affirmatively, sucking my lips together as my eyes flutter shut. I feel Matt press further into me, a moan escaping my mouth as my eyes shoot open. 

“Fuck, I have a condom in my wallet, hold on.” he grits. 

He climbs off of me, going in search of his wallet. I instantly sat up, pulling off the dress that had already been pooled up by my thighs completely. 

“I…oh my...” Matt breathes out, his eyes trailing over my near-nude appearance. His hands hold a small package, tossing it on the dresser as he reaches around me. “Can I take it off, sweetheart? My god…you look so pretty.” he says. 

I nod, letting the bra straps slide down and off my arms. Matt’s eyes lustfully glance down at my body. I let my hands creep underneath his shirt, tracing my nails along his happy trail as he sucks in a harsh breath. 

“Matt, I want you now.” I announce. 

His eyes darted at me for a quick second. He licks over his lips, tugging his shirt off his body. His hands travel to the buttons of his jeans, unclasping the button. “I’m here, sweetheart. Take those off for me, yeah?” he motions down towards my underwear. 

I lean back on the bed, tugging the thin fabric down my hips and kicking it off the bed. Before I can get back up, Matt is crawling over me, finding his way between my legs once more. My breath hitches at the sight. His lips greedily travel from my collarbone to my stomach as I lace my hands in his hair. 

“Do you wanna put it on for me?” he asks, grabbing the small package off the nightstand. I nod, grabbing it quickly and carefully tearing it open. Matt kneels between my legs. I reach out, sliding it on him as his face scrunches at the sudden touch. “Mmmm, sweetheart. Are you sure?” he asks. 

Instead of voicing any words, I clasp my hand around the back of his neck. He falls down to me as our lips smother each other. The sudden friction of his dick against the burning between my legs sends me in a frenzy, my hips chasing the sensation as our mouths fall open against each other, a unison sounds of pleasure echoing in the room. 

“Fuck, you’re wet.” he voices. 

I whine, feeling him direct the tip of his cock against my folds. The unholy noise of it sent my thighs clenching shut, only to be stopped by his hips. “--gotta keep ‘em open for me, sweetheart. Can you do that?” I nod, my eyes darting to find him staring down at the sensual sight. 

His tip nudges into my entrance, the thickness of it not even budging into me. “Hey, relax for me, okay?” Matt suggests, his eyes flickering up to mine with a reassuring glance. 

“Okay,” I whisper out. 

The familiar feeling of his finger entering me sends my back arching off the bed. He curls them upward, a sensation that makes a cry leave my lips. “Yeah, feels good, right? He asks. 

I nod mindlessly, chanting a course of affirmations as he pumps his fingers in and out of me. “I’m gonna put it in now, okay? Just tell me if you wanna stop and I will.” he says. 

I feel his tip rest at my entrance, slowly pushing in as my mouth silently falls open. I look down, watching his body seep further into mine. The feeling is foreign as I take a deep breath, relaxing. “That’s it, baby….you’re taking me so good.” he praises. 

I clench around him at his words, a loud hiss leaving his lips. “Fuck, don’t do that, I’m trying to hold back….fuck.” he mutters. I feel his pelvis meet mine as he bottoms out. 

I moan as he grinds into me, adjusting to the sensation. Matt looks up, my eyes finding his. “Just, god, just tell me when I can move, baby.” he mutters. 

He leans down, crashing his lips onto mine as I savor the feeling of fullness. Our mouth sloppily meet, sliding with trails of saliva messily skewing from our lips. 

“Matt,” I breathe out. His eyes meet mine as I rest my hand onto his shoulders. “Fuck me. I need you.” I voice. 

He hums, tucking his head into the crook of my neck. He pulls out halfway, pushing himself back inside of me. The movement sends waves of pure bliss, my mouth parting as I moan out. “--so fucking good. You feel so good, sweetheart….so good.” he pants. 

My walls clench around him at the praise as he starts thrusting at a soft pace. The bliss turns into lost pleasure as the moans fall in a chorus from my lips. “---more, more, more.” I chant. 

Matt immediately follows the directions, greedily shoving his cock up in me as my back arches further into him. “Does it feel good, baby? Tell me how good it feels, come on, you can do that for me, sweetheart.” he says. 

My mind races against blank thoughts, pushing words to form as he ruts his hips into mine. “I…mmmm, fuck, so good, Matt. You–oh my god, you fuck me so good.” I say. 

Small moans leave his lips as we both start chasing our highs relentlessly. “Harder, Matt, Harder….oh!” 

The slapping noise of our skin echoes as he thrusts his cock into mine. My walls clench around him, the sensation intensifying as his pelvis rubs against my clit. “--so–soo, mmm, so good, sweetheart.” he stammered, his tone showing how lost in the feeling he felt. 

“I’m…oh my god…” My mind runs blank as the climax forms in my gut. My hips shift along the bed, my nails tightly gripping his hair in desperation. 

“Close? That’s it, baby,” he keeps his pace, not letting up and my whole body clenches. The wave of euphoria crashes brutally as he pumps himself into me. “Mmm, yeah, let it feel good, I—fuck—I, I…” His words trail off, strained as his hips ride out the pace, extending our highs. 

He gently pulls out of me, tying off the condom and throwing it in the trash as he walks to the bathroom. I let my chest heave, closing my eyes as I try to catch my breath. 

“Open for me, sweetheart.” Matt purrs softly. My legs numbly spread. I flinch at the sudden cool cloth wiping me clean. “All good. Hold on.” he says. I relax back into the bed, peering out of a squinted eye to see Matt walking to the bed. 

“All good? Do you want water?” I shake my head as Matt lays down on the bed. “Come here, sweetheart,” he says. 

I look over, seeing him opening the sheets. I slide into them, laying on my side. I feel Matt’s hand slither around my waist, pulling me back into his chest as our skin rests against each other. 

“I love making you feel good, so much.” he whispers into my hair. 

I smile, too lazy to open my mouth as my eyes flutter shut. I hum, clenching his hand in mine as it rests on my waist. 

With an exhausted sigh, I let myself succumb to the light drowsiness, reflecting on the dreams of reality. 

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FOUR TIMES IT WAS THE “LAST TIME”:

ONE. SOMETHING IN HIS EYE.

“chris! stop moving your hand!” i giggled as i moved it back into my view.

“ok, sorry but it’s cold!” he spoke defensively, referring to the nail polish that i was applying to his fingers.

“you’re being dramatic, plus this is literally the last coat” i told him while i finished up.

“hey, i think there’s something in my eye, could you check for me?” he asked suddenly.

“uh, yeah. which one?” i asked as i shuffled closer to him on my knees.

i placed my knees on either side of his legs, cupping his jaw to make him look up at me. his hands immediately wrapped around my waist, pulling me into his lap.

“the right one” he whispered as he stared down at my lips, his grip on me tightening slightly.

“better not mess up those nails, chris” i reminded him as i gently lifted his eye lid, looking for the cause of his discomfort.

his hands gradually made their way lower and lower until they landed on my ass. i didn’t say anything, attempting to stay focused on the task at hand.

he squeezed my ass, making me jump lightly and pulling a groan from his lips. i shifted on his lap, readjusting myself so i could see what i was doing.

“blow it” he spoke suddenly, catching me off guard. “what?” i asked, unsure if i heard him correctly.

“to help clean my eye, blow on it” he clarified. “oh” i breathed out.

i leaned forward, making us impossibly close to each other, blowing into his eye.

“did i get it?” i asked as he moved his head back, blinking rapidly.

he moved slightly, causing me to feel something hard poking into my thigh. “chris” i spoke in a warning tone.

“just-please help me” he whispered, his head falling forward into my shoulder. “what about your eye?” i asked, rubbing his scalp with my fingers.

“oh- it’s fine, you got it. just please, please. i need you so bad”

“what happened to us stopping this?” i asked as he began to rut his hips into mine. “fuck, i know. i know. we gotta stop” he whispered to himself, continuing to grind himself against me.

he tilted his head up, his nose brushing against mine with his eyes closed. his jaw went slack as i pushed my hips further onto him.

he leaned forward, placing a kiss on my cheek. he placed another on the corner of my lips, moving to finally plant his lips on mine. before our lips could touch, however, the sound of his phone ringing caused us to jump away from each other.

“shit” he breathed out, reaching into his pocket to answer it.

“hello?” he answered in an annoyed tone.

yeah, there was never anything in his eye.

————

TWO. PAYING ATTENTION

“absolutely not”

“chris, you can’t stop me. i wanna watch my show while i take my bath” i shrugged my shoulders at him.

“our show” he corrected, “and i wanna watch with you. that’s the whole point” he whined, watching as i grabbed the clothes that i left in his drawer for when i ended up staying the night.

“sorry, my mind’s made. do what you gotta do to stay up to speed, i’m watching it” i told him before moving past him to his bathroom, closing the door behind me.

what i wasn’t expecting, though, was to hear a knock on the door once i was comfortable and my show was queued up.

i let out a sigh as i shouted a quick, “come in, chris!” . he came in, sitting on the edge of the tub.

i looked up at him, eyeing him curiously. his eyes met mine and he motioned towards my ipad that was playing the show, perched on top of the tray i had set up across the width of the tub.

“you said to do whatever i had to, i’m not missing a second of this show” he spoke, his eyes fixed on the screen.

i found that pretty odd, considering the fact that he barely pays attention to this show any other time we watch it together. now he just couldn’t miss a second of it? i wasn’t stupid, i knew exactly what he was doing.

“you’re not slick, chris” i told him. “i see what you’re doing here” i watched as he attempted to fight the smile growing on his face.

“i have no clue what you’re talking about” he spoke. he lasted a few more minutes before getting up from his seat on the side of the tub.

his gaze moved from the show to my body, never wavering as he pulled his shirt over his head. i did my best to hide the effect that his stare had on me, but the swishing of the water around me caused by my clenching thighs made it difficult.

“i need a better angle” he spoke, “can i get in too?”

him and i both knew that the show was the last thing he was worried about. if i was going to give in, i wasn’t making it so easy for him.

“here, i’ll just turn it so you can see it better” i spoke, moving it so he could get a better view. his face dropped as he realized there was no excuse to get in.

“i just wanna be closer to you” he spoke, his eyes softening slightly.

i’d never folded so quickly in my life.

“come on” i gestured for him to get in, moving forward to make room for him while he took off the rest of his clothes.

when he finished, he made his way into the tub behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist to pull my body into his.

he placed a soft kiss to my shoulder, clasping the hands that were around me together and placing his chin on my shoulder while he watched the show.

i desperately tried to pay attention to the events that unfolded on the screen, but my focus was gone the second he stepped foot into the bathroom.

now my attention was directed at his hands, which started at my stomach, and slowly moved up. he stopped just under my boobs, trailing them back down to their original spot.

he began to leave open-mouthed kisses along my shoulder and neck, making his way toward my ear before stopping. while he did the same on the other side, his fingers trailed down towards my core.

