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Brittany… I hope you’re okay. I hate that this is where I find to be the only place I can talk about you. You’ve made some big mistakes.. you’re stuck… you’re lost.. you’ve been missing for a year, I can’t find you, maybe that’s how you want it, maybe you’re embarrassed.. but I still love you. I used to think these other women had their claws in me.. not like you. I hope to god you’re okay. I don’t care about what you’ve done, or are currently doing to survive. I forgive you, just come home to me. I’d like you to meet my son, and daughter. I feel you near me, I miss your hugs and I miss you in my arms. You aren’t on here but maybe speaking it into the universe will bring you back to me. Let go of that bullshit Britt… come home baby. Be okay. In this life or the next, I hope I see you again.

Who would have thought at 26, I'd wish for a do over. I'm not happy with most of the decisions I've made that have affected my life. But mostly I want to go back and charish the time I had, not only for my own mortality but now that I'm faced with a word that is much less bright and to know the biggest and brightest light I have left might be going out sooner rather than later, living this and thinking of the loved ones who I'm missing I would spend every waking second with you, I felt that way the moment I saw you over a decade ago and it hasn't changed..... I hate this place, this world, these people. Don't take her too.. not yet.. I'm not that strong.