O'Captain, My Captain...

MY DUDE KEVIN LOOKIN REAL FUN SIZE LMAO

who the FUCK DOES THIS

when i was 12, i got home after trick or treating and i found a needle in a mars bar, please check your candy and be safe

Squeeze your candies in their wrappers (lightly) before unwrapping them. If the package deflates, then the wrapper has a hole in it and likely has been tampered with.

I think you can still take any kid’s halloween candy to like the hospital(or is it the police station or fire station???) and they’ll send it through a metal detector/check it for free! Check in your area, they still do it here!

Signal boost! Be safe for Halloween!

The fuck is wrong with those people?

Wow…this is just evil

just f*ckin no, this is cruel

You wouldn’t need a metal detector, just buy a strong magnet. Also, always squish and inspect the candy before AND after unwrapping. And obviously only accept wrapped treats.

If a girl feels uncomfortable hanging out with you alone, and you get so offended by that, it makes you angry, she probably made the right choice.

I know I’ve reblogged this recently but still so spot the fuck on.

my favorite part of flying home to texas is when the pilot yells YEEEEE HAWWWW WE’RE IN TEXAS NOW BOYS and fires his revolvers into the roof of the cockpit. 

We’re the generation of women who will teach their sons to act respectfully instead of teaching our daughters to beware

This is everything I stand for.

💪🏾