“chris” i sighed out, head falling back into him while my hands gripped onto his thighs. “pay attention, baby” he whispered, gripping my jaw lightly to face the screen.

his long fingers slid through my folds, making my hips move to rub against them, craving more friction.

he pushed my hips down, keeping them still while he moved his fingers even slower, rubbing teasing circles against me. “just relax, pretty girl. let me take care of you” he spoke before sliding a finger into me.

i let out a long moan at the feeling, my fingernails digging into his skin while he stretched me out. “god, it’s been so long since i’ve touched you like this” he mumbled, watching as his finger disappeared inside of me.

he added another finger, his dick seeming to grow harder against my back with every moan that fell from my lips. “you paying attention, princess ? you just had to watch the show, right?” his words were taunting, yet he was able to speak them in a sweet, soft tone.

i nodded my head in response, not wanting to give him any reason to stop. “you sure? what’s been happening?” he asked, his tongue running against my earlobe.

“i-what?” i asked, my head spinning while he worked my tightness harder. “you said you were paying attention, right? talk to me baby, you gotta catch me up. i’ve been a little…distracted”

the second i opened my mouth to respond, he added in a third finger, pulling a choked moan out of me. i could barely recall a character’s name right now, let alone even try to take a guess at what could possibly be happening in the show. “i- i don’t know, chris. i’m sorry, i just-”

“should i stop? i wouldn’t want you to miss anymore” he was just playing with me at this point, but i was too busy chasing my orgasm to care. “no ! please, don’t stop! i’ll focus, i promise” i rambled on, telling him whatever he needed to hear to keep going.

“i think you’re just saying that” he spoke, curling his fingers to hit my sweet spot. my eyes immediately screwed shut, head falling back onto his shoulder. “you want me to keep going?” he asked, his free hand wrapping around my neck gently.

i nodded my head frantically, mouth hung open as he plunged his fingers into me. he used the grip he had on my neck to pull my head forward, facing the screen again. “watch.” he ordered sharply.

the background music of the show echoed around the room, accompanying the sound of the bath water sloshing around from the quick movements of his fingers.

for a while those were the only sounds that could be heard, apart from the occasional moans that fell from my mouth, until there was an obnoxiously loud knock on the door.

the sound made me lean forward instinctively, making his fingers rub against my clit. i couldn’t help the low moan that fell out of my mouth at the feeling, but it was low enough to be drowned out by chris’s voice, “what ?” he yelled.

“hey, we’re home. hurry up and get out here, we wanna show you something” nick spoke.

instead of stopping his movements, chris pulled me against him, covering my mouth with the palm of my hand. he moved his fingers inside of me quickly, managing to hit the perfect spot and rub my clit with his thumb.

“not stopping until you finish” he whispered into my ear in a low voice before answering his brother. “alright, i’ll be out soon" he yelled back.

“how long is soon?” nick questioned, making chris let out an annoyed sigh. “just soon nick” he spoke. nick seemed to accept that answer, as it was followed with silence.

my hands shot to chris’s bicep, gripping it tightly as i felt my orgasm creep up on me. i clenched around his fingers, signaling that i was close. “c’mon, know you’re almost there, baby. let go for me” he whispered.

my toes curled as i felt the pleasure wash over me, my moan muffled by chris’s hand. “so good for me” he whispered, leaving kisses all my face.

he stared at me for a few seconds, before speaking “god, you’re beautiful”. he began to smile as he watched me become flustered at his words.

i went to say something, but was cut off by nick’s yelling through the door, “ok, has it been soon yet?”.

———

THREE. THE COOKIES

i’m not sure how or why, but it seemed like every time our friend group hung out, i was the designated cook.

the friend group, consisting of me, the triplets, larray, tara, jake, johnnie, sam, and colby, all turned to me whenever someone complained that they were hungry.

“ok, what do y’all want me to do about that?” i asked, “last time i made myself food, you bitches ate it” i pointed out from my spot on the pool step.

“for the last time, we were hungry and you and chris were too busy fucking to answer our messages” jake spoke, “so if you wanna blame someone, blame him”

“ok, but we just ate. how could you possibly be hungry?” sam asked. “i just want a little snack, but something sweet…..maybe it’s cause i’ve just been staring at this cookie floatie under me” jake answered.

“ok, if it’ll get you to stop bitching and moaning about it, i’ll go make you some cookies” i spoke, getting up from my spot.

the group seemed to be satisfied with the answer, as everyone gave little gestures of approval.

“wait, i’ll help” chris spoke, following me back to the door of the house. “no funny business, you too. i swear if you come back here without those damn cookies, i will not hesitate to beat someone with this floatie!” jake yelled behind us.

“if you want the cookies, i suggest you shut the hell up” i yelled back, chris and i making our way inside.

“can you believe they have no faith in us?” i asked him, shaking my head as we made our way to the kitchen. “yeah…crazy” he spoke, but there was something that was off. he almost sounded…distracted ?

i turned around to try to figure out what had his attention, only to discover him checking me out. “seriously, chris?” i deadpanned.

“i’m sorry, but that bikini on you? you’re so gorgeous” he breathed out. “i mean, you look gorgeous in everything but…” he trailed off, fixing the strap that began to fall down my arm. “i’m just admiring you is all” he finished, placing a kiss on my cheek.

he walked past me, going to wash his hands while i attempted to calm my now racing heart. once i regained my composure, i grabbed the cookie mix from the pantry.

“ok, can you just grab the eggs, oil, and water for me? i’ll get the bowls and shit” i spoke to him, receiving a nod in agreement.

once we grabbed the stuff we needed, i bent over to preheat the oven. “sometimes i feel like an alien when using these fancy ass appliances. why is there no preheat button” i mumbled to myself, trying to figure out how to set it.

“chris, can you help me?” i asked, chris immediately moving to help me. he stood behind me, reaching over me to click the preheat button that i somehow managed to completely miss.

when i stood upright, i turned to face chris. “thanks” i told him, “i don’t know how i missed that”. chris’ face turned red and he didn’t say a word in response.

“chris? what’s wrong?” i asked, placing my hand on his chest gently. he grabbed my hand in his, pulling it further and further down until it rested over the large bulge in his trunks.

“you’ve been teasing me all fucking day” he spoke, turning me around and caging my body into the counter with his. he pushed my front half down, bending me over it in one swift motion.

“you think i haven’t noticed that little sway you have in your hips when you’re walking in front of me? the one that suddenly disappears around everyone else? if you wanted me to to fuck you, all you had to do was say so, baby” he spoke, landing a harsh slap on my ass, soothing it with a gentle rub to the skin.

“let’s hear it, beautiful. what do you want?” he asked. “fuck me, please. i need you chris” i told him.

“such a good girl for me” he spoke as he pulled the waistband of his trunks down, pumping himself a few times. he pulled the bikini bottom to the side, sliding his dick through my folds effortlessly.

“god, you’re so wet for me” he whispered before pushing himself inside. “my pretty girl, so fucking tight” he spoke before beginning to move.

his hips snapped into mine at brutal pace, my head immediately falling forward onto my forearms, resting on the counter. he gripped the bottom of my bikini, using it as leverage to drill into me from behind.

i bit my tongue harshly, attempting to hold back the moans that fell from my mouth, but was unsuccessful as they echoed around the kitchen.

i brought the palm of my hand to my mouth, not wanting to alert anyone of what was happening while we were supposed to be baking. every push of chris’s hips sent mine crashing into the counter, creating a continuous thudding sound.

“bet you love this, huh? fucking out here in the open, where anyone could walk in. you want everyone to know who this pussy belongs to?” he asked, squeezing my ass before giving it a slap.

i craned my neck to look back at him, “you, chris. it belongs to you, i’m yours” i cried out. his free hand slid under my bathing suit, squeezing my nipples.

my moans turned into whines as i got closer and closer to finishing. the lewd sound of skin on skin and the squelching of chris sliding in and out of my wet walls filled the space, while the thudding of my hips against the counter got louder and faster.

chris’s hands help my hips, fingernails digging into the skin as his grunts and heavy breathing echoed in my ears.

“oh my god, i’m so close chris” i moaned out, face scrunching up as i bit my lip as hard as i could. my head fell forward onto my forearms as my legs began to shake.

“yeah? come on baby, make a mess all over me” he spoke, his nose resting in the crook of my neck, his hair tickling my skin.

i let out a final cry as my orgasm washed over me, coating his dick in my pleasure. i shuddered as he continued to push himself in and out of me, chasing his own orgasm.

my slick was now dripping down my thigh, sticking to both of us as he twitched inside of me. just before he could finish, a yell made him halt his movements.

“you horny little fuckers!” i recognized tara’s voice immediately, making my head shoot up in the direction it came from. my eyes widened, mouth hanging open in shock as i tried to fully process what was going on through my post-orgasm haze.

luckily for us, tara and larray happened to be in front of the counter, meaning they couldn’t see anything from the waist down.

“did y’all even start the cookies?” larray asked, receiving blank stares from us. chris and i glanced at each other for a second, before turning back to them.

“y’all better get cleaned up and check your phones before jake comes in here with his pool floatie” he said before walking away.

THE ULTIMATE CROSSOVER ❗️(10 MEMBERS)

sam 👻🌝 4:03 pm

are the cookies almost done ?

matty b 💁🏻‍♂️ 4:11 pm

we have to stop putting them in charge of food

nick 👑 4:15 pm

i’m scared to go and check

johnnie 🧛🏻 4:17 pm

…i just wanted cookies

colby 👻🌚 4:19 pm

i was starting to feel bad about eating those pizza rolls…. i don’t anymore

jake 🕸️ 4:20 pm

i wasn’t joking about beating you two up with my floatie

larray 💅🏽 4:26 pm

…they didn’t even start making the cookies guys 😭

jake 🕸️ 4:26 pm

WHAT ??? THAT WHOLE TIME ?

tara 👅 4:26 pm

they were a little…busy

chris 🦌 4:30 pm

…. hey guys 🤗

jake 🕸️ 4:30 pm

fuck you

larray 💅🏽 4:30 pm

dw y/n got that covered already !

y/n ⭐️ 4:31 pm

and did

next time make your own damn cookies

——

FOUR. NETFLIX + CHILL 👀

chris wasn’t wearing any boxers. this was a realization that i came to earlier on in the day, when i saw his dick pressed against his sweatpants. finding this out was a happy accident, as i was simply admiring his grey sweatpants.

now matt, chris, and i were all in the living room watching a movie. the lights were off, the tv screen being the only source of illumination in the room.

chris and i shared a blanket, and i was sitting on his lap, per his request. matt was seated on the couch separate from ours, fast asleep.

my back was pressed against chris’s chest, fingers caressing his legs gently while i tried to ignore the fact that his clothed bulge was pressing directly into my core. his hand gripped my thigh, inching further and further up.

“chris” i breathed out, as his hand disappeared under my skirt. “no panties?” he asked. did i decide to take them off right before coming out to watch the movie ? possibly. he didn’t need to know that, though. “no boxers?” i countered.

“i know we said we were gonna stop, but i need you” he whispered into my ear. “can i…can you warm me? i need to feel you so bad” while he spoke, he used his fingers to spread around my arousal, “you’re so wet, this just from sitting on my lap?”

