𝔧𝔬𝔰𝔰𝔩𝔶𝔫 𝔡𝔢 𝔠𝔩𝔞𝔦𝔯𝔢

Courteous, quite naturally so; she’d been raised to certain standards of etiquette, clearly. Even with her lessers. Though, that was quite possibly Josslyn, not her parents, or governesses and tutors, and whoever else had a hand in bringing up a courtly lady. “I do appreciate the understanding, all the same.” 

“Awfully intelligent, it’s true. Not so clever as they might believe they are, but. That’s rather human of them, don’t you think?” Geban keened, as if in dismay, and Esker chuckled. “Oh, yes. He’s quite fond of cats. More of a challenge than dogs, I suppose…” They rounded another cobbled corner, rambling through the Aisle’s mismatched streets. “And you best believe their memory’s all that. Crows, they won’t just remember you. They’ll hold a bloody grudge. As long as they live.” Another thing they had in common. Not that the Lady de Claire had any need to fret about that. 

“Ah, but I do believe congratulations are in order, aren’t they?” He grinned, warmly, crutching along with this odd little cavalcade of theirs. “I’ve heard you’re to be married. To the Eagle Knight, no less.” The crow whistled, perhaps in approval. Or to be a dreadful brat. “An exciting time, isn’t it? Busy, too, I imagine…” Let her answer as she liked. Or not. He’d learn at least a little, either way. Such an unusual pair, those two…

“It sure is,“ she agreed before looking at the crow, right in time of him voicing his dismay, and added, “I’m sorry, Geban.“ It was fascinating how he seemed to understand what they were saying, and all of that was because he read the tones of their voices and emotions, Josslyn assumed. “If I was a crow, I’d probably go for cats too. A dog would be too predictable. But a cat on the other hand... They are clever and sometimes could be quite deceitful animals when it comes to hunting. I see how it could be more interesting with cats.“ It was a bit strange topic to discuss, now that she thought about it, but she didn’t mind. “Let’s hope I don’t get on his bad side,“ she smiled.

For a second she was a little confused, why should he congratulate her? And then it hit her. The engagement. It was just a temporary arrangement where both of them could get what they want - Ezrai would pay his debt to the de Claires and Josslyn would have time to find the man she could love and marry. But she hated to lie to people. So she tried to stick to the most honest replies she could give.

     ELENA  SOFTENED  AT  THE  MENTION  OF  THE  TRADE.  she  knew  as  good  as  anyone  the  trouble  money  brought.  elena  preferred  the  trouble  of  more  money  ,  but  who  wouldn’t?  family  finances  were  a  complicated  ordeal  and  though  elena  had  her  own  trouble  with  ezrai  ,  she  was  happy  that  josslyn  had  one  good  thing  come  out  of  the  soured  deal.  “  tell  me  ,  ”  she  said  ,  trying  to  keep  her  tone  jovial  ,  “  did  he  sweep  you  off  your  feet?  ”     

     though  ,  elena  faltered  at  josslyn’s  observation.  her  friend  was  far  too  clever  for  her.  she  had  forgotten  what  it  meant  to  be  around  her  close  confidants.  a  life  of  travel  translated  into  solitude.  she  had  her  friends  across  the  kingdoms  ,  but  the  quiet  moments  of  her  journeys  ,  in  between  cities  ,  meant  time  spent  alone.  the  acquaintances  she  had  could  not  recognize  the  shifts  in  her  behavior  ,  not  like  good  friends  could.  

     still  ,  she  would  not  give  up  the  truth.  she  grinned  and  answered  ,  “  no  one  is  good  enough  for  you  ,  josslyn.  ”  her  fingers  traced  the  condensation  forming  around  her  cup  absentmindedly.  “  sir  ezrai  escorted  me  to  acacia  when  i  was  to  perform  there  for  the  court  .  .   .  i  was  only  surprised  to  hear  his  name  again.  ” 

     “i wish,“ she sighed with a small shake of her head and a soft laugh fell from her lips. ezrai was far from the romantic type, in fact he seemed to be quite the opposite. a hard-headed realist. and sometimes he drove her crazy with his stubbornness, but at the same time she enjoyed his company. “it happened over time, i started to gradually like him more and more.“ and it was not a lie. although she liked him as a person, as a friend from the very beginning, she saw the good in him and she didn’t see him as the traitor others did. the true love and the one was missing, but nobody had to know. it was between josslyn and him. although... she did seem to be a bit fond of him lately. but it was probably just because they had been spending more time together due to being engaged.

