Joshua Nash Illustration

Making small talk is inevitably part of any holiday gathering. It can be awkward and painful relying on subjects like the weather and your failing career. Luckily, I have prepared a list of excellent topics, starters and segues to keep the conversation rolling painlessly along. Happy Thanksgiving!

1. “What do you suppose is the one thing keeping you from loving fully?”

2. “Let’s all rate our own gender fluidity.”

3. “We should be thankful, sure. But how free are we really in this day and age?”

4. “This Beaujolais is delicious! There's a reason the French are known for their wine. And for their bloody revolutions.” (Begin discussing the Barricades of 1848.)

5. “Do you ever stop to consider the absolute insignificance of all of this?”

6. “Kant would say that these candied yams exist first in a reality wholly separate from our own senses and perceptions.”

7. “Are you square with your mother?”

8. “Lately I’ve been dreaming of endless falling through a desolate void.”

9. “Do you think this turkey’s consciousness still exists on some level?”