“yes, please chris. want you so bad” i whispered, squirming on top of him. i lifted myself off of him, letting him pull his his pants down to free his dick.

“you gotta stay still for me baby” he spoke, lining himself up with my entrance and pushing the tip in. i lowered myself onto him slowly, biting my lip to hold back a moan when he bottomed out.

he wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me closer to him while we continued to watch the movie. “so tight, could cum just from this” he groaned into my ear. i craned my neck back to look at him, enjoying the effect i had on him.

his eyes were screwed shut, his bottom lip pulled between his teeth. he was very clearly trying to hold back, his grip on my hips tightening.

“what are you thinking about, chris?” i asked, keeping my voice low enough to avoid waking matt up. “i wanna fuck you so bad” he whispered back, burying his nose in the crook of my neck.

he took a long inhale, softly moaning into my skin as his hot breath tickled me. “you smell so good, you know this perfume drives me insane” he breathed out. “i wanna watch you take me until you’re shaking and screaming”

my toes curled at the thought, but i remained still on top of him. “you know what i want? i want you to fill me up until you’re dripping down my legs” i whispered, my hand sneaking under the covers to play with his balls.

he shuddered at that, his dick twitching inside of me. “wanna feel your tongue on me” i told him, using my free hand to cup his jaw. “where?” he asked, his face inching closer to mine.

“everywhere” i answered, my lips brushing his. i took his hand in mine, running it along my body. “my neck” i spoke, guiding his hand to wrap around my neck, him squeezing it out of habit. “my chest” i pushed his hand under my tank top, brushing it over my nipples. “my stomach” i moved his fingers further down my body.

i placed his hand on my clit, watching as his mouth hung open, his pupils blown wide. he closed the distance between us, placing his lips on mine softly while he caressed my inner thighs.

he kissed me slowly and gently, rubbing small circles into my skin. we stayed like that for a while, lips dancing across each other’s until we ran out of breath. when we pulled away, chris immediately began to kiss my neck.

suddenly, matt fell off of the couch he was on, the sound of his body thudding causing me to tense up and clench around chris without warning.

chris’s hips stuttered against mine, his teeth digging into my shoulder as he shot his load inside of me unexpectedly. i leaned forward, holding onto his knees while i focused on holding back a moan at the feeling.

matt’s fall seemed to have woken him up, as he began to stir. “hey guys, i think i’m gonna call it a night” he spoke groggily, barely opening his eyes as he walked off to his room.

“good night” i called after him, chris and i sitting in silence until we heard matt’s door close. without a word, i lifted myself off of chris, breathing out sharply at the feeling.

i turned around to face him, sitting down on his lap. “you sensitive ?” i asked as i began to grind against his dick. “oh my- fuck” he whined, his hands immediately moving to my waist to guide my movements.

“you wanna tease me? fine. but you’re doing it at my pace” he spoke, rocking his hips against mine. “fuck, feels so good” i moaned at the feeling of his wet dick sliding through my folds.

i leaned back, hands resting on his knees as my head flew back. the blanket that was covering us fell onto the floor, having been long forgotten. chris reached forward, pulling my tank top up to expose my tits.

“god, you’re so good. you look so perfect on top of me like this” he breathed out, looking up at me with a dazed look. i leaned forward slightly, causing his dick to slide against my clit perfectly.

“c-chris, just like that. i’m close” i moaned out. i wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling my body closer to him. his hands found their way to my ass, groping and rubbing the skin under his fingers.

“my perfect girl” he mumbled, adam’s apple bobbing as he stared up at me with a glint in his eyes. his words seemed to push me over the edge, my head falling onto his shoulder as my orgasm hit me.

i immediately felt hot spurts of chris’s cum shoot onto my stomach, while labored breaths fell from his mouth.

“i’m glad you didn’t wear any underwear” i whispered into his ear, placing a quick kiss to his cheek. i received a tight squeeze in response.

——

ONE TIME IT WASN’T THE “LAST TIME”:

“you know, i’ve noticed you call me your girl a lot” i told chris from my spot next to him on his bed. we had spent the day out with his brothers and had decided to just cuddle and relax afterward.

i looked up to see his response to my words, watching a small smile creep onto his face. “yeah, cause you’re my girl” he looked down at me, squeezing my shoulder lightly.

“but what does that mean?” i poked, wanting to hear him admit it. we both knew what it meant, but it seemed as though he would never admit it to himself, let alone say it aloud.

“it means whatever you want it to” he answered. i raised my brow at that, not satisfied with his answer. “but what do you want it to mean?” i asked.

“you know what i want it to mean” he answered, "you want me to show you?” he asked, taking my hand into his own to play with.

“it’s just…you only say it in bed” i pointed out, shrugging my shoulders and looking away from him. “i can’t tell if you actually mean it or if you’re just saying it cause you know i like to hear it”

he hooked a finger under my jaw, turning it so i was facing him. “of course i mean it. honestly? i just didn’t wanna freak you out or anything, we both know we’re scared to take this any further. i wouldn’t want to cross any boundaries or anything”

“i’m pretty sure our lack of boundaries is the issue here” i deadpanned, earning a chuckle from chris. “i know, i just…” he let out a sigh before continuing, “i just can’t help what i say when i’m with you sometimes. it’s like we’re so close and intimate in the moment, how could i not tell you what i’m thinking? but i’ve never once told you anything during sex that i didn’t mean, i need you to believe that”

“ i do” i answered, fully believing him. “i just wasn’t so sure is all, but i am now” i told him, staring at our intertwined fingers.

“so, i’m your girl?” i asked, a bashful smile growing on my face. “yeah, you like that?” he asked, tilting his head at me, receiving a nod in response.

“so….you wouldn’t have a problem with me marking you up?” i asked, looking up at him through my lashes. my hands crept under his shirt, pushing it further and further up. “of course not, i want everyone to know who i belong to” he said.

“good” i whispered, ducking my head down to suck on the skin of his stomach harshly. i held his hips down, staring up at him as i soothed the dark spot with my tongue. i watched his breathing speed up, pulling his shirt off to give me easier access.

i left hickies going up his stomach, his chest, and neck. i paid special attention to his sweet spot right under his ear, earning a low groan from him. when i pulled away to admire my work, he immediately pulled me closer to place his lips on mine.

i smiled into the kiss at the sudden movement, fingers lightly running through his hair. the kiss was delicate, both of us savoring the moment, wishing we could just stay like that forever.

the scent of his cologne filled my nostrils, the familiar smell reminding me that this was exactly where i wanted to be. it was comforting, and it provided a sense of warmth and safety, something i always felt around chris.

his lips had a faint taste of cherry to them, a result of the lollipop he was sucking on not too long ago. his hands found their way under my shirt, resting on the small of my back and moving me even closer.

i pulled away for a second, pulling my shirt over my head. he left open-mouthed kisses along my neck and collarbone, his hand sneaking into my shorts.

“chris” i moaned out, his fingers leaving teasing strokes against my panties. “what’s wrong baby?” he asked, as though he didn’t know what he was doing. i countered his action by rubbing his stomach, my fingers dancing along the waistband of his pants.

“fuck” he groaned out breathlessly, his face falling into the crook of my neck. “was there something you needed?” i asked as his hips began to buck up into my hand. “fuck you” he groaned out, while my hand grazed his clothed bulge.

“been waiting for you to” i countered, receiving a harsh slap to my ass in response. i couldn’t help letting out a moan at the sudden action, the wet spot in my panties growing. “so fucking impatient, i don’t know if you deserve to cum” my eyes widened at his words, head immediately shaking in disapproval.

he turned me so i was laying on my back, pulling my shorts and panties down in one swift motion. “chris, pl- oh!” i cut myself off with a moan at the feeling of chris’s face having been shoved into my wetness.

“oh my god” i moaned out, legs pulling together instinctively, pushing his face even deeper into my heat. my hands flew up to his hair, gripping on whatever strands they could and tugging.

chris moaned against me at the feeling, making my head fly back as loud cries fell from my lips. he alternated between leaving kitten licks and pulling my folds into his mouth and sucking. he moved his tongue up, focusing on my clit while he poked a finger at my entrance.

“chris, no teasing please. i- fuck” my hips snapped up as he left a slap to my clit. “you’re gonna take whatever i do to you, unless you don’t wanna finish” he lifted his head to speak, his face glistening in my slick.

“i- yes, yeah. sorry” i spoke in shock, taken off guard by the sudden edge to his tone. when he moved away from me fully, i rolled my eyes, annoyed that he edged me.

he rid himself of the rest of his clothes without a word, his hard dick springing free. he slapped his length against my clit a few times, earning a whine from me. “i hope you know, i caught that eye roll” he spoke, glaring down at me.

“fix the attitude cause i promise, you don’t want me to fix it for you” he spoke before lining himself up and pushing inside of me. he waited until i signaled i was ready before moving his hips at a brutal pace.

he thrusted inside of me so deeply, i was left speechless as he knocked the wind out of me. i had no clue what had gotten into him but i loved it.

“you ok, princess? need me to slow down?” he asked, his eyes taking in my already fucked out appearance. i shook my head frantically at the question, willing him to keep up his pace. “i’m good, i’m good. keep going, feels so good” i rushed out.

“good, tell me if that changes” he spoke between grunts of his own. his hands rested on either side of my face, his biceps flexing as he supported his weight on the bed.

i caught his lust-filed gaze on my covered tits, staring as they bounced in my bra. i reached behind me, unclasping it and throwing it to the side, a moan falling from chris’s lips.

he moved his face down, his mouth attaching to one, licking and lightly biting it. my hands flew to his back, nails digging into his skin leaving bright red marks. “yes, yes, yes chris” my moans came out as choked sobs, eyes rolling back into my head.

“i’m close chris, please don’t stop” i moaned out. “hold it” he ordered immediately. “no, no i can’t chris. i can’t” i spoke, tears pricking at the corner of my eyes.

“no? you want me to stop?” he asked tauntingly. “no! please don’t stop, please" i sounded pathetic, begging him like this, but i was too desperate to care.

“be patient, i’m almost there ” he spoke as he continued to pound into me. “so good for me, i got you” he whispered, his praise caused me to clamp down on him, pulling a long groan from his mouth.

“cum with me, make a mess all over me” he spoke, causing me to let go. my juices spilled out all over him, while thick ropes of his cum coated my walls. when he pulled out, he watched our pleasure drip out of me.

“shit, chris” i breathed out, focusing on regulating my breathing. “are you ok? you’re not hurt, are you?” he asked, worry filling his face as he looked over my body.

“no, i’m ok i promise” i reassured him “that was insane” i spoke, bowing my head into his chest and laughing lightly. he moved my face toward his direction, “don’t hide from me, you being a freak is nothing new” he joked, earning a light slap to the chest from me.

“i’m glad you liked it” he spoke, a cheeky grin on his face. “i loved it” i whispered, pulling him into a hug.

once chris cleaned us both up, checking to make sure i was okay again, we went back to cuddling. “can i ask you something?” chris asked, his thumb mindlessly drawing shapes onto my skin.