𝐁𝐀𝐑𝐁𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐀𝐍  »  toothy  grins  ,  stories  around  the  campfire  ,  clothes  covered  in  pet  hair  ,  hot  temper  ,  old  jeans  ,  heartbeat  in  head  ,  potatoes  and  steak  ,  beaded  jewelry  ,  bruises  like  galaxies  ,  mementos  ,  backpack  stuffed   full  ,  craigslist  furniture  ,  spontaneous  road  trips  ,  air  ripped  from  lungs

𝐁𝐀𝐑𝐃  »  homemade  bread  ,  white  lies  ,  easily excited  ,  trying on hats  ,  band  geek  ,  pep  talks  ,  no  impulse  control  ,  sunsets  ,  vintage  fashion  ,  long  showers  ,  selfies  ,  following  dreams  ,  rosy  cheeks  ,  song  mash  - ups  ,  pink  lemonade  with  tequila  ,  loves  easily  ,  animated  storyteller  ,  full  of  comebacks

𝐂𝐋𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐂  »  list  of  wishes  ,  biting  their  tongue  ,  band  -  aids  and  neosporin  ,  shoulder  to  cry  on  ,  morning  sun  ,  necklaces  ,  trial  and  error  ,  homemade  quilts  ,  formal  clothing  ,  astrology  fan  ,  messages  in  bottles  ,  pleated  braids  ,  speaking  up  for  friends  ,  feathers  ,  motivational  quotes  ,  vivid  dreams

𝐃𝐑𝐔𝐈𝐃  »  bird  watching  ,  shy  kid  ,  wind  chimes  ,  trying  to  whistle  ,  summer  camp  ,  apple  orchards  ,  lost  in  their  head ,  glow  in  the  dark  stars  on  the  ceiling  ,  hoodies  ,  thrift  shopping  ,  saving  worms  off  the  sidewalk  ,  pig  latin  ,  bare  feet  ,  thunderstorms  ,  numb  fingers  ,  braided  hair  ,  naming  potted  plants

𝐅𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓𝐄𝐑  »  goose  bumps  ,  leather  jackets  ,  adventure  ,  chewing  nails  ,  cares  deeply  but  can’t  show  it  ,  bronze  locks  ,  no sleep  ,  taste  of  iron  ,  netflix  binges  ,  never  forgets ,  combat  boots  ,  stories  behind  scars  ,  table  for  one  ,  official  soundtracks  ,  sore calves  ,  trusts  themselves  the  most

𝐌𝐎𝐍𝐊  »  always  trying  to  be  better  ,  wanderlust ,  meditation  ,  sweat  pants  ,  old  photographs  ,  yoga  ,  sleeping  in  hammocks  ,  nostalgia  ,  minimalist  design  ,  breath  of  fresh  air  ,  baby  animals  ,  volunteering  ,  perfectionist  ,  doesn’t  care  about  fashion  ,  healthy  snacks  ,  noticing  the  little  things

𝐏𝐀𝐋𝐀𝐃𝐈𝐍  »  school  uniforms  ,  thick  jackets  ,  sleeping  with  the  windows  open  ,  logical  advice  ,  scrapbooking  ,  compasses  ,  i  fight  for  my  friends  ,  sculpture  gardens  ,  cold  morning  air  ,  big  soul  ,  likes  routine  ,  secret  romantic  ,  last  to  get  jokes  ,  sunflowers  ,  practical  presents  ,  misty  weather

𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐑  »  herbal  tea  ,  smell  of  rain  ,  blinking  away  tears  ,  camping  trips  ,  collecting  bones  ,  swiss  army  knives  ,  first  impressions  ,  anxious  thoughts  ,  bobby  pins  ,  burnt  marshmallows  ,  too  competitive  ,  clothes  lines  ,  messenger  bags  ,  holding  grudges  ,  gets  along  better  with  animals  than  people

