yo, nice skirt

so like jake and i have officially started our relationship as long distance about a month ago and it’s been incredibly fucking hard. i feel like everyday i fall more out of love with him and i hate saying that but it’s the truth. it’s so hard. we work completely opposite schedules so talking or even having a skype date is impossible. and the looming thought that this is going to be my life until he graduates in two years is just tearing me apart. i just don’t think i can do it. i have plans for the fall and the spring but they’re both 3,000 miles away from him. i just don’t think i can do that. if we were only a few hours that’s one thing but the fact that it’ll be a whole year and such a far distance between us is just so clouded for me. i hate saying all this because i love him i really do and he’s made me so incredibly happy and has been the most incredible boyfriend i ever could have asked for but like our situation right now just doesn’t seem realistic. i just don’t know what to do. part of me wants to end things but another part of me just can’t imagine my life without him. if we had started this relationship when he graduated or we were the same age this would be so much easier but reality sucks.