“always” i answered back, looking up at him. “hypothetically, if there was this girl i wanted to ask out-” he started, before i stopped him. “are you serious? there’s no way you’re asking me for advice about another girl right now. you were literally just telling me i was yours and now you’re trying to ask out someone else?” i asked, staring up at him incredulously. what was wrong with him?

“ok, maybe that wasn’t the best way to ask” he spoke, narrowing his eyes in thought. “chris, are you kidding me right now? you seriously-” “it’s you” he cut me off.

“i just wasn’t sure how to ask, and i figured who would know better than you, right? but i see now how that was a dumb way to do it and i’m sorry for worrying you” he finished.

“oh my god, chris. you’re an idiot” i spoke hitting him upside the head. “ow! i’m sorry” he spoke defensively. “i should tell your ass no for the emotional trauma you just put me through”

“i did say hypothetically, though”

“what if i hypothetically beat your ass?”

“i’m still waiting for an answer” he pointed out. “you know, for someone who’s so big on patience, you sure don’t seem to have any yourself” i spoke, squinting my eyes at him.

“of course i’ll go out with you, chris” i answered.

“good. cause i wanna show off my girl”

the way i lowkey just fed y’all five fics in one 🤭

masterlist

I rub my face, the pads of my fingers grazing over my shut eyes as I let out a sigh. To say I was completely exhausted would be an understatement.

The thirteen hour drive in order to get here drained out about every ounce of energy I had stowed away. Sitting in the backseat while my parents give each other snarky remarks, constant bickering on the “correct way” of arriving to our destination.

Moving halfway across the country senior year was not going to be easy, I know this, but part of me had hope.

A chance for a new start.

The fresh Somerville air fills my lungs as I pick up a cardboard box and walk into my new house, ignoring my parents completely on the way to my new room as I place the box on my bed—well my mattress, seeing as we haven’t unpacked everything and i’m living the first few days without a bed frame.

This room was definitely a lot different than my last, off white paint covering the four walls around me and a large window with a long cushioned seat below it. The wood trim reminds me slightly of my old house, like a small piece of it is here with me even though i’m so far away.

I plop down on the mattress, breathing out as my hands make contact with the cardboard next to me. I use what little strength I have left to rip open the packing tape that encapsulates my life, packed into a brown box.

I tuck a strand of hair behind my ear, keeping the loose hairs out of my face as I lean forward slightly.

Given that it’s currently twelve in the morning, I don’t have any desire to fully unpack, just simply reaching into the box for a lamp to illuminate the undecorated room. The room I’m supposed to consider my own.

With the lamp being plugged in I’m able to turn off the overhead lighting, the warmth of the dim lighting immediately making me feel more at peace in this unwelcoming environment.

Somehow, Im expected to start at my new school tomorrow—being given absolutely zero time to settle in.

I don’t even bother changing, just grabbing my toiletries from my backpack to brush my teeth.

As much as I am tired, I also don’t feel completely ready to go to sleep and immediately start a new life, so I reach into the same box and grab out a journal and a random pen.

I opt for taking full advantage of the window seat in this room, curling up in the corner of the crevice, propping my legs up on the cushion before opening my journal.

It’s definitely a little… sad in here.

Journaling is not something I’m good at, but my therapist back home was very adamant on it so I gave it a go.

Once I start writing though, it’s easy to get lost in a trance, only focused on the thoughts in my head and the black ink on the paper in front of me.

This is before the darkness in my room becomes more illuminated by the house next to me, a bedroom light from across now being switched on.

I don’t want to stare, but I’m interested to see who my new neighbours are, so I look over.

My eyes are quick to focus on the light blue room, random sports posters hung up around as well as a few stuffed animals placed carefully on the bed.

Before i’m able to fully examine the room, a boy my age rushes in, slamming his door shut and immediately sitting on his bed, tension formed in his hands.

His brown hair is slightly damp, as if he had just came back from playing some sort of sport that’s caused the strands to stick to his forehead. He looks exhausted—both mentally and physically.

It’s clear he’s upset and soon enough tears start welling in his eyes, not that he lets them fall though. His hands constantly wiping the tears away before they’re fully formed, as if he’s trying to avoid crying all together.

I try and revert my gaze back down to my journal, although it’s hard to focus on my own sadness when his looks so prevalent.

I know what it’s like when it gets bad, and it hurts me to not be able to go over and help, but again, I have no idea who he is.

It’s as if he had no idea I was here until right now, his nails leaving his mouth as he walks towards the window, making brief eye contact with me before immediately shutting the blinds—blocking me out.

I feel a light sting to my heart, for whatever reason I feel obligated to make him feel better. I’m sure his smile is really nice and it’s unfortunate that a frown now replaces it.

I take that interaction as my sign to go to bed, setting down the half completed journal and plopping into bed.

————————————————————————

A familiar alarm rings loudly next to my ear, signalling for me to wake up. I groan, slapping at my phone until the noise stops.

Usually I’d fall right back asleep, but now that I’m awake I can’t help but let worry override my need to sleep.

A new school, a new city, with new people.

Fuck i’m terrified.

I had tried so long to be hopeful, to ignore my parents snide comments about our lives changing for the worse, but being optimistic is kind of impossible when everything in your life is going wrong.

Nonetheless I get up, a surge of energy pushing up my muscles when I think about what im gonna wear—I haven’t even unpacked my makeup yet.

Getting ready doesn’t normally take me long, at least it didn’t a few months ago, but now I’m constantly getting distracted. Picking at the few pimples that have entered my previously clear face and running my fingers along the eye bags that I can’t seem to kick.

I wish sadness didn’t impact the way I look.

I’ve always loved fashion, constantly playing dress up throughout my childhood with my best friends. Sometimes I still feel like I’m playing dress up, putting on a facade, except this time I’m alone.

I shake my head, forcing on a smile that hasn’t been real in a long time, praying that maybe this time will be different.

When I walk downstairs all I find is my mom sitting at the dining table, a laptop placed in front of her as she rests her head in her hand.

It’s clear she’s stressed so I try and avoid speaking, my bus is supposed to be here in a few minutes and I just need to pack lunch.

Because we just moved there’s very little in the kitchen for me to eat, nothing but yogurt cups close to expiry and healthy granola bars that have lived in our pantry forever.

It’s not an ideal lunch, but based on my mom’s tense shoulders and her scattered sighs, it’s best not to interfere.

I make note to remind my parents about my school lunches when they are in a better mood, although that mood for them hasn’t existed in my presence since the incident.

My hands grab at the granola bars, getting a handful and tossing them into my backpack.

I look to my mom once more, hoping to make her feel better. “Hey, everything okay?” I ask, placing a hand on her upper back as I look towards the laptop.

She rejects my touch immediately, turning towards me with a look of distain on her lightly wrinkled face. “Why would I be okay y/n? This town has nothing but cloudy weather and jobs that won’t hire me.”

My attempt to console her clearly failed, her sour mood overriding any form of kindness she could show me. “Really good pizza though.” I joke, referring to the takeout we ate late last night.

“You’re gonna be late to school.” She mindlessly replies, looking back at the job sit displayed on her computer.

She never was one for small talk, but it also wasn’t always this bad. I used to look up to her a lot, wishing one day i’d be just like her, but now I want nothing less.

I just nod with a tight lipped smile on my lips, choosing to slide my shoes on and throw my backpack over my shoulder.

Opening the front door I send one more look towards my mom who shows no interest in me. Is it weird to say you miss your mom when she’s right there?

I shake it off, stepping out onto the porch before coming to a very unfortunate realization.

Fuck.

If my morning wasn’t bad enough, my bus is driving away, the tail end of the yellow vehicle being the only thing I can see down the street.

I shut the door behind myself, my dad took the car and my mom is in no mood to find a solution for me, so I begin walking—not that I know where the school is.

The best distraction for me is music, so I plug in my headphones while simultaneously getting the directions to the school on my phone.

The morning air causes a wave of refreshment to wash over me. I can’t harp on the negatives of my life, especially when the trees are swaying in the wind and the sun is shining.

It’s a longer walk then I expected, but by the time arrive at school I’m only a couple minutes late.

I rush through the halls, mindlessly searching for the numbers that lead to my classroom. This is until I walk around the corner a little too fast and immediately bump into someone. “Oh sorry, fuck I’m sorry are you okay?”

He laughs, not at me for once, a comforting laugh. “You’re good I promise.” He looks at me closer, studying my face. “Have I seen you before?”

I cough, clearing my throat. “Um probably not, I just moved here from Indiana so.” He nods his head, for whatever reason he looks incredibly familiar and I can’t figure it out. “Do you mind showing me to my class? I’m already late and I have no clue where im going”

He smiles warmly down at me. “Yeah I got you.” He takes my phone to look at the number displayed before beginning to walk. “You’re an AP kid?”

“Uh sort of. Just for english, I’m really bad at math and shit.” I reply, following him as he walks casually through the halls.

“Me too, I’m supposed to be in algebra right now but I can’t be bothered” he laughs slightly. “I think my brothers in your class, do you know a Nick?”

I furrow my eyebrows. “You’re a senior right?” He nods. “How is your brother also a senior?”

“Oh we’re triplets, we look a lot alike we’re just very…. different.” He replies, still joyfully walking without a worry in the world. It really must be nice to feel that way.

“Oh I see.” I say, nodding as we walk up the stairs. Walking around the school feels like the equivalent to running a marathon, especially on my lack of sleep.

He motions to a classroom with the numbers i’ve been searching for. “This is you.”

I smile gratefully. “Thank you.” I pause. “What’s your name?”

“Oh I’m Chris” He reaches his hand out for a handshake, a dumb smile on his face. one that I could really get used to.

“y/n.” I reply, returning the gesture.

“Well y/n you should probably get to class, that teachers kind of a bitch about people showing up late.” He advises, running a hand through his wavy hair. “i’ll see you around yeah?”

I nod, maybe too eagerly but it’s genuine. I just made a friend and I could not be more excited, even if I’m late on my first day. “I’ll see you.”

My hand hesitates slightly before ultimately twisting the door knob and entering the class. Almost instantly I feel all eyes in the room on me, the teacher looking more than unimpressed.

Great way to start the year.

The classroom is slightly bigger than my old schools. There’s light seeping in through the windows and the whiteboard is already filled with different literary devices.

I find peace seeing as there’s a large bookshelf at the back, I have spent more than enough money on books so it’ll be nice to read for free.

“Nice of you to show up” She remarks with a tight lipped smile, motioning for me to take a seat.

“Sorry I couldn’t find the class at first, I wont be late again Miss Harper.” I mumble, looking around for a place to sit and seeing an empty chair next to who I assume is Chris brother.

I walk over, an awkward smile on my face as I pull up a chair next to the boy. He seems all too uninterested in me, gaze dead set on the teacher as she goes over what to expect for the semester.