𝐑𝐎𝐆𝐔𝐄  »  flirtatious  sarcasm  ,  candid  photos  ,  lost  phone  chargers  ,  adrenaline  rush  ,  picking  dirt  out  from  beneath  their  nails  ,  social  chameleon  ,  clashing  clothes  ,  self  -  deprecating  jokes  ,  claw  machines  ,  sits  in  chairs  wrong  ,   smudged  eyeliner  ,  has  too  many  sunglasses  ,  eats  nothing  or  everything

𝐒𝐎𝐑𝐂𝐄𝐑𝐄𝐑  »  infectious  laugh  ,  family  trees  ,  shivers  down  their  spine  ,  lipstick  and  roses  ,  mood  swings  ,  clumsy  ,  believing  in  destiny  ,  high  expectations  ,  sleeping  in  darkness  ,  collection  of  nail  polish  ,  passionate  ,  good  grades  but  never  studies  ,  poetry  books  ,  blowing  kisses  ,  not  knowing  their  own  strength

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐎𝐂𝐊  »  knowing  everyone’s  secrets  ,  backpack  covered  in  pins  ,  envy  ,  being  in  walmart  late  at  night  ,  earl  grey  ,  selective  memory  ,  conspiracy  theories  and  cryptids  ,  keysmashing  ,  need  to  know  basis  ,  can’t  cook  ,  bags  under  eyes  ,  experimental  art  ,  flickering  bulbs ,  black  clothing  all  year  long

𝐖𝐈𝐙𝐀𝐑𝐃  »  piles  of  textbooks  ,  cat  in  lap  ,  keeping  a  diary  ,  indecisions  ,  scented  candles  ,  studying  alone  in  a  café  ,  lingering  touches  ,  museum  dates  ,  unanswered  questions  ,  taking  on  too  much  responsibility  ,  collections  ,  chalk dust  ,  comfy  robes  ,  unnecessary  apologies  ,  coming  home  after  a  long  day

It seemed a little strange to have to go to an undisclosed location to treat a patient, but it was war and Josslyn was starting to learn not to question things. Some things were better left unknown if you wished to see another day.

It was her and one other nurse, accompanied by a few guards. They were led to an old farm house, that seemed to be unused for the last few years. There was a barely visible, faint light in one of the windows. Josslyn and the other nurse were led inside and to the patient, down the hallway and into one of the back rooms.

“You are making this so hard! I would have to say Wed Willow, Bed Elion and use the same tactics and fake Behead Kirian, but actually Bed him and then run away together.“

“You are making this so hard for me! I don’t want to behead anyone! Goodness gracious…“

“You know what? We all are going to run away, all four of us, just run away, we all get married to each other, one big happy family, and we will live happily ever after. That’s my answer!“

“It’s not good enough? Uh, fine.“

“Wed Ezrai, because reasons. Bed Esker, because world needs him. Behead Kirian, because… There is no reason other than he is the last one. I hate this…“

“I apologize in advance, I will go with what I have already answered before. Although…“

“This time Wed Josefin, Bed Elena, because that could be fun. And Behead Iryana. Once again, I am sorry!“

“Easy. Wed Esker. I have a feeling life would never be boring with him.“

“Bed Kirian, because he might either be gentle or rough, it is hard to tell and I kind of want to know, is it bad that I want to know? I think it probably is. I shouldn’t be thinking about it, really shouldn’t!“

“And that leaves with - Behead Dominic. Oh boy, I’m going to get in so much trouble for this…“

“Elena is trouble, but I don’t think I could live without her. Wed!“

“And now I’m stuck with yet another tough choice. I don’t want to behead either of them!“

“Fine. I’d Bed Josefin and pretend to Behead Willow, but it was not actually her, it was a lookalike doll and she’d be all safe and sound, and we’d run away and start a new life together somewhere. Yes, that is what I’d do. And Josefin should stay with her people, I’ve heard she’s truly compassionate and she cares for them so much, her people need her.“

“Since I am already engaged to Ezrai this choice is the easiest one - Wed. And since we would be married, that would also mean Bed. Two birds with one stone, am I right?“

“Now I’m left with Elion and Dominic and two other options - Bed and Behead. Method of exclusion. If I choose to behead Dominic, my own head will roll, I’m sure of that. So with that… Bed Dominic and Behead Elion. I’m sorry!“

“Josslyn,” he pleaded, but then it occurred to him, as she kept teasing him about calling her pretty, that perhaps she wasn’t just bringing it up to embarrass him.  Perhaps she’d…liked it.  “You much already know how beautiful you are.  But I suppose hearing someone else notice must be gratifying, to a Lady.”

