Heart & Sleeve

The bitterness of you all—

Consuming, floundering and flopping

Drowning in my tear made puddles

Howling at the moon—

The lonely coyote sobs,

Waiting for it to return

The anguish and burn

Yet, the heart yearns—

The tapestry of you, is so beautiful

That perpetual blue wave—

My soul incased inside a cave,

The ocean clashing with my heart

I fell apart; never to escape,

My own revenge on oneself—

I love you, sun—

How I adore you my little bumble bee.

Look at all of your beauty.

You are so ever beautiful to me—

The subtle fragrances, the wind carrying

You throughout the gleaming world.

Everyone enjoying your presence,

It’s finally all about you.

It’s always been about you.

From the first day, to the next,

You bring joy, comfort, and

Charisma.

You are what beauty will always

Snorkeling in my thoughts, diving into life,

Holding my breath, till I say jump,

I’ve got the goods,

There’s no doubt,

You won’t diminish my confidence, you’ll only build me up, make me better than ever— you will try to chew me up, spit me out, but I’ll stick it out, I’ll bite your tongue with your own teeth, the world will hear your chatter, but I’ll be the one—

How dare I have feelings

How dare I feel what I feel

You’re so selfish and disgusting

How do you even breathe and exist

Just disappear, continue to be invisible—

I love plants,

I truly LOVE PLANTS,

I only know a few by name

Scientifically impeccable,

Rosa is her Name, derives from Latin where she came

Iris, with her beaming yellow eyes,

But royalty she knows best,

For all you truly see is indigo

Dahlia, she comes in many different ways,

Your eyes entranced as you watch her

Hips sway each way,

I love plants,

I TRULY LOVE PLANTS,

But like I said,

I can only name a few

I honestly can't believe this is happening

Like Moses spreading the sea

What rubbish, such disbelief

I don't even understand what's happening

Clueless to what's going on as my father shouts and screams to his favorite baseball team

I'm getting smeared, face first to the floor

Being held in contempt, prosecution and judgement, but it's not entitlement dangling its presence in my face

I just don't know if you want to see me any more...like really see me

The invisible man once again hits the comics with another clearance sticker ending its life cycle

I'm hurting, and if not that, then something deeper, something stronger and it's hard to form a name for such hurt and sadness

That child sitting on the bus by his lonesome self, the child misunderstood, mistreated

I'm terribly sorry that you deal with so much

I'm terribly sorry that you find me by the name of annoyance

Wish you saw me like you used to see me

I still see you, I always have and always will, so why don't you show me the same pleasure in time and in patience, why is unconditional love so hard for you to give away

I feel like you don't remember all I have done for you, the sacrifices, but sacrifices well worth making

Why has my value gone done

Will you see me again

Will you, or could this be the end

A new end to a new beginning, or a beginning meeting end of it all

Hearts will break and Cupid will feel like he had made a very bad mistake

He would shake and disagree and yell NO, NO, NO

His arrows shaped of hearts are straight and true and never wrong

Over and over I think and think, what is happening

What is going on this moment is supposed to be line with gold and pearls

See me--

Why won't you look at me--

I am not opaque nor invisible.

I do not dress in camouflage.

I do not lurk behind or within the shadows.

I crave and envy the attention others receive.

Uncontrollable behavior--

madness through cupids arrow--

What must I do--

I've been searching for your love--

for some time now.

Every crevasse leads to a dead end.

This cannot be a pointless battle.

Extend, and touch my hand once more.

When you struggle,

to articulate the emotions,

that penetrate—

the most annoying unbearable movement,

The Monuments Scream Out Your Name.

they crumble—

with resentment,

and no reservations.

I salute the man.

He, with the iced hand who holds the heart,

that is

heartless.

The beatless abyss of no rationale.

Synchronized oxygen—

tainted with confusion and illusions—

The beautiful thing we call—

Reality.

A glimpse of hell—

an entry to the atrocious helplessness.

I’m suffocating,

And no one can hear

My call out for relief—

The salt,

Evaporating from my lips—

Carried by

Thy

Gradually falling back,

No one to catch my fall, was this my time,

Being destroyed and wrecked, and ruined

Is this me being devoured by my own self pity, I’m stuck going a million miles a minute, but haven’t moved once

Catastrophic catastrophe, flee, flee, continue to flee away from

Me

The devil smiling with glee, hoping to taste the very essence of me—

my soul is my church,

And you will not taste the best of

Why can’t you find your way to me

Why continue to lead me down to oblivion

Why can’t our story start now

You are my telescope

Looking into my everything

Seeing every sparkling star

Waiting on a decade

Just for you to be with me

Made up my mind a long time ago—

I’ll wait till you tell me no

The burden of this pain is melting me,

Metallic mercury reflecting the beautiful, the aura that you always are

Your congruent silhouette

silky smooth

Your supple and sweet lips

A Subtle touch

The smell of you

Enticingly painful

Your unforgiving smile

A Blissful tease

Drowning in your eyes

The most sublime

Your eagerness in conversing

Adored and mesmerizing

You are that guy who we all dream of

Sensual and Arousing

You are made up with all of the

Remembering when we first met

There was so much excitement

our eyes content,

Smiles awkwardly bent

And Before the night could end,

We learned how to sway and bend

We became undercover—

Secret lovers

Fixated on your true beauty—

Imagining the taste of your lips,

and then making my way

down, down,

caressing your silky skin, and hips

Remembering the day when

our eyes first met

Content with excitement

Nothing can compare

To the beauty

that is you

asphyxiated with temptation

creating that intangible space,

Allowing myself to take in

your beauty and grace

I will not sever our entangled heartstrings,

Like an ivory harp

bringing harmonic,

and savory dreams

But the worst things in life,

Is letting the ones we love

Down, down

Thinking that love is letting me go—

No, No

But blessed be

to the one who wears

The crown

But do you Remember back when we first met

Overly excited with such great content

Nothing compares to the one that is you

I don’t care today,

Or tomorrow

I won’t bother with the next day,

Either.

Gluttony and punishment

Is what to prevent,

But misery and company

Are calling for crumpets,

And tea

Flee, flee—

Run away,

and dive into your

Damn pity

It harshly fills you With

Everyday I see you, I see you walking through my thoughts, our newly made memories, My daydreams, the visions at night when thinking of you, and all of the sweetest things about you.

But it’s okay, I know, I get lost when looking into your soul— Purposely waiting on you, holding my breath till I turn your color— Chasing that purple hue, just to keep crashing into you.

I lay myself down to sleep,

Wanting this creeping of a feeling

Off,

and away from me—

Falling, falling,

into the deep

Scrapping the inners of my brain,

Finding me

in the center

Of it all—

Falling, falling,

Into the deep

Imogen Heap—

Just yet another

ambient daydream

Continuing to fall, fall,

Down, Into the deep