I lean into him slightly after setting down my bag on the floor, if he’s anything like his brother we’ll be friends in no time. “Hey are you Chris’ brother? He just walked me to class and you two look a lot a like so.” He just cuts me off.

“If you’re just another one of Chris’ many fan girls just know i’m not interested in being friends with you.” He throws me an annoyed look before resting his chin on his hands and looking back to the board.

I let out a quiet sigh, leaning back into the uncomfortable school chair and crossing my arms. I’ve immediately lost all confidence I mustered up. I guess Chris was right when he said they were different.

Luckily the class went by quickly and I was able to find the other two classes easily enough. What I couldn’t stop thinking about was lunch, and as the bell rings it consumes me.

At my old school, most seniors didn’t stay at school for lunch, being in the cafeteria is generally not a common occurrence for anyone old enough to drive.

This leaves me stuck. Sitting alone in the cafeteria sounds awful but so does any other option, especially because I don’t even have a lunch today, the granola bar wrappers sinking into the bottom of my backpack.

I walk out of class, taking in all the new places and people before settling on a familiar face that’s smiling back at me.

Thank god.

The short walk through the chaotic hallways is not enjoyable, I’m practically ran into twice on my way towards Chris.

“What’s up y/n? How was your first day so far?” Chris asks. “Was Harper a bitch?”

I let out a breath, one of literal relief as a real smile enters my lips. The first in a while. “It was good mostly, I met your brother in my english class.” I reply, now walking beside him through the crowded halls.

It’s admirable how nice he’s been to me since the beginning, that’s not treatment I’m used to receiving from people, especially not at school.

“How awful was he? On like a scale from one to ten.” He jokes, waving to random people in the hallway that must be his friends. I had zero idea he was so popular around here.

“Out of respect to you I’ll choose not to answer that.” I reply. “He could be worse though, trust me.”

Before he can reply to me he catches the eye of his brother and a girl who I don’t recognize. “Are you coming for lunch?” Nick asks Chris, purposely avoiding eye contact with me.

“I think i’m gonna go with y/n today, maybe tomorrow though.” Chris replies looking down at me with a reassuring smile.

This only earns an eye roll from Nick. “How many girls are you going to ‘take out for lunch’ and then end up bringing home?”

Chris scoffs, but I try my best to stay out of the sibling drama. Part of me just hoped Chris didn’t only speak to me because he wanted to take me home. I just wanted a friend.

“It’s so not like that but you think whatever you want kid.” The longer haired boy replies, now walking towards the back doors.

I follow beside him until we make it outside, the sun now beating down on us but the small gusts of wind making the september heat bearable. “I’ll take you to my favourite place.” Chris says, head still up as he continues walking at a leisurely pace.

I’m not sure where this favourite place will be, but it’s not like I have any other option.

The walk is short, comfortable silence filling the space between us as we approach a large tree in the field behind the school. “Isn’t it nice here?” He asks, sitting down next to the stump, back resting against the bark.

“It’s definitely a tree!” I reply sarcastically, still moving to sit across from him in the grass.

He pulls out a ziploc from his bag, containing a sandwhich that was very obviously made by him. I throw a slightly judgemental look at the messy sandwhich only earning a smile in response.

“What? You don’t think I’m a pro chef?” He asks, taking a bite but keeping his eyes on me.

“No i’m just really jealous of your artistry with that pb and j.” I joke, leaning my hands down onto the spiky grass.

“Tell me about yourself.”

If only it were that easy to just speak about myself. I usually avoid it if I can, instead paying more attention to everyone that surrounds me.

“That’s very vague, I don’t know if I have anything interesting to share.” I reply sheepishly, trying desperately to choose the right words.

He lets out a breath as he finishes the last of his lunch. “You’ve got something I know you do. a mysterious pretty girl from Indiana wandering the halls of a new school. That’s already interesting.”

The compliment takes me aback, reminding me too much of the people who would call me that in my past. “Are you hitting on me Chris?”

He laughs as if it’s the most outlandish thing I could ask. “Definitely not. I mean not because of who you are, you’ll be fine pulling at this school. I just have my eyes on someone else at the moment.”

“Yeah? And who’s that?” I inquire. It’s easier knowing I can speak to him without there being a different motive.

The last thing I want out of this school is to be seen as meat for people to enjoy watering their mouths at.

When I was younger I had so much hope that I’d find someone who wants me for my personality, at the time that meant someone that shared my love for Gravity Falls but now I just want to be admired for what makes me different. I wish that wasn’t so impossible now.

What I notice right away, is how his face lights up at the thought of her. A smile creeping onto his face as he searches for the words he needs.

It’s subtle, the only reason I’ve noticed it is because I tend to observe people. But it’s sweet how easily his cheeks cast a flushed pink at the mere thought of the person he admires.

“Remember that girl that was standing with Nick?” I nod. “It’s her.”

“So why does Nick seem to think you’re a man slut?” I ask, maybe more abruptly than he was expecting.

“I try to distract myself with other girls. Which, I know is wrong, but if I only focus on Olivia then it gets a little depressing.” He admits, now averting his gaze away from me at the uncomfortable conversation.

“Why couldn’t she be into you back? Have you tried telling her how you feel?” I ask, prying away slightly at his feelings. I’m genuinely just curious as to how someone like Chris isn’t able to confess how he feels.

“It’s different when it’s someone I actually like. When it’s other girls it doesn’t really matter as much to me because it’s not her.” Chris replies. “I wanna be done with this sad conversation though, anyone caught your eye here?”

It’s silly to me that Chris seems to think I was focused on dating on my first day here. That was genuinely the last thing I was thinking about.

Nonetheless a face immediately comes to mind, just not one I saw at school. “In what world did I have time today to scope?”

“Well I don’t know, figured you’d be bored during one of your smart people classes.”

“The last thing I need is another boyfriend, that didn’t end well for me.” I reply. I’m not sure what it is that’s making me open up so easily to him, but it feels safe.

“Guys usually suck, I’m one of them. I just need to make it my mission to find you a guy that doesn’t.” He smiles, playfully punching my arm to bring the mood up.

He’s definitely good and making people smile, but it didn’t work on me all that easily when I think about myself in a relationship.

“I’ll make it my mission for you to confess to Olivia, then we’re even.” I suggest, reaching my hand out for a shake.

“Deal.” He shakes my hand in return before checking the time on his phone. “We should head back in now, you’ve been late enough times today.”

I roll my eyes at him, standing up and bringing my bag up with me.

A random car from the parking lot honks at Chris, a car full of guys laughing as if making a loud noise with their truck is the funniest thing in the world. “Are you popular or something?” I ask, now walking back to the school.

He laughs at that. “I just play hockey, it’s a big thing here.”

I nod slowly, processing the new information. “I know fuck all about hockey to be very honest.”

“Well as long as you’re my friend you’ll know all about it, i’m trying to be D1 next year.” He says, now opening the door for me and allowing me to walk in ahead of him. “Do you play sports?”

I let out a small sigh, once again being reminded of Indiana. “I used to in my old town, I was pretty good too.”

“Really? What position?” Chris asks, keeping his attention on me as we walk together despite the many people looking at him in the halls.

“Outside hitter. I really love it but had to stop because-“ I stop myself, realizing just how easy it is to share everything with Chris. It’s more dangerous than it is charming. “Yeah I had to stop.”

He doesn’t push, even though I can see the look of curiosity on his face. “You should play at our school, the seasons coming up.”

“I’m not sure if that’s the best move. I’m new here and I don’t exactly wanna be doing anything to stand out. Easier to just sit back and observe.” I reply honestly, still taking in all my new surroundings.

“Is that what you do all the time?” He asks, a hint of pity lines his words. Pity has never been the goal, quite the opposite actually.

I place a faux smile on my lips, looking up at him right before we have to part ways to our respective classes. “Maybe this year will be different. I’ve made a friend on the first day which is already out of character.”

“I’m happy to be your friend, you’re easy to talk to.” He says, a sappy undertone to his sentence.

An unfortunate fact about me is my inability to accept words of affirmation. I’m not sure why it’s this way, but I think deep down it’s because I could never say those words to myself, so it’s impossible to fathom other people saying it.

My face literally cringes at his upfront lovingness, but I attempt to not look too disgusted. “I’ll see you tomorrow yeah?”

Chris lets out a small laugh in reply. “My numbers in the side pocket of your backpack by the way.”

“You’re lucky I know about your girl bc you are the most flirty person out there.” I say slightly louder as I turn my back to him, now focusing my attention to getting to class on time.

For the first time in a long time everything feels okay again. I’m not stressed about what everyone’s saying about me and I don’t have eyes glued on me.

In a way it’s nice to be invisible.

a/n: this chapter ended up so long but that’s okay!! let me know your thoughts and feelings i missed u guys <3333

Matt’s POV

It broke my heart watching her face scrunch into pain. Era’s house had always been warm and welcoming, but sitting on the couch, watching her confess the complete truth about everything hurt. The once comforting sofa seemed to sink in with the gravity weighing in the room. 

The party yesterday was an absolute disaster. It wasn’t supposed to be. It was supposed to be a moment of fresh air before I told her the truth. 

I sat on the pillowy sofa with Era yesterday. I told Era how I couldn’t keep the secret anymore, even if it wasn’t my secret to tell. I couldn’t keep a secret again, no matter what it was. I had prepared myself to see her eyes flood with tears, rehearsing lines I knew would somewhat ease the undesirable pain that came with the confession. 

I didn’t know what to do now. 

I have to tell her, I know I can’t wait for the ‘right’ moment. There is no ‘right’ moment to say something this heavy. It hurt to see her in pain, I knew it would hurt to see her in even more pain, but she deserved the full truth. 

She deserved to decide what she wanted. 

Even if it meant leaving her behind, watching her body break with sadness for something no one could control. 

She deserves the truth. 

_

Y/n’s POV

My eyes felt sore. My vision was still blurry as my lashes stuck together every time I blinked. 

I didn’t want to believe it, but I did. 

It all made so much sense. 

Era was always the one taking care of mom—taking care of me. 

George would disappear, I never knew where. 

It all made so much sense. 

“--she got better physically. She was supposed to leave the hospital in a week.” Era says.

I remembered. Everything was supposedly getting better—she was getting better. But, a week later it was far from the truth. Her skin was the color of death, her lips faded into the shade of her face. Her eyes screamed hopeless. 

And now I know why. 

I waited patiently as my eyes blurred, focusing on Era’s face. I didn’t need to hear it to know, I already did. But, part of me couldn’t process the thought until I heard it from her lips. 

“George had promised he’d stop. He didn’t…she caught him over and over again. She couldn’t leave him—not with everything going on. She was trying to get better…for you….but, in her note–” Era’s voice breaks as she turns her head towards her lap. 

“---she didn’t feel good enough for anything anymore. She couldn’t take it. She never confronted George again…she pretended everything was fine, letting him hold her and take care of her, even though it was out of guilt. He just thought she was giving him a second chance…she wasn’t. She–” Era squints her eyes shut, gulping loudly. 

My body stiffens as I feel my heart freeze in my chest. Matt’s arm squeezing around my shoulders brings me back to reality as I stare numbly at the ground. 

