Nerd Garbage

why are greek mythology adaptations always so gritty when there’s so many weird ridiculous antics to pull from. helen of troy not knowing how to cheer up telemachus so she drugs him to not feel any emotions and calls it a night. athena divinely intervening to curl odysseus’ hair so he looks sexy enough to successfully beg for help. aphrodite trying to help her kid on the battlefield and having to run away immediately because she gets beat up by a random mortal. achilles’ horse prophesying death to him and then never speaking again

there’s a dedicated ashandpikachuspotter account somewhere on some social media. You tag a photo or search for a term and boom, there’s pics of this guy. this dude. this man. with his pikachu. and it’s thousands of strangers from across the globe coming on line to talk about some stranger that they met briefly and then never saw again. they’ve compiled their stories and their approximate locations and mapped his journey from continent to continent, a long snaking pathway that spans decades and thousands of miles. He’s apparently one of those Kanto kids that the government let just drop out of school. Its working out very well for him. 

Thats so funny, to imagine him as a pokeweb criptid type character a la the florida man

Pokemon Heritage Post

I love when romanceable videogame charas have a friendship version of the romance scenes.... i love you can eat cookies with sera in the roof and they are "inquisition cookies" instead of "us cookies"... i love that you can spend the night with gale telling him he doesnt need to sacrifice himself and he is like "fuck you for bringing me friends and adventures now i dont want to die" thats the good stuff... i love that if you don't do the romance you get different convers that add a lot to how the character acts with a good friend, instead of just "oh well you didn't date them so no special bonding for you in friendship either"

I’m afraid some of ya’ll just don’t have the freak gene that lets you enjoy ACTUAL enemies to lovers. Ya’ll think that trope is just like coworkers fighting over a promotion or smth like no give me people that have tried to maim and kill one another or give me nothing

the urge to write never leaves but the motivation to do so is a lover lost at war

Hold on, let me look something up real quick

Yeah this is funny

Rewatching atla episodes for Reasons and I just realised that Zuko found Appa the night after he found out he was missing. The gaang have been desperately searching for, what? A few weeks? And Zuko sees a poster saying Appa is missing and just squares tf up and finds him immediately. What a fucking madman. 

This comes in handy when he has kids.

He absolutely found his mother. And I cannot believe I am only just now noticing this whole concept.

Also while he took years to find the avatar, the avatar was in ice basically that whole time. Once the avatar had been freed from the ice Zuko found him IMMEDIATELY

odysseus absolutely does present a threat to penelope if he perceives her as at all unfaithful, and i feel the unfairness of this, and i think people tend to undersell how much tension at least potentially exists between odysseus and penelope. but i'm also like. his reaction, all speculation aside, his actual reaction in the odyssey to her flirting with the suitors is delight, because he immediately ascertains that she is running a con. sorry that they're so in-sync in spite of the forces that try to drive a wedge between them, including their own misgiving hearts. sorry that they invented homophrosyne ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

would i, tumblr user thee odysseyofhomer, lie to you?

...

this is the only funny addition to this post

how do I explain to people that I genuinely and with 100% sincerity think that the greatest love story in all of fiction is a 6.5 minute dnd podcast monologue about a character named barry bluejeans and his hot elf girlfriend playing music and holding hands

we did it! we saved the fucking whales!!!!