! JAY !

“This, isn’t worthless.”

“There is no ‘this’. This is nothing.”

“And I am nothing. And as you’ve always said, you want nothing.”

"Neil hesitated, then set the bag on Matt's bed and struggled out of his shirt. It was getting a little easier every day, but it hurt when he raised his arms too high and when he twisted he felt the pull at his stitches. He got his shirt over his head and to his elbows before Andrew got tired of watching him struggle and tugged the shirt loose. Andrew tossed it off to one side and didn't look to see where it landed. He was more interested in the scars and bruises covering Neil's front."

This chapter holds so many great passages I might draw another one from it asp. But in this one there was something that felt very real, a mix of pain and trust and interest and discovery, and even desire maybe.

“He'd come to the Foxhole Court every inch a lie, but his friends made him into someone real.”

I’m not gonna lie it’s borderline embarrassing how long I’ve worked on this that I’ve spend 2 days tryna figure out how to caption it to make it less embarrassing but oh well. It also made me realise the banner says exy ncaa instead of ncaa exy but at this point that’s none of my business

Short of being inside Nora’s head here is a (mostly) (I think) biblically accurate and to scale model of the Foxhole Court and Nora I have a several questions.

Also rendered so many images of this I had like 50 cameras in the scene would y’all care if I just did a photo dump.

God I have so many things to say about working on this I had to restart like 8 times it was a mess but if I start I won't be able to stop Imao though if anyone's interested in a breakdown of all the sections and materials I would be more than happy to make a post yapping about it.

Viewport renders below

i can try to pretend, i can try to forget