It was never love.

It was guilt.

“...she, god, she said how she was so tired—she couldn’t do it anymore. She didn’t want you to know until you were older…I’m sorry I didn’t tell you before. I had hoped and prayed that George would finally snap out of it…be a good father.” she says. 

“He doesn’t have a loving bone in his body. I’m so sorry, honey.” she says, barely above a whisper. 

My mom didn’t die from her health issues. 

She died feeling worthless. 

She died from a broken heart. 

I sigh, letting my eyes squint shut as I lean onto Matt’s shoulder. I feel his lips press against the top of my head, his hand grazing up and down on my upper arm with a soothing touch. 

“I…there’s something else we need to tell you.” Matt announces softly. 

My eyes flicker open, confused, as I look up at Matt. My lips part with a loss of words as my gaze darts to Era. She looks at her lap, nodding gently. 

“George…he, um…I don’t know if I should tell you this now.” Era mumbles. 

I lean forward, out of Matt’s shoulder. I run my hands over my face with pure exhaustion as my emotions fall numbly in my chest with a heavy weight. “Just tell me…please.” I mutter. 

Era looks at me, her eyes shifting towards Matt’s with a sympathetic worry plastered on her face. “I don’t know…” she expresses. 

Matt’s fingers dance along my arm, stuttering as he shifts his weight on the sofa. “She…she deserves to know. It’s a lot, but,” his eyes flicker down, meeting mine with a somber sadness. “--you deserve to know.” he finishes. 

I hug my lips tightly together as I let my gaze wander back towards Era. Her eyes meet mine, a bitter tug of her lips appearing as she shakes her head back and forth. 

“He wasn’t trying to get sober for you. He…he isn’t a good person. He’s selfish, manipulative, and he’s just…he’s just selfish.” she says. 

I knew he didn’t love me. I knew he didn’t care about me. I knew too much, too much of things that kept me up at night, wondering why I wasn’t enough. 

My heart slows in my chest as Era peers into my eyes. The bitter sympathy laced in her features as she scrunched her nose. “He’s…he’s dying.” 

He’s dying?

As my mind danced around the announcement, pieces clicked into perfect places. The landscape of the truth made complete sense, a sad blue strained across a canvas of rage and guilt. 

He didn’t love me. I looked like her. I looked like the woman he sucked the life out of, draining her soul of hope. Guilt gnawed on his flesh with every interaction we ever had. The more I grew up, the more I grew into her features. 

I had always been happy to look just like my mother.

But, if I hadn’t, would he love me?

I shut out the thought. The taunting question being shunned with the living fact of his selfish greed performing on a dark stage. 

He wasn’t getting better for me. He was getting better for himself. Nothing I ever did was good enough to make him care—because he simply couldn’t care for anything that showed true love or compassion. 

My mom’s heart laid still in her grave. The gentle pummel against her chest was too much, a pain greater than the years of fighting her own body to live. 

His heart stayed beating. The weak drum in his body created nothing other than a survival instinct, a habit forced by a power greater than others. 

I hadn’t ever believed in god. I had been bitter, cursing the greater power for bringing such heavy circumstances to those who never seemed to deserve it, like my mom. The anger bellowed in my gut through the thick cloud of shock. 

I didn’t deserve this. I didn’t deserve to be strung along, saving the last bit of food for him as he cursed me out, pulling on my hair. It didn’t matter if it was an accident. It still hurt. 

“I’ll give you time to process things, but,” Era walks over, caressing my shoulder as she plants herself on the sofa. Her knee grazes mine as the shift in weight pulls my weight towards her, the side of my body still gently resting on Matt. “--I’m here if you need anything–even if you chose to go to LA.” she says. 

Her eyes pronounce truth with a genuine caring glow. I let my body lean towards her as Matt’s arm falls from my shoulders. I let my arms wrap around her neck in a lazy hug as my limbs rest lifelessly on her figure. A heavy sigh leaves my mouth. As the air falls from my lips, I feel her arms squeeze around me tightly. 

“I’m so sorry,” she says, her voice cracking. I feel a damp wetness landing on my shoulder. I hug her tighter, my muscles building courage from her broken tone. “I wanted to be there for you, I really did. But–” a cry leaves her lips, breaking the cloud of numbness as my heart clenches with devastation. 

I inhale sharply, forgetting to breathe as a tear streaks down my face. “--I didn’t know if I was enough anymore. You got so angry–I just wanted to tell you, but I knew I couldn’t. I didn’t know how to help, I hated him so much, I couldn’t stand watching him break your heart over and over again…I couldn’t watch you be her. I couldn’t–” 

“I forgive you. I…” the sniffle escapes as a stream of tears fall into her light blouse. I go to pull away, but her arms tighten. The action makes the loud sob leave my lips. “I love you, I’m so sorry. I–”

“Shhh,” she soothes, rubbing her hand along my back. “--it’s okay, you didn’t know. I love you so much, I—I don’t even consider Hailey to be my first daughter, you know,” she laughs lightly, sniffling. “--I told my husband that when we first started dating. He,” her sudden laugh catches contagiously as I let out a synchronized giggle, hugging her impossibly closer. 

“He had to comfort me so many nights. I would cry and sob for hours, wondering if you were okay, ashamed I had left you….but, I knew I couldn’t take you away from George, it had to be your choice. He is your father. I just–I love you, kid.” 

Era pulls back, letting her hands cup my cheeks. My hands hold onto her wrist as I lean into her touch. Her head tilts as our eyes meet, a laughter escaping in sync as she wipes the wet stains off my cheeks swiftly. 

I always hated the nickname 'kid'.’ It felt like an insult, a constant reminder of him and his harsh words that never seemed to have a purpose except to hurt me. Hearing it fall from her lips seemed to ease honey into the cracks in my heart, mending the sharp pieces back together partially, the pain subtly healing the ache in my chest.

It was barely noticeable compared to the thriving, stinging burn, but I could feel it. I could feel her words taking some of the pain and creating a golden memory worth a thousand words. 

“I know you’re not my mom, I don’t think I could ever call you that….but, you’re family to me, Era. I…I was an angry kid, but I was never angry at you. I was jealous of the time you got to have with her, but,” I sigh letting my eyes wander down to her shining necklace, shame surfacing in my mind. “--I was so upset with myself when I screamed at you. I’ve regretted it every time I’ve seen you.” I say.

My eyes flicker up towards her. My lips tug into a soft pout as I fight against the raging emotion of regret. “I’m sorry.” I breathe out. 

Her hands on my cheeks pull me forward, tilting my head down as her lips press against my forehead. Her chin rests above my head as her fingers caress my head. “I’m sorry too.” she expresses breathlessly. 

As I breathe in, the smell of her home intensifies. The sweet scent of vanilla seems to be expanding from her presence. 

Home.

The word had always been so haunting. I had been trying to make a house a home for years, willing a welcoming breeze of air to create the fresh scent of love and family. 

I didn’t have to anymore. 

My home leaked floral scents from Marylou’s garden, vanilla sugar cookies roamed the sweet smell and filled the entire space. A warm, fresh breeze of spring air drifted through each of the rooms in my mind. Pine and spices clouded the wood panels of the floor. The floor had once seemed so cold, so hard. Now, I wanted to grab a blanket, rest of the wooden planks and bathe in the sunlight from the windows. 

Home was a place in my mind where my heart had found peace. 

The structure itself wasn’t huge, but the walls and paint stored much more than just colors and textures. Memories and emotions were traced into each corner and crack in the floor. 

And a small baby blanket rested on the kitchen table, next to a bowl with a sweet batter inside of it. 

_

Matt’s arms twisted around me as we stood in front of the lake. I could hear the shuffling of the willow branches behind me, Marylou’s greenhouse’s roof peeking over and through some of the trees. The sun was sinking, a golden glow casting on the rippling water. 

The deck creaked from beneath our swaying feet. “I know everything was overwhelming. I’m sorry I pushed so much on you at once, I just, you deserve the truth.” 

I tilt my head upward, seeing Matt’s pale blue eyes looking down at me with intent. “I…thank you, Matt. I really mean it, thank you.” I let out. I sigh, “--the truth hurts less than secrets and lies. Even though it does hurt, I know it will get better—especially with you, out in LA.” I say. 

Matt’s eyes widen with hope before his face falters with a questioning look. “Wait, you don’t have to. Things have changed, we haven’t even gone to visit yet. Let yourself pro–” 

I cut him off, leaning on the balls of my feet as my lips peck against his. My eyes gleam into his, letting him search for the lack of hesitancy in my aura. “I’m sure, Matt. I love you, I love your family, I love Madi…I just, I love making memories with you and I’m ready for new memories, ones I’m not even sure where to begin imaging.” I say, laughing lightly. 

His lips tug into a soft smile as I lean my feet flat on the ground again. “I love you,” he says. He leans forward, letting his forehead rest against mine. “--I love you so much.” he breathes out. 

I bring my hands up, caressing his cheeks softly. My eyes falter to my chipped nails as I feel my lips form into a subtle pout. Matt follows my gaze, pulling my wrists gently to look at my hands. 

He smiles up at me, a tooth-rotting grin apparent on his face. “Let’s go. I got more nail polish colors—ones you’ll love, I hope.” 

He turns around, pulling me in tow. 

My hand in his feels like a mold made from fate. Each step creates a pulsing in my chest, the wounds inside my heart curating together and mending excruciatingly slowly. 

The walk is silent. The fresh breeze continues as we walk into the home, making our way up into his room. I let myself fall onto his bed as he shuffled around the room. 

Although the door is shut, I hear the slight sound of Chris’s voice yelling into his monitor. 

“--fucking bitch! I’m coming after your ass like ants at a fuckin’ picnic, motherfucker.” he says. I hold back a laugh as I see Matt walking towards me with his shoe box of nail polish. 

He sits down on the bed. As he pulls open the box, I gasp at the amount. The once half full box now seemed to be overflowing with various shades of greens and blues, along with a smaller handful of other colors.

“Which one do–”

“Matt! Why’d you get so many?!” I exclaim, cutting him off. 

His eyes swiftly meet mine, falling back to the box as he shrugs softly. “--wanted to get more for you. I love painting your nails.” he explains. 

I fail at fighting back the warm smile that crawls onto my face. “You didn’t have to do all of that, oh my god, thank you. They’re all so pretty.” I say, looking at the small glass bottles. 

Matt pulls up a bottle, a muted, forest green polish inside. My eyes widened at the beautiful color, my hands clasping around the small bottle mindlessly. “Woah, it’s so pretty.” I let out. 

I see Matt smile as I focus on his face. “I knew for sure you’d like that one, or—” he rummages through, the clanks of the bottles echoing in the room. He pulls up a perfect blue, a hue that matches his eyes beautifully. “--this one. Well, or any of them in here, but I knew you’d like these two a lot. Which one?” he asks, holding out the two bottles. 

My eyes flicker back and forth as I question which color to choose. I bite the inside of my cheek, my mind refusing to conclude on a decision. 

