1. Eloise did not want to be at those lessons, and Hyacinth was well aware that Eloise had no interest in being there, she even insulted her over them ("You might learn something from the lesson on posture") but nobody cares about how little regard Hyacinth shows her there. And when has Hyacinth ever taken any of Eloise's interests seriously? When has anybody? Nobody cares about what Eloise has to say, or think, yet the only character that ever needs to apologize is Eloise because she doesn't want to engage in a discussion about the lessons on table setting that she was already subjected to. Not to mention, Hyacinth has literally a ton full of women who share these interests because they're the only thing women are allowed to like, whilst Eloise is the only one who actually thinks outside the confines of the ton and is constantly ridiculed for it, I'm so sorry, but I really fail to see how Hyacinth, of all people, is the victim here
2. Violet did not ask Eloise, that would imply Eloise was there willingly, she told Eloise she could either be forced to talk to suitors again, or she could go to the lessons, that's hardly a choice, and it wasn't because she wanted Eloise to be productive, it was because Violet knew Eloise hated those lessons and was hoping it would be enough to force Eloise back on the market, because Violet is a controlling, selfish, manipulative, absolutely awful excuse of a mother, if this was the modern era, Eloise would've gone at least low-contact with her, and I would cheer. And I'm not going to respond to the comment on how Eloise "put herself in this position" because... yikes
3. Eloise is not afraid of familial or platonic love?? I don't know where that is coming from, she is so open with her love towards her friends and family, I genuinely don't know where this interpretation is coming from. And Eloise's aversion to marriage is way deeper than just being 'afraid of losing herself', it genuinely bugs me when people boil it down to that, because Eloise detests that marriage turns women into property of their husbands, who can do whatever they like to their wives and face no consequences, that's not fear of losing herself, that's basic self-preservation. She also detests that marriage is the only thing women are allowed to have, she wants to go to university, she wants to travel the world, she wants to study, and explore more of who she is and what the world has to offer—but the fandom has to boil it down to "she just doesn't understand the power of TRUE LOVE" because if they actually listened to what she said, they couldn't ignore how tone-deaf that argument is. Also, Eloise has been open to the love of her family and friends all these seasons, it is her family and friends that continue to ignore, sideline, and diminish her interests, and beat her into submission until she fits the tradwife mold. I don't understand how Eloise's arc could be read as being about about learning "that true, unconditional love does not force you to hide, it allows you to act freely and love openly" seeing as everything that has happened to Eloise has been... the exact opposite of that. She wasn't allowed to go to political rallies, she isn't allowed to just be a spinster in peace, like 25% of noble women in that era—because her mom's a bitch—she can't focus on writing in her journal—because her mom's a bitch—she can't read in peace—because her mom's a bitch—she can't even choose to remain impartial to the presence of a child—because her mom's a bitch.
I completely understand what you're trying to say, and this is no hate to you, but Eloise's arc cannot be about how 'true love allows you to be yourself' when every aspect of Eloise is being degraded and belittled so that she can realistically become P*ilip's stepford wife. The show and characters do not let Eloise act freely and openly, they actively punish her whenever she tries, so her arc is more "women who are feminists are just stupid, whiny, privileged girls who do not understand love, and childfree women are just selfish, but it's okay, they just need a man to come and fix them and unlock their true maternal side, then they'll give up their desire for education, equal opportunity, and rights, because they'll have a husband and a family, and that's all that any woman needs!!"
(Evident by how they spoke of Mary Wollstonecraft and how Violet said she didn't need to be rebellious because she had TrUe LoVe)
