gothic bohemia

notes to be written in unspoken pen needing to be filled then tossed away crumpled at the bottom of his little bag.

the crinkled surface of risen papered ridges. the feeling of your palms.

the boy who you were with is long gone

working on tying knots on his sailing boat

a handsome work of wood, the smell of wetter wood like sweet cedar. woodblocks like icecubes you chew. the lower back aches now in schedules

towards a kindled twisting of waters 

so much at sea is to be avoided but to set sail is to not see you again.

you, a lighthouse. guidance which is to be refused by a juvenile acting out 

in a mis-present un-confidence

too young to grasp too old to learn

"you are just like your father", said far too often

we say sorry at least

but sorry ones times too often

like learning but too little then too late

no longer needed the house you grew up

no longer see when the door opens to

the eyes that set away the center that is black and cyclic spiraling dark you are blackened standing outside my bathroom feet hovered over the tile i waited for a toe to twitch the sour smell of my insides my guts a bubbling sewer of all that is dirty and rotten inside me you stand by the shore your eyelids are dusted with the sand that wanders the breeze i pick up the phone and we are somewhere in europe but the room doesn't change a painting of the eifel tower hangs where my window should be a soft warm sun still finds me in the room you are blackened standing outside my bathroom feet hovered over the tile thin white stockings and a lace top

jejune music blog

Review #1

Hello everyone welcome to my first ever song review. I've always wanted to do a music blog so here it is.

This first song is called I Can Feel a Hot One by Manchester Orchestra.

This is one of those songs that have survived a long time for me; in the way that it still comes up every once in awhile in memory -- and when I'm reminded of it, I go on and listen to it. It holds up, but it is very much marked in all the trappings of that era.

I can only offer a little bit about the artist, Manchester Orchestra. If I remember properly the lead guy of it started pursuing music when he was young, like instead of the normal life track of schooling. I actually heard this song for the first time on Emily is Away, or maybe its sequel. The soundtrack of which are full of these really specific cuts of music from that time, which produce a feeling of being a teenager again who is in the know! Lke that feeling of finding this really cool band that no one else knows about and suddenly you're part of this cool ingroup of cool people who "Get it", but if you were like me you'd be too scared to talk to them and you just live with a passive satisfaction. This is one of those bands, for the overly sensitive.

The song starts on this quiet plucked guitar riff. The electric guitar tone is warm with a slight rounded distortion which mostly compresses the sound - making it tube-y or lofi. His voice comes in and it feels light and teenaged, with a youthful mid to top end. But his delivery is not amteurish, he sings well and full, just with a more emotive quality - like a slight whine. It resonates much like the voice of Conor Oberist of Bright Eyes, that kind of style. The song is anchored by these few sad chords, it revolves around this feeling of unretrieved saddnesss. Like its sitting on the shelf, always in view, unable to resolve fully. Somtthing like that.

The entire song is very angsty. It manages to be very large though, unlike the more bedroom-y spaced and intimacy of a song like i was all over her by salvia palth. -- a song which cornerstones this sect of 2010s indie emo sound. I think they are related.

There is a surprising variety of instruments and textures for this genre. A very low cello eventually comes in, among other instruments, synths and layered backing vocals. The instrumentation is sparsely laid out with ample space for each to really come into its own as an element. The gradually lain out layers of sound provide the feeling of progression in the song, as well as his growingly restless delivery all built on this still unchanging riff. The feeling of an unretrieved sadness gradually blooms into a fullon anthem, sounding healing almost.

Then in the middle of the song the chords finally change into something more swirling in what feels like a drawn out resolution to the song. And he ends this new section of the song "..And I felt love again"

Then the song returns back into its verse. It goes on briefly, and his restraint is lost, going from sung lyrics into scatting, following the vocal melody.

Overall the song is surprisingly dense. Most people might find it a bit too melodramatic. It does preach, but he's so earnest about it its hard to be annoyed. The lyrics are not so bad either. They do their job, but I don't think they're particularly grabbing. They mostly just feel like aesthetic fixtures that add vaguely to the meaning of the soundscape.