“Want both? I could do every-other nail, or whatever you want.” he cheers. 

I nod with a soft grin, holding out my hand. “Do whatever, I trust you.” I say. 

I really trust him. 

_

The wet paint on my nails was drying slowly as we talked. The light laughter echoed in the room as we leaned closer and closer to each other. I laid against his shoulder, laying my hands on top of my bent knees as his hair tickled against my forehead. 

“Thank you, they’re beautiful.” I express. Matt hums, his head vibrating from the slight noise as it rests on top of mine. 

I look at the shiny, damp paint coating my nails. A light, forest green and a cool blue decorate my fingernails, every other nail being painted with different hues. My cuticles were clean, neat of any imperfections. Not a single dent in the paint, completely perfect paint strokes that melted into one cohesive smooth surface on my nail bed.

It felt as perfect as it looked. 

Until I heard his voice in my head. 

Georges’s angry voice slipped in the cracks of my mind, bellowing the happiness into a pit of devastation. 

He would’ve hated this. Nail polish was a waste of money, something so useless that it brought rage to his tone when even seeing the paint on my hands for the first time. 

I had already slowly come to terms, stomaching the fact that my father was no longer my father. He had never really felt like it anyhow.

But something had shifted. 

The once burning rage of anger had clouded me with a taunting guilt. 

A man laying on his deathbed, rotting in his own guilt for years, was being tortured by my anger. 

But I had been tortured by him for years. 

His words, his actions, his everything. All of it was torture, a slim thread that threatened to break at the will of a mediocre river current. It had finally snapped, but at what cost?

Would I turn into a muddled pile of regret and guilt as soon as he could no longer utter the strength to spit the rage into my face? 

Was it selfish to think that way?

“Hey,” Matt’s voice rings me back to reality. “--what are you thinking so hard about? Don’t keep it all in, talk to me. You can’t go through this alone.” he says. 

I bite the inside of my cheek, pulling my head up and off of his shoulder slowly. I look over, catching his searching eyes. I swallow thickly, fiddling my fingers on top of my knees as I stare off at the closed door in front of us. 

“I,” I clear my throat, the words threatening to spill into a fountain of tears. “--I…I don’t know how to feel, Matt.” I confess. 

The lack of response sends my eyes over to his, catching his chest heaving with a sigh. His hand reaches up, caressing the top of my shoulder gently. “Do you want to journal?” he asks, reaching over and pulling his notebook up. 

I look down at my wet nails, contemplating. 

“I, I just think I want to talk to you, but I don’t know how much sense it will make…” I say, my voice carrying a strain of hesitancy. I hear Matt set the book back down on his nightstand, turning his attention back towards me. His hand reaches upward, caressing the back of my hair and rubbing gently on my back. 

“It doesn’t have to make sense, it’s okay.” he says. 

The comfort of his words rolls over my body as I take a deep breath. “I’m so mad. I hate him, I really, really hate him. I don’t want to say goodbye, I don’t even want to look at his face. I–” my voice gets caught in my throat as I blink back hot tears. “--I’m sick of this. I just want to heal, move on, but I feel so much guilt….I mean, what if I hate myself for never telling him I forgive him, Matt?” I ask, shifting my gaze to meet him. 

His somber eyes melt into mine. He opens his arms, but I hesitate, looking down at the shiny nails. “Hey,” I look back at him. “--I’ll fix them if I need to, they’re almost dry.” he says. 

I shake my head. “I don’t wanna get any paint on your–” 

My words strain from the sudden motion. Matt’s arms tightly enclose around my body as I freeze, gently putting my hands on his back and pressing him closer. The hot tears swell, foggy my vision. 

“I don’t care, just let it all out, I’m here for you.” 

His words seem to break the will of holding back. The hot fountain of tears falls from my eyes, spilling down on his shirt as I clutch tighter onto him. 

“You’ll be okay again, I promise. I know it doesn’t feel like that right now–but, I promise you, you will be.” he whispers gently, his palm caressing the back of my head as his other hand pulls my back closer to him. 

The loud sniffle echoes as I try to catch my breath. “How…how do you know that? What if it’s–what if it’s not?” My voice wavers with uncertainty and sadness. 

“--because you’re you. You’re so unbelievably strong. Look at everything you’ve gone through–don’t give up before you get to experience all the good in the world. I promise you, I will do my best everyday to show you how deserving you are of good things, okay? I’ve never broken a promise in my life, well…” he trails off as I let out a sniffle, laughing lightly. 

“Yeah, you did promise you wouldn’t read what I wrote in your journal.” I say, reminiscing on the memory. 

His chest rumbles with laughter against me. I feel him pull me impossibly closer, leaning my head against his as he sighs out. “I know, but I had to make sure you were okay. I’m sorry about breaking a promise, but I’m not sorry about doing it.” he says. 

I feel him pull back slightly, his lips pressing against the side of my head before he brings me back into his tight arms. “I’d break any promise if it meant keeping you safe.” he whispers. 

My heart melts at the words, finding the security and warmth in his voice that I had searched for endlessly for years and years. The honey flowed effortlessly from his lips as the ache in my chest seemed to dull with a relieving sigh. 

“I love you.” I state. 

Matt clings onto me tighter, making a soft squeeze fall from my lips. “Sorry,” I laugh at his antics as he releases some of the tension in his grip. “--I love you….so much. I…do you want to come with me actually?” he says, pulling back to look at me. 

I nod, looking at him with a questioning gaze as he stands up and offers me a hand. I slide my hand into his. He reaches down, pulling out a foreign object from his nightstand drawer and shoving it in his pocket.

“What’s that?” I question. 

He shrugs, shaking his head with a small smile. “You’ll find out, come on.” 

He tugs my hand as he opens the door to his bedroom. As we walk through the house, Chris’s small curses echo with frustration, making me let out a small snicker. I make a mental note to tease him for it as our footsteps continue. 

After slipping through the backdoor, the sunset comes into view. A pale blue fading into an orange paints the sky beautifully as the vibrant, spring grass surrounds the familiar dirt path. 

As the lake comes into view, I let my eyes gleam at it with a soft love for the place. Matt tugs my hand, our pathway clambering to the blooming willow tree. I smile as I watch him walk in front of me, guiding me as he inserts his arm through the tangled branches. 

“Go ahead, sweetheart.” he motions with a nod of his head. 

My pulse quickens, but not with fear. The once daunting branches now only brought excitement. I wasn’t scared of getting pricked by a thorn, I knew I was safe with him. 

I step through the void, hearing the branches shake as he drops them behind himself. I turn around, seeing him reach into his pocket. He clenches something in his fist, sitting on the ground and patting the dirt with patchy, thin grass next to him. 

“What are you planning?” I tease, sitting down. 

“We never carved our initials into the tree. I want that memory with you.” he states. 

My lips form into a slight pout at his promising words. The object in his hand flicks out as he fiddles with it, a small pocket knife blade coming into view. 

I look towards the rough bark, admiring the text carved in the middle of the tree in a heart. 

BE MINE? 

I smile at the memory, bringing my attention back to the present as I hear him start the chisel away at the wood. 

As he draws one straight line down, I place my head against his shoulder. He stops his actions, smiling softly at me before digging the knife carefully through the wood. 

Time passes beautifully as he continues to draw into the bark. The night breeze crawls, replacing the sunset with looming stars peering through the willow tree. The last glow of sunlight bellows just above the horizon, disappearing more and more with each passing second. 

My eyes gleam lovingly at the sight of our initials carved into the tree as he switches the blade closed, shoving it in his pocket. 

“You didn’t even let me help.” I point out. 

He shrugs, wrapping an arm around me as we both stare, admiring the art decorated into the wood. “I didn’t want you to get hurt at all, this wood is very splinte-prone, sweetheart. Trust me, not your comfort zone.” he mentions. 

I laugh, leaning into his side as his arm squeezes around my shoulders. “You are my comfort zone, Matt.” I whisper out. I hear his breath stutter from his mouth, bringing my head up. My eyes meet his, a pure love oozing from his pale blue eyes as the stars reflect in his dilating pupils. 

“I love you.” he states, pulling up his other hand to caress the side of my jaw. 

I lean into the touch, letting my eyes close with bliss. 

Everything is going wrong, chaos is curated in every corner of reality. 

Not here, not with him.

My envy, my fears, my anger. 

Everything, even my sadness fades as our eyes meet. 

Everything will be okay. 

The thought in my mind is spoken in his voice. 

With adoration, I let my hand reach up, brushing back his hair and leaning closer. Our forehead met as my eyes stayed glued on his. 

“I love you.” I say back. 

His hand on my jaw wraps around, gently titling and bringing my face towards his. Our lips meet, a dance of love creating passion between each movement. His lips envelope softly around mine, my breath hitching in my chest as I chase his movements. 

He hums against my lips. A soft smack of our lips echoes as he pulls away, leaning his head against mine. “--love you so much.” he repeats. 

I take the words in, watching his eyelashes blink. I shiver as they brush against my own. The tickling sensation sends us both in a fit of soft laughter. I lean back into his shoulder, the moon the only source of light with the stars peering through the tree branches as we both admire the two letters with a small heart in between. 

My eyes flicker upward again as his warmth radiates onto me, contradicting the cool breeze. 

BE MINE? 

The larger heart stands above the new design. The old memory–not being replaced, but added to the new. 

Everything will be okay. 

@sturniolosmind @freshloveforthefit @gnxosblog @sturnreblog @milasturniolo @mattscokewhore @melanch0lybby @stars4matt @samandcolbyfan22 @ruedowney @iluvm4ttsturni0l0 @greatooglymooglyyy

@txssvx @junnniiieee07 @sturnstvs @sturnioloblogs @sunsetsturniolos @flowerxbunnie @rootbeerworshiper @sturniolohoe @mayhem-7-blog @braindead4l @lovergirl4387 @hearts4chriss @1horrormoviewhore1

@mattslolita @hearts4chris @nicksmainbitch @imfromthediningtable @st7rnioioss @sturniololol @nedsmarie44 @tomskookie @itssophiasstuff @chrissystur @chrisstankyleg @cloudykitten2004

@abruuu01 @riasturns @strnilolo @chrissystur @lrs-jenkinson

@yourfavoritefangirl @stonermattsgf @x3rox @cookiehaos

@iloveneilperry @lullvu @chrattstromboli @sstvrnioloo @seahorsie11

@sturnzsblog @sturnikitty @sturniol0s @sturnioloa @stasiesturn

@imwetforyourmom @matty-bear @pinklittleflower @mattsaq

@realuvrrr @sofiaannaleise @ariieeesworld @chrisstankyleg @hiraethlimerence

@ryli3sworld @wtpdhoe @eileenhou @lov3bug @jamiesturniolo

@jake-and-johnnies-slut @lovesodakid @simply-a-simper

@graysturns @glassesmattsbae @sturnsfav @unbruisable @dsturniolo

@sofie-1 @timmyscomputer @sturniolo-fav-matt @millyswife @ash-gaming13

@strmbolisworld @shaquilles-0atmeal @ribread03 @sturniolo04

@strnilolo @chrattstromboli @veysxrge @matthemunch44 @giannasturn

*click yes to actually watch the edits*

WATCH VIDEO ?

yes. no.

