Dumbass Douchebag Revultion Jock Bro
aight bro, u wanna join da dumbass douchebag revulution, huh? respect, bro, cuz we out here makin gainz an thinkin' less, da right way! imma show u how to turn off ur brain an get swole, bro. no need for smart stuff, just muscles an tank tops. u ready? let’s goo, bro!
step 1: stop thinkin’ so much bro – just focus on liftin
bro, smart thots slow u down. u gotta think less an just lift more. if ur thinkin, u ain't liftin! u need to clear ur head an focus on dem muscles, bro. here’s how u do it:
how to turn ur brain off, bro:
grunt a lot – bro, when u feel a thot creepin up in ur head, just grunt. grunts block out da brain stuff. erry time u grunt, u get a lil dumber but also more swole. more grunts = more gainz.
count wrong – don't worry about counting right, bro. just do like “1… 2… uh… 10!” don’t waste brain energy on numbers, bro. just lift until ur arms feel like noodles. numbers are for nerds.
stare at urself – da more u look at urself flexin, da less u think. mirrors are key, bro. flex in da mirror for 10 mins and u’ll feel da brain fog settlin in. if u ain’t thinkin, ur winnin!
step 2: eat like a dumb bro – food for less thinkin’
bro, smart people eat complicated stuff, but we ain’t needin’ dat. we gotta keep da food simple, so da brain stays off an muscles grow, bro.
simple jock meal plan:
brekfast: 10 egg whites, bro, no yellow stuff, cuz yolk is too complicated. jus crack ‘em an cook ‘em. don’t even think bout it, just eat dem. den drink a protein shake, bro, but don’t think too hard on how much powder u put in, just pour an shake.
lunch: chicken, bro, jus chicken. u don’t need nothin fancy. jus grab some chicken and eat it. da less u think bout flavors, da better. thinkin slows down da gainz.
dinnar: more chicken, or steak if u wanna switch it up. but don’t think too much, bro, steak is jus beef chicken. eat dat, maybe add some broccoli if u feel fancy, but dats it. simple = swole.
snakks: peanut butter, right out da jar, bro. don’t even use a spoon, jus scoop it wit ur hand if u gotta. drink protein shakes whenever u think too much, dat’ll stop da smart thots.
step 3: dress like a jock, bro – look dumb, lift big
bro, ur clothes gotta scream “i don’t think, i just lift.” da right gear stops ur brain from workin' an shows erryone dat ur all about da gainz.
jock bro style:
tank tops: da less shirt, da better, bro. if ur tank ain’t showin’ ur nips, it’s too much. u worked hard for dem muscles, show ‘em off. less shirt = less thots.
short shorts: u gotta show dem legz, bro. even if u don’t work legs much, u wear da short shorts. da shorter, da less brain power u use. simple math, bro.
backwards hat: wear ur hat backwards, always. makes u look more like a badass jock, plus it keeps da brain from overheatin’. dat’s science, bro, trust me.
step 4: act like a jock bro – no thinkin, just doin
bein part of da dumbass douchebag revolution means actin like u own da world, bro. don’t let smart people get in ur way, jus be loud and confident, like errywhere u go is ur gym.
how to act, bro:
flex errywhere: see a mirror? flex. don’t even think twice, just do it. flexin' is like a brain reset, it turns off any smart thots u might accidentally have.
talk bout liftin all da time: bro, if someone tryna talk bout somethin' else, jus say “yo bro, how much u bench tho?” dat’ll stop da convo from gettin smart. always bring it back to da gym, bro. liftin' is life.
grunt loud af: grunt whenever u do stuff, not just in da gym. grunt when u lift, grunt when u open a door, grunt when u stand up. it shows ur serious about bein' a jock bro an it keeps ur brain from thinkin’.
conclusion: welcome to da revolution, bro
bro, now u know how to join da dumbass douchebag revolution. jus think less, lift more, eat simple, an dress like a beast. we don’t need smarts, bro, we jus need gainz. u ready to be part of da swole squad? let’s gooo bro! time to lift and never think again!
