Jetsetter Jeff

Deciding to leave California would’ve been a lot easier without these jerks.

[P.S.: Arthur, I’m stealing your photos, thanks.]

We were truly, incredibly fortunate during our time in California to meet so many great people. In fact, I’d venture to say the proportion of swell-to-crummy people in California is much higher than in Philadelphia. Or, at least, they take better Instagram photos. Still,…

Five months ago…

Lance and I had a Very Serious Conversation about six months into our tenure in California, after both of us found gainful employment and had sampled all the local fast food chicken fingers (Carls Jr=::thumbs up::, Jack in the Box=::go to hell!!!::).

It was in this conversation that we decided, hey, yes, we were going to move back to Philadelphia.

For many of the reasons covered…

Lance and Jeff's California Pros and Cons, new on Lance+Jeff

Sorry for the delay in posts, youse guys. You know how it goes, you have the best of intentions and then Netflix drops a whole season of Marvel’s Daredevil on you at once and you just lose track of your entire life.

Oh oh, and I forgot to put the little flashback timeframe tag here. Ya walk away for a few days and you just forget everything, am I right?

Seven months ago…

I’m not sure there’s…

“Oh, you’re going to Disneyland again?” I’ve been asked with a smirk.

Or there are the conversations that have ground to a halt when I said I saw Frozen before most of my co-workers who have kids.

Admitting I’m a Disney fan as a 29-year-old gets its fair share of raised eyebrows. Though nerdy fandoms have come a long way, this one still gets treated with a spoonful of judgment.

All of that is to…

Stay-At-Home Puppy Daddy, new on Lance+Jeff!

Ripley and Lance ham it up during a California photo shoot.

It’s obvious I don’t plan these things more than a day in advance since Lance just reminded me that I forgot to shine a spotlight on his tenure as a stay-at-home puppy daddy while we lived in California.

(In this scenario, we don’t count Kitty, since: 1) she’s pretty self-sufficient; and 2) Lance hates her.)

While, sure, we were…

Ehh…maybe 8-9 months ago? I can’t count…

The Darkest Timeline concept will be, perhaps, Community‘s enduring legacy on the Internet. In the season three episode “Remedial Chaos Theory,” the gang play a board game where, with each roll of the die, we are presented with a different timeline based on how the die falls, one timeline being the most depressing and cynical of them all.

After about two…

10 months ago…

Places can wear you down over time, and that’s how we’d grown to feel about Philly toward the end. California was, at first, a much-needed mental reset button for us.

The first time I can recall being sold the California dream was when I saw the 1997 hit(?) animated film Cats Don’t Dance.In the film, protagonist Danny (a cat, obvs) makes it to California and shares his “I want”…

Frequent Flier Feline.

11 months ago…

“Nope.” Lance shook his head, like he was angry that the thought had even crossed my mind. “It’s not going to happen. You take her or she stays here.”

This was one of our first of many fights about our move to California. Perhaps an omen we should have paid attention to?

At this point, we had submitted our resignation letters, ordered a Door-to-Door moving…

13 months ago…

Lance and I always had The Itch to cut ties with Philadelphia. Like most cities in the Northeast, it’s dirty, full of trashy, abrasive people, and overcast about eight months of the year. When I moved to Philly from Michigan for grad school, my relocation was intended to be temporary–I ended up staying for love (SICK!).

Heck, Lance has even tried to escape Philly before.  For some…

Could it be...have we returned? See what we've been up to in the BRAND NEW Lance+Jeff!

  Remember the season 2 finale of “Alias” where, after fighting the genetically-warped clone of her dead roommate, Sydney collapses only to wake up in Taipei two years later. What?! And Vaughn is married, that son of a bitch! WHAT?? And Sydney has a mysterious scar on her torso which we later find out is from where a secret society was harvesting her eggs for…

OH JESUS. I should’ve just stopped…