COMMENTS:

@ y/n

it’s me guys, i’m people 🤭

@lustfulslxt

the things i’d let that man do to me

-> @ y/n the things i’ve let that man do to me

-> @sleepysturnss OH ????

-> @sturncakez care to share w the class 🤨

@sophssturn

MATT + CARNIVAL IS SO 😫

-> @xoxo4chrisss I’M SAYINGGG

@ y/n

is it crazy to say that i moaned at this edit ??

-> @mattsneezing yes (same)

-> @mbbsgf it’s ok i moan every time i see matt 😋

-> @mattslolita i’ve found my people 🥰

@chr1sgirl4life

i’m a chris girl, i’m a chris girl, i’m a chris girl

-> @ y/n that wasn’t very convincing girl

-> @venusxsturnio it’s ok to love them both

-> @ y/n ok katherine pierce 😍

WATCH VIDEO ??

yes. no.

COMMENTS:

@ y/n

my eyes just rolled into the back of my head

-> @ mattsturniolo proof ? 👀

-> @freshloveee oh my !

-> @queen161718 MATT 😭

-> @starsturniolo i feel like i’m interrupting

@ y/n

THE RINGS THE RINGS THE RINGS I’M GONNA PASS OUT OH MY GOD

-> @ mattsturniolo this is why i wear them

-> @defnotayonna awww how sweet

-> @ y/n no not sweet he’s trying to kill me 😫

@robins-scoop

i’m in love with matt’s fits

-> @smoothies-are-cool i’m in love with matt’s face

-> @55sturn i’m in love with matt’s tats

-> @ y/n i’m in love with matt

-> @urmom2bitch i’ll be sleeping on the side of the highway tn !

@ y/n

this song is actually me @ matt

-> @sturniolowhore this song is actually me @ u

-> @hearts4chriss nah real cs chris is my man but matt ???? good lord 😮‍💨 (don’t tell chris)

-> @ y/n ok i won’t girl !! (@ christophersturniolo)

-> @ christophersturniolo this is why i have commitment issues 😕

WATCH VIDEO?

yes. no.

COMMENTS:

@ y/n

the amount of times i’ve made matt do push-ups in front of me bc of that one clip 😫

-> @bernardenjoyer girl next time record it tf ??

-> @ y/n who says i didn’t ????

-> @readerakayourname sharing is caring babe

-> @nikolastrn gatekeeping isn’t nice

-> @ y/n i fear i’m just not ready to share yet

@breeloveschris

my man is just so 😫

-> @ y/n aren’t you a nate girl ?? worry about him 😒

-> @rootbeerworshiper exactly like stay away from MY man tf

-> @ y/n nah girl nice try tho

-> @luverboychris my man’s brother looks so good here

-> @ y/n yesss there we go, chris is all yours bae

-> @ christophersturniolo DID YOU JUST GIVE ME AWAY ??? 😟

-> @ y/n uh….no 😄

WATCH VIDEO ??

yes. no.

COMMENTS:

@ y/n

GOD DAMN MY MAN IS FIIINNEEEE 😫

@ nicolassturniolo the way i just watched y/n fall to the floor while watching this

-> @endereies SHE’S SO REAL FOR THIS

-> @raysmayhem-72 she’s me, i’m her

-> @ christophersturniolo YOU EVER MAKE A BITTY HIT HER KNEESSSS

-> @ y/n chris stfu hoe you literally fell to the floor too

-> @ christophersturniolo CAUSE YOU PUSHED ME ??

-> @patscorner stop fighting guys, can’t we all just get along ??

-> @ y/n tell chris to stop and i will

-> @bernardsbendystraws nah keep fighting y’all, this is my chance to snatch matt up from y/n

-> @bueckerssturns you go, i’ll keep her distracted

-> @ y/n Y’ALL KNOW I CAN SEE YOUR COMMENTS RIGHT 😭

-> @junnniiieee07 you’re dreaming rn none of this is even happening

-> @ y/n NOT YOU TRYING TO GASLIGHT ME

-> @ christophersturniolo gaslighting isn’t real you’re just crazy

-> @ y/n i swear to god chris

WATCH VIDEO ??

yes. no.

COMMENTS:

@ y/n

i’m on my knees for this man

-> @ mattsturniolo aren’t you always ??

-> @teapartyprincess4two the way my jaw DROPPED

-> @imwetforyourmom OH MY GOD ???

-> @chrisloyalgf god, it’s me again 😔

@ christophersturniolo

just watched y/n add this to her matt folder of over 3k edits 😍

-> @ y/n the next time you ask me for a ride i’m letting your ass walk

-> @yamamasjumpercables WHY DID CHRIS EXPOSE HER LIKE THAT 😭

-> @vanteguccir this is what i mean when i say me and y/n would be best friends

-> @selenascorner me and y/n might actually be the same person

@ y/n

chris over here acting like he doesn’t have a matt folder of his own…

-> @ christophersturniolo i’m done with this app for the day 😒

-> @chrisstopherfilmed chris just got ate tf up

-> @bbglmfao she clocked him quick too

@evieolo

watching chris and y/n beef in the comments under matt edits is the highlight of my day

-> @l0ser43v3r they’re always exposing each other 😭

-> @ineedchriscock matt is always lurking and just watches it

-> @ y/n he thrives off of watching the chaos

-> @ mattsturniolo you’re not wrong

CREDITS:

@ m6ttfilms on tiktok

@ hcrrysgf on tiktok

@ stvrnielo on tiktok

@ skyesturniolo on tiktok

@ .sturniolocentral on tiktok

MATT’S POV

when my eyes fluttered open, i was immediately met with a pillow that wasn’t mine. i knew this pillow though, and those sheets.

i had forgotten where i was momentarily, until i looked over and saw her. her eyes were closed, lips parted slightly while she slept peacefully.

she looked angelic, the soft rays of the sun seeming to make her glow. she moved around in her sleep last night, leaving her barely covered by her blanket.

i couldn’t help but let my eyes wander her body, taking in every feature. her smooth skin was littered with dark marks all over, and the blanket left little to the imagination. before i knew it, i was hard again.

it took everything in me to fight the urge i had to take care of it right there next to her. what would she think if she woke up to me jerking myself off to her sleeping form?

oh my god, what was gonna happen when she woke up? she would want to talk about what this meant for us, but i couldn’t handle that.

what if this was a one time thing? what if she wanted nothing to do with me after this ? did i fuck up our friendship? i had to get out of there.

i got up quickly and quietly, careful not to make any noise while i got dressed. when i was done, i pulled her blanket over her so she was fully covered. i looked around for a pen and paper to leave her a note, as i didn’t want her to get the wrong idea.

ok, she has nothing to write a note with. i’ll just leave her a text.

well i could have done that, if i had realized i completely forgot my phone in her room before i left. i didn’t make this realization, however, until i had gotten back home.

so not only did she think i was the type of guy to fuck and dip, but i also couldn’t avoid the conversation that i was running from in the first place.

it’s not that i never wanted to talk about it, i just wasn’t ready for our friendship to change yet.

was running away the best way to handle the situation? definitely not, but i only had so much time to decide what to do before she woke up.

so basically, my overthinking ended up screwing me over. doesn’t it always ?

what was wrong with me? this was the girl who made me feel safe and loved, and now i couldn’t even talk to her. how did i manage to fuck up this badly?

one choice. one choice stemming from my fantasy-filled thoughts is all it took. and the decision i made last night led to more poorly made choices. choices that i wouldn’t have made had my brain not been corrupted by her.

her face, her smell, those perfect little moans that fell off her lips, she had a way of making me ignore every logical thought that my brain produced. i was so desperate to finally have her in the way i’d only dreamed about for years.

now if i didn’t fix this, i wouldn’t have her in any way.

———

READER’S POV

when i woke up, matt was gone. the spot where he had slept next to me was cold, meaning he hadn’t been there for a while.

for a second, i questioned whether last night was even real. had i really fallen so deep into my delusions that i started to believe them? i found the thought to be worrisome, but i tried not to dwell on it as i got up and made my way to the bathroom.

when i caught a glimpse of the hickeys decorating my skin i felt relief wash over me. i wasn’t going crazy. just as quickly as it came, the relief was replaced with a new feeling; embarrassment.

i seriously let myself think that he would want something more. hell, he marked me like he did. but he didn’t treat me like i was his best friend, he treated me like i was a one night stand.

maybe he had a valid reason for leaving. i tried to talk myself out of the rabbit hole of assumptions i was about to go down, and picked up my phone.

once a few hours had passed without him returning my texts or calls, i knew. he was done with me, he had to be. why else would he just leave without warning and ghost me?

i should’ve know this was going to happen, people always leave me in the end. it just never occurred to me that matt could be just like everyone else.

——

MATT’S POV

when i got to her house, i let myself in using the key she had given me. “y/n?” i called her name, not receiving an answer.

i pulled out the ice cream i had bought her on the way to her place, putting it in the freezer for her.

when i got to her room, she happened to be fresh out of the shower. she wore nothing but a towel, her eyes widening when she saw me.

“matt?” she asked before rushing over to me, pulling me into a tight hug. the water droplets that coated her skin soaked into my t-shirt, but all i could focus on was the fact that she was in my arms.

i inhaled the scent of her fruity body wash, eyes falling shut as i rubbed her back soothingly.

she then pulled away, smacking me upside the head with her heavy hand. “don’t do that again matt, i thought i scared you off. i thought you hated me- i thought i lost my best friend”

i cupped her cheek gently, “i could never hate you, and i’m not going anywhere. i was just overwhelmed, but i shouldn’t have just left life that. i’m sorry, i was gonna leave a note, but then i couldn’t find anything to write with. and i was gonna text you but i left my phone here and-”

“matt, it’s ok. i’m just glad that you’re here now” she whispered. “but there’s nothing to be scared of, i mean- last night was just the heat of the moment, right? i mean, it had to be, why else would you leave like that” she whispered the last part to herself.

shit. this was the problem, i didn’t know what the night before was.

i didn’t know what i wanted, and i didn’t want to hurt her in the process of figuring it out. what i did know, was i wasn’t going to lose her because i got greedy. so, i decided i would figure it out later, but for now: “yeah, that’s all it was”

“so, we’re good?” she asked. “we’re good” i confirmed.

“good. then i’m gonna get dressed and then we can watch something?” she posed the last part of the sentence as a question.

“yeah, and i brought you ice cream” i told her, watching her face light up at the news. “wow, you thought you really messed up, huh?” she asked as she grabbed her clothes to change into.

“i did really mess up, but i won’t do anything like that again” i told her. she just smiled at that letting out a quick, “i know” before moving to go back into her bathroom.

“wait, you’re seriously going into another room to get changed? did you forget how we spent last night together?” i joked. admittedly, it was probably a little too soon to crack jokes like that.

“last night never happened” she spoke before closing the door.

shit, why did that sting a little?

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