He smiled, knowing then it would be her turn to blush.

He listened as she explained what she’d said to Faiza, how she meant it.  Her opinions and thoughts - something that Ezrai did respect her for sharing.  “You certainly made a good impression on my sister,” he noted.  “Not that I expected anything less. I know Faiza can sometimes be a little…intimidating. It’s a Gavilan trait - with certain people at least.”

He lay back then, knowing he needed at least a few more hours rest before he even tried to make the trip to the Eden border.  “Please - attend to whatever needs you have, and then if you like, I would be honoured to have you spend time with me for a while.  I may sleep again.  We can make the trip to the town in the late afternoon.”

While she enjoyed the teasing it somehow didn’t occurred to her that this game could be played both ways. Her eyes widened and a gasp fell over her lips. “I... — No, I, —  That was not... —“ She had lost the ability to speak so it seemed. Josslyn probably looked like a fish out of water. She looked away and it felt like her face was on fire. “Ha, ha, very funny,“ she murmured trying to sound sarcastic, but not quite accomplishing it. While what he said was not her goal, it did make her feel butterflies in her stomach hearing him call her beautiful.

For a while she couldn’t look him in the eye, because of how easily he noticed what she had missed and called her out on it. But it didn’t take long for her to regain her composure.

“Too bad I didn’t have time to get to know her better. She was intimidating indeed, but she’d the head of your Hold and ruler over so many lands, how could she not be,“ Josslyn shrugged.

Josslyn was being so light-hearted and teasing, and Ezrai liked to believe it was due to her trying to keep him distracted from his injury, his exhaustion, from the horrors and tenseness of the battlefield outside.  Perhaps it was something more than that…after all, the things she’d spoken to him the night before and the pendant currently hanging around his neck definitely hinted otherwise.

If only he knew a way to bring it up and talk about it with Josslyn.  But now was neither the time or place.  Ezrai couldn’t afford to indulge in his personal feelings - or even the feelings of others - when so many people’s survival was currently at stake.  There were more important things to deal with here, than the whimsy of romance.

So Ezrai took all of her pleasantries with small smiles in return, and decided to indulge in one small, almost minute pleasure - something no one could fault him for enjoying.  Eating together with Josslyn, a quiet moment of sharing a meal together.  It felt good, and Ezrai had learned a long time ago to appreciate moments like this, rare and brief as they could be in his long life.

“Alright.  So long as the doctors can afford to free you for a couple of days, then we’ll journey to the Eden border together.  Since you insist on looking after me as if I’m some injured lamb,” he said, giving her a sour face - but there was no malice in it, only complacency.  

“Once it’s in my head…” he murmured in agreement, finishing up his food.  Some quiet fell between them, before Ezrai observed,  “I suppose it’s in your nature to take care of others.  As the eldest girl in your family, and as a Lady-in-Waiting.  Tell me someting, Lady Josslyn - did you mean what you’d said to my sister, about my choice to work my way into the Kingsguard? Or were you just being diplomatic with Faiza?”

It surprised her a little how the silence between them felt so calming, so needed. It was nice. Nice to just sit and be in his company and enjoy their food. Lately all she knew was tending to the injured or traveling from the front to the back lines and back to the front, transporting necessities.

“An injured lamb, you say? Don’t you want a pretty nurse looking after you?“ she asked with a smug smile, being quite pleased with herself, how she managed to remind Ezrai again of him calling her pretty last night. “It’s mostly me who asks for things to do, since I am not a real, trained medic. I think at the moment there are enough hands to manage this tent without me for a few days.” All she had to do now was talk with the head of this tent and everything would be set.

The one time when she saw his stubbornness clearly was their meeting in the Center Aisle, discussing the arrangement. There was nothing she could say or do to make him change his mind, she felt so helpless she could scream, but that wouldn’t change a thing.

He was right, Josslyn was indeed used to taking care of others, her sister especially. Sometimes the de Claires weren’t the best parents, so Josslyn at a young age took it upon herself to take a good care of Madlen. Even if she was sometimes rebelling against Josslyn.