Just Trying To Live My Life.

Til next time Tumblr, thanks for listening.

Had a heart to heart talk with my boyfriend the other night about certain things. It's really hard to be happy when there's a major factor that comes in between your happiness. I set myself up for this disappointment though. I was sooooo positive that by now this problem would be overwith, but it's not and I guess that's why it started to bother me again. I was doing fine with it not bothering me much anymore. I also think that with the major decision for John to move here it has brought the situation up again because it does play a major factor with the move. I just wish it would be overwith and we could be completely happy without any problems, but I guess life isn't perfect right? I wish people would stop treating us like we're kids because we're not. There are people who are married WITH kids by the time they're our age. There are people who get married at our age being in a relationship that is not as solid as ours. Our relationship just works and that's why I love it. It's hard. He loves me and I love him and it's as simple as that. Even if there are certain problems that can't go away, we love each other and seriously.... that's enough. It really is enough. I'm not going to lie and say that sometimes I don't get curious about what would happen if I didn't have him in my life as a boyfriend, or what life would be had I chosen a different path, but the path I chose was to be with him.. and I love that I chose this path. I'm happy with this path. We have this connection that no one will ever understand. I just wish that people would stop being so ignorant about our love because we've been together for 5 & a half years. We obviously aren't kids fooling around THINKING we're in love anymore. But whatever.. lol this entry is all kinds of random.. I ended up venting about everything but whatever.. just saying. I remember having so much fear about being in a long distance relationship with him because he's new to it and I didn't know how things were going to work out... but... it's working. We've been doing this for 5 months now. I mean it's so hard not having him around... but our relationship is solid enough to be okay during this tough time... I can't wait until he moves here though forreal. It will be great but one step at a time.. I'm still adjusting to my life in Sacramento and getting my life in order. He's still getting his in order to move. Hopefully next year.... 

Definitely been going through speed bumps in my relationship. I thought distance would be nothing. I was like "oh I did it before. I can do it again." Nope. It's much harder than it was before. I didn't keep in mind that my first was during middle/high school. It's different now because we're grown & have to make grown decisions. My move has definitely pushed us to really grow up and talk about the future and set goals and do what we gotta do to make them happen. It's been super tough and trying to do the right thing by staying a part until we got our shit together has been so hard. I just want him here already.  I want to see him every day already. But I know I have to be patient. It will be worth the wait because at the end, we'll have everything we've ever wanted for ourselves. I just cannot wait until the day I can say it's officially moving day for him to be here with me. I really am lucky though. Past relationships have scarred me but he's always and still been there to work things out with me. I'm really just lucky... he's really the one I want to grow old with.

Things I've been up to: - Losing weight. Loving the gym life. Almost at the -10lbs mark. Currently suffering from shin splints but I will be ok. Refuse to let it stop me. - Been living in Sacramento since March. Things are going good. It gets lonely sometimes cuz I don't know anyone but I'll be ok. - Getting my